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What's in a name ?

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Aaron - ugly but hung like a horse, prone to belly button fluff.
Adam - cute, funny, chicks dig him, has the potential to be stalked.
Adrian - small todger, probably gay.
Alan - shy but sensitive, gets screwed over by women.
Alex - cute but a liar and a cheater.
Amir - dirty, smelly, pecker is minuscule.
Andrew - usually short and very horny, watches cartoons.
Antonio - has a great body and beautiful skin, and chicken brain.
Anthony - great guy and kind to all girls, smells of wee.
Arnold - loser.
Arthur - hung like a slave and celibate.
Ashley - wanker who's losing his hair.
Barry - lights fires, pinches girl's bottoms and is well hung.
Ben - kind hearted, will do anything for the one he loves.
Bert - looks like he has been pulled through a hedge backwards and chews with his mouth open.
Bob - quiet and unpopular, eats with his hands.
Brad - thinks everyone likes him... but they don't.
Brandon - good looking but uses girls.
Brendan - quiet and sweet, gets beaten up all the time.
Brett - worldwide slut and really insensitive, women love him.
Brian - a wanna be charmer, he's not the Messiah he's just a very, very naughty boy.
Bryan - sexy, but stupid
Bronsen - annoying and never grows up
Bruce - stinks bad and thinks everyone else's name is also Bruce.
Bryce - fun to be with and will make you laugh, you'll kill him within a week.
Calvin - immature in a naive way, drives a Gemini.
Cameron - Australian, like Bruce.
Carl - thinks he's funny... he's not, falls asleep during sex.
Carson - fun to be around and really sensitive.
Chad - cute, sensitive and very studly
Charles - can't trust him, eyes too close together.
Chris - can't pull, will pay for women, but has a huge pecker and can use it too.
Christopher - soppy and too clingy to make a relationship last. Spends most of his life drunk and kisses like a washing machine.
Christian - very sexy and seductive, full of his self.
Clark - hilarious and always in trouble, problem with 'jailbait'.
Clive - very sweet and adores girls, but prefers to watch.
Cole - nice, funny, and fun to be around.
Colin - lies to women and blows up public buildings.
Cory - funny but ugly, ends up running fashion magazines.
Craig - the lights on but no ones at home.
Damon - total loser in a sweaty sort of way.
Dan - quiet but funny, but becomes easily addicted to narcotics.
Dane - weird but can hold together a conversation with a mermaid.
Daniel - sweetest guy in the world,soft and gentle but good in bed! hes a keeper!!!!!!
Darren - charming, but sleeps with men.
Daryl - smells bad, has no real mates.
David - hottie and works out a lot, loves girls named Florence. Can be gay!
Dave - extremely sexy, always funny, intelligent, stylish, trendsetter i.e. a wanker.
Dean - full of himself and thinks with his ****.
Dennis - either very nice to girls or a faggot.
Derek - has a great sense of humour, and blow
Dominic - hilarious and will do anything to please.
Don - dickhead.
Doug - has a greasy face, drinking problem and farts.
Drew - bad
Duncan - hopeless ski bum, brains shot away long ago.
Dylan - horny bastard, who can't sing.
Dwayne - cool guy to be around if you can handle his name.
Eddie - wants too many chicks he'll never get 'cos he's an arsehole.
Elliott - full of himself.
Eric - shy.
Ewan - a little slow but sweet, sexy, and model mental patient.
Frank - "different"
Fred - sucks pig's dicks & swallows the lot.
Gareth - sweet but dresses too good to be straight.
Gary - dreams about mud wrestling girls. drug addict but willing to share.
Gavin - likes bondage, S&M with other men.
Geoff - prefers golf to sex and war to peace.
George - barman who drinks more than he serves, treats girls like s*** also a wanker.
Glen - the sweetest guy
Graeme - very hard to understand, likes group sex.
Graham - will screw anything.
Grant - HORNY! But so sweet and you can talk to him about anything.
Greg - really sweet and feels sorry for himself.
Harry - has back hair.
Harvey - cute, but addicted to sex and/or drugs.
Hathem - smooth, but manipulative, not to bet trusted around young girls.
Hayden - tries hard.
Henry - has gay like movements frequently. likes to run every where. would screw welli boots.
Howard - likes small breasts
Ian - really popular but knows all the girls want him... yeah right!
Ivor - militant psychopath with homosexual tendencies.
Jack - stupid but hot, always alright.
Jake - shy and sweet but a slut when drunk.
Jamie - scum of the earth.
James - built like a horse. likes to bite while kissing.
Jason - big headed. never fails to grab the girls attention, full of bullshit.
Jay - very sweet when you get to know him well.
Jeff - really ugly.
Jerome - gay, but very unhappy.
Jeremy - loud and thinks that he's all that he says he is.
Jesse - unpopular and needs to move on.
Jim - sweet, has fantasies of love and affection.
