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Terminology sought

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Warming the Bed
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I'm curious, hence the name
A bi-male is obviously interested in sex with men and women, but what if someone was only interested in part of the male-male scene.
A bloke who only wanted to recieve oral from a woman would be called selfish, but is that the case with a bloke when talking about blokes... when the receiving bit takes on a whole new meaning?
Is there a special term for a man who only wants to play the "male role" so to speak?
APOLOGIES IN ADVANCE if this way of putting it offends any gay/bi men (or anyone else for that matter)
Sex God
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Is something we often come back to on here, isn't it?
R and I like to play with others - (no, really, we do) but we neither of us entertain any kind of anal play. Now as a bi guy, R likes to give and receive oral with other guys, but no anal.
Some chaps would be happy to bugger and be buggered, but refuse point blank to kiss, let alone snog, another man.
I think you have to give yourself up to the fact that lables are for jars and not people and just enjoy what you wanna do. However, when discussing your ground rules, you just have to spell it out, as there is not sufficient vocabulary available to allow you to 'beat around the bush'.
I am sure it would be easier to say "I am a zooglesnoff" and mean "My sexual preferences are X on Tuesdays and Y on Thursdays, but the rest of the week I am Z" But zoog's know that no-one else would understand their terminology, so they have to go for the big explaination.
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*waits for the word 'zooglesnoff to appear in the updated version of the Oxford English dictionary* lol
Sex God
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I would like to know what a zooglesnoffs preferences are because I am debating my sexuality! lol
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My sexual preferences are X on Tuesdays and Y on Thursdays, but the rest of the week I am Z"

MQ read it ffs, that explains it all rolleyes lol
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Quote by Perforated_cat
I'm curious, hence the name
A bi-male is obviously interested in sex with men and women, but what if someone was only interested in part of the male-male scene.
A bloke who only wanted to recieve oral from a woman would be called selfish, but is that the case with a bloke when talking about blokes... when the receiving bit takes on a whole new meaning?
Is there a special term for a man who only wants to play the "male role" so to speak?
APOLOGIES IN ADVANCE if this way of putting it offends any gay/bi men (or anyone else for that matter)

Hi Perforated_cat
Maybe the following will help.........
Active/Top....................is where a guy will only give anal
Vers(versatile)..............is where he likes both giving and receiving
Passive/Bottom............is where he will only take anal and not give it.
You will usually find that most bi men will perform oral on another, whilst some prefer to be active/versatile (happily giving and receiving oral but only giving anal and not receiving it)
Lots are just versatile (will give and receive both oral and anal)
Then there are the Passive/versatiles who will happily give and receive oral, but only want to receive anal and not give it.
There are, of course, many diversities to this and this is just a basic outline.
Hope this has helped and also hope I've not termed things in a way that might be classed as insulting or condescending to anyone.
Marcuso
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There's a functional aspect - a guy can't DP very easily without getting a bit up close and personal to another guy's tackle, and if there's enough bodies in one room it can be more than it's worth the bother wondering which out-of-immediate-viewing-range legs/arms/bits are attached to which body of which gender - you just get on with it as long as it's enjoyable for you. Most situations involve pleasing the fem(s) so it's easy enough to have a physical camaradie that works (guiding thought - if this were a movie, would I be pleased with this scene?) - and there's more than the obvious interpretation of dp lol!
One of the biggest hurdles for me entering the swinging scene was my own reactions to another guy - the old, "He's not only built like an athlete, but hell, he's got a 12" dick!" worship :hunk:
Bear in mind the old joke (fairly true) about the first thing a guy does coming out of the shower is admire his own dick and inwardly compliment himself. Maintaining that confidence and still recognising that every other guy also has the right to feel the most supremely masculine thing in creation was a big step I think. (I know this may sad to ladies, but guys are quite attached to their dicks - I still am anyway!)
One of my heroes from the last century said "Life for both sexes is arduous, difficult, a perpetual struggle. More than anything... it calls for confidence in oneself... And how can we generate this imponderable quality most quickly? By thinking that other people are inferior to oneself." The trick for guys is to remember it's an illusion, useful for the moment. If the woman I want to please wants three dicks at once, I need those other guys - they are like partners in crime.
Ok, sorry, bit off topic, my mind will still find lots of things more interesting than snogging guys - if you ladies want to see a show between guys you either have to rely on the naturally bi/gay guys or wait for the rest to work thru our "don't like the taste of that even if I've never tried it" prejudices lol
:mrgreen:
(If I'm talking thru my hat here, someone please tell me!)
Sexlightened
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speaking from a purely bi curious point of view yes i am interested in the oral an masturbation aspect but would never consider giving or recieving anal at all
but this works boths with straight cples as well i once new a guy who would never give a woman oral sex yet loved his regular bj's
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Quote by penfolds06
i once new a guy who would never give a woman oral sex yet loved his regular bj's

Weirdo or what??? wink :wink: :wink:
You make the rules on what you want to do.
I live with a bi guy and when we meet guys for fun we clearly state what is acceptable before meets. To be totally blunt, he only wants cock, anal or oral . He does not wish to kiss or do any touchy feely stuff.
G x
Warming the Bed
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Thanks for the responses guys, I guess it confims that this site is about a varied lifestyle. I will take it on board that a bloody good discussion is required before any meeting, applying to situations between either sex.
Sex God
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Quote by cool4catz
i once new a guy who would never give a woman oral sex yet loved his regular bj's

Sounds rather selfish to me, surely one expects to have to give in order to receive. And that's all I'm going to say on the matter ;)
What if I wanted to give oral to a guy/guys cos that's what does it for me, but did not want to receive anything back...... Would I also be called selfish? confused
Sex God
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Quote by cool4catz
i once new a guy who would never give a woman oral sex yet loved his regular bj's

Sounds rather selfish to me, surely one expects to have to give in order to receive. And that's all I'm going to say on the matter ;)
What if I wanted to give oral to a guy/guys cos that's what does it for me, but did not want to receive anything back...... Would I also be called selfish? confused
No, you be called.......right now, if I had your number :razz:
So... if it's OK for me to be selfish, it is also OK for guys (regardless of their sexuality). Glad that is sorted lol
wink
Sex God
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Quote by cool4catz
What if I wanted to give oral to a guy/guys cos that's what does it for me, but did not want to receive anything back...... Would I also be called selfish? confused

No, you be called.......right now, if I had your number :razz:
So... if it's OK for me to be selfish, it is also OK for guys (regardless of their sexuality). Glad that is sorted lol
wink
Actually though, I think your question should have been, if a woman expects a man to go down on her, but won't do the same in return, would she be regarded as selfish?
That was not my question, that is obviously your question. My question was completely different. Think about it some more.
In answer to your question, I'd say yes it is selfish, but the guy might not think so cos some people (of either sex) prefer to give and not take.