Cow tipping is an art in itself. It began many years ago, when a young boy of the name of Tipper decided to make a cow more comfortable as it slept. Thinking that standing while sleeping was cruel and unusual, he set out one night to give 'ol Betsy a rest. Tragically, Tipper fell into a thick cow pie as he tried making his way back to his warm bed. He ended up going to the hospital with a severe paranoia of cows. The next day, his family had a big steak dinner.
For generations after, Texans have engaged in this heightening activity. Young children dream of it during their algebra classes, the rites to passage so close and in their reach. As the 16th birthday approaches, all your peers will gather and perform this ritual with breathless anticipation.
What NOT to do while tipping a cow.
Do not wear red. Bulls are in the area.
Do not tug on the tail to check on sleeping status.
Do not make "moo" sounds. This only aggravates them.
Do not try to ride the cow like a horse.
Do not try to milk the cow.
Do not make friends with the cow. Remember, you are there to TIP the cow, not buy it a drink.
Do not dress cow up in a pink tutu. They like purple.
Do not eat a burger in front of the cow. They have feelings too!
Other suggestions
If the fence is making a buzzing sound, do not attempt to cut. If you do, you will have frizzy hair for the next few days.
If the fence is making a buzzing sound and may be electrified, do NOT attempt to relieve yourself on it. I have seen this happen. It's NOT pretty.
Make sure you bring the good truck. This is supposed to be done quietly. Do not have a truck that backfires like a rifle. Cows will awaken.
Make sure it IS a cow. If it has horns, and no udders, Back off with caution.
Remember poor Tipper. Beware of cow pies.
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Who's for Cow tipping
Quote by goose35
Does this help?
Ahhh yes
Just one thing......................................
Why ?
Because your bored with rolling sheep over onto there backs so they can't get up again
Suppose it gets like that in the sticks
It's not really a country bumpkin thing It's more a trick for townies us country types are more tended to get the sheep a pair of velcro gloves some wellies and..........................
ooh is that the time I gotta dash
Sex God
Quote by MrFCTrue
Cow tipping is an art in itself.
Quote by MrFCIt's not only Texans that do this
It began many years ago... For generations after, Texans have engaged in this heightening activity.
What NOT to do while tipping a cow.
Do not wear red. Bulls are in the area. Actually, bulls are colour blind - but better safe than sorry
Do not tug on the tail to check on sleeping status. Definitely not! :shock:
Do not make "moo" sounds. This only aggravates them. True
Do not try to ride the cow like a horse. Again, definitely not!
Do not try to milk the cow. Unless you're thirsty and don't mind (warm) unpasteurised milk - which takes a bit of getting used to.
Do not make friends with the cow. Remember, you are there to TIP the cow, not buy it a drink. As if!
Do not dress cow up in a pink tutu. They like purple.
Do not eat a burger in front of the cow. They have feelings too!
Other suggestions
If the fence is making a buzzing sound, do not attempt to cut. If you do, you will have frizzy hair for the next few days. You can climb the fence. It just tingles a bit. However, try not to let your groin area come into direct contact with the fence - especially if you're wearing jeans that have metal zips or studs etc. I did that once :shock: :shock:
If the fence is making a buzzing sound and may be electrified, do NOT attempt to relieve yourself on it. I have seen this happen. It's NOT pretty. :shock: :shock: :eeek:
Make sure you bring the good truck. This is supposed to be done quietly. Do not have a truck that backfires like a rifle. Cows will awaken.
Make sure it IS a cow. If it has horns, and no udders, Back off with caution. Or make sure that you get it over first time - and then run like hell!
It is definitely best to start with cows. Bull tipping is NOT for beginners! :jagsatwork:Your'e not seriously telling me that this is the first most of you have heard of this harmless rural activity? I can't be the only one who used to do this on the way back from the pub. In all seriousness, it shouldn't really be done in case the poor cows break ribs when they fall. Mind you, they don't half go over with a hell of a thud :giggle:
Will
PS Am I giving away too much of my mis-spent youth?
