All points noted hun.
I just hope you did not take my post at a dig at you or Judy.
It's just that every time this topic pops it's ugly head the only people that are mentioned are ""singlies"" (males) to coin a phrase.
phredd
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Sex God
Duncan,
Problem with your post is that the Munches are not events aimed at any commercial gain.
They are organised by people who just want other people to have fun.
We went to the NE munch a few weeks ago, very well organised by Fabiogroovrider, he had all the tension of finding a venue, maintaining a list, sending out invites etc. On the night he could not enjoy himself as we did as he was making sure everyone was haiving a good time. For all this effort, he made nothing, in fact I believe that it cost him personally some money to hire the DJ. Yes there was a collection, but he donated that to charity.
I think that the normal rule of thumb applies to all parties; out of all who say they will turn up only 2/3 actually do!! But surley people should recognise the immense effort the organisers put into these event and make sure that if you can't make it, then let them know as early as possible!!
We are very gratful to all the people who are willing to organise Munches and events for the rest of us.
There does not seem to be any hint of applogy in your posting for not turning up to the Munch, which does you no credit at all.
John & Shel
Problem with your post is that the Munches are not events aimed at any commercial gain.
They are organised by people who just want other people to have fun.
We went to the NE munch a few weeks ago, very well organised by Fabiogroovrider, he had all the tension of finding a venue, maintaining a list, sending out invites etc. On the night he could not enjoy himself as we did as he was making sure everyone was haiving a good time. For all this effort, he made nothing, in fact I believe that it cost him personally some money to hire the DJ. Yes there was a collection, but he donated that to charity.
I think that the normal rule of thumb applies to all parties; out of all who say they will turn up only 2/3 actually do!! But surley people should recognise the immense effort the organisers put into these event and make sure that if you can't make it, then let them know as early as possible!!
We are very gratful to all the people who are willing to organise Munches and events for the rest of us.
There does not seem to be any hint of applogy in your posting for not turning up to the Munch, which does you no credit at all.
John & Shel
Sex God
Helen... i am sorry that that happened to you last night..... all it takes is common curtosy and one phone call to let the organisors know....
I have been quite lucky where the NE munches i have organised hasn't suffered from a lot of no shows.....but i have seen what affect it has had on organisors then have had that happen to them.......
it is one of the disussions that i have with other munch organisors alot....
I am not a fan of the 3 strikes idea... but keeping no shows is a central location is a good idea as the munch idea is still given the final decision on whether to invite or not.....
also i would ask someone in a offical capacity to e-mail the offenders and ask why they couldn't let someone know.....
if helen decides not to organise another london event... then in the end the people in that area lose out......
sean xxxxx
I have been quite lucky where the NE munches i have organised hasn't suffered from a lot of no shows.....but i have seen what affect it has had on organisors then have had that happen to them.......
it is one of the disussions that i have with other munch organisors alot....
I am not a fan of the 3 strikes idea... but keeping no shows is a central location is a good idea as the munch idea is still given the final decision on whether to invite or not.....
also i would ask someone in a offical capacity to e-mail the offenders and ask why they couldn't let someone know.....
if helen decides not to organise another london event... then in the end the people in that area lose out......
sean xxxxx
Quote by duncanlondon
This is redundant and victim oriented.
I asked for an invite, which I got and I knew about the event. I was one who didn't go.
Its unfortunate for organisers of any events, but that's the risk you take in the promotion game. I have organised and flopped, so I know how it feels.
Your comments are cold and offhand and make no offer of apology. It's unfortunate but you probably won't be invited to any more events. You were trusted and you failed. Tough!
:x Quote by duncanlondon
This is redundant and victim oriented.
I asked for an invite, which I got and I knew about the event. I was one who didn't go.
Its unfortunate for organisers of any events, but that's the risk you take in the promotion game. I have organised and flopped, so I know how it feels.
So is this a Gloat post. ?? or are you saying that you are sorry?