Joe - built like a bear, sexy but tends to lose his head.
Joel - arse.
John - has no friends or life
Jolyon - absolute raving homosexual.
Jon - has serious disabilities. also takes it up the butt
Jonathon - loud, sex mad and great with it
Jordan - sexy but weird in bed.
Jose - hot boy with a love of hermaphrodites.
Josh - full of himself, fun.
Junior - hottie and totally good at football.
Justin - aggravating but loveable, insecure but successful.
Judith - Eats a lot, likes to feel superior.
Kain - the sexiest guy alive but very stuck up.
Kane - an absolute and complete arsehole.
Kevin - always attracts really fit girlfriends. Also has a large penis.
Keith - good person to talk to when you have a problem
Kenneth - very, very...anything you want him to be.
Kurt - can kick anyone's arse.
Kyle - hornball who eats too many corn chips.
Lance - Plays with his penis cos no one else will.
Larry - cute but wannabe player with big arse.
Laurie - short and funny looking.
Lee - girl dressed up as a boy, total arse bandit.
Lewis - lonely, sad git, bit of a tosser.
Lyndon - can always be found in bed or in the pub.
Liam - loud mouthed arsehole.
Lorenzo - fine and dresses in stolen gold.
Lucas - fat loser that dates other men.
Luke - seems to be sweet. bit of a tosser though.
Malcolm - tall man who tends to lose his trousers.
Marc - an idiot, who can't spell. would do anything for sex.
Mark - wished girls liked him for who he is not his great looks, mouthy bastard.
Matt - likes drink and is full of s***.
Mathew - has less brains than a donkey does in one of it's hoofs. Thinks constantly about porn.
Michael - very good looking but he'll do anything for a girl.
Mick - always drunk, tendency for drug abuse.
Mike - shag muffin.
Mohammed - small penis.
Morgan - the only thing that is big is his ego.
Nathan - stupid as hell, and tends to make others feel dumb.
Nick - nice
Neil - sweet and will do anything in this world for you, great in bed.
Oliver - likes men but is in denial.
Oscar - loser.
Owen - cute gay guy who is immature, and sings Welsh songs.
Patrick - drunk, drunk, drunk.
Paul - cool, calm and handsome, a quality only found in gays.
Peter - cutie but very shy, makes women feel like virgins.
Phillip - stupid idiot who wishes he were cool.
Rhys - great lover but had his mind stolen by aliens a long, long time ago.
Richard - can't see his feet as balls are too big.
Ricky - ugly shithead who everybody hates.
Rikki - the f^$king greatest in the world, everyone loves this guy... no faults at all.
Rob - constantly watches porn.
Ron - spends most of his time looking at the base of his spine, when his head is up his own arse.
Roy - total loser and computer genius.
Rupert - arrogant twat who is crap in bed but thinks he is a stud.
Russell - likes to play in the leaves, which makes him an arsehole.
Ryan - tall with sexy body and even sexier mind.
Sam - wannabe sex machine.
Scott - .hairy, sensitive and a great shag
Sean - has small testicles and no friends.
Seth - so sweet to other people but is a traitor.
Shane - not very nice, lies to pick faults (changed now)
Shannon - the most determined and persevering sweetie in the world.
Shaun - bit of a hard bastard, thinks women love him.
Simon - likes a night out with the lads and curries. Says he is the man but talks bollocks.
Spencer - loves it right up there, normally with a toilet roll and a hamster.
Steve - popular and funny & hung like a donkey.
Stuart - droll guy with great arse and suicidal tendencies but great in bed.
Ted - hcountless two timer and bully
Teddy - great friend, crap boyfriend. clowns have been known to look more stylish.
Tim - hot but a bit strange, can never tell where he is.
Toby - best blow ever.
Tom - extremely arrogant.
Tommy - no
Tony - hot, sweet, and totally fun to be around, prefers getting done up the arse
Travis - fat and horny with the best Whats in a name... collection to be found.
Trevor - sweet and funny but sometimes untrustworthy.
Troy - cute and popular.
Taylor - happy, laughing hyena.
Warren - cool, homosexual guy.
Wesley - great guy and easy to tolerate.
Will - wishes he were popular.
William - tall, dark and handsom. ie when it's dark, he is handsom and tall.
Zach - sweet and polite and adorable.
Zack - thinks he is superman. great in bed due to ego.
Zahid - devious and sly. Not to be trusted.
Not telling you which ones are accurate to people I know lol :lol:
To complete the set...
WOMEN'S NAMES
Ada blue haired, smells of wee.
Aimee Likes to strut her stuff, though theres not much 2 do so. Likes to play with cheese.
Aimz Like italian breakfast bread rolls. hollow on the inside. would die to screw a lamar.
Aisha laughs like a hyena, fantastic in bed. likes tic
Alexandra Smart kick ass chic.
Alison bra and pants are the same garment, looks better with the light off.
Amanda IQ tends to be smaller than bra size. Probably a good shag though.
Amberley queen of ice, no friends with a nasty mean streak. More than likely a lesbian but
