profile overload

16 Feb 2007

profile over load, do you ever find your self going through the motions of looking at profiles and clicking off them without really taking anything in, skimming through the imediate questions you need answering, are they Bi , where are they from, how old, quick zap at the gallery and onto the next person,
Rose turned to me and said whats wrong with them, i hadnt a clue, couldnt even recall the user name, or anything about them,
it is 5,30 so i have an excuse but if the truths known this happens all the while,read too many i think , they are all starting to melt into one huge person....
staggy

16 Feb 2007

Quote by wild rose and the stag
they are all starting to melt into one huge person....
staggy

:shock: that's quite a scary thought!!! :shock:
was having a *profile conversation* the other day, I rarely look at profiles these days.. not as a matter of course anyway... (strangely enough, I feel as if I'm intruding, or being rude, dont aske me why, it's daft I know!) ... but have to admit, in days of yore when I would have looked a little more, a few key-words in a profile would let me know what I wanted to know >usually that they wouldnt be intertested in me redface

< and I'd move along the bus...
I'm a fine one to talk though... over recent months, Ive been trying to think of a way to get my own *point* across through the profile, and the result has been that it becomes less & less informative or interesting... more of a punctuation mark in this *one huge person*, than a bold, attention grabbing statement.
bgga!
lp

16 Feb 2007

wewent for honesty and have been told its not the best policy, change it staggy to straight , mentioning bi puts lots of couples off, dont tell people you dont full swap it puts people off, dont make your profile so long it puts people off, if im going to have sex through this site I want to know as much about someone as possible, before i spend god knows how long on msn arranging that first meet, trying to get past all the single bi fem bobs as we call them to the real single bi fems, or the couples with that are just that till you say pop your web cam on next time your both there so we can just see you are both genuinly interested..
if i didnt want all that info id have sex at a club in a dark room, so trolling the profiles is a must, we dont use the forums here much these days, so forum friendships have somewhat disappeared, on sh anyway, never was too keen on having sex with people off the forums anyway, dont know why....
just a pointer, from a personal point of view, things we dislike and get the imediate click off on a profile, no pics( body showing general build) or no text, saying just a bit about what you are looking for...
oh god yes and where the hell you are, i hate it when people have profiles that dont tell me if they are in spain or stafford....
rambling now cos i still cant sleep
staggy
xx

16 Feb 2007

One of the most annoying things I've found with profiles is that its sometimes what you put IN them that others tend to ignore thats annoying. For instance, ours says no winks and no single guys under 30 - the other day a 22 year old guy sent a wink ffs rolleyes

As for the more intimate details such as being bi, we've discussed that in the past and whether it puts people off. In the end, we decided to be totally upfront and honest about what we are, and what we're looking for - if its not what someone else wants then so be it smile

We've played with many straight guys and couples, either of us being bi doesn't mean we're gonna jump on a guy or fem when they don't want it lol.
Have to say though, the profile system is generally a good way to find what you're looking for - especially when people have taken the time to fill in the text area with more detailed info, and maybe put in a piccy or 2 :)
Staggy, as for the honesty bit - its the only way to be my friend, keep it as it is. Its the only way to meet people who are genuinely compatible, and meet your criteria :) Those that don't meet you don't know what they're missing wink

16 Feb 2007

one thing i find annoying in profiles which is nobodys fault is the little bit about location. i'm guessing this is worked out by a gps system. i live on the north east coast of kent & often see someone is only 35 miles away or something, but recognise the postcode as being essex. yes they are only that distance in a straight line, in reality its a round trip to the dartford tunnel then a parellel run back the other side, more like 135 miles in total. could location info not include a county without giving too much away? sorry about the whinge, just a personal thing & no offence to anyone intended.(ducks to avoid anticipated flack)

16 Feb 2007

Quote by wild rose and the stag
wewent for honesty and have been told its not the best policy, change it staggy to straight , mentioning bi puts lots of couples off, dont tell people you dont full swap it puts people off, dont make your profile so long it puts people off...

:shock: Staggy, I'd agree with you - you put in your profile what's important to you - so bollox to putting people off! if they're put off, they're not right for you in the first place, surely?

if i didnt want all that info id have sex at a club in a dark room, so trolling the profiles is a must.

