Now I have always defended, 'time wasters', not because I consider myself one.
However there is a lady who if she knew how many times I was planing to ask for a meet, would have grounds for suspecting my determination to turn up. That Murphy get in the way, Just before I have asked. just as well it was mostly before I have sent the PM.
Then again I have been exchanging PMs with some nice cafers for a long time. At the moment I think I will not be jumping into meeting. So is that 'time wasting' or just occupying time?
Travis
I don't understand what you mean.
Most of the time wasting you refer to, Travis, is in your own head. You feel you're wasting time because you spend a lot of time thinking about meeting, but the reality is that the object of your desires experiences very little wasted time. You see chatting as wasting time when I see it as getting to know that your potential playmate matches your criteria etc. You said that most of the time Murphy raises his ugly head just before you arrange a meet, so your fellow swinger is not aware even that a meeting was on the cards. They may see you as a prevaricator, or very nervous, or just friendly.
I am beginning to be wary of arranging meets, because just recently, Murphy's been around at every date I've made. Usually in the form of my kids, so I've stopped making firm plans and just say we will try and get to a club soon and meet up with them if they happen to be there. I know it's a bit vague, and may be construed by some as a meet that has to be consigned to the 'time-wasted' file, but it's the best I can do at the moment. As far as calling ourselves 'swingers' goes, we are not having a very fruitful time and feel slightly fraudulent, but I'm sure things will improve.
And I've been chatting to a guy on here maybe two years now... we've arranged to meet twice. First time, something came up and he had to cancel. No probs. Second time we had a complete miscommunication with dates: I thought he meant one Friday and he thought the next. When we realised, I couldn't do his date and he couldn't do mine.
Upshot of it all? In two weeks time he's moving up north. Finally, we'll be in meetable distance from each other. It may happen soon, or it may take a while.
Wasted time? No. He's become a friend in the meantime and that will last a lot longer than anything sexual.
Timewaster... a waster of time :shock:
isnt that the person in the queue in the post office who cant remember their pin no ???????
Or the person who sits at the junction of the road looking left and right ... then not moving on when the road is clear :shock:
Or is it the the person who askes at the tax office about tax efficient ways to avoid tax payments .... derrrrrrrrr ?.....
get real ??
.....
I have been very aware that I may be seen as a "time waster" recently. So much so that I have said I'm not meeting at the moment on my profile.
I have a very busy, complicated life what with work and a child, and being a single parent. I have some "contacts" I have made here that I had every intention of meeting but could never quite manage to get it together!! A couple of them have become "friends" and I never feel under any pressure.
However my own guilt has caused me some stress and hence the "not meeting".
I do enjoy my time here both in the forum, and in chat, and as long as I'm up front about my situation, I don't feel I'm wasting my time or anyone elses.
Fingers crossed, my situation will improve in time.
(then I just might get a shag!!)
Wench x
yes but do u realy let them get that close???
I think it tends to be the people who were seemingly 'doing nothing' who then go go to complain about having their time wasted.
After all there's plenty that can be done about the house whilst you are waiting. Full time shaggers don't have much time for housework, so they could always do with a bit of sprucing up arounf the place.
Indeed whilst your partner is recovering from the first bout of passionate sex or tied up during mild s+m, there's no reason why you couldn't whip round with a chammy or even peel the spuds in readiness for tonight's pie and mash.
No, it's them that are hell bent of having a miserable time who need to complain.
To me a time waster is simply an indivdual or couple or whoever who arranges a meet and the fails to show. Anybody with a ounce of creditability and good manners would do what ever is necessary to cancel or rearrange a meet. I've had my own share of time wasters, sitting in a car park all afternoon was far from fun, plus other occasions when I've been messed about. Believe it or believe it not even single blokes have a life outside of here and cannot be expected to just drop their lives to rush off to meet others who suddenly have use of you. Happened to me once, just couldn't believe the cheek of it. Very rude.
As for chatting, using the forum, or PMing others in the course of general conversation/airing their views is far from time wasting in my opinion. It's a chance to meet people just the same as going to the pub, club, or gym. It's a while since I had a meet, but I do enjoy coming here to chat and air my views and have a good laugh too.
Dont sweat T , its not time wasting as long as they dont mind
What a nice place this is?
So understanding!
Thanks all.
We think being honest and up front about wanting or being able to meet up saves everyone a whole load of time.
We do spend time in the chat rooms and most of this time we are not activly looking for people to meet although sometimes our chatting has led to some very good meetings.
As others have said the no show gang are the time wasters that we all want to avoid.
Zoe & Steve
Things are slow today, I think I am...
The OP has a point, its seems there to many people like to scream timewaster nowadays, even without having a meet planned, its gotten to the stage that your put off even chatting to people via msn etc, as they expect a meet if it goes that far.
Can understand why people now choose clubs these days, meeting people online is just becoming too much hassle, after all its supposed to be fun.
Good sex starts in the head and the exchange of private messages, text and emails can all make the build up to a meet very very enjoyable and not a waste of time. :thumbup:
