Whatever gave you that idea?

10 Dec 2003

Ermmm, right. I have been re-reading the threads from last night and the last few days (great fun by the way everyone!! lol

).
It seems that one or two people seem to think that there is something between Sappho and me :shock: . Whatever gave you that idea? dunno

I am very flattered of course ( redface

), but have you thought about the effect this may have on her? The poor sweet girl (for such, I am sure, she is) must be mortified.
For the record, I should state that we are hundreds of miles apart and have never so much as clapped eyes on each other sad

. I am quite sure that we haven't said or done anything in here that could possibly have given any other impression.
So have a good day everyone and let's have no more groundless speculation about a (I am sure) charming muse from the North West countryside and a balding, boring, bard from Berkshire (dammit, alliterating again!! evil

).
Now. Time for some work.

10 Dec 2003

:bs:
Need I say more Will?
:love: :love: :love: :love: :love: :love: :love: :love:
We all know about you and Sappho.
YOU TOLD US!!! :love:
Love ya!
Wilma
x x x x
By the way - it is very sweet and we are all jealous. lol

10 Dec 2003

YOU TOLD US!!!

WHEN?????
I tell you, we've never met! Don't suppose she's even noticed me. rolleyes

10 Dec 2003

Quote by willxx69
YOU TOLD US!!!

WHEN?????
I tell you, we've never met! Don't suppose she's even noticed me. rolleyes

Oh I think she's noticed you Will lol

We all have, it's just that Sappho gets first dibs.
Love
Wilma
:love: :love: :love:

10 Dec 2003

Wilma wrote:

Sappho gets first dibs.

Oh, that's lovely! But I'm also willing to share! I'm that kind of girl.
:angel:
*Considers: chance would be a fine bloody thing. Would love to get my hands on his quill pen.*

10 Dec 2003

Quote by Sappho
*Considers: chance would be a fine bloody thing. Would love to get my hands on his quill pen.*

Ah, a fine tool - which can be very useful, whichever way up you care to use it lol

.
Mal

10 Dec 2003

Actually I think you will find it was Sappho herself that told us

Quote by Sappho
Sappho loves you, Will
PS: Don't forget your magic flute, will you?

And then there was this:

Quote by Sappho
I have cosseted, caressed, comforted and cajoled and where has it got me?

You know your alliteration drives me wild - and where has it got you? My undying devotion, that's where!

All in all, not too bad a package surely?

And you didn't even mention your creativity either.
redface

I'll give you all the soothing you need, darling. Just tell me where to lay my hands.
Sappho xxx

10 Dec 2003

.......and I thought we'd been so discreet too. rolleyes

10 Dec 2003

Don't suppose she's even noticed me.

Going fishing Will? wink

lhk
Kat

10 Dec 2003

Quote by KitKat
Going fishing Will?

Hope he don't land an old trout! :shock:

10 Dec 2003

Hope he don't land an old trout!

Or a red snapper. rolleyes

10 Dec 2003

Quote by KitKat
Hope he don't land an old trout!

Or a red snapper. rolleyes

Or crabs!! lol

x xx

10 Dec 2003

Hope he don't land an old trout!
Or a red snapper.
Or crabs!!

Or a Sea Hag

10 Dec 2003

Hope he don't land an old trout!
Or a red snapper
Or crabs!!
Or a Sea Hag

Or a Dogfish

10 Dec 2003

he don't land an old trout!
Or a red snapper
Or crabs!!
Or a Sea Hag
Or a Dogfish

hm, monkfish might be appropriate though wink

10 Dec 2003

With Will's charm I am certain he will catch a beautiful mermaid in his net.
Love Ya Will
Wilma
x x x x

11 Dec 2003

Kat wrote:

Going fishing Will?

Of course!! wink

. Now that I have done that I was just about to put my fishing rod away when it occurred to me that bluexxx or Jags might be able to find a use for it with Fred all trussed up like a gay turkey (You know, he's actually enjoying all this pink fluffy stuff!! :shock: ). I'll just change this nice shiny hook for an old rusty one before I hand it over. Far more possibilities there :twisted: .
Fred wrote:

Hope he don't land an old trout!