:thumbup:

we dont use the forums here much these days, so forum friendships have somewhat disappeared, on sh anyway

:sad:

16 Feb 2007

Hey there,
Both hubby and I are very new to this. When we have been reviewing profiles we do appreciate the information that is on there, as it helps us to establish whether or not we are compatible with a potential couple. We have contacted a few couples now, and are very very (fingers crossed) close to arranging our first meet.
We believe if you are truthful from the outset, you are less likely to get hurt. biggrin

we have maintained that we will always be open and honest with who ever we meet. What could be better?
lol

16 Feb 2007

wewent for honesty and have been told its not the best policy, change it staggy to straight , mentioning bi puts lots of couples off, dont tell people you dont full swap it puts people off, dont make your profile so long it puts people off, if im going to have sex through this site I want to know as much about someone as possible, before i spend god knows how long on msn arranging that first meet, trying to get past all the single bi fem bobs as we call them to the real single bi fems, or the couples with that are just that till you say pop your web cam on next time your both there so we can just see you are both genuinly interested..
if i didnt want all that info id have sex at a club in a dark room, so trolling the profiles is a must, we dont use the forums here much these days, so forum friendships have somewhat disappeared, on sh anyway, never was too keen on having sex with people off the forums anyway, dont know why....
just a pointer, from a personal point of view, things we dislike and get the imediate click off on a profile, no pics( body showing general build) or no text, saying just a bit about what you are looking for...
oh god yes and where the hell you are, i hate it when people have profiles that dont tell me if they are in spain or stafford....
I would far rather know up front all i need to know so i can save wasting my and their time.
in the lesbian world where most people are liars or economical with the truth, the deceptions can range from not telling you they smoke right through the oh didnt i tell u i had kids to im still living with my ex and hes given me permission to play cos our marriage is on the rocks.
Had i read any of that on a profile i wouldnt have messaged them. as it is, ive now been lied to and i dont care if your miss gay world, your not my type cos i cant trust you.

16 Feb 2007

Quote by Geminifemale
..in the lesbian world where most people are liars or economical with the truth..

I really wish you would stop coming out with insulting rubbish like this! confused

16 Feb 2007

Quote by Worthingtons
Hey there,
Both hubby and I are very new to this. When we have been reviewing profiles we do appreciate the information that is on there, as it helps us to establish whether or not we are compatible with a potential couple. We have contacted a few couples now, and are very very (fingers crossed) close to arranging our first meet.
We believe if you are truthful from the outset, you are less likely to get hurt. we have maintained that we will always be open and honest with who ever we meet. What could be better?

I have to agree with this :thumbup:
oh :welcome: to the site by the way :cheers:
lets be honest, writing a decent profile is harder for some than it is for others.
I spent ages on revamping mine recently and it still turned out c**p rolleyes

for me my profile / ad is my advertising space, it's where i get to put myself forward in the hope of attracting the kind of person / people with whom i'd be happy to spend some time and have some fun.
So honesty has to be the only way to go. OK some people may not like it, but then as has already been said, its just as well they know straight away, and so waste no PM's etc.
I have also heard one or two people complain that some ads / profiles are too long redface

guilty as charged methinks, but when, like mine, your descriptive skills leave a little to be desired, you really should try and say as much about yourself as possible to give others a feel of what your about, in my book there is nothing worse than hitting a profile that has no ad, and tells you bugger all about the person. imho.
:shock:
see, I'm doing it again, running off at the keyboard :roll:
:gagged:

16 Feb 2007

Kiss, maybe where you go the scene is no so aggressive or insestuous, but im my vast experience, lesbians are predominantly time wasting, predatory, egotistical neurotic women with gender identity issues.
Its one long round of dramas, lets see how many of my ex's i can win back just to hurt and humiliate my current partner, etc.
The majority of women on gaydargirls will not either show a pic, have a phone conversation or cam to prove their identity. Ive become an ace detective weeding out the liars over the yrs to the point where ive had a lpng hard look at who i think i am, cos if they are lesbians then im not.
Im a straight woman who is attracted to women. i dont identify with the mind games and general behaviour catagory most of them fall into.
Kiss, if this offends you then please accept my appologies, its not a flame or designed to do so in any way. Im purely speaking as i have found, and maybe ive found the wrong bunch of women , but its what ive observed and had first hand experience of.
Over the years i must have chatted to many many hundreds or women, many of whom i would have liked to meet, but i never make the first move, just in case my judgment has been worng, and when they suggest meeting im usually up for it. Yet ive only met a small percentage. Most have stood me up with the most mind blowing array of excuses you could ever imagain.
My conclusion is as above.
im gonna regret posting this im sure and not cos its not true, but cos you wont accept its my point of view, to which im entitled