nice teeth
Amy devious, likes being on top, never stays the night
Aimz limited intelligence.
Andrea small breasts, drinks pints.
Angela Vain, hairstyle more important than oxygen. Hangs around toilets.
Anna has eyes bigger than her stomach. but her waistline shows it.
Annabelle doesn't wear knickers.
Annette she's BIG.
Anne looks like a horse, can't drive.
Anouska shags like a rabbit, not fussy about appearance.
Beatie she would rather jump out of a plane with out a parashoot than having to pick up a
spider.
Belinda pleasing on the eye, usually has a couple of good points.
Beryl repressed alcoholic.
Betty makes simple tasks seem like brain surgery.
Beverley trapped in an eighties timewarp.
Bianca ginger.
Bridgette eats pizzas all day, smokes cigars.
Britney falsely improved, no use to society.
Camilla replaces the word 'yes' with 'ya'.
Carina looks like the back of a bus, doesn't swallow.
Carol into everything you've only ever read about. Coin
Caroline into threesomes. Likes doggy style. Always up for it.
Carly the sexiest bitch in the world!!!!!!
Carli pretty but more mouth and flirting than action in the bedroom.
Casey painful lay, naïve but with a sense of humour, possibly once a man
Catherine attracted to the older man, needs ironing.
Claire perfect in every way and a complete sex goddess.
Celine emits hideous noises, waste of DNA.
Charlotte enjoys tea and cake, can sing the national anthem.
Cheryl can fit hand in mouth, eats glass. Has many ways with the boys
Christina hasn't got much of a life due to being a boring person. likes cammels.
Christine likes men in uniform, never warm.
Claudia highly annoying. finds it hard to keep friends.
Daisy virgin.
Danni should make nice threesome with sibling.
Davina drug induced mental damage, should shave her neck.
Dawn gets up early, smells of chips.
Deborah bites the pillow, uses both hands.
DeeDee cannot understand why no one else masturbates in Ikea.
Denise sits on cat's eyes, wears too much make up.
Diane enjoys company of animals. Deep as a puddle. Adds nothing to society.
Donna 70's throw back, likes cabbage.
Doris purple haired, stinks of wee.
Elaine rides sidesaddle, drinks meths.
Eleanor centre of attention when she walks into a room,not always for the good. has the
gift of gab.
Elizabeth born to perform, hates chickens.
Ellie far too attractive for the swear words that come out of her mouth.
Emily wears odd socks but that doesn't mean shes not cute!
Emma gullible and easily swayed by a good looker!
Estelle likes wombles, eats grass.
Esther plump with sagging breasts, normally heavily tattooed.
Faith legs meet at knees, can't shag standing up.
Faye wears wellies, can't swim.
Felicity she'll stab you with her nipples, plays darts
Fiona female mud wrestler, gives head.
Frances gives oral for a one pence peice. but loves to sow.
Frankie would make it as a farmer. people say she needs to shower more.
Gail farts a lot, drinks Guinness.
Gayleen big tall woman who talks 'bleep' all day.
Gaynor lesbian.
Gem like an arm chair. comfotable, loved, odd.
Gemma practically perfect in everyway. Loved by everyone. Good listener and friend.
Geraldine too posh for her own good, likes flying.
Gillian dyes her hair green, likes clubbing.
Gina eternal mother, eats nappies.
Glenda eats children, hates smoking.
Georgina wants to be a man.
Grace blubs a lot, wees in the bath.
Hannah needs to be naked at all times, eats kebabs.
Harriet has a brain somewhere, will prob end up living on pizza.
Hayley lives on dads beers, is lazy bitch.
Heather shags like a freight train, a screamer.
Helen loves sleeping and alcohol and is work shy.
Heidi the hills are alive with the sound of music, likes gherkins.
Hilary frigid bitch. Thinks money grows on trees.
Holly prickly to the touch, seasonal shagmeister.
Ina drinks tequila from the bottle, wets the bed.
Ingrid right wing Nazi tendencies, never smiles.
Jackie heroin addict, sold her child.
Janet soft, warm and really cuddly. Good shag.
Jane enjoys wanking men (or women).
Jasmine smells of sewers, eats the heads off rats.
Jemma does anal, wears too much eye make
Jennifer huge breasts, should shave her legs more often.
Jerrica a bitch thinks she's good
Jessica virgin, always will be.
Joanne moans in her sleep, cant cook, moans when she wakes up!
Jodie absolutely perfect in every way, every group of friends should have one!
Joy would make a good exotic dancer. men love her.
Judith big eyes, big tits.
Judy huge tits, married to an arse.
Julia innocent face, don't trust her, she'll steal your wallet in five minutes.
Justine massive tits, likes hanging around men's toilets.
Julie jabba the Hutt's sister, constantly pregnant.
Karen too smart for her own good and is insensitive to others.
Katie big feet, shags men over 50.
Kate talks complete bollocks all the time, scavenger.
Katherine is a follower. doomed to be successful but not compleatly fight for a
tea cosy.
