The International Taking A Shower Event

2 Dec 2004

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: This is one of my favourite threads ever. Found it after the awards thread was reposted and just had to share it with everyone again.
I'm still without a shower so can't compete evil

At least I have a nice big corner bath though - and as it's so cold tonight I'm off to do some laps in it to warm up a bit cool

Hope this has everyone else laughing as much as me :lol2:

2 Dec 2004

You're right - one of the threads it's a pleasure to revisit and howl over.
:P
Thanks for bumping it up Angel - kiss

2 Dec 2004

OMG! Thanks Angel....I missed this one (b4 my time), but I'm so glad you dragged it back. I needed a laugh tonight - and this gave me loads. lol

:lol: :lol:

2 Dec 2004

Glad you brought this one out of the archives.
Bloody funny lol

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

3 Dec 2004

my god....I have forgotton all about this, well there's bugger all in the diary for this weekend so I will definately be trying again ....I have a feeling the coveted 'Golden Plug' will be mine given that the sarge is gonna have one hell of a job getting showered whilst locked in his tank

3 Dec 2004

The Golden Plug !! Nooooo!! It will never be yours Davej. When I get out of this tank I'm going to re-establish a new World Record. :shock: :shock:
Now then where's that bloody Easy got to??? :? :?

3 Dec 2004

Woo hoo Ive moved so my shower is now in the right place lol

still havent got a pc at home but I have got my driving licence back so Im on for the challenge
stand ye ready davej confused

:

3 Dec 2004

objection!!!....objection!!!.....I've been making all my attempts whilst wearing zip up slippers, those of you that have brought them for your grandparents, will have no doubt tried the zipping action and found exactly as I have , that a short zip (these things are only a couple of inches long) makes for an awkward zip......
On each and every attempt that I have made, at least one zip has jammed whilst I've been trying to get the slippers off my feet, normally whilst I'm also trying to continue running which in turn causes the type of gait across the landing, that you would see from a drunken one legged person.....a sort of giant hop and twist type thing!
......either we all start in brogues, toasties, zip up slippers, or flip flops....what aint right is that some start in footwear that is easier to remove.
Seeing as this is nearer to water sports ( stop it, we can all make that joke) I would like to nominate the divers flipper as suitable footwea. I would also like a rule that says no one can remove any item of clothing until they are in the shower room, I believe that the combination of this rule, the divers flippers and a flight of stairs to the shower room, would increase the sports spectator appeal no end.

3 Dec 2004

Quote by MISSCHIEF
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
8 mins for just shower
13 mins for shower n hairwash
27 mins for shower face shave n hairwash
3 hrs 48 mins for shower, hairwash and full shaving package (includes time for sticking bits of toilet paper to the nicked bits)

You've obviously not watched a man in the shower for a long time Misschief, when did you ever see a man wash those parts most dear to him in less than the eight minutes you've allocated to the whole job.

3 Dec 2004

I am most concerned about LearnedFool. He posted in this thread back in May and never heard from since.
I wonder if he is still in the bath :shock:

3 Dec 2004

Quote by Sgt Bilko

1. Competitors must start with their clothes on (including some form of footwear)
2. Occupants of bungalows must run out of the back door and back in through the front door instead of climbing stairs and out through the front door/ in the back door on the return leg.
3. The shower must be off and have been off for at least one hour before the record is attempted to ensure the hot water is not "primed."
4. Any shampoo may be used.
curtains are optional
6. Every inch of the body must be washed. This will be a disadvantage to fat people but this is compensated by the fact that skinny people will have to run around the shower to get wet!!
7. A minimum of dressing gown and footwear constitutes being post shower dressed.
Note: one pair of breasts = one knob and sack!!

Rules 1 and 6 both mention footwear but neither stipulates what that footwear must be. I like Daves idea of the diving flippers but after consulting the H&S Members we have had to rule that out. We are therefore going with just Slippers, because they sound like Flippers. Zips are an optional extra!!! confused

:? :? :?

3 Dec 2004

Can i just clarify one thing - the post to record your finishing time - can that be pre typed for the simple task of hitting the submit button?
I know where just talking of seconds but every second counts in this sport lol

3 Dec 2004

Quote by Mark
Can i just clarify one thing - the post to record your finishing time - can that be pre typed for the simple task of hitting the submit button?
I know where just talking of seconds but every second counts in this sport

Good point Andy. I notice this is what Sarge did when he set the founding record.
Yes a very good tactic i may hasten to add, however is it it realms of sportmanship?
:lol: :lol: :lol: This seriouly beyond madness!!

3 Dec 2004

Right, seeing as this thread has popped up again, I am going to go for it again tonight !!
At 2100 (9 oclock pm WBB) tonight I will make a START Post, have my shower, then post a prepared post to stop the clock.
This time I am going to make sure there is soap in the shower, no kids toys in the way and the shower isn't set to blistering hot.!!
I WILL break the 5 minute barrier !!! :shock: :shock: :shock: wink

:lol: :lol: :lol:

3 Dec 2004

Sgt Bilko - the Roger Bannister of Swinging Heaven.
Stay tuned this could be one of those historical moments!!