16 Feb 2007

I used to think that profiles were enough to go on..now that I spend more time in the chatrooms I actually go more on what is said in the chatroom and how the person interacts in there.
the only time I look at profiles is to see how far from me they are.
and if I thought that a particular group of people behaved in a certain way I think that I would stay away from them. Or look to see why I attracted people who consistantly behaved in a way that I didn't like.
rolleyes

16 Feb 2007

Quote by Geminifemale
Kiss, maybe where you go the scene is no so aggressive or insestuous, but im my vast experience, lesbians are predominantly time wasting, predatory, egotistical neurotic women with gender identity issues.
Its one long round of dramas, lets see how many of my ex's i can win back just to hurt and humiliate my current partner, etc.
The majority of women on gaydargirls will not either show a pic, have a phone conversation or cam to prove their identity. Ive become an ace detective weeding out the liars over the yrs to the point where ive had a lpng hard look at who i think i am, cos if they are lesbians then im not.
Im a straight woman who is attracted to women. i dont identify with the mind games and general behaviour catagory most of them fall into.
Kiss, if this offends you then please accept my appologies, its not a flame or designed to do so in any way. Im purely speaking as i have found, and maybe ive found the wrong bunch of women , but its what ive observed and had first hand experience of.
Over the years i must have chatted to many many hundreds or women, many of whom i would have liked to meet, but i never make the first move, just in case my judgment has been worng, and when they suggest meeting im usually up for it. Yet ive only met a small percentage. Most have stood me up with the most mind blowing array of excuses you could ever imagain.
My conclusion is as above.
im gonna regret posting this im sure and not cos its not true, but cos you wont accept its my point of view, to which im entitled

You are more than entitled to your opinion, as long as you appreciate it's just that - your opinion and not fact.
To slag off an entire part of our society like you have done is totally unfair. Yes you may have had some bad experiences but you can't tar everyone with the same brush.

16 Feb 2007

Kiss, please if you read my post, i never say ALL or EVERYONE
but i do say, majority, most, some etc
Sure i hope i have met all the fuckwits in one place and so now i can look forward to meeting the real nice peeps on here.
Birds of a feather and all that............ im building up a group of genuine nice honest good sociable people on here and im comfortable and very happy with that.
The concept of swinging is new to me, it certainly raises a lot of questions and the psychology of how and why it works fascinates me. But im learning there is a lot more openess, love and honesty between swinging partners than you might generally find in the vanilly world, and that has to be a good thing.

16 Feb 2007

To Staggy
Why do you feel you have to lie and change your profile? or have I read that wrong? If you are Bi you are Bi simple as, if someone is put off by that then that's their perogative.
If you are randomly looking at profiles and they are all becoming a blur may I suggest you are not really interested at that moment in time? When we're looking seriously for new meets we spend a good few hours going through profiles and reading their likes and dislikes. I would hate to contact someone having not read their profile properly to then have to turn round and say "whoops, sorry".
To Gemini
Why do you live in a "lesbian world"? Do you not actually live in a world where there are lesbian's, gay men, straight people, dogs and cats? :shock:
You really must get rid of this chip on your shoulder and chill out.

16 Feb 2007

Quote by jaymar
Why do you live in a "lesbian world"? Do you not actually live in a world where there are lesbian's, gay men, straight people, dogs and cats? :shock:

Was thinking that myself. The things you've explained aren't restricted to just the lesbian community - it goes right across the board, whatever your gender, colour, height, weight, beliefs.
Although I wouldn't say that it was the majority, or most or practically everyone that are liars/timewasters etc........ just a few wink

Bluddy annoying when you do come across em tho!! evil

But worth it for the absolute gems that are on the site :inlove:

16 Feb 2007

Quote by jaymar
To Staggy
Why do you feel you have to lie and change your profile? or have I read that wrong? If you are Bi you are Bi simple as, if someone is put off by that then that's their perogative.
If you are randomly looking at profiles and they are all becoming a blur may I suggest you are not really interested at that moment in time? When we're looking seriously for new meets we spend a good few hours going through profiles and reading their likes and dislikes. I would hate to contact someone having not read their profile properly to then have to turn round and say "whoops, sorry".
.

your right Jaymar , in the first instance about me changing my profile to an untruth, you did read it wrong, as i said later we have gone for honesty..i was merely stating what others had suggested we do..
and in the second instance, where did i say i was "randomly " looking at profiles, we dont randomly look at profiles , further more we dont read profiles for fun, we see people in chat and take things from there, its not random i can assure you and its certainly not because we arent interested at this point in time,,, if we werent interested we wouldnt be checking profiles out what would be the point in that, maybe for some just for the hell of it or to perve as its often described, we dont do perving, we do searching, the first post on this thread was just a light hearted comment at the way it gets for us at times, the thread has developed into something far more interesting thankfully, having read it now its been quite enlightening at times..