I can see no remorse or apology in your comments. = I just hope NEVER to see you at a munch.
phredd
Sex God
Quote by EagerSlut
Why do people post on a thread "You have a PM"?
FFS, the recipient knows they've got a PM!
:huh:
Because what they are really saying is 'Rest of the World - you do not NOT have a PM'?
Sex God
Well as a couple of newbies who have got their names down for Helen's Midlands Bash, we just want her to know.........
Helen hun we are really looking forward to it, and have every intention of being there and enjoying ourselves..... but if we can't make it we WILL let you know........ promise
It is very sad that people can be so fecking rude that not only do they not care, but they can even go as far as posting in an unrepentant manner such as happened a page or so back in this thread.
It is ironic that we didn't put ourselves forward for this one cos we didn't meet the criteria (hadn't been around long enough), when we have actually met socially at least one person who was there, and know of a few others from PM's....... We would have loved it !
I guess all the suggestions made here earlier might go someways to help with this kind of issue, but it won't stop until pig ignorant attitudes are changed .
M & H
Helen hun we are really looking forward to it, and have every intention of being there and enjoying ourselves..... but if we can't make it we WILL let you know........ promise
It is very sad that people can be so fecking rude that not only do they not care, but they can even go as far as posting in an unrepentant manner such as happened a page or so back in this thread.
It is ironic that we didn't put ourselves forward for this one cos we didn't meet the criteria (hadn't been around long enough), when we have actually met socially at least one person who was there, and know of a few others from PM's....... We would have loved it !
I guess all the suggestions made here earlier might go someways to help with this kind of issue, but it won't stop until pig ignorant attitudes are changed .
M & H
Quote by duncanlondon
This is redundant and victim oriented.
I asked for an invite, which I got and I knew about the event. I was one who didn't go.
Its unfortunate for organisers of any events, but that's the risk you take in the promotion game. I have organised and flopped, so I know how it feels.
I wasnt going to add to this thread because its all been said. But after seeing the above!!
I asked for an invite, and i got one, so i knew about it, So i went and i enjoyed it. If something had cropped up and i couldnt have made it then i would have picked up the phone and called Helen to explain why. It would only take 2 mins at most and its common decency to do so!
Next time you ask for an invite, just give a little thought for the person you are going to let down, again!
Quote by duncanlondon
This is redundant and victim oriented.
I asked for an invite, which I got and I knew about the event. I was one who didn't go.
Its unfortunate for organisers of any events, but that's the risk you take in the promotion game. I have organised and flopped, so I know how it feels.
Well............Havent you endeared yourself to the rest of the site?
As some of you may know in the middle of January this year I suffered a heart attack on the very same day we were destined for a posh hotel to go to a dinner dance..
Now we had to pay for this.....Tickets......Accomodation etc but what was Shireen's first priority after ensuring I was safely tucked up in hospital???......Phoning round to tell people we would not be attending :shock:
If she can do that in what were harrowing times for her then surely someone can phone to say they cant make it to a munch......
And as for Duncan well..........I think his goose is well and truly cooked when it comes to going to another munch if indeed he didnt bother to say he wasnt going to make it....
Helen,
Babe ....... dont let it get to you .............. some people are just plain RUDE and IGNORANT.
I totally agree with Steve Mids
A post or a PM costs nothing, a text is about 10p ..... if people cant make it they SHOULD, IF THEY HAVE ANY MANNERS let you know........
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Babe ....... dont let it get to you .............. some people are just plain RUDE and IGNORANT.
I totally agree with Steve Mids
A post or a PM costs nothing, a text is about 10p ..... if people cant make it they SHOULD, IF THEY HAVE ANY MANNERS let you know........
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Quote by DreamerHelen
I have posted in here a couple of times with a few lighthearted remarks but for the first time I really have to RANT!!!
BEWARE bad language about to follow!!
I am sooooo fucking mad right now. I organised a Munch last night, it's been planned since May and there were originally 90-odd people on the list.....
