When we ventured into the lifestyle 7 months ago after many months or talking about it and researched the fors and against. We had it clear in our minds what we were looking for.
As we have been happily married for 21 years and didnt want to risk what I have already.
That was to meet a guy or guys that I connected with on all levels and could become friends with too. After talking to loads over the months we have found a couple of guys we meet and all get on really well with. Having built on a friendship, trust and respect with first. But in doing so feel this isn't always the normal way of doing things.
What are your views?
Do you have sex just for sexs sake?
Do you like to meet a stranger and keep it that way?
Do you like me need to feel a connection before you have sex with someone?
Do you feel to build a friendship could risk your relationship?
Just thought I would ask as we all have our own ways of doing things. And I find the whole swinging scene fasinating by different peoples way of doing things!
Let me know your views!
Thanks
xx
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What do you look for in a swinging partner?
Sex God
For us, there has to be a connection before we could have sex with someone.
Quote by Theladyisaminx
Having built on a friendship, trust and respect with first. But in doing so feel this isn't always the normal way of doing things.
I don't think that there is a normal way of doing things but if there were then your way may be considered as the norm for swinging
What are your views?
Do you have sex just for sexs sake? Yes, Sometimes
Do you like to meet a stranger and keep it that way? Alot of the time, that's how we do it
Do you like me need to feel a connection before you have sex with someone? There's one or two who we have built up that connection first and keep building it
Do you feel to build a friendship could risk your relationship? I don't think that I could ever build up a true friendship, not because I don't want to but because I simply don't have the time too. With family life, vanilla friends etc, that takes up most of my time and to class someone as a true friend I would be abe to see lots of them and get to know them really well and I don't think I would have time to do that with a swinging friend. I also hope that it would never ruin our relationship, infact, I would never let it get that far
Louise xx
xx
Quote by louise_and_joe
Having built on a friendship, trust and respect with first. But in doing so feel this isn't always the normal way of doing things.
I don't think that there is a normal way of doing things but if there were then your way may be considered as the norm for swinging
What are your views?
Do you have sex just for sexs sake? Yes, Sometimes
Do you like to meet a stranger and keep it that way? Alot of the time, that's how we do it
Do you like me need to feel a connection before you have sex with someone? There's one or two who we have built up that connection first and keep building it
Do you feel to build a friendship could risk your relationship? I don't think that I could ever build up a true friendship, not because I don't want to but because I simply don't have the time too. With family life, vanilla friends etc, that takes up most of my time and to class someone as a true friend I would be abe to see lots of them and get to know them really well and I don't think I would have time to do that with a swinging friend. I also hope that it would never ruin our relationship, infact, I would never let it get that far
Louise xx
Louise I totally agree with your comments on friendships...I suppose what I am trying to say about a swinging friendship is fining someone that you believe is being honest with you, and that you can trust their honesty.
After reading back my posting seems I am being a little serious! I take the whole swinging thing as a lot of fun and laughter with the right kind of people
xx
Sex God
Quote by Theladyisaminx
When we ventured into the lifestyle 7 months ago after many months or talking about it and researched the fors and against. We had it clear in our minds what we were looking for.
As we have been happily married for 21 years and didnt want to risk what I have already.
That was to meet a guy or guys that I connected with on all levels and could become friends with too. After talking to loads over the months we have found a couple of guys we meet and all get on really well with. Having built on a friendship, trust and respect with first. But in doing so feel this isn't always the normal way of doing things.
What are your views?
I think louise has said what i was about to far better than I could...
I don't think there is any such thing as a "normal" way to approach swinging..... if the way that you decide to go about things works for you then good for you, not everyone goes about it the same way, and if they did what a boring thing it would be....
Do you have sex just for sexs sake?
I have done in the past, as i admitted in the other thread going...do i now, no! older, wiser and what I look for in swinging has changed from the perception I had when i first started....
Do you like to meet a stranger and keep it that way?
the way I look at things is that a stranger is just a friend I haven't met yet.....
Do you like me need to feel a connection before you have sex with someone?
at least have to know there name first...:lol: seriously, I like to get to know people before i get to that stage, again that is just me rather that anything being construed as normal....
Do you feel to build a friendship could risk your relationship?
not at all.... as long as the ground rules are set out before you start anything.... and you stick to them, then I don't see any problems, I would hate to think I was the cause of anyone splitting up......
Just thought I would ask as we all have our own ways of doing things. And I find the whole swinging scene fasinating by different peoples way of doing things!
Let me know your views!
Thanks
xx
Sex God
Quote by Theladyisaminx
When we ventured into the lifestyle 7 months ago after many months or talking about it and researched the fors and against. We had it clear in our minds what we were looking for.
As we have been happily married for 21 years and didnt want to risk what I have already.
That was to meet a guy or guys that I connected with on all levels and could become friends with too. After talking to loads over the months we have found a couple of guys we meet and all get on really well with. Having built on a friendship, trust and respect with first. But in doing so feel this isn't always the normal way of doing things.
What are your views?
Do you have sex just for sexs sake?
