For fear of breaking the AUP, I won't link the url, but it is under
Got me thinking about how "single-visioned" some people can be.
If it doesn't fit in their version of the world then it must be wrong!
Well I'm sorry but I will stick to being a swinger and have all the fun!!
Jeni
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Vanilla World - How They View Us
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Quote by Devon_desires
For fear of breaking the AUP, I won't link the url, but it is under
Got me thinking about how "single-visioned" some people can be.
If it doesn't fit in their version of the world then it must be wrong!
Well I'm sorry but I will stick to being a swinger and have all the fun!!
Jeni
Jeni, others have the right to their views just as much as you do!
I feel it is you who is rather "single-visioned".
Sex God
Quote by Liaisons
For fear of breaking the AUP, I won't link the url, but it is under
Got me thinking about how "single-visioned" some people can be.
If it doesn't fit in their version of the world then it must be wrong!
Well I'm sorry but I will stick to being a swinger and have all the fun!!
Jeni
Jeni, others have the right to their views just as much as you do!
I feel it is you who is rather "single-visioned".
Where
Quote by Liaisons
For fear of breaking the AUP, I won't link the url, but it is under
Got me thinking about how "single-visioned" some people can be.
If it doesn't fit in their version of the world then it must be wrong!
Well I'm sorry but I will stick to being a swinger and have all the fun!!
Jeni
Jeni, others have the right to their views just as much as you do!
I feel it is you who is rather "single-visioned".
wrong side of bed this morning?
Sexpert
Quote by Liaisons
Jeni, unfortuantly you just don't get it do you? On that forum you plucked out of cyberspace the posters were expressing a whole spectrum of views, i.e. not "single-visioned".
But you have deemed them "single-visioned", therefore it is you who is "single-visioned", not they.
I think you're digging a little too deep into what Jeni is trying to say....
I'm with Jeni on this one as a whole, i organised a munch last weekend and the guy who sorted the room for me was a lad who works for me.
On the saturday afternoon i pulled him to one side and explained who we were so to speak, and his reply was "for gods sake, does this mean there's gonna be a pile of car keys in the middle of the dancefloor at 11pm then?" and he was deadly serious.
There is a real social stigma surrounding us swingers, we're seen as a bunch of middle aged pervs that run round and fuck anything in site when that is totally the opposite.....the only way anyone will ever understand us is to become one of us!
Quote by Liaisons
Jeni, unfortuantly you just don't get it do you? On that forum you plucked out of cyberspace the posters were expressing a whole spectrum of views, i.e. not "single-visioned".
But you have deemed them "single-visioned", therefore it is you who is "single-visioned", not they.
For fear of repeating myself, I said "How single -visioned SOME people could be" some being the majority...i.e. not all.
The forum wasn't plucked out ouf "cyberspace" on a whim. I was searching for Swinging Websites on google, following on from a thread in the SHM forum...number 7 on the list was that one! whilst we were number 5!!
And for your information I do get it...in fact I get it quite a lot thanks
Sex God
Quote by Fun Scottish Coupleseriously????
Well most members on here don’t view the vanilla world highly,
thats not something that has ever occured to me. i am exactly the same as a vanilla except for the couple of times a year i have sex with other people. i find it hard to understand what it is about vanillas that would make swingers dislike them. after all, we are all vanillas most of the time.
Ecky thump!
We're all a bunch of middle aged moral free saddo's in crappy relationships with partners we don't love & respect. And by rights, we should all be walking sideways!
Seriously, thanks for posting that. I've read lots of the pages,and it's really intriguing to see all the stuff you just know people say/think- consolidated into one thread.
With the exception of a couple of posters (easy to spot the swingers!) most people seem to have pre-concieved ideas which are waaaaay off the mark. It makes for fascinating reading, and I expect it's gonna keep me from my decorating for the rest of the afternoon!
IMHO, I'd consider them, mostly, to be ill informed. Very few were being really judgemental. However, until theres a law against spouting off about stuff you know nowt about (:shock let 'em get on with it! :giggle:
We're all a bunch of middle aged moral free saddo's in crappy relationships with partners we don't love & respect. And by rights, we should all be walking sideways!
Seriously, thanks for posting that. I've read lots of the pages,and it's really intriguing to see all the stuff you just know people say/think- consolidated into one thread.