16 Feb 2007

Quote by wild rose and the stag
To Staggy
Why do you feel you have to lie and change your profile? or have I read that wrong? If you are Bi you are Bi simple as, if someone is put off by that then that's their perogative.
If you are randomly looking at profiles and they are all becoming a blur may I suggest you are not really interested at that moment in time? When we're looking seriously for new meets we spend a good few hours going through profiles and reading their likes and dislikes. I would hate to contact someone having not read their profile properly to then have to turn round and say "whoops, sorry".
.

your right Jaymar , in the first instance about me changing my profile to an untruth, you did read it wrong, as i said later we have gone for honesty..i was merely stating what others had suggested we do..

aaaah

and in the second instance, where did i say i was "randomly " looking at profiles, we dont randomly look at profiles , further more we dont read profiles for fun, we see people in chat and take things from there, its not random i can assure you and its certainly not because we arent interested at this point in time,,, if we werent interested we wouldnt be checking profiles out what would be the point in that, maybe for some just for the hell of it or to perve as its often described, we dont do perving, we do searching, the first post on this thread was just a light hearted comment at the way it gets for us at times, the thread has developed into something far more interesting thankfully, having read it now its been quite enlightening at times..

You didn't say randomly, I had said " you are randomly" meaning just that and that was why they were all becoming a blur.
wink

16 Feb 2007

Quote by Geminifemale
im gonna regret posting this im sure and not cos its not true, but cos you wont accept its my point of view, to which im entitled

Quote by jaymar
To Gemini
Why do you live in a "lesbian world"? Do you not actually live in a world where there are lesbian's, gay men, straight people, dogs and cats? :shock:
You really must get rid of this chip on your shoulder and chill out.

Group hug anyone confused

:?

16 Feb 2007

I sometimes find myself looking through the gallery at the pictures and actually recognising them because ive looked at thier profiles before, i never have any memory of the profile itself, just of certain body parts.....Somebody shoot me

16 Feb 2007

Quote by the_Laird
im gonna regret posting this im sure and not cos its not true, but cos you wont accept its my point of view, to which im entitled

Quote by jaymar
To Gemini
Why do you live in a "lesbian world"? Do you not actually live in a world where there are lesbian's, gay men, straight people, dogs and cats? :shock:
You really must get rid of this chip on your shoulder and chill out.

Group hug anyone confused

:?
erm top one was in relation to something Gem and Kiss were discussing, my bit was in relation to a general critiscm of the "lesbian world" ... but because it's you, I'll enter the hugging .. just this once, I hate hugs I just hate them! lol

17 Feb 2007

Quote by Missy
Why do you live in a "lesbian world"? Do you not actually live in a world where there are lesbian's, gay men, straight people, dogs and cats? :shock:

Was thinking that myself. The things you've explained aren't restricted to just the lesbian community - it goes right across the board, whatever your gender, colour, height, weight, beliefs.
Although I wouldn't say that it was the majority, or most or practically everyone that are liars/timewasters etc........ just a few wink

Bluddy annoying when you do come across em tho!! evil

But worth it for the absolute gems that are on the site :inlove:
And if anyone did make comments in that vein about black/fat/whatever, they would be 'isms' and unacceptable. confused

17 Feb 2007

Quote by Freckledbird
Why do you live in a "lesbian world"? Do you not actually live in a world where there are lesbian's, gay men, straight people, dogs and cats? :shock:

Was thinking that myself. The things you've explained aren't restricted to just the lesbian community - it goes right across the board, whatever your gender, colour, height, weight, beliefs.
Although I wouldn't say that it was the majority, or most or practically everyone that are liars/timewasters etc........ just a few wink

Bluddy annoying when you do come across em tho!! evil

But worth it for the absolute gems that are on the site :inlove:
And if anyone did make comments in that vein about black/fat/whatever, they would be 'isms' and unacceptable. confused

They didn't, it was an set to on words between two people about living in "a lesbian world" which I disagreed with as per comments further up. Missy was agreeing with me but added on bits about colour etc. Noone should be secluded to a certain world was my thoughts.
smile