Just to make it clear, i have NO problems with those that can't make it for whatever reason and let me know by some form of communication (text, phone, PM, Email or on the thread)....we all know things happen, even on the night that means people can't make it, so please be CLEAR I don't have a problem with those people....
What i DO have a huge fucking problem with is those people that say they want to come, ask to come and even sometimes beg to come and then don't fucking well turn up!!!
I have sent out two different PM's - One saying "You are definitely invited, stand by for details" and One saying "Here is your invite the Munch will be at such and such a place".....so people can't say they didn't get an Invite and if they didn't get an Invite they should have PM'd me to say so!!!
I very nearly didn't have enough money to pay the Bouncer last night, a measley £50 because people didn't bother to turn up!!! We had 25 people that turned up last night out of nearly 90 that were on the list!!!! And granted about 10 people had PM'd me or Texted me to say they couldn't come which was fine, but where were the other 55 people that didn't turn up!!!!!!!! :x
I am sooooo fucking mad right now at the inconsiderate people that almost ruined nearly 6 months of planning and organising.....well I hope you're all proud of yourselves and feel very ashamed of yourselves......If you have any decency you'll send me a PM today about why you weren't there!!!!
Right, rant over......Phew, I feel a bit better now.....
Well i think this just about sums up why only known people and people who can be vouched usually get munch invites, so many newbies moan they do not get invites and say you have to be part of the incroud to get in, then you go and invite them and they don't show, i recon dawns idea is a good one everytime you get a no show PM a mod black list the ones who keep not turning up.
New i'm all for new people going to munches its great to see new faces as well as old one's but when someone had taken so long to organise a munch it really is damn right rude to not turn up when you have asked for a invite, as helen has said we all know things turn up and sometimes you can't make it but bloody hell what does it take to send off a PM?
Sex God
Quote by naughtynymphos1
.....so many newbies moan they do not get invites and say you have to be part of the incroud to get in, then you go and invite them and they don't show, i recon dawns idea is a good one everytime you get a no show PM a mod black list the ones who keep not turning up.
New i'm all for new people going to munches its great to see new faces as well as old one's but when someone had taken so long to organise a munch it really is damn right rude to not turn up when you have asked for a invite, as helen has said we all know things turn up and sometimes you can't make it but bloody hell what does it take to send off a PM?
I'm all for a 'no-show' blacklist but I'm willing to bet it is not populated exclusively by noobs!
Quote by Steve_Mids
As some of you may know in the middle of January this year I suffered a heart attack on the very same day we were destined for a posh hotel to go to a dinner dance..
Now we had to pay for this.....Tickets......Accomodation etc but what was Shireen's first priority after ensuring I was safely tucked up in hospital???......Phoning round to tell people we would not be attending :shock:
Actually sweetheart I seem to recall that it was just after the ambulance had arrived and while the paramedics were looking at you that I phoned a friend to say that you were HAVING a heart attack
It nearly gave him one as well at the time 
But yes surely it is the height of manners to at least send a text/PM to say really sorry etc??
You dont even have to give a reason....I definately agree with the list for persistant no show'ers
Shireen
xxx
Quote by Sexysteph
Hang on NN has it been established that this is a newbie problem????????
Sorry maybe i'm just getting carried away with myself, everytime i have had a no show on a private meet or when i have spoken to others about their no shows at meets, munches etc it always seems to be new people to, i genrally think that well know people on the site know how much effort goes into such things as munches and i have always found they let people know, but i admit i am no expert on the matter so i'm shut my gob and go to work
Sex God
Quote by judy
Duncan, with your attitude I am afraid Manchester doesn't want you..........ever.
I can vouch for South Manchester, we dont need or want attitudes like dumcan. I will make sure they feel unwelcome here. H, red is plenty for South Manc.
Quote by Shireen_Mids
As some of you may know in the middle of January this year I suffered a heart attack on the very same day we were destined for a posh hotel to go to a dinner dance..
