:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: Right... who's washing the strips?! :giggle:
Sex God
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: Right... who's washing the strips?! :giggle:
Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login
The Forum Football Team
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: Right... who's washing the strips?! :giggle:
Sex God
Quote by Dirtygirly
Right... who's washing the strips?! :giggle:
I'll do it!..... Hmmm now then, a boil wash for a couple of hours hmmm that should get them fitting nice and tight
Sex God
Quote by The_third_man
Gripping, Well written and down right dirty!, Looking forward to seeing who gets pulled off at halftime
LMAO!
That's strictly a priveledge for those in the executive relief boxes... ;-)
There's more news to follow, Chris Kamara is having a fit at it... "It's absolutely unbelievable Jeff..."
Stay tuned...
Sex God
Quote by Resonance
Gripping, Well written and down right dirty!, Looking forward to seeing who gets pulled off at halftime
LMAO!
That's strictly a priveledge for those in the executive relief boxes... ;-)
There's more news to follow, Chris Kamara is having a fit at it... "It's absolutely unbelievable Jeff..."
Stay tuned...
Oooooooo is he on the team now? :twisted:
Quote by Freckledbird
Gripping, Well written and down right dirty!, Looking forward to seeing who gets pulled off at halftime
LMAO!
That's strictly a priveledge for those in the executive relief boxes... ;-)
There's more news to follow, Chris Kamara is having a fit at it... "It's absolutely unbelievable Jeff..."
Stay tuned...
Oooooooo is he on the team now? :twisted:
Would only be happy about being on the team if I got to kiis the girls when they score, play a one two with dirty girl and slip my tackle between Minxs legs :)
Quote by The_third_man
Gripping, Well written and down right dirty!, Looking forward to seeing who gets pulled off at halftime
LMAO!
That's strictly a priveledge for those in the executive relief boxes... ;-)
There's more news to follow, Chris Kamara is having a fit at it... "It's absolutely unbelievable Jeff..."
Stay tuned...
Oooooooo is he on the team now? :twisted:
Would only be happy about being on the team if I got to kiis the girls when they score, play a one two with dirty girl and slip my tackle between Minxs legs :)
:shock: Thats a dirty move!
You could get a stiff one from the ref for that, with the crowd shouting OFF! OFF! OFF!
Sex God
UPDATE...
SH United have been rocked by the news that outstanding left winger Flower has been ruled out of this weeks forthcoming encounter with Amsterdam Kink due to a "severely strained stamen caused by excessive use of his stalk". Not even a vigorous work over by Bouncy, MazandDen and team de-juicer Sam could restore Flower to full health. The player is said to be devastated at "having to spend all this time alone in the physio room, with a jacuzzi, shower and all these wonderful toys and the physio team of course... It is a hard life, but someone has to do it."
Preparation for the game with Amsterdam were further hampered when first team coach The Third Man, asked Mr Kent to switch flanks from the right to the left to fill in for the injured Flower. A right royal dust up followed in which Mr Kent said he would "rather give Gordon Brown a blow job" than play down the left. After disciplinary action, involving, whips chains and an angle grind, which Mr Kent thoroughly enjoyed, he was seem remonstrating with Third Man over the controversial decision until he was pulled off (:-) there you go Third man!) repeatedly by other team members. Manager Resonance however has refused to transfer list his star winger stating it was merely a "confusion of ideologies" and added "and besides Mrs Kent has some fantastic wally jumblatts."
SH United were also heartened by the news that NWC had secured a three year sponsorship deal with media mogul Richard Branson. Though the irony of the team running around with "Virgin" on the front of their shirts is not lost on many.
FreckledBird is making a swift recovery from her bout of bird flu and should be able to retain her place in the team for this weekends game. The fledgling full back revealed "The team have been so supportive, barely a moment has not gone by when someone has not been there, rubbing Vicks onto my chest with the tissues ready." Vick was unable to comment but was said to be entirely satisfied.
Finally, SH United have issued a statement revealing that manager Resonance's job is safe for the time being. This despite Luis Felipe Scolari now becoming available. The board issued fulsome praise of their incumbent manager stating "We've got to stick with him for now, he's got a flamin' contract. The only way we can get rid is either hiring a hitman or should he keel over with an unfortunate case of stricnine poisoning from his morning coffee..."
More news is expected shortly.
SH United have been rocked by the news that outstanding left winger Flower has been ruled out of this weeks forthcoming encounter with Amsterdam Kink due to a "severely strained stamen caused by excessive use of his stalk". Not even a vigorous work over by Bouncy, MazandDen and team de-juicer Sam could restore Flower to full health. The player is said to be devastated at "having to spend all this time alone in the physio room, with a jacuzzi, shower and all these wonderful toys and the physio team of course... It is a hard life, but someone has to do it."