Or a Dogfish

You really are in no position to wind me up, Fred. :twisted: Goes and chats to the girls to tell them that the candle wax isn't nearly hot enough yet and suggests mixing it with oil to increase the boiling point some more.
Kat wrote:

Or a red snapper.

Or a Sea Hag

monkfish might be appropriate though

There'll be punishment for you too. Trouble is, all my creativity is being channelled elsewhere at present ( wink

) so I will need to hand you over to someone else. I am sure that Jags would be able to think of something to do with you!!! :twisted: :twisted: Wraps up Kat in Christmas paper and sends him to Jags as a pressie.
Which reminds me....... SLAP for Jags.
Sorry, in case you didn't hear that SLAP for JAGS!!!
Jags wrote:

Or crabs!!

Most unbecoming of you my dear! I expected better of you!
Wilma wrote:

With Will's charm I am certain he will catch a beautiful mermaid in his net.

Awww, Wilma! How sweet of you!! And can I say how much more radiant you are looking with Fred out of the way. I'll be over to tuck you in later on. kiss

Thinks : Kit's on her own while Kat is at the mercy of Jags and her sharpened talents and filed talons. Wilma is on her own while Fred is in his padded cell so hopelessly deranged that he thinks his hospital gown is a pink nighty, the restraints are fluffy handcuffs and the hospital food is haute cuisine. A very sad case. Sappho is her usual sweet and articulate self. Things are not looking so bad!

11 Dec 2003

I can hold my tongue no longer!! :taz:
I challenge thee to a duel for the affections of the fair Sappho. I cannot stand idly by whilst such a fair maiden is being wooed by a spineless, pinny wearing quill pusher. :twisted:
Choose your weapon!! :evil2:
(And don't give me any of that "the pen is mightier than the sword :bs: ".......stand up like a man!!)

11 Dec 2003

Now this is more like it!! :happy: :happy:
I knew those years of fencing lessons at school were not a waste wink

. I have been waiting for an opportunity to put my experience as County Champion three years running into practice.
You and Fred may be perfectly happy fighting women but I have never needed to stoop so low - and I wasn't going to start for YOUR sake. Man to man, sword to sword is much more my style.
Now then, weapons!!! We needn't bother with the epee, they have that annoying little button thing on the end that prevents you from piercing your opponent's woman-bashing lily liver evil

!! Sabres or rapiers - you choose. Makes no odds to me! :twisted:
Roll-up ladies!!! Tickets available for Will v SteveG for the ardent affections of the divine and demure damsel Sappho.
By the way, it's OK mate: you won't need the mask - I promise not to scar your face wink

. BUT YOUR COD-PIECE IS GOING TO COME IN FOR SOME SERIOUS DAMAGE.
Now, have at ye! Ye scurvy knave. :taz: :evil2: :evil2: evil

:twisted:
(Oh yes - this is definitely a lot more fun!! Take that! evil

And that!!! :boxing: )

11 Dec 2003

This I have gotta see!
*Throws bag at Will's feet* - "Here, your spine, you might need it!" :shock:
If you have choice of weapons Steve here take these.
*Hands Steve 2 two-handed swords measuring 5' and weighing 10lb* 8)
That will stop al his poofy footwork and dancing! lol

Don't cut yourself Will! :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:

11 Dec 2003

Think Will needs a hand to lift it up - can one of you girlies help him?
rotflmao

11 Dec 2003

Quote by Will
Man to man, sword to sword is much more my style.

I donâ€™t know where you find the impudence good sir. mad

What is this I see before me?? The vision of a â€œmanâ€ in pantaloons and an ornate frilly pinny has my seconds doubled with laughter! You are an abomination sir, an insult to the eyesight! And you call yourself a man?? :shock:
Stand guard, Iâ€™ll have you chasing the affections of the fair Sappho no longer.

Quote by Will
Sabres or rapiers - you choose. Makes no odds to me!

