I don't think you can 'force' yourself to trust others.
You have to go on your instincts... and gradually create a cloak of trust... little by little.
Trust for me is an extremely fragile thing... once broken.. it's gone forever.
equi-princess
p.s Dawnie.. hugs
We have all misplaced trust in someone at some point, its just one of lifes lessons. Ive had exactly the same thing happen with a best friend too. I carried a lot of guilt about why it happened to me, did I make them do what they did to me? But after talking to mutual friends, I found out that my friends reputation wasnt as good as they made it out to be.
The lesson here therefore is dont let it colour your judgement Dawn, and dont carry their baggage for them, its their problem not yours, and it shouldnt be carried over into other relationships you have.
Chin up hun xxx
ive always judged as i wish to be judged by others , i dont do unprovoked shit to others and then when i find out they are doing shit to me it surprises and annoys me, unforgivable behaviour that will get its rewards one day, so they say!
there are some sneaky peices of shit around,thats always worth remembering
staggy
Just reading Missy's post has put a few things in context in my mind.
Trust will breed respect and trustworthiness - in someone decent. It will always, however, be open to abuse by someone unscrupulous.
Of course the opposite is true that suspicion breeds contempt if it is unjustified but it is a good defence against someone unscrupulous.
We all have to make our judgements in life as to where to draw the line. It is a line that some people need to re-draw continually - others stick to one principle.
One thing that the original question didn't distinguish is whether the loss of trust was from someone known face to face or merely through contact here. As it was a 'true friend' then I assume it was someone more familiar than just a contact here- in which case it is understandably upsetting to get it wrong.
The difference with relationships that are formed on here with no face to face contact is they are inherently more risky. There is no body language to relay someone's real attitude. Kiss quoted someone wise above that 'we can slip into trust people to be what we want them to be'. On here without the body language that is a big risk and likely to be a mistake.
.
I have only two friends - they are people who I know in a crisis I can rely on and will be there for me no matter what. We may not see eye to eye on many things and my oldest friend from the age of 14 - we have fallen out badly once in that time.
I have lots of other people who I really love their company but I dont see them in the same way if that makes sense.
I trust everyone until I am given a reason not to and after that I just move on as to have anger hurts me more than them I have learnt over the years.
Hurt can come from so many directions in work, family, social that you can be eaten up with not trusting.
Dawnie
I am sorry that you have been caught up in something which has clearly hurt you. You are on the cusp of such great success and achievement in your life that it wont take you long to move on. Learn from it but dont let it color your world too much as the rich tapestry of life is there for your taking.
Corrie xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
due to things in my childhood, i am always waiting for people to do things to hurt me.
it does not mean i am stand off ish, but it just never comes as a surprise when people do something to me, if that makes sence.
i have a lot of friends, but they all tend to be far away now.
where i now live i dont really have any frieds and i gues that makes me a bit lonely sometimes.
Dawn.
) but even so, there is a point where I think; "Right, enough is enough".
Similar here. I will trust folks so far and will then wait to see what develops. I know it sounds a little paranoid, but I don't think you get past 25-30 without developing this sense of mistrust for most people.
I know someone said you shouldn't let it affect you, but as you know we're all a product of our experiences. ;) 
:uhoh:
), but the little secrets and the stuff that has a big impact on my life, well that's the sort of thing kept for the very very few. Same the other way round, it's only the same very very few that let me in their hearts.
and it's something an Estate Agent (and surrounding people) might need to know!!! 