Preparation for the game with Amsterdam were further hampered when first team coach The Third Man, asked Mr Kent to switch flanks from the right to the left to fill in for the injured Flower. A right royal dust up followed in which Mr Kent said he would "rather give Gordon Brown a blow job" than play down the left. After disciplinary action, involving, whips chains and an angle grind, which Mr Kent thoroughly enjoyed, he was seem remonstrating with Third Man over the controversial decision until he was pulled off (:-) there you go Third man!) repeatedly by other team members. Manager Resonance however has refused to transfer list his star winger stating it was merely a "confusion of ideologies" and added "and besides Mrs Kent has some fantastic wally jumblatts."
SH United were also heartened by the news that NWC had secured a three year sponsorship deal with media mogul Richard Branson. Though the irony of the team running around with "Virgin" on the front of their shirts is not lost on many.
FreckledBird is making a swift recovery from her bout of bird flu and should be able to retain her place in the team for this weekends game. The fledgling full back revealed "The team have been so supportive, barely a moment has not gone by when someone has not been there, rubbing Vicks onto my chest with the tissues ready." Vick was unable to comment but was said to be entirely satisfied.
Finally, SH United have issued a statement revealing that manager Resonance's job is safe for the time being. This despite Luis Felipe Scolari now becoming available. The board issued fulsome praise of their incumbent manager stating "We've got to stick with him for now, he's got a flamin' contract. The only way we can get rid is either hiring a hitman or should he keel over with an unfortunate case of stricnine poisoning from his morning coffee..."
More news is expected shortly.
Sex God
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: You're toooooo funny!
I did say to the " manager ", that I would play down the left but....he wanted me to wear sandals instead of boots.
I flatly refused, as to wear sandals of any description...infringed my human rights. Hasten to say he backed down on this, and will now be allowed some bloody big boots, to carry on down the right flanks.
I hope that clears everything up, and I would rather not have Scollari on our team, as it is obvious he has not got a clue about football.
I flatly refused, as to wear sandals of any description...infringed my human rights. Hasten to say he backed down on this, and will now be allowed some bloody big boots, to carry on down the right flanks.
I hope that clears everything up, and I would rather not have Scollari on our team, as it is obvious he has not got a clue about football.
Sex God
Quote by kentswingers777
I did say to the " manager ", that I would play down the left but....he wanted me to wear sandals instead of boots.
I flatly refused, as to wear sandals of any description...infringed my human rights. Hasten to say he backed down on this, and will now be allowed some bloody big boots, to carry on down the right flanks.
I hope that clears everything up, and I would rather not have Scollari on our team, as it is obvious he has not got a clue about football.
lmao!
That's a scurrilous rumour! They were lovely open toed Crocs! Ideal for a date when impressing a lady, or playing left wing!
;-)
Sex God
UPDATE...
SH United is proud to announced the appointment of Mrs Goggins as the team Jacuzzi floozy.
Her role will be to eat as many sprouts and baked beans as humanly possible and then provide after match entertainment for the team whilst sat in the communal bath, in an environmentally friendly manner, though not the in immediate vicinity obviously. Nose plugs will be provided on sprout days and matches and lighters are forbidden in the changing area.
Mrs G said today "It's a nice change to having Pat waving his sack in my face every morning and asking me if there are any deliveries I'd like him to make. I shall miss Jess though, what a fantastic pussy."
SH United is proud to announced the appointment of Mrs Goggins as the team Jacuzzi floozy.
Her role will be to eat as many sprouts and baked beans as humanly possible and then provide after match entertainment for the team whilst sat in the communal bath, in an environmentally friendly manner, though not the in immediate vicinity obviously. Nose plugs will be provided on sprout days and matches and lighters are forbidden in the changing area.
Mrs G said today "It's a nice change to having Pat waving his sack in my face every morning and asking me if there are any deliveries I'd like him to make. I shall miss Jess though, what a fantastic pussy."
Sex God
Quote by Resonance
That's a scurrilous rumour! They were lovely open toed Crocs! Ideal for a date when impressing a lady, or playing left wing!
;-)
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:I just spat juice over my keyboard!!!
Sex God
Quote by Dirtygirly
That's a scurrilous rumour! They were lovely open toed Crocs! Ideal for a date when impressing a lady, or playing left wing!
;-)
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:I just spat juice over my keyboard!!!
There are people on here and in parliament that would quite happily pay to see that... ;-)
Quote by Resonance
UPDATE...
SH United is proud to announced the appointment of Mrs Goggins as the team Jacuzzi floozy.
Her role will be to eat as many sprouts and baked beans as humanly possible and then provide after match entertainment for the team whilst sat in the communal bath, in an environmentally friendly manner, though not the in immediate vicinity obviously. Nose plugs will be provided on sprout days and matches and lighters are forbidden in the changing area.
Mrs G said today "It's a nice change to having Pat waving his sack in my face every morning and asking me if there are any deliveries I'd like him to make. I shall miss Jess though, what a fantastic pussy."
:haha: :haha:
