This subjects reminded me of an amusing story my friend told me yrs ago about when she had her daughter and he 3yr old son had asked if she'd bought the baby at a shop.
She carefully explained to her son that his little sister had been living in her tummy for a while and she'd been to hospital because his little sister wanted to come out. He obviously asked how she got her out so again she tried to explain in simple terms that mummy had a hole between her legs and thats where the baby came out of. He seemed happy with this and nothing more was said.
About a week later they took the baby on her first outing (the supermarket) and were stopped by a lady who cooed and aahhhed over the baby for a few moments then turned to her little boy and said "my aren't you lucky to have a little sister brought by the stork" he looked at her as though she was stupid and said "a stork didn't bring her she came from up there" at which point he lifted his mums skirt high in the air for all to see! :shock:
She'd never been so embarrassed.. just goes to show what knowledge can do LOL :grin:
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Sex education for children in school
I find it stange that when I was at school in the 70's we had no sex education at all. We also had very few teenage pregnancies and std's amongst teenagers but now when they seem to have more sex education teenage pregnancies and std's amongst the teenage population are growing. I can't work it out. 
Perhaps it is a reflection of the sexually repressed psyche in this country that manifests it self with the kind of daily reports of sex crimes, etc that our european cousins in general do not see, or have the problem with to the same degree as in the uk.
Europeans have a much more liberal, and open view of sex in their societys,and consequently less sex crimes.
Hopefully this will continue to be addressed,and not brushed under the carpet.
cc_7up
Europeans have a much more liberal, and open view of sex in their societys,and consequently less sex crimes.
Hopefully this will continue to be addressed,and not brushed under the carpet.
cc_7up
Quote by cc_7up
Perhaps it is a reflection of the sexually repressed psyche in this country that manifests it self with the kind of daily reports of sex crimes, etc that our european cousins in general do not see, or have the problem with to the same degree as in the uk.
Europeans have a much more liberal, and open view of sex in their societys,and consequently less sex crimes.
Hopefully this will continue to be addressed,and not brushed under the carpet.
cc_7up
Lets hope so but with our sex obsessed media I doubt it :cry:
Do you think that maybe there were lot of pregnancies and disease but it didn't get spoken about? Didn't pregnant girls used to get sent away or forced to terminate or put babies up for adoption? A few of my mum's friends have stories like that. I think the phenomenon of the teenage pregnancy is kind os unusual in this country as a lot of them are planned for benefits/housing to get out of home (as I saw a bit in my school).
Quote by poniella
Do you think that maybe there were lot of pregnancies and disease but it didn't get spoken about? Didn't pregnant girls used to get sent away or forced to terminate or put babies up for adoption? A few of my mum's friends have stories like that. I think the phenomenon of the teenage pregnancy is kind os unusual in this country as a lot of them are planned for benefits/housing to get out of home (as I saw a bit in my school).
I think you have a point about these things not being spoken about but I just remember being very scared about getting anyone pregnant or catching an unmentionable diseases. I think people took more precautions or just didn't do it. If you ended up getting anyone pregnant you would end up a social outcast and this was in the seventies. In my parents day it was worse. My mother had a friend who died after a back street abortion all very sad.
I do think that the young are subject to more pressures than I was. Sex seems to be everywhere and I am obviously no purde
I think there is a loss of innocense somewhere in this world. 
Sex God
I can see this from the point of view of both parent and teacher.
When my kids were younger (and still), Chris and I have answered any questions as the kids asked them, until they were satisfied with the answers we gave. As someone else has already said, 'old enough to ask, old enough to know'. They see us kissing/cuddling and know that we do more than that but they don't see it as unhealthy and they aren't too embarrassed about it (we are, however, far too old to be having sex
). The sex and relationship education they received was from another person and simply enhanced what we'd told them.
As a teacher, I know that my current year 5's have had S & R education as part of a 'growing up' programme and the year 6's will be having a review of the programme soon. This does work, particularly for those children who live with only one parent and find it difficult to talk to the one they live with. If any of my class ask me questions, I answer them as honestly as I can, without giving too much detail.
I do think that 3 is very young to be asking/answering any more than the most basic questions. Three is a little old to be still not potty trained though.