Kelly smells of cheese, slobbers when kissing.
Kerry perfect in every way and a complete sex goddess.
Kimberley wants to be a bloke, drinks like a bloke, farts like a bloke and wears a wig.
Kirsty eats live moles, can't dance.
Kylie can't sing but who cares.
Lana hated by her parents, accidental pregnancy.
Lara action packed, never seen naked.
Laura likes Max power magazine, can't drive.
Lauren pert breasts, seldom ventures out at night.
Leah likes outdoor sex, wees standing up.
Lena eats food then throws up, rapidly shrinking.
Leslie likes bondage, hates men.
Linda perfect in every way
Lindsay likes doggy style, doesn't do housework.
Lisa will take all your money and run, gets turned on by porn.
Livvy pink, prim and perfect. people find this annoying.
Liz good looking, definately one to shag.
Lorraine constantly whinges, will strip for a packet of jellybabies.
Louisa sensible head on her shoulders. collects socks.
Louise real babe, bright too, I'd drink her bath water.
Lucy strange dancer, wants to marry her dad. theif.
Madeline drives like a bloke, likes tractors.
Maggie trainspotter, likes plaid.
Margaret lovely mother, very generous.
Maria bangs like a barn door.
Marie life's slapper. Likes men to do DIY.
Marina no get up and go, rusty underwear.
Marilyn eats like a horse, out stays her welcome.
Martina ugly lesbian.
Martine can't act, can't sing, nice tits.
Matilda likes dancing, mainly the waltz.
Mary gets hurt easily.
Meg cheesy smell, should be spelt with an S.
Megan loves nature, cares more for trees than people. radical and gets things done.
Melanie can hold two bar vacuum orally indefinitely.
Melissa eats dogs, been in prison 6 times for burglary.
Meryl dances like an ape, doesn't realise.
Michaela likes animals, should make a video with them.
Michelle wears white stilettos, dances round her handbag.
Marsha big butt, small brain.
Monica doesn't swallow, should have.
Naomi wannabe diva, more of a diver.
Nancy white hair, remembers manners.
Natalie eats with her mouth open, farts the Nokia phone tune.
Natasha could use a face lift but is a sweet loyal friend
Nell hasn't realised WWII has ended, lives in Kent.
Nicola slapper, alcoholic in denial.
Nicole girls hate her, men use her and dump her.
Nikki loved up, eats cucumbers.
Nina stuffs her bra with tissues, been single for years.
Nisha hs a deep interest in the YMCA. falls in love easily.
Olga you can park a bike in her arsecrack, excessive facial hair.
Olivia neutron bomb.
Pamela gives amazing head, made of plastic.
Pat forest forager, likes wild boar.
Paula transvestite merchant banker from Basildon.
Penelope pit stop queen, likes men to be stiff.
Penny burps like a man, lives in dungerees and gets told to shut up alot.
Phillippa butt ugly lesbian.
Priscilla likes painting with oils, Duckhams mainly.
Rachel amazing gravity defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her arsecheeks.
Rebecca hairy armpits, orgasms without contact.
Rhia alcoholic, goes after mingers.
Rosie can be prickly, good head
Rula she measures up well.
Sacha believes carrots make you see in the dark, likes crotcheless knickers &
malteasers.
Sadie stand up if you're slim, please stand up.
Sally drives a Mustang, fights in pubs.
Samantha loves her brother, has four deformed children.
Sandra shags donkeys for fun, bow legged.
Sarah hangs around with the wrong crowd, Kinky in bed, loves porn.
Selina doesn't wear pants, heavy laundry bills.
Sharon shags like a locomotive, yo
Shirley can swallow a Curly Whirly whole, likes bananas.
Sian does mean sheep impression, hates mint sauce.
Simone used to be a shot putter from Cardiff.
Sonya dirty lady of the night. Often referred to as a carrier.
Sophie brothel madam, wears a wrinkly corset.
Stacey likes crotchless jeans and arseless Speedo's.
Steffi closet lesbian, maintains heterosexual relationship for effect.
Steph is a pretty, loved by her family and prince charming, has it all i.e spoilt daddy's
princess.
Stephanie eats Muppets, wears Brogues.
Sue totally gorgeous!
Tanya hot minx, too short.
Tara upper class slapper, needs extra chemicals.
Tiffany annoying and clingy. but makes up for it by being damn fit.
Tash lives about 10 seconds behind everyone in the world but makes up for it with her
tits
Tina face like a smacked arse, should eat less.
Tori lives in a hedge, can't water ski.
Tracy easily swayed by alcohol. Mostly seen without underwear. Loves kittens.
Tracey lesbian.
Ursula likes puppies, in curry.
Vic Likes to go commando. dreams of futures with lots of leather and men in thongs.
Victoria too smart for her own good and is insensitive to others.
Vicky likes Yoga and in everyway. known to be very loud.
Vikki wears too much lipstick to taste food. runs after dumbarsed guys who don’t like
her.
Wendy possibly a man.
Zara face like an elephant's backside. cant see her toes from breast enhancements.
Zoe talentless rock chick.
Neil - sweet and will do anything in this world for you, great in bed.

