Well... more advice needed... hope I don't shock my other half when he reads this - though I have mentioned it!
I have thought about this for a while... and would sometime in the future like to try it. Not knowing what to do.. would like some advice.. I have never done it before, and my vision is of a room filled with candles... Cocteau Twins "Blue Bell Knoll" on the stereo, a nice bottle of Merlot wine... and a few silk scarves... not sure if I would want more than that. I would like to do this with my partner, and for him to do it to me. I'm a bit worried!
I have never really talked to anyone about this, so I really would appreciate some help with my predicament..
How do I go about it? I have had some really good and honest replies to my other questions, so hope you wonderful people can help me out again! :scared: :scared:
Thanks for reading this... hope I get some replies!
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Tie me up... how do I do it safely?
Sex God
all sounds pretty good to me Missk. Think you just have to go with whatever feels good for you. Safety really only comes into play if you are getting into harder scenes, or at least that's my theory anyway. As long as the two of you have discussed how you want the play to go, then should be great. Bit of sexy play with someone you trust and in an environment that is conducive to said play seems like the way to go - have fun!
MissKitty....you joined on my birthday, and make frequent refrences to Merlot......are you my long lost twin???? 
For how to do it, click here:
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/74376.html
For how not to do it, click here:
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/279104.html?highlight=not%20sub
The fact that they're both threads I started is not indicative of any narcissism.....just the fact I can't remember it unless I wrote it!
Have fun :thumbup:
For how to do it, click here:
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/74376.html
For how not to do it, click here:
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/279104.html?highlight=not%20sub
The fact that they're both threads I started is not indicative of any narcissism.....just the fact I can't remember it unless I wrote it!
Have fun :thumbup:
Firstly - Good music choice!
Secondly - the most important thing is trust, you have to trust each other completely. Talk about it first, not with a clip board and a check list, maybe over a glass of wine or as foreplay. Know each other's boundaries before you start and then you can push them together
Thirdly - have a safe word. Very important, and don't have one that you'd use anyway like stop or no, because sometimes those are things you'd say automatically and sometimes not mean. Traffic lights are common, green for go, amber for not comfortable but don't stop and red for stop immediately.
Enjoy!
H.x
Secondly - the most important thing is trust, you have to trust each other completely. Talk about it first, not with a clip board and a check list, maybe over a glass of wine or as foreplay. Know each other's boundaries before you start and then you can push them together
Thirdly - have a safe word. Very important, and don't have one that you'd use anyway like stop or no, because sometimes those are things you'd say automatically and sometimes not mean. Traffic lights are common, green for go, amber for not comfortable but don't stop and red for stop immediately.
Enjoy!
H.x
Sex God
all very good points above specially trust and a safe word
Hope you enjoy it :thumbup:
Just make sure the man isnt drunk
painful memories of my first attempt comes to light
Hope you enjoy it :thumbup:
Just make sure the man isnt drunk
painful memories of my first attempt comes to light
when wor lass and I started doing this.. we used all the safe words and we tied hands so that the sub could undo it and knew she could. This enabled us to build up trust and was a reassurance to both of us that the Domme was at the sub's beck and call even tho' it looked like the sub was the one that is tied up 
we now 'just do it' and the trust is soo good that the Domme knows the limits and takes the sub a little further everytime.
As Dommes and Subs we are both into seperate things so one of us likes pain and the other likes the more sensual and teasing side.
Mainly just enjoy it. Only you know what you enjoy and it is upto you to help your partner to understand that. Try things.. experiment. Many household implements are good at supplying different textures and a blindfold is always useful for ensuring the element of surprise.
we now 'just do it' and the trust is soo good that the Domme knows the limits and takes the sub a little further everytime.
As Dommes and Subs we are both into seperate things so one of us likes pain and the other likes the more sensual and teasing side.
Mainly just enjoy it. Only you know what you enjoy and it is upto you to help your partner to understand that. Try things.. experiment. Many household implements are good at supplying different textures and a blindfold is always useful for ensuring the element of surprise.
Quote by noladreams30
all sounds pretty good to me Missk. Think you just have to go with whatever feels good for you. Safety really only comes into play if you are getting into harder scenes, or at least that's my theory anyway. As long as the two of you have discussed how you want the play to go, then should be great. Bit of sexy play with someone you trust and in an environment that is conducive to said play seems like the way to go - have fun!
Thanks Nola! I do trust him, so will be fun :-)
Quote by winchwench
MissKitty....you joined on my birthday, and make frequent refrences to Merlot......are you my long lost twin????
For how to do it, click here:
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/74376.html
For how not to do it, click here:
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/279104.html?highlight=not%20sub
The fact that they're both threads I started is not indicative of any narcissism.....just the fact I can't remember it unless I wrote it!
Have fun :thumbup:
You never know I might be your long lost sister!! I love Merlot... just going to have a little glass now...
Quote by H-x
Firstly - Good music choice!
Secondly - the most important thing is trust, you have to trust each other completely. Talk about it first, not with a clip board and a check list, maybe over a glass of wine or as foreplay. Know each other's boundaries before you start and then you can push them together
Thirdly - have a safe word. Very important, and don't have one that you'd use anyway like stop or no, because sometimes those are things you'd say automatically and sometimes not mean. Traffic lights are common, green for go, amber for not comfortable but don't stop and red for stop immediately.
Enjoy!
H.x
Thanks for that... glad you like my music choice.. I'm a child of the 80's!
Quote by X_fanny_x
all very good points above specially trust and a safe word
Hope you enjoy it :thumbup:
Just make sure the man isnt drunk
painful memories of my first attempt comes to light
I will enjoy it! Just hope the other half is receptive... I think he will be! we do talk about everything x re drunk... he doesn't like feeling drunk so i'm ok there!!
Quote by splendid_
when wor lass and I started doing this.. we used all the safe words and we tied hands so that the sub could undo it and knew she could. This enabled us to build up trust and was a reassurance to both of us that the Domme was at the sub's beck and call even tho' it looked like the sub was the one that is tied up
we now 'just do it' and the trust is soo good that the Domme knows the limits and takes the sub a little further everytime.
As Dommes and Subs we are both into seperate things so one of us likes pain and the other likes the more sensual and teasing side.
Mainly just enjoy it. Only you know what you enjoy and it is upto you to help your partner to understand that. Try things.. experiment. Many household implements are good at supplying different textures and a blindfold is always useful for ensuring the element of surprise.
I like the sound of the teasing... and household implements???? tell me more!!!!!
Sex God
Quote by Misskitty_2008
all very good points above specially trust and a safe word
Hope you enjoy it :thumbup:
Just make sure the man isnt drunk
painful memories of my first attempt comes to light
I will enjoy it! Just hope the other half is receptive... I think he will be! we do talk about everything x re drunk... he doesn't like feeling drunk so i'm ok there!!
Sounds like you on the right track :thumbup: talk through it you should be able to tell by his facial reactions how much he is or isnt up for it and the best thing you take it as slow as your both comfortable with
Quote by X_fanny_x
all very good points above specially trust and a safe word
Hope you enjoy it :thumbup:
Just make sure the man isnt drunk
painful memories of my first attempt comes to light
I will enjoy it! Just hope the other half is receptive... I think he will be! we do talk about everything x re drunk... he doesn't like feeling drunk so i'm ok there!!
Sounds like you on the right track :thumbup: talk through it you should be able to tell by his facial reactions how much he is or isnt up for it and the best thing you take it as slow as your both comfortable with
Not sure if its going to be slow today... I haven't seen him for three days.... need I say more ;-)
I will take it slow... thanks for dropping by again!
xx
