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Stop Press......Neil sold as sex slave
Sex God
Quote by Kinky Lizard
The alcoholic ex-world gurning champion, 68, has already bought a king size double bed in anticipation of the steamy, passionate nights ahead.
Neil was unavailable for comment.
KinkyLizard
Now you know where I found neil and why he has to be auctioned off to the highest bidder! :P His comment lancashire tea making was a step too far!
The gentleman above said he was heart broken to be given "yorkshire tea" everyday and was sad to part company with him. :P
His final departing comment was that tea-totalling was never the same after he took neil as his kettle slave. :P
G. x ;)
Sex God
Pervert of the worst sort Kinky Lizard, of the worst sort ;)
Sex God
<<< tuts extremely feckin' loudly . . . >>>
if you two think i'm even steppin' foot in this bleedin' thread, well . . . .you've got another thing coming . . . and it won't be either of you i can tell yer!
i've heard of takin' the bleedin' piss, but that's a bridge too far!
<<< marches off whistling the colonel bogie tune . . . . >>>
neil x x x x ;)
if you two think i'm even steppin' foot in this bleedin' thread, well . . . .you've got another thing coming . . . and it won't be either of you i can tell yer!
i've heard of takin' the bleedin' piss, but that's a bridge too far!
<<< marches off whistling the colonel bogie tune . . . . >>>
neil x x x x ;)
Sex God
Quote by outdoorfun
I have a feeling that whoever ends up owning the ever fragrant but probably slightly worn Neil could get some of the investement back by hiring him out for a modest rate at satin's birthday party.
tkh
well terry, bit of a bidding war going on at the mo. i'm torn between the fin and a bubble, or the dried apple core and used tissue. we're thinking maybe a raffle would be fairer?
n x x x ;)
Sex God
As we are now into auction mode and I need something to give the dog to play with for christmas I will bid:-
one pair of celebrity eye glasses.......as worn by Jack Duckworth in episode 4086.
a padlock and hasp.......... surplus to requirements.
a 13amp plug..............minus the fuse.
a pine mug tree.
the hub caps from a Vauxhall Vectra.............as seen on crime watch.
a knitted shed .............as yet unfinished but due soon.
a signed photograph of an impression of big mal's little mal.
a demob suit..........double breasted in a worscester weave, 3 button cuff and turn ups.
one goat ..............answers to the name of clive.
one pair of celebrity eye glasses.......as worn by Jack Duckworth in episode 4086.
a padlock and hasp.......... surplus to requirements.
a 13amp plug..............minus the fuse.
a pine mug tree.
the hub caps from a Vauxhall Vectra.............as seen on crime watch.
a knitted shed .............as yet unfinished but due soon.
a signed photograph of an impression of big mal's little mal.
a demob suit..........double breasted in a worscester weave, 3 button cuff and turn ups.
one goat ..............answers to the name of clive.
Sex God
one pair of celebrity eye glasses.......as worn by Jack Duckworth in episode 4086.
now we're getting somewhere! you got one o' them authenticity certificate thingies to go with them dave? might be tempted there! dunno bout the shed? if it's owt like me mam's knitting it'll be found half finished in the bottom of the wardrobe in about 30 years time. i'm still waiting for the sleeves on me romper suit mate. and you best keep the hubcaps. not only is it receiving stolen goods, i reckon steve might ban me. and i ain't got a car let alone a bloody vectra. i mean who'd have a vectra, let alone nick the wheel trims off it? barmy!
neil x x x ;)
