is swinging not defined as "sex as a recreational pastime" then? or is it anything that is not monogomous? im uncertain on the definition of the term "swinging"
the urban dictionary says this
"1. Swinging
A lifestyle of non-monogany where sexual relations occur outside the established couple. Swingers tend to refrain from romantic attachments with their outside partners, thus differentiating themselves from PolyAmorists. There is some overlap between the two communities, though the closeness of the comparisons are generally not acknowledged.
Swingers often engage in the activity as a couple. "Swing Parties" are venues where the activity may occur."
yes i also have a dictionary and i did put in my post that i was refering to people using SH as a SEX site. You can get as deep and meanigfull as you like, use thesaurus, dictionary and Google to define the "Term" Swinging, but a dictionary will not tell you what swinging is, or what it means to each individual. Come on i dont want to insult your intelligence, your obviously not a simpleton, but a dictionary also gives a useable reference term for the "word" happiness, does it tell you what happiness is or feels like? No it doesn't, i think, as i put in my original thread, you have misread or misrepresented my views.
yeah but thats the problem......swinging is a different thing to everybody. all you can hope to do is hope to find people on your own wavelength on here and disregard the chancers with different intentions to your own. i kind of know where your coming from because im here to chat and hopefully make a few freinds rather than just get laid.
no need to apologise. your right it is good to bounce ideas around with someone
without it turning nasty or taking personal offence when there is disagreement. you seem a level headed fella to me to. i am the type to weigh up other alternatives to a discussion and play the devils advocat sometimes. nice to get in a chat with you steanrach! i guess your the "ste" half?
yes rach is not a frequent user now, she has "differed" to another camp. i stick around hoping that things improve and the SH towers will once again get back to some old former glory.
It is sad to see people have turned against each other on here, i hope the site gets it old sparkle back!! :shock:
steanrachy, I read your post with interest.
We are new to this site, but not new to the scene and have "defected" from other sites in the hope of finding that utopian dream we have. The rise of the internet has made this community far more public than it used to be and the larger audience has produced a huge influx of those that now wish to be involved. Consequently the diversity of goals seems to be immense. Bizarrely, what we have learnt most is good old fashioned patience and tolerance.
On a plus point, in theory, as the community grows so does the number of suitable people.
I don't think there's a neat definition for what we all do or would like to do but i'm sure we'll have a better chance of finding it on here than on many other places.
Thanks....
trust us when we say we're VERY thick skinned. We are very used to being the target from either those that can't read, or those that naturally assume that what is ok for them will be ok for us.
This is a sport with no well defined rules but it's so much fun to get the bat out.
:thumbup:
Steanrachy; I know exactly what you mean. That's why you don't see me on here much anymore. It's like a different animal altogether. The comradery is gone. I posted a couple of things thinking people would like them, and they just got slated/ or I got hounded to the point that I can't be arsed doing anything which I consider to be nice for anyone anymore. In fact, I'm wondering why I'm bothering to post this note...
Just thought I would put my penny worth into this post. Although you didn't want to directly name the person due to protocol etc (although you did sadly enough tell people how to find out), I am the "idiot" who posted what you have talked about. As I explained in my reply, I was referring to my experience of the whole swinging scene in the north east rather than your assumption that it was this site or that post. I think when quoting people and ratifying someone who wich you know absolutely nothing about you really should get your facts right instead of twisting them to sound worse than they were.
I'm presuming it's your Psychology PHD is making you jump to assumptions and pigeon holing people you know nothing about which is what a lot of Psychologists do. Another example is saying to easyease "I'm sure you're not a simpleton". I think what you are wanting is to live in a world where everyone thinks the same as you and agrees to your idealistic opinions. We live in a world of fact not fiction. I am actually a very intellegent, youngish guy with 2 degrees of my own, a lot of friends and without saying I'm the best looking guy in the world, don't need this site for a quick shag as I could get one quite easily somewhere else. It's people like you who deter (or even intimidate weaker) newbies and give the impression that you have to be in the "click" to fit in on this site. You already stated on the post what you thought of it but still thought you had to bring more attention to it. To me it looks like you were either a school yard bully or were bully and you are wanting to seek retribution. This is by far my longest post but it's just dissappointing that I had to spend it trying to defend myself to someone on a higher pedastal. I really could go on for ages but will end me rant now as I would rather liaise with more decent folk who do not judge, jump to assumptions and can speak to people humanely.
I do try and be honest and fair and your post clearly made me realise that in your particular case i was wrong about you.
if you stick around a while im sure you will encounter what i was getting at, i, for some misguided reason, do try and HELP people on here and sometimes to do this you have to be a little shall we say direct!?
in the case of yourself though i think i unfairly judged you :shock: :shock: :shock:
On looking around I can already see what you are referring to. Many "young studs" may think they are in for an easy shag due to the age of someswingers and I do agree that they should be told that this is a community and not a brothel. :cheers: :thumbup:
I agree,this is a very thought provoking thread from all sides of opinion.
I think its a matter of perspective of who and what you always have each other,single women are,on the whole,spoilt for options.
As a truly single man life can bring me whatever it may bring me.I admit I use SH as a way to find people who like to meet with a view to sharing some kind of sexual element if all goes hardly a "quick shag" takes a good exchange of messages,phone calls and a meeting or meetings that go very well for things to proceed further,if ever,there is such a word as "No" after all,and it can be said on either side!
Clearly on the forum this expands to including the exchange of ideas with others,many others and can lead to purely social non-sexual meetings and friendships but surely there's nothing wrong with seeking a more sexually centred type of scene if thats what a person wishes,so long as there is clear communication and people are civil and respectful and can accept that which DOESN'T go their way as well as that what,hopefully,does!
going on, more of this 
around the NEast" 
:x :x :x 
:roll: :roll:
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