When my kids were younger (and still), Chris and I have answered any questions as the kids asked them, until they were satisfied with the answers we gave. As someone else has already said, 'old enough to ask, old enough to know'. They see us kissing/cuddling and know that we do more than that but they don't see it as unhealthy and they aren't too embarrassed about it (we are, however, far too old to be having sex
). The sex and relationship education they received was from another person and simply enhanced what we'd told them.As a teacher, I know that my current year 5's have had S & R education as part of a 'growing up' programme and the year 6's will be having a review of the programme soon. This does work, particularly for those children who live with only one parent and find it difficult to talk to the one they live with. If any of my class ask me questions, I answer them as honestly as I can, without giving too much detail.
I do think that 3 is very young to be asking/answering any more than the most basic questions. Three is a little old to be still not potty trained though.
Sexpert
I agree - what can they really understand about it all (not just the act) at 3yrs? Sure you can explain around that age, if they can grasp it, that when a man and a woman are in love they have ways of expressing that love and that babies can result from it, and about them growing/being born inside the woman, but I think they need to be able to understand enough that they don't go embarassing everyone by asking silly questions to random men and woman they see together about it.
I wouldn't dare have asked either of my parents about sex and they never assumed we knew or mentioned it in conversation until well after we'd become familiar with it all. My mum (a bit prudish) bought us a book (An Usborne one about growing up) when I was about 10 and it ended up on the normal bookshelf, I used to go and read it in secret to find out about things that my friends had spoken of. It was quite good for what it was about but didn't show how sex really worked or teach any slang (would have been handy for playground conversations). Breasts and the extra body hair were "secondary sexual features" in that book!
I learnt an awful lot of the rest through friends, and one very vivid memory of time spent off school ill, sat at home all wrapped up in front of the TV. The daytime schools programming included a show about the life process of mammals with a section on mating, leading on to human mating. Very scientific but at least I could finally confirm how I thought it all went. All entirely by accident, so god knows how long it would have taken otherwise.
We'd actually been told how babies start from the point of post-conception onwards from a very early age (a Q we asked while on holiday once as parents were thinking of having another baby), but it never ocurred to us to ask how the sperm got to the egg or where it came from in my dad.
When I have kids, I think I'm going to wait until they're grown up enough to start finding girls interesting and then see if I can prompt some questions or start the conversation. We never got asked about that side of our lives. Maybe they wanted to give us privacy, but I never had any encouragement or help when I could have really used it - was wayyyy too shy back then. I like to think I've got over (most) of that now.
Maybe not tell them everything in one go, perhaps leave the details of the more unusual activities for them to find out or ask about later. Wouldn't want to scare them at such an early stage. There's also the period (no pun intended) where they know about it and think "eurgh that's disgusting" that might be a risky time.
I wouldn't dare have asked either of my parents about sex and they never assumed we knew or mentioned it in conversation until well after we'd become familiar with it all. My mum (a bit prudish) bought us a book (An Usborne one about growing up) when I was about 10 and it ended up on the normal bookshelf, I used to go and read it in secret to find out about things that my friends had spoken of. It was quite good for what it was about but didn't show how sex really worked or teach any slang (would have been handy for playground conversations). Breasts and the extra body hair were "secondary sexual features" in that book!
I learnt an awful lot of the rest through friends, and one very vivid memory of time spent off school ill, sat at home all wrapped up in front of the TV. The daytime schools programming included a show about the life process of mammals with a section on mating, leading on to human mating. Very scientific but at least I could finally confirm how I thought it all went. All entirely by accident, so god knows how long it would have taken otherwise.
We'd actually been told how babies start from the point of post-conception onwards from a very early age (a Q we asked while on holiday once as parents were thinking of having another baby), but it never ocurred to us to ask how the sperm got to the egg or where it came from in my dad.
When I have kids, I think I'm going to wait until they're grown up enough to start finding girls interesting and then see if I can prompt some questions or start the conversation. We never got asked about that side of our lives. Maybe they wanted to give us privacy, but I never had any encouragement or help when I could have really used it - was wayyyy too shy back then. I like to think I've got over (most) of that now.
Maybe not tell them everything in one go, perhaps leave the details of the more unusual activities for them to find out or ask about later. Wouldn't want to scare them at such an early stage. There's also the period (no pun intended) where they know about it and think "eurgh that's disgusting" that might be a risky time.
Sex God
Well,
I am STILL waiting for the talk from my parents about the birds and the bees!
Jeez I wish they would get a move on…. I have SOOOO much catching up to do!
I have never been into all the euphemisms that are used when children ask questions.