With the exception of a couple of posters (easy to spot the swingers!) most people seem to have pre-concieved ideas which are waaaaay off the mark. It makes for fascinating reading, and I expect it's gonna keep me from my decorating for the rest of the afternoon!
IMHO, I'd consider them, mostly, to be ill informed. Very few were being really judgemental. However, until theres a law against spouting off about stuff you know nowt about (:shock
let 'em get on with it! :giggle: 
Sex God
Quote by well_busty_babeseriously????
Well most members on here don’t view the vanilla world highly,
thats not something that has ever occured to me. i am exactly the same as a vanilla except for the couple of times a year i have sex with other people. i find it hard to understand what it is about vanillas that would make swingers dislike them. after all, we are all vanillas most of the time.
My thoughts exactly, WBB - I don't this "them and us" mentality at all. I don't even use the V word.
Sex God
hello mt north! not seen you for ages, but not sure if its cos i have not been here or you have not! xxx
Sex God
Quote by well_busty_babe
hello mt north! not seen you for ages, but not sure if its cos i have not been here or you have not! xxx
Hi there WBB - you're not around so often, I think - good to see you.
I don't post vast amounts, but I'm always hanging around here - this is my equivalent of the street corner!
For me, Non-Swingers or Vanilla's (what ever you want to call them)won't ever be willing to accept another lifestyle unless you just give them the facts and let them make their own minds up. To try to badger them into accepting the Swinging lifestyle through any other means just won't work. (and I'm not saying that anyone here is trying to do such a thing - I'm just saying that some people do....)
Quote by well_busty_babeseriously????
Well most members on here don’t view the vanilla world highly,
thats not something that has ever occured to me. i am exactly the same as a vanilla except for the couple of times a year i have sex with other people. i find it hard to understand what it is about vanillas that would make swingers dislike them. after all, we are all vanillas most of the time.
no not seriously! what i was getting at is that both are just labels and we're all one of the same with different beliefs/preferences, but you chose to quote just the start of the sentence? But its nice to see your both, that was my point, so why do people on here post frequently regarding these so called vanillas? But as for the so called vanilla world, we still live in a society who call females slags, sluts, whores or worse for being liberated or choose to sleep around, so do you honestly think this percentage of people will welcome swingers with open arms and respect??? Hence the "take it with a pinch of salt"
i was sitting in work a few months back when i over heard a conversation about swinging... and it was the typical Stereo type of, keys in the center of the room bollocks... i was dying to pluck up the corrage and tell them a few facts about the world of swinging.. but i though i best not... for a start i don't think any one at work would belive the other side of me. i'm too "sweet and innocent" to know of such things! :twisted:
Sex God
It is always the "sweet and innocent" ones you know!
Suppose a woman successfully has sex with a series of men or women in the conventional singles/dating world. She carefully selects them so that the encounters are completely discreet, and her partners don't hit on her and there's a mutual parting. All nice and neat, no hearts broken etc.
If a single woman joins the swinging world, and proceeds to have a series of partners, she's likely to be hailed as a great success, as she has fulfilled her desires and the conventions of the lifestyle.
Now we often say there's a special mentality to becoming a swinger but how much of this is selective as and when needed?
Most of us have to equate our values from our own upbringing which is predominantly well behaved heterosexuality, designed for monogamous partnering etc. We don't get brought up to be swingers.
So where does all the language we use to explain swinging come from? Most of it becomes confused with conventional ideas and the language that has developed around them. Which makes it confusing at times to explain, and also for conventional ears to accept.
Which is why most people in the vanilla world stick to their misconceptions. They really can't be bothered to fathom it all out, particularly if they have not awakened any interest in the alternatives in life.
If a single woman joins the swinging world, and proceeds to have a series of partners, she's likely to be hailed as a great success, as she has fulfilled her desires and the conventions of the lifestyle.
Now we often say there's a special mentality to becoming a swinger but how much of this is selective as and when needed?
Most of us have to equate our values from our own upbringing which is predominantly well behaved heterosexuality, designed for monogamous partnering etc. We don't get brought up to be swingers.
So where does all the language we use to explain swinging come from? Most of it becomes confused with conventional ideas and the language that has developed around them. Which makes it confusing at times to explain, and also for conventional ears to accept.