Now we had to pay for this.....Tickets......Accomodation etc but what was Shireen's first priority after ensuring I was safely tucked up in hospital???......Phoning round to tell people we would not be attending :shock:
Actually sweetheart I seem to recall that it was just after the ambulance had arrived and while the paramedics were looking at you that I phoned a friend to say that you were HAVING a heart attack
It nearly gave him one as well at the time But yes surely it is the height of manners to at least send a text/PM to say really sorry etc??
You dont even have to give a reason....I definately agree with the list for persistant no show'ers
Shireen
xxx
What ......... You couldnt wait untill I was actually IN hospital :!: :!: :!:
Sheeeeesh...
Quote by naughtynymphos1
Well i think this just about sums up why only known people and people who can be vouched usually get munch invites, so many newbies moan they do not get invites and say you have to be part of the incroud to get in, then you go and invite them and they don't show, i recon dawns idea is a good one everytime you get a no show PM a mod black list the ones who keep not turning up.
Not much to add here, but just a couple of comments. I honestly don't think that this is solely restricted to a newbie issue, I think that has been confirmed by previous posts to this thread. There has been some very regular posters on here that still fail to attend.
I do totally agree with RedHot's comments, but then I would, I would hate to suffer the wrath of TJ
My only concern would be how this list was handled. Once we start to do lists, would it just end there, or would this just be the start of many lists?
How exactly would it run? Would a munch organisor reply in the munch thread to say that no, so and so can't come because he/she did not attend so and so event. Surely that is naming and shaming in a way?
Whilst I agree with a list for no-shows, I just think that the rules governing it's use would have to be strictly controlled.
Just my two-penneth
Sex God
Quote by Manolishi
I do totally agree with RedHot's comments, but then I would, I would hate to suffer the wrath of TJ
:shock: Oi! What's that supposed to mean? There are plenty who would lurve a good tongue lashing from me mate :roll:
I don't suffer fools gladly, but you know deep down I'm just a softy
Quote by Manolishi
How exactly would it run? Would a munch organisor reply in the munch thread to say that no, so and so can't come because he/she did not attend so and so event. Surely that is naming and shaming in a way?
Whilst I agree with a list for no-shows, I just think that the rules governing it's use would have to be strictly controlled.
I don't imagine for one minute people on a list would be mentioned on a forum thread.
Both Dawn and Jags have offered to compile such a list, but it would appear that it would probably be done privately in conjunction with supplied lists of no-shows from munch organisers, if it gets to go ahead at all.
Some have openly named themselves as no-shows it is true, but that is their prerogative. They have not been forced into doing so, nor had the choice of annonimity taken away from them. Publicly naming and shaming is not what this is all about.
It is simply about trying to help munch/social organisers cut back the dead wood and give them a firm vantage point in the form of a list which would consist of people who were *more likely* to turn up than not.
With anything in life, there are no guarantees, but it stands to reason, if a member has been a no-show/no contact on more than one occasion, he/she will do it again and again.
All this could be avoided however, if only people were more honest and well mannered, but to some, hiding behind a screen and winding people up seems to give their menial little lives some purpose. It's pathetic.
Manners cost absolutely NOTHING, but seem to be viewed as no longer necessary by a lot of people today
T-J
perhaps the established group of organisers can add a disclaimer like....
'notice of non attendance at event must be given with at least 12 hours notice, anyone not doing so without good reason will be added to the non attenders list'
it is then at the discression of the organiser to decided if they want non attenders on the list. Then if they choose to not attend again, the organiser knows to expect it.
im sure the only people who have anything to lose by such a list are those who dont attend?
perhaps this system only applies to those who 'definately confirm' attendance in the 7 days before the event. Perhaps it would also mean more places for people who genuinely want to attend events which are heavily booked.
'notice of non attendance at event must be given with at least 12 hours notice, anyone not doing so without good reason will be added to the non attenders list'
it is then at the discression of the organiser to decided if they want non attenders on the list. Then if they choose to not attend again, the organiser knows to expect it.
im sure the only people who have anything to lose by such a list are those who dont attend?
perhaps this system only applies to those who 'definately confirm' attendance in the 7 days before the event. Perhaps it would also mean more places for people who genuinely want to attend events which are heavily booked.