Why tell your child that a baby is delivered by a bird… why not just explain to them the truth in a way they can understand.
I remember being told babies were made by a seed bought from the pet shop……. Can you imagine the trauma I went through every time I ate a bowl of muesli?
My child knows the basics, enough to answer the questions that have been asked up to now.
Some of those questions were asked at a VERY young age.. but they still got truthful answers.
I think there is never too young an age to tell your child the truth, but there is DEF too old an age.
I am STILL waiting for the talk from my parents about the birds and the bees!
Jeez I wish they would get a move on…. I have SOOOO much catching up to do!
I have never been into all the euphemisms that are used when children ask questions.
Why tell your child that a baby is delivered by a bird… why not just explain to them the truth in a way they can understand.
I remember being told babies were made by a seed bought from the pet shop……. Can you imagine the trauma I went through every time I ate a bowl of muesli?
My child knows the basics, enough to answer the questions that have been asked up to now.
Some of those questions were asked at a VERY young age.. but they still got truthful answers.
I think there is never too young an age to tell your child the truth, but there is DEF too old an age.
i think its all down to individuals to decide when their children are taught about sex education, but it must be taught, there is no use in sweeping it under the carpet and hoping it will go away. all children are at very different levels of understanding regardless of their age so it cannot be left to someone else to teach your child just because it can cause a few squirming moments of wishing the ground would open up and swallow you whole 
. but i think that it shouldn't be done all at once either because too much information can be as dangerous as not enough. by the way i haven't had to answer any ?'s yet cos all my son's interested in is when's spongebob bleedin squarepants next on. :doh: but i hope that i can answer as truthfully as possible when he does without scaring the hell out of him
. but i think that it shouldn't be done all at once either because too much information can be as dangerous as not enough. by the way i haven't had to answer any ?'s yet cos all my son's interested in is when's spongebob bleedin squarepants next on. :doh: but i hope that i can answer as truthfully as possible when he does without scaring the hell out of him I think the really worrying thing actually is that my mum never told me anything because she actually doesn't know anything. She has lsept with so many guys, before and during her marriage (and adter) and proudly said to me when i was about 12 that she'd never used any contraception :shock:
She is also very prejudiced against HIV because she has no idea you get it from just having sex, like she does. I've been having the dilemme recently of knowing that some one is oging to have to talk to her about safe sex (as a matter of urgency) but I think she'll be seriously offended if I try.
I hear it's a social issue now that 50+ women who have got divorced are badly in need of sex education.
She is also very prejudiced against HIV because she has no idea you get it from just having sex, like she does. I've been having the dilemme recently of knowing that some one is oging to have to talk to her about safe sex (as a matter of urgency) but I think she'll be seriously offended if I try.
I hear it's a social issue now that 50+ women who have got divorced are badly in need of sex education.
Our daughter, aged 9, knows how babies are born. She will sometimes watch the documentaries on telly showing babies being born and asks questions which we answer truthfully but with not TOO much detail.
She's on the verge of asking how a baby gets in there in the first place, so I'm ready for that question popping up any time soon! I've also had to put her right about some "myths" that she's come out with from listening to school friends.
She's only recently shown any interest in asking such questions and we've waited until she approaches us first although by a certain age if a child hasn't asked anything about sex I think its important to tell them the details, probably as a guide by the time they go to high school.
Our son, aged 6, shows no interest whatsoever in asking anything sex related and would rather just shoot me from his hiding place behind the settee as I unsuspectingly walk past :shock:
This question, from our daughter, I found a bit surprising that she asked................
"Mum why do men want to have an operation to become a woman?"
Just shows that you never really realise how much is going on in their head!
Fee
XX
She's on the verge of asking how a baby gets in there in the first place, so I'm ready for that question popping up any time soon! I've also had to put her right about some "myths" that she's come out with from listening to school friends.
She's only recently shown any interest in asking such questions and we've waited until she approaches us first although by a certain age if a child hasn't asked anything about sex I think its important to tell them the details, probably as a guide by the time they go to high school.
Our son, aged 6, shows no interest whatsoever in asking anything sex related and would rather just shoot me from his hiding place behind the settee as I unsuspectingly walk past :shock:
This question, from our daughter, I found a bit surprising that she asked................
"Mum why do men want to have an operation to become a woman?"
Just shows that you never really realise how much is going on in their head!
Fee
XX