3 Dec 2004

This I have to see
Ok sarge its a fair cop Ill try and remember to let you out of the tank before I go lol

3 Dec 2004

Well as we are hoping to see friends later I figured it would be a good time to try for a medal biggrin

So I left here after checking pms. Ran up the stairs taking my t-shirt off, smacked my elbow on the banister and drew blood FFS mad

(literally)
Undid belt on my jeans and pulled them down, shit, got them stuck on Ians slippers which I worse cos I THOUGHT they could come off easy. Lay on the landing for 3 minutes trying to get me legs from this tangled mess of jeans. Used t-shirt to wipe blood off my elbow. Removed my bra (couldn't have run up the stairs without it on :shock smile

Gets in shower without taking me knickers off :doh: Removed damp knickers and flings them across the bathroom.
Reached for the shaving Gel and razor, bloody hell! Changes razor blade and sets too it rolleyes

*Remind me not to rush when shaving cos I'm not sitting on a rubber ring
Washes hair which is not fair. I have so much hair compared to some of you men so I at least a 2 minutes taken off my time. Face Scrub while conditioner is on.
Bloody scrubber thingy gets caught up on a nipple ring so that takes me a minute or two to untangle.
Washes body and rinses everything off
TWENTY SEVEN FLUCKING MINUTES????????????????????????
I dunno why I bothered dunno

cos all it did was made me late for getting the kids from school :roll:

3 Dec 2004

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
I think there's room for improvement there Dawn!! :shock: confused

:lol: :lol: :lol:

3 Dec 2004

I think I'll have a go at this. The shower is about 15 feet away and there are no stairs involved which gives me the kind of unfair advantage I need at my age. biggrin

Back soon... bolt

3 Dec 2004

Quote by Ice Pie
I think I'll have a go at this. The shower is about 15 feet away and there are no stairs involved which gives me the kind of unfair advantage I need at my age.
Back soon...

Sorry Ice. :shock: :shock:
Rule two comes into play !! confused

:? :?

3 Dec 2004

Damn .... i'm off out drinking tonight with a mate
Bollocks .... will miss the attempt sad

:( :(
Someone will have to txt me the results .... can't miss the most important game of the SH season ;) ;) ;)

3 Dec 2004

Quote by Sgt Bilko
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
I think there's room for improvement there Dawn!! :shock: :lol: :lol: :lol:

So I take it I don't win anything then :cry: rolleyes

Dawn :silly:

3 Dec 2004

Bollox.
Thought I'd done really well, came back, saw rule 2, went for a little run (which involves climbing a bloody wall thank you very much!!) TWICE... 14 minutes and my hair's still wet
Absolute crap. :lol2:

3 Dec 2004

Quote by Ice Pie
Bollox.
Thought I'd done really well, came back, saw rule 2, went for a little run (which involves climbing a bloody wall thank you very much!!) TWICE... 14 minutes and my hair's still wet
Absolute crap. :lol2:

Still better than Dawn's effort though!! lol

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

3 Dec 2004

Quote by Sgt Bilko
Bollox.
Thought I'd done really well, came back, saw rule 2, went for a little run (which involves climbing a bloody wall thank you very much!!) TWICE... 14 minutes and my hair's still wet
Absolute crap. :lol2:

Still better than Dawn's effort though!! lol

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Oh piss off mad

:x :x :x :x :lol:

3 Dec 2004

Quote by Dawn_Mids
Bollox.
Thought I'd done really well, came back, saw rule 2, went for a little run (which involves climbing a bloody wall thank you very much!!) TWICE... 14 minutes and my hair's still wet
Absolute crap. :lol2:

Still better than Dawn's effort though!! lol

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Oh piss off mad

:x :x :x :x :lol:
Dawn, it's not the winning that matters - it's the getting clean !! confused

:? :? :? :?
kiss

For trying xxxx

3 Dec 2004

Quote by Sgt Bilko
Bollox.
Thought I'd done really well, came back, saw rule 2, went for a little run (which involves climbing a bloody wall thank you very much!!) TWICE... 14 minutes and my hair's still wet
Absolute crap. :lol2:

Still better than Dawn's effort though!! lol

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Oh piss off mad

:x :x :x :x :lol:
Dawn, it's not the winning that matters - it's the getting clean !! confused

:? :? :? :?
kiss

For trying xxxx
Oh I've come over all warm and snuggly now.
Thank you Sarge :kiss:
Dawn :smug:

3 Dec 2004

Quote by Sgt Bilko
Right, seeing as this thread has popped up again, I am going to go for it again tonight !!
At 2100 (9 oclock pm WBB) tonight I will make a START Post, have my shower, then post a prepared post to stop the clock.
This time I am going to make sure there is soap in the shower, no kids toys in the way and the shower isn't set to blistering hot.!!
I WILL break the 5 minute barrier !!! :shock: :shock: :shock: :lol: :lol: :lol:

:shock: umm, Sarge, have you had any practice since your last record attempt?
lhk

3 Dec 2004

Quote by KitKat
:shock: umm, Sarge, have you had any practice since your last record attempt?
lhk

Kat, I am an athlete, in prime condition and what's more, I'm fairly certain I have had a shower since May 3rd !! :shock: :shock: confused

:? :?

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

3 Dec 2004

I would just like to say that after 6 months of having a broken shower, on Thursday of this week the new one was finally installed.
Now all those with out a shower are more than welcome to pop round and try it out, there is a staircase and I think all of the other rules can be covered.
So that is Angel Chat and Warwick on the list, anyone else?
Right see you at so we are ready for 9pm.