well obviously pretty spot on, but never really been so comfy with the sweet tag? usually comes along shortly after asking someone out and being let down gently eh. can't complain too much though! biggrin
n x x x :P
Quote by neilinleeds
Neil - sweet and will do anything in this world for you, great in bed.

well obviously pretty spot on, but never really been so comfy with the sweet tag? usually comes along shortly after asking someone out and being let down gently eh. can't complain too much though! biggrin
n x x x :P
Ditto.
I was even told recently to lose the "nice guy" image dunno
Quote by The Shadow
Jonathon - loud, sex mad and great with it

does that describe me????? i'll let you decide!!!
JGL
Roger - Mythical creature which obviously does not exist. wink
thats it confirmed then.....
Dave - extremely sexy, always funny, intelligent, stylish, trendsetter i.e. a wanker.
Remember the last time we had this?
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/9781.html
Mike.
Quote by MikeNorth
Remember the last time we had this?
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/9781.html
Mike.

ooo Mike here i was thinking how much time Has gone into making this post rolleyes
And there you go and burst me bubble for poor old Debbwebs smackbottom
Deborah is really biting the pillow with two hands wink
Quote by Debbiewebs

Deborah is really biting the pillow with two hands wink

Does that mean you've got your arse up in the air Debbs?
Or is my mind in the gutter again?
Quote by dambuster
Does that mean you've got your arse up in the air Debbs?

Yes ...........great position to apply the anosol serposertrise....you wanna help?
rotflmao :rotflmao:

Steve - popular and funny & hung like a donkey.
quote]
lol Well.. i suppose Things could be worse!.. wink :wink: :wink:
Quote by Debbiewebs

Does that mean you've got your arse up in the air Debbs?

Yes ...........great position to apply the anosol serposertrise....you wanna help?
rotflmao :rotflmao:
Yes please. But don't be too shocked if the suppository dribbles a little.
Quote by SarfLondoner
Claire perfect in every way and a complete sex goddess.
.

You see ive been telling you guys all along :giggle:
(Though i bet it means the exact opposite without the i confused )
Haydn - tries hard
well it has been said that Im very trying
so it must be true redface
Quote by SarfLondoner
Vic Likes to go commando. dreams of futures with lots of leather and men in thongs

:shock:
cool
Quote by The Shadow
Mark - wished girls liked him for who he is not his great looks, mouthy bastard

dunno
innocent
Helen loves sleeping and alcohol and is work shy.

I'll just pop back off to bed then shall I? :shock: drinkies whilst my other half 'constantly watches porn' (Ithat'll be beacuse I'm always asleep so obviously never pleasure him in anyway lol )
Quote by The Shadow
Steve - popular and funny & hung like a donkey.
.

well 2 out of 3 is not bad :shock: wink biggrin
Quote by teppic
Steve - popular and funny & hung like a donkey.
.

thats me, perfect description
Fred – sucks pigs dicks and swallows alot. :shock: :giggle:
Thank god the name Wilma went out with the stoneage.
Love
Wilma
x x x x