Quote by RedHot
I do totally agree with RedHot's comments, but then I would, I would hate to suffer the wrath of TJ
:shock: Oi! What's that supposed to mean? There are plenty who would lurve a good tongue lashing from me mate :roll:
I don't suffer fools gladly, but you know deep down I'm just a softy
Quote by Manolishi
How exactly would it run? Would a munch organisor reply in the munch thread to say that no, so and so can't come because he/she did not attend so and so event. Surely that is naming and shaming in a way?
Whilst I agree with a list for no-shows, I just think that the rules governing it's use would have to be strictly controlled.
I don't imagine for one minute people on a list would be mentioned on a forum thread.
Both Dawn and Jags have offered to compile such a list, but it would appear that it would probably be done privately in conjunction with supplied lists of no-shows from munch organisers, if it gets to go ahead at all.
Some have openly named themselves as no-shows it is true, but that is their prerogative. They have not been forced into doing so, nor had the choice of annonimity taken away from them. Publicly naming and shaming is not what this is all about.
It is simply about trying to help munch/social organisers cut back the dead wood and give them a firm vantage point in the form of a list which would consist of people who were *more likely* to turn up than not.
With anything in life, there are no guarantees, but it stands to reason, if a member has been a no-show/no contact on more than one occasion, he/she will do it again and again.
All this could be avoided however, if only people were more honest and well mannered, but to some, hiding behind a screen and winding people up seems to give their menial little lives some purpose. It's pathetic.
Manners cost absolutely NOTHING, but seem to be viewed as no longer necessary by a lot of people today
T-J
Well as much I would like to disagree, for the sole purposes of getting a tongue lashing from TJ - I can't.
Can I have a tongue lashing anyway? :twisted: :twisted:
Don't get me wrong, I am not disagreeing with a list, I am just saying we have to be careful how we use it.
Sex God
I feel like crap today and couldn't care less about lists, no shows etc cos when you organise something unless you know them personally always count on at least 2 out of 10 not coming. Then if they don't show again simply tell them, you didn't bother turning up the last two/3 times so it's a no...... tough shite.
Lists of people doing this that and the other would only serve to cause more splits and factions which will cause friction and unease.
Now, can someone give me a cuddle please before I cry.
Gem. x
Lists of people doing this that and the other would only serve to cause more splits and factions which will cause friction and unease.
Now, can someone give me a cuddle please before I cry.
Gem. x
Quote by RedHot
Both Dawn and Jags have offered to compile such a list, but it would appear that it would probably be done privately in conjunction with supplied lists of no-shows from munch organisers, if it gets to go ahead at all.
I've had one name put forward so far, I have no idea if Jags has received any pms on the matter.
My intention was that if the name cropped up 3 times, I would go an have a word with them and ask what the fLuck they are playing at. If I don't get a serious reply then I would pm the next munch organiser where the person has their name down to give them the option of sending out the invite or not
Sex God
Quote by little gem
cos when you organise something unless you know them personally always count on at least 2 out of 10 not coming.
But this is a bit more than that, 55 no-shows out of 90 is ...erm..61 per cent I think. That's a shockingly high proportion of no-shows and definitely serious enough to warrant some discussion.
Mike (who passed Maths O level after a long hard struggle)
Sorry Gem
Quote by Dawn_Mids
Both Dawn and Jags have offered to compile such a list, but it would appear that it would probably be done privately in conjunction with supplied lists of no-shows from munch organisers, if it gets to go ahead at all.
I've had one name put forward so far, I have no idea if Jags has received any pms on the matter.
My intention was that if the name cropped up 3 times, I would go an have a word with them and ask what the fLuck they are playing at. If I don't get a serious reply then I would pm the next munch organiser where the person has their name down to give them the option of sending out the invite or not
NOPE - had no names by PM but am happy to receive them if appropriate.