Which is why most people in the vanilla world stick to their misconceptions. They really can't be bothered to fathom it all out, particularly if they have not awakened any interest in the alternatives in life.
Sex God
Quote by duncanlondon
...
Most of us have to equate our values from our own upbringing which is predominantly well behaved heterosexuality, designed for monogamous partnering etc. We don't get brought up to be swingers.
So where does all the language we use to explain swinging come from? Most of it becomes confused with conventional ideas and the language that has developed around them. Which makes it confusing at times to explain, and also for conventional ears to accept.
...
A man comes back from the dead. A freind asks him 'What is it like to be dead' He replies we can not talk about that, we have no mutual experience to base the conversation on. His freind says you mean I have to die to talk about it.
So I have seen Star Trek, condemn me.
Quote by
...
Most of us have to equate our values from our own upbringing which is predominantly well behaved heterosexuality, designed for monogamous partnering etc. We don't get brought up to be swingers.
So where does all the language we use to explain swinging come from? Most of it becomes confused with conventional ideas and the language that has developed around them. Which makes it confusing at times to explain, and also for conventional ears to accept.
...
A man comes back from the dead. A freind asks him 'What is it like to be dead' He replies we can not talk about that, we have no mutual experience to base the conversation on. His friend says you mean I have to die to talk about it.
OO eerrr that's a bit spooky, but I think I know what you mean
Sex God
Quote by Fridayiminlove
It is always the "sweet and innocent" ones you know!
Damn right it is. It is the ones you least expect, shy & maybe even slightly prudish and unbeknownst to the vanilla world they are deep into the scene.
I have been thinking about this.
This is the answer, my answer;
We do not feel we have anything to prove. So why boast about it. Others who think the world expects them to be more sexually active, harder or what every. They have to say what they have done (mostly they have not) to who, just to prove 'themselves'. Those with the confidence of experience do not.
...and yes I am slightly prudish.
Sex God
A man comes back from the dead. A freind asks him 'What is it like to be dead' He replies we can not talk about that, we have no mutual experience to base the conversation on. His freind says you mean I have to die to talk about it.
So I have seen Star Trek, condemn me.
I dont get it?
A man comes back from australia. A friend asks him "what it was like to be in Australia". He replies, we cannot talk about that as we have no mutual experience to base the conversation on. His friend says "you mean i need to go to Australia to talk about it".
His friend replies " yeah, you must go to Australia before we talk about it"
To which he replies "Stop being a tosser and tell me how it was, i quite clearly do not need a mutual experience to be able to listen to how it was"
to which his friend replies " sorry, i heard something like that on star trek once and it sounded quite mysterious and wonderful. Thought i would emulate my heroes by using it myself, even though its pure gash, live long and prosper"
So I have seen Star Trek, condemn me.
I dont get it?
A man comes back from australia. A friend asks him "what it was like to be in Australia". He replies, we cannot talk about that as we have no mutual experience to base the conversation on. His friend says "you mean i need to go to Australia to talk about it".
His friend replies " yeah, you must go to Australia before we talk about it"
To which he replies "Stop being a tosser and tell me how it was, i quite clearly do not need a mutual experience to be able to listen to how it was"
to which his friend replies " sorry, i heard something like that on star trek once and it sounded quite mysterious and wonderful. Thought i would emulate my heroes by using it myself, even though its pure gash, live long and prosper"
Sex God
In a world where we are condition to feel anger when our partner has sex with another person, can we understand the conflicting 'joy' when we see our partner having sex? Can we understand it until we feel it?
Australia: is big, full of red sand, steaming jungle and the like. All of which we can all understand. We have a shared language to describe those things.
Australia: is big, full of red sand, steaming jungle and the like. All of which we can all understand. We have a shared language to describe those things.
Sex God
Australia: is big, full of red sand, steaming jungle and the like. All of which we can all understand. We have a shared language to describe those things.
Hmm, thats what australia looks like, the friends question was "what was it like to be in australia?"
And if the problem was that there was not a common vocabulary to describe the feelings when he was dead, then would it not be easier just to say that to the person?
Hmm, thats what australia looks like, the friends question was "what was it like to be in australia?"
And if the problem was that there was not a common vocabulary to describe the feelings when he was dead, then would it not be easier just to say that to the person?