No because the time has to feel right
Do you like to meet a stranger and keep it that way? When we swing with people we prefer to keep the friendship going if it was good time
Do you like me need to feel a connection before you have sex with someone? Oh definately, I can't just randomly pick someone or a couple cos we just might no click or have anything in common
Do you feel to build a friendship could risk your relationship?
I've often thought about this. In the rare occasions when we meet single men, I always choose them. This is based on many things, particularly personality. I also like to choose men round my age (25) but I do often think "what if the mr thinks that I'm going to fancy them?". I've spoke about this to the mr and he always says that our relationship is so rock solid and personally, I feel so safe and secure with the Mr., I wouldn't want anyone to come in between this. I feel really pleased that the Mr trusts me enough that I wouldn't develop lust for other guys
Just thought I would ask as we all have our own ways of doing things. And I find the whole swinging scene fasinating by different peoples way of doing things!
Let me know your views!
Thanks
xx
When we ventured into the lifestyle 7 months ago after many months or talking about it and researched the fors and against. We had it clear in our minds what we were looking for.
As we have been happily married for 21 years and didnt want to risk what I have already.
That was to meet a guy or guys that I connected with on all levels and could become friends with too. After talking to loads over the months we have found a couple of guys we meet and all get on really well with. Having built on a friendship, trust and respect with first. But in doing so feel this isn't always the normal way of doing things.
What are your views?
Do you have sex just for sexs sake?
No because the time has to feel right
Do you like to meet a stranger and keep it that way? When we swing with people we prefer to keep the friendship going if it was good time
Do you like me need to feel a connection before you have sex with someone? Oh definately, I can't just randomly pick someone or a couple cos we just might no click or have anything in common
Do you feel to build a friendship could risk your relationship?
I've often thought about this. In the rare occasions when we meet single men, I always choose them. This is based on many things, particularly personality. I also like to choose men round my age (25) but I do often think "what if the mr thinks that I'm going to fancy them?". I've spoke about this to the mr and he always says that our relationship is so rock solid and personally, I feel so safe and secure with the Mr., I wouldn't want anyone to come in between this. I feel really pleased that the Mr trusts me enough that I wouldn't develop lust for other guys
I agree totally with your last comments, if your relationship is solid I feel there is not threat as long as the guys you see realise this to. Then all understand the limits and happy fun times are had by all.
As we have been happily married for 21 years and didnt want to risk what I have already.
That was to meet a guy or guys that I connected with on all levels and could become friends with too. After talking to loads over the months we have found a couple of guys we meet and all get on really well with. Having built on a friendship, trust and respect with first. But in doing so feel this isn't always the normal way of doing things.
What are your views?
Do you have sex just for sexs sake?
No because the time has to feel right
Do you like to meet a stranger and keep it that way? When we swing with people we prefer to keep the friendship going if it was good time
Do you like me need to feel a connection before you have sex with someone? Oh definately, I can't just randomly pick someone or a couple cos we just might no click or have anything in common
Do you feel to build a friendship could risk your relationship?
I've often thought about this. In the rare occasions when we meet single men, I always choose them. This is based on many things, particularly personality. I also like to choose men round my age (25) but I do often think "what if the mr thinks that I'm going to fancy them?". I've spoke about this to the mr and he always says that our relationship is so rock solid and personally, I feel so safe and secure with the Mr., I wouldn't want anyone to come in between this. I feel really pleased that the Mr trusts me enough that I wouldn't develop lust for other guys
I agree totally with your last comments, if your relationship is solid I feel there is not threat as long as the guys you see realise this to. Then all understand the limits and happy fun times are had by all.
Sex God
Yeah I couldn't agree more. In my opinion, I believe that u have to have some form of "rock-solidness" in ur relationship to be in this scene.
Miss Cream xxx
PS I hope the comments people have put have helped you
Miss Cream xxx
PS I hope the comments people have put have helped you
Sex God
Quote by Theladyisaminx
What are your views?
Do you have sex just for sexs sake?
I have done, it really does depend on the circumstances of the meet, I have had a few really raunchy and sexually intense ‘one night stands’ for want of a better description, but also had some fantastic experiences with women who I took time to get to know.
Do you like to meet a stranger and keep it that way?
Again, this all depends on the situation
Do you like me need to feel a connection before you have sex with someone?
Yes, but what’s your definition of ‘connection’ and are you including any sort of time span involved with it? I’ll try to explain, although I have answered your first question in the affirmative, there was always a feeling of connection, but one that was very quickly established over a short period of time, say a chance meeting in a restaurant or hotel, or even in the street. I remember one occasion where the mutual attraction / connection was almost instant with just one look across a crowded bar room we knew instantly that we were going to get it on that night. Cliché I know but true never the less.
Do you feel to build a friendship could risk your relationship?
Yes, without a doubt :lol2: sorry I shouldn’t laugh but I can see the funny side of it now. As a few of the old sweats on here will know, I was married for 30 years, we got into the lifestyle about 6 years ago and had a lot of great fun, then we met a guy, yes off this site with whom we became really friendly, well long story short I’ve been single for just over a year now, you can guess the rest.
Just thought I would ask as we all have our own ways of doing things. And I find the whole swinging scene fasinating by different peoples way of doing things!
I’m with you on this one, and love reading these kind of threads as it gives you a real insight into how people perceive the whole idea of swinging and partnerships. Good thread made interesting reading :thumbup:
Let me know your views!
Thanks
xx
Sex God
Quote by LondonPlaything
arse
lp
:shock: I beg your pardon
Quote by Pete_sw
arse
lp
:shock: I beg your pardon
oops... not directed at you Mr Pete.
a rather simple answer to the thread's question;
What do you look for in a Swing Partner?
answer:
arse
other body parts, combinations thereof may be put into consideration... also humour, intelect and emotional atraction can be considered.. at least I may say that, should I wish to be considered a more rounded human being... though I fear my chances of that ever actually happening are indeed very very slim
lp
Sex God
Quote by LondonPlaything
arse
lp
:shock: I beg your pardon
oops... not directed at you Mr Pete.
a rather simple answer to the thread's question;
What do you look for in a Swing Partner?
answer:
arse
other body parts, combinations thereof may be put into consideration... also humour, intelect and emotional atraction can be considered.. at least I may say that, should I wish to be considered a more rounded human being... though I fear my chances of that ever actually happening are indeed very very slim
lp
you crack me up LP :cheers: Quote by Pete_sw
What are your views?
Do you have sex just for sexs sake?
I have done, it really does depend on the circumstances of the meet, I have had a few really raunchy and sexually intense ‘one night stands’ for want of a better description, but also had some fantastic experiences with women who I took time to get to know.
Do you like to meet a stranger and keep it that way?
Again, this all depends on the situation
Do you like me need to feel a connection before you have sex with someone?
Yes, but what’s your definition of ‘connection’ and are you including any sort of time span involved with it? I’ll try to explain, although I have answered your first question in the affirmative, there was always a feeling of connection, but one that was very quickly established over a short period of time, say a chance meeting in a restaurant or hotel, or even in the street. I remember one occasion where the mutual attraction / connection was almost instant with just one look across a crowded bar room we knew instantly that we were going to get it on that night. Cliché I know but true never the less.
Do you feel to build a friendship could risk your relationship?
Yes, without a doubt :lol2: sorry I shouldn’t laugh but I can see the funny side of it now. As a few of the old sweats on here will know, I was married for 30 years, we got into the lifestyle about 6 years ago and had a lot of great fun, then we met a guy, yes off this site with whom we became really friendly, well long story short I’ve been single for just over a year now, you can guess the rest.
Just thought I would ask as we all have our own ways of doing things. And I find the whole swinging scene fasinating by different peoples way of doing things!
I’m with you on this one, and love reading these kind of threads as it gives you a real insight into how people perceive the whole idea of swinging and partnerships. Good thread made interesting reading :thumbup:
Let me know your views!
Thanks
xx
Thanks for your honest answers as asking such questions makes one think. By thinking and listening to other view points hopefully helps us understand too. It is sad it split your marriage as I have always said can take years to love, and minutes to lust. If you dont understand the different this lifestyle could become the end of a realtionship. That is just my view!
Sexpert
Connection and friendship.
If you have total trust and a strong relationship to begin with, there is no threat.
If you have total trust and a strong relationship to begin with, there is no threat.
Sex God
Quote by AshaandAlex
Connection and friendship.
If you have total trust and a strong relationship to begin with, there is no threat.
Granted, but how do you really know?
I thought our relationship was rock solid. Don't get me wrong, we had our ups and downs as does every relationship, but we had been through so much together over a 30 year period that i was sure we were destined to end our lives together. You see we were not just partners, but soul mates too.
It's easy, and possibly more comfortable to say, 'ah but there must have been a major problem for one partner to leave the other' , perhaps not so easy, or comfortable in this lifestyle to think and take into account that hey, in this lifestyle it's part of the risk. In fact I would go so far as to say its quite naive to think otherwise.
IMHO
Sex God
Quote by firelizard
I want them to be sexy, funny and discreet
:thumbup: That goes for me too.
Sex God
Quote by MrsFC
I want them to be sexy, funny and discreet
:thumbup: That goes for me too.
Yep... sounds good to me too!
Nola x
Quote by Pete_sw
Connection and friendship.
If you have total trust and a strong relationship to begin with, there is no threat.
Granted, but how do you really know?
I thought our relationship was rock solid. Don't get me wrong, we had our ups and downs as does every relationship, but we had been through so much together over a 30 year period that i was sure we were destined to end our lives together. You see we were not just partners, but soul mates too.
It's easy, and possibly more comfortable to say, 'ah but there must have been a major problem for one partner to leave the other' , perhaps not so easy, or comfortable in this lifestyle to think and take into account that hey, in this lifestyle it's part of the risk. In fact I would go so far as to say its quite naive to think otherwise.
IMHO
totally agree with ya Pete... you just never know whats round corner, as my granny used to say! And it certainly does happen..... Ive had irate partners in my pm box!
:? Plus... Ive been there meself! Wouldnt wish it on anyone! 