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The Hoover challenge

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EagerSlut
Sex God
Right. This is a serious post ok?
I bought a new hoover. One of those things with attatchments to get into all the crevices and places where things like to lurk but where the rotating brushes can't reach.
Well, it's wicked! It could suck the bollocks off a Mammoth. Yep! Rip it's balls right out roots and all. :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
So I, er wondered........................................... redface surprisedops: :oops: :oops:
:censored: wink :wink:
Who's hoover's got the most suction? dunno :twisted: :twisted:
bolt
Unknown User
Is it a purple one confused:
celticq
Sex God
Yes.
But not the dyson - its one of the old fashioned yellow and grey ones.
FFS Old fashioned. What do I sound like - when I were a lass - Dysons were grey and yellow.
Unknown User
Just realised I'm trapped in between two bottoms . redface wink
celticq
Sex God
I do hope you are not complaining :!:
Unknown User
Certainly not! biggrin wink
But the movement is making my eyes go funny :!:
dundeecpl
Sex God
Quote by Eagerslut9
Right. This is a serious post ok?
I bought a new hoover. One of those things with attatchments to get into all the crevices and places where things like to lurk but where the rotating brushes can't reach.
Well, it's wicked! It could suck the bollocks off a Mammoth. Yep! Rip it's balls right out roots and all. :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
So I, er wondered........................................... redface surprisedops: :oops: :oops:
:censored: wink :wink:
Who's hoover's got the most suction? dunno :twisted: :twisted:
bolt

You can test mine for yourself :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
What a sucker lol :lol: :lol:
flapjackboy
Orgasminator
Quote by celticq
Yes.
But not the dyson - its one of the old fashioned yellow and grey ones.
FFS Old fashioned. What do I sound like - when I were a lass - Dysons were grey and yellow.

By 'eck. Grey & yellow? Two colours? Luxury! In my day, it were a pink Dyson and you had to like it cause there were no other colours available.
SilkandBigG
Sex God
Ive seen somethread sin here but this one is ...................................undescribable
Dave__Notts
Sex God
Quote by Silk and Big G
Ive seen somethread sin here but this one is ...................................undescribable

It's errrrrrr.............yep you are right
But it got me laughing that much. Now I know why I like this Cafe. You can have serious posts, funny posts, heart wrenching posts. It is soooooooo diverse. The peeps are great.
Fingers crossed that the Cafe or the inmates never change
Dave_Notts
easy
Sex God
Well our Dyson usually leaves a big red mark at the base of my bits...... :shock:
WHAT???????
Oh I see, it's ok for the women to abuse the washing machine, but as soon as a guy mentions having fun with a domestic appliance you lot go all prudish. rolleyes evil :evil: :evil:
*wanders off mumbling about bloody double standards*
:grin: :grin: :grin: :grin: :grin: :grin: :grin: :grin:
(sorry guys I couldn't resist this little joke lol )
HornyRed
Sex God
Ive got a hodododododoh thingy,you know,,one of them boxes on a long handle that you push around yer carpet . No cable, ligthweight ,no noise (except hododododoh) biggrin .One draw back tho,,,when your hodododohdering, and you hit a chair leg,,all the dirt falls out and you have to start again!!! sad
Sarah
Sex God
Quote by Eagerslut9
Right. This is a serious post ok?
I bought a new hoover. One of those things with attatchments to get into all the crevices and places where things like to lurk but where the rotating brushes can't reach.
Well, it's wicked! It could suck the bollocks off a Mammoth. Yep! Rip it's balls right out roots and all. :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
So I, er wondered........................................... redface surprisedops: :oops: :oops:
:censored: wink :wink:
Who's hoover's got the most suction? dunno :twisted: :twisted:
bolt

Eagerslut,
You can pop round here anytime and do the hoovering, bring your gaget with you
westerross
Sex God
Quote by easy
Well our Dyson usually leaves a big red mark at the base of my bits...... :shock:

Conclusion:
1) Bollocks bigger than a mammoth or,
2) Dysons are crap.
I know Dysons are pretty good so how the f**k do you walk down the street without knocking people of the pavement (shit I nearly said sidewalk then - come to think of it that's what it would be!!)?? Does this make any sense?
Vicky_uk
Sex God
Quote by hornyred and dino
Ive got a hodododododoh thingy,you know,,one of them boxes on a long handle that you push around yer carpet . No cable, ligthweight ,no noise (except hododododoh) biggrin .One draw back tho,,,when your hodododohdering, and you hit a chair leg,,all the dirt falls out and you have to start again!!! sad

My Mum had one of those i was always knocking the fluff out :shock:
HornyRed
Sex God
Quote by Vicky_uk
Ive got a hodododododoh thingy,you know,,one of them boxes on a long handle that you push around yer carpet . No cable, ligthweight ,no noise (except hododododoh) biggrin .One draw back tho,,,when your hodododohdering, and you hit a chair leg,,all the dirt falls out and you have to start again!!! sad

My Mum had one of those i was always knocking the fluff out :shock: We got a dyson too,but its not as cool as the Hododododoah :D
EagerSlut
Sex God
:bounce: WARNING :bounce:
Sexual abuse of domestic appliances may get you into trouble with the Thought Police! :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
Manufacturer's warranties could be invalidated, but hey! If they haven't printed a warning then, ahem,................... you might be able to sue for compensation for losing yer nuggets :grin: :grin: dunno
Well, I said this was a, er................serious?? post wink :wink: :twisted: :twisted:
bolt
Unknown User
Hoover confused Whats one of those. We still use a Stiff broom. It's last well, 2 new heads (more than i get) and 3 handles, and it's still as good as when we got it biggrin
Dan__Solo
Casanova
'' NOTHING SUCKS LIKE AN ELECTROLUX ''
Well that was the advertising slogan dunno
However, I knew a girl in Rotherham who could dissprove that !! :eeek:
Oh the memories :lickface:
Dan wink
on_ion
Warming the Bed
We WERE going to post but totally thrown by Vickys avatar worship
EagerSlut
Sex God
Quote by on_ion
We WERE going to post but totally thrown by Vickys avatar worship

lol :lol:
Excellent taste, butNO EXCUSEso take that smackbottom :smackbottom: wink :wink:
Now go and give your hoover some TLC and FFS I don't want to know what make it is and whether it's any good or not at picking up dust dunno
:twisted: :twisted: bolt
Kitty
Sex God
Quote by Eagerslut9
Right. This is a serious post ok?

Errr........Right! Like who's gonna believe that Mr Eagerslut???? dunno
Quote by Eagerslut9
I bought a new hoover. One of those things with attatchments to get into all the crevices and places where things like to lurk but where the rotating brushes can't reach.
Well, it's wicked! It could suck the bollocks off a Mammoth. Yep! Rip it's balls right out roots and all. :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:

Ok well i've created an advert for 'Eagersluts Suction Services' - So am taking bookings now for next weekend!!!!
I've pinched you for the first slot redface surprisedops: :oops: although with wooden floors in the house you'll err...........have to find something else to do with your attachments :censored:
bolt