â€œYodaâ€¦â€¦â€¦pass me my sabre!!â€ :twisted:

11 Dec 2003

Will - your ruffles are ruffled and for gods sake man stop dancing around you are making me feel giddy! And which one of them girlies gave you those tights to wear!
Oooooohhh - my sides are hurting from laughing!
Steve - an end to this folly sir - kill him and be done - One could die of thirst waiting here. 8)

11 Dec 2003

Steve - Steve - STEVE!
Have you finished playing yet? Come on - it seems Jags has matched you up with the other Steve for another fight. I hope you aint gonna mess about all night with this fighting malarky coz we got some drinking to do and a meet with Dawn later. 8)
Eeeeuuuuuuwwwww - what is that all down your shirt? Did he really have that much blood in him? WOW! :shock:
Come on - stop toying with the poor fella - take the ladies colours and let's get out of here.
What? Nah - leave him - let him recover - gives you another chance later to goad him and let him start another fight?
Me - nah - won't bother giving him a kick - might get blood on my fluffy slippers and Jas will be upset with me if I get them dirty again - did it last night when I was out looking for Dawn - boy did she give me hell this morning at bath time - would only stay in the bath with me for 20 minutes!

11 Dec 2003

Fred wrote:

Hands Steve 2 two-handed swords measuring 5' and weighing 10lb

10lb. Is that all? rotflmao

How little you know me sir!!!
Haven't used two-handeds as light as that since I fought as an intermediate at 14!!!
Fred - if you hadn't spent years getting the girls to lift your beer cans for you, you might be more up to it.
Steve wrote:

Yodaâ€¦â€¦â€¦pass me my sabre!!

What!! you're going to get a green muppet to help you now? This is going to be even easier than I thought!!! rotflmao

Fred wrote:

Eeeeuuuuuuwwwww - what is that all down your shirt? Did he really have that much blood in him?

No, Steve just cut himself trying to unsheath his sword. And that stuff on his trousers is where he wet himself when I said 'boo!!'.
Besides, I am not taking lectures in masculinity from a guy in a backless nightie and pink fluffy slippers!! Mind you don't trip over as you run away, Fred.
Right - that's that sorted then. Scarcely worth the effort really.

11 Dec 2003

SLAPS ALL THE BOYS AND PUTS THEM ALL IN DIFFERENT CORNERS!!! WILL - up against the blackboard. FRED - you go face the wall - STEVE - you wait in the corner!!
Now.. who started this?
Who's sabre is this?
Do I need to call your mothers???
Veteran of Y10s into action!

11 Dec 2003

Good job you came when you did, they were both quivering wrecks. Honestly guys, needed a woman to save you again!!! :twisted:
Jags wrote:

WILL - up against the blackboard

Oh Jags, I have always wanted you to have me up against the blackboard!!! :twisted: lol

11 Dec 2003

Quote by Jags
SLAPS ALL THE BOYS AND PUTS THEM ALL IN DIFFERENT CORNERS!!! WILL - up against the blackboard. FRED - you go face the wall - STEVE - you wait in the corner!!
Now.. who started this?
Who's sabre is this?
Do I need to call your mothers???
Veteran of Y10s into action!

Mattmoleman enters the room in a black and grey leather kilt, white shirt unbuttoned and a school cap.
Here you are Jags, Hands Jags the mistress a nice ripe apple of the day, I have left my homework where you wanted it, if there is anything else I can do for Ms Jags please let me know.
Sniggers at the naughty boys for being caught as he walks out of the room

11 Dec 2003

Quote by willxx69
Good job you came when you did, they were both quivering wrecks. Honestly guys, needed a woman to save you again!!! :twisted:
Jags wrote:WILL - up against the blackboard

Oh Jags, I have always wanted you to have me up against the blackboard!!! :twisted: lol

I can't possibly reward bad behaviour Will - you need to show me that you can behave and deserve my attention!!

11 Dec 2003

Matt - now you've got the right idea - as long as the apple is green!
Hope Matt knows I can spot a goodie two-shoes a mile off!!