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Posted this coz I have nothin better to do... sorry!

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"At bloody last"
I gasped under my breath, I allowed myself a silent punch in the air!
All us guys know that moment when the hunted prey, the object of your sole desires just lays there before you, your finally in command now!
My pole rested in my hands, long... black... unyielding...
For a fleeting few seconds panic sneaked up on me, :shock: my spine tingled, ego deflated, I adjusted the expression on my face to defiance, no way will doubt soil my furrowed brow...
I am the redpantherman this situation would not exist if I was not the man my reputation portrayed me to be!
With steely resilience I lent forward to penetrate my target.
I summoned forth horny images of conquests old & new to assist me with my lust for another notch on my post... a virtual pat on the back... the self gratifying feeling of 'your the daddy' biggrin
My jaded memory & intense desire or craving for self gratification suggested an image of wanton seduction & perverseness that I needed to execute my task....
That image has stood me in good stead in past missions & bought me thru my darkest moments of need.
It was...
...the image of Sassy-Seren in front of me on her hands & knees, that cute little ass was pumping back & forth hump sending mating signals & giving a hard on just about every bull elephant in the South West of England!
Heeeeey!!! :dry:
The wind was in the wrong direction!
I guess the planes of Africa missed out? dunno
Anyway... fortified with vim & vigor my pole trembled & flickered in my hands.
I placed it at the entrance to the hole,
I breathed a lustful sigh of pleasure,
This is what I have waited for... I wanted to savor that moment when the dance begins...
I pushed it in... no resistance! :shock: ...is it too late to back out?
Will I be denied en-stroke?
There was no change of heart... I had to carry on...
I pushed even harder, my pole disappeared!
Ahhhhhhhhhh.... I grasped harder this time.
A bead of sweat rolled its preordained path from my brow, down my cheeks, skimmed my beating naked chest & splashed silently on the object of my desire. :twisted:
My whole body braced with fire I pushed even harder now... my progress was unrelenting.
I was 'in the zone'
Suddenly everything slowed down around me... the very molecules of time existed within my own dimension!
I could pick & choose what I wanted,
I played with time the way I would a cheap jigsaw!
Hell fire!!!... Not even Neo in The Matrix dare not dream he could have it this good!
I was The Mac Daddy now! :bounce:
Man... I was on top of my game!
I ripped that hole up... I stabbed it good & proppa!
I span it round put it down & did it again!
I was in control!
I felt my pole bend... I knew it was in deep now!
I heard no protest... I haven't broken anything!
The image of Sassy-Seren's sexy arse made my whole world turn red!
O.M.G! :shock:
Is this it?
The last & final push?
My sinus's cleared... my ears popped my muscles rippled & spasmed as the adrenalin tore its way thru my nervous system
Sassy-Seren's damn fine sexy arse came thru for me one more time worship
My senses detected my surroundings returning turn back to their normal hues of green, yellow, purple & lilac.
The smell of Wisteria blissed my horse flared nostrils!
The eclectic pan drum beat of my maxed out heart subsided back to a mortal level.
My visual perception cleared & I was able to focus on the delight that blazed deep into my retinas as it lay before me...
Yeah baby!
Who's The Mac Pimping Daddy now????
I'm tenting big style baby!!!!
I have finally erected my tent in the garden! redface
I hope you lot are happy for me! :giggle:

rpm goes all camp at petes do... click here! :giggle:
MAJOR coffee meets monitor moment! rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
and there's me thinking I was the object of your wet dreams for a mo rolleyes
There is me thinking this should be in the story section lol
And then me thinking Sassy Seren is with RMP, and / or in his dreams :P
And it is all about putting a tent up!! what a let down :lol:
Quote by Sarah
There is me thinking this should be in the story section lol
And then me thinking Sassy Seren is with RMP, and / or in his dreams :P
And it is all about putting a tent up!! what a let down :lol:

It IS the closest he's got to having me on my hands and knees in the bushes though :giggle:
Now come on RPM admit it ... you just tented your trousers didnt ya rotflmao Great fantasy tho lol
On a more serious note, well done Red for sorting out your own erection. You won't be needing my help again in a few weeks then? wink
I thought you had gone down with man flu.
By 'eck, bracing stuff panther!
Something tells me I can learn from this man!!!
Havent read literature that good since 3rd form English!
I think its wise to have a practise before the main event..don't want to be stuck in a field wondering which bits go where.
very sensible RPM lol
Quote by varca
Please feel free to demonstrate your erection skills for me in June biggrin Tent dear, I meant tent... okay same thing :rascal:

It's better to show you from the INSIDE of your tent hunni :twisted:
I haven't got mine up yet
but it feels good knowing it's there
lp
:rolleyes:
Quote by Sassy-Seren
...It IS the closest he's got to having me on my hands and knees in the bushes though :giggle:
It will only take a few more inches to get any closer babe! :twisted:
I'm working on it! :wanker:
Quote by buckingfabe
...you just tented your trousers didnt ya...
:giggle: I wont be needing a tent pole then! biggrin
Quote by Sassy-Seren
...well done Red for sorting out your own erection. You won't be needing my help again in a few weeks then?
:shock: What about the saying 'many hands make light work'!?
Quote by duncanlondon
I thought you had gone down with man flu.
I was in a paracetamol haze... I very nearly saw the light! :cry:
Quote by Sexynorthwest
Havent read literature that good since 3rd form English!
Ahhhh the 3rd form... best days of my life
:twisted: Perving up the Science teacher Mrs D****'s skirt when she took us out on field trips! :P
Quote by varca
Please feel free to demonstrate your erection skills for me in June

Erection skills? confused
Will I needing a hard hat for that?
Quote by redpantherman
I thought you had gone down with man flu.
I was in a paracetamol haze... I very nearly saw the light! :cry:

paracetamol haze???it was the vodka!!!!!
and a dose of fresh air.... biggrin
Hey Red, Sassy showed me your fabulous epigram!
Firstly I'd like to compliment you on your compelling fluency of eloquence!
Secondly I can't help thinkig that you may have missed your vocation in life, you could write stories for jiz mag.s.... or even articles for a camping mag. ...or better still start your own publication that combines those 2 wonderful pleasures life holds!
Lastly I realise you have an eye for quality - yes, Sassy sure does have a fine arse, an asset I hope to exploit - keep an eye on our photos!
Hope to see you at the BBQ :cheers:
Dai
RPM, you really should try being just a tinsy bit more normal, I recommend it wink
pink x
Quote by blueandpink
RPM, you really should try being just a tinsy bit more normal, I recommend it wink
pink x

:shock:
Red??? NORMAL????? :scared:
If he was normal, I'd divorce him! :giggle:
Bah! evil
What chance do any of us other single guys have against RPM and his godalmighty 'pole' when he's in genius mode like he is on here!
I've decided to ignore this thread and not post on it so as not to bump it back up and draw any more attention to him. wink
Good thinking Niceandgentle- I'll do the same thing!
(please, don't call him a genius though! :rolleyes:
ON a serious note- I have no avatars, half me buttons are missing (quote etc) and I've got no emotes! Is anyone else having problems?
Quote by niceandgentle
Bah! evil
What chance do any of us other single guys have against RPM and his godalmighty 'pole' when he's in genius mode like he is on here!
I've decided to ignore this thread and not post on it so as not to bump it back up and draw any more att
ention to him. wink

why not just put up some nice pics
if u can`t beat him
join him...............
Quote by twos_company
Bah! evil
What chance do any of us other single guys have against RPM and his godalmighty 'pole' when he's in genius mode like he is on here!
I've decided to ignore this thread and not post on it so as not to bump it back up and draw any more att
ention to him. wink

why not just put up some nice pics
if u can`t beat him
join him...............
You have a point there but I don't know if any nice pics exsist of me lol! :wink:
Quote by winchwench
Good thinking Niceandgentle- I'll do the same thing!
(please, don't call him a genius though! :rolleyes:
ON a serious note- I have no avatars, half me buttons are missing (quote etc) and I've got no emotes! Is anyone else having problems?

Ok Winch I promise that I will not call the genius a genius lol wink