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Why are so many people BI?

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Hope this comes across alright as I am straight and would like to ask how others found out they have bi tendencies.
I can talk how I feel about woman as I am one.
I myself have wondered if I could have another woman, and for me the want has never been there, I am not discussed about the fact that women do, I can see the attraction, as I have found some woman to be very sexy, but then to have sex with them just isn’t my thing.
I have felt in some cases that it is either something that they do to please men, and in other cases perhaps could be that they haven’t come across men that can totally satisfy them. But I believe in a lot of cases it is personal choice.
I can’t say much about BI men as I haven’t had experience in that area.
I am just intrigued and would like to understand others views.
What are you thoughts on this subject?
I started to have look at other women in my 20s but I think it was more finding the female body sexy than anything else. I started to feel attracted to women in my 30s and even discussed it with my ex hubby. He was ok for me to experiment but I said it would be a private thing between me and the woman involved rather than to put on a 2 girl show for his benefit. Don't think he liked that much rolleyes
I didn't do anything about my tendencies until we had split and did so for my own reasons. Never looked back since biggrin I'm a proud tit perv but as much as I joke with straight women, I respect their choice not to indulge
Quote by Sassy-Seren
I started to have look at other women in my 20s but I think it was more finding the female body sexy than anything else. I started to feel attracted to women in my 30s and even discussed it with my ex hubby. He was ok for me to experiment but I said it would be a private thing between me and the woman involved rather than to put on a 2 girl show for his benefit. Don't think he liked that much rolleyes
I didn't do anything about my tendencies until we had split and did so for my own reasons. Never looked back since biggrin I'm a proud tit perv but as much as I joke with straight women, I respect their choice not to indulge

Thanks sassy!
I can flirt with woman I don't have a problem there, and some I find very sexy too!
I do believe you have one life why not try what you want, I say good luck to anyone for trying things that they want to try.
Quote by Hibernian
I started to have look at other women in my 20s but I think it was more finding the female body sexy than anything else. I started to feel attracted to women in my 30s and even discussed it with my ex hubby. He was ok for me to experiment but I said it would be a private thing between me and the woman involved rather than to put on a 2 girl show for his benefit. Don't think he liked that much rolleyes
I didn't do anything about my tendencies until we had split and did so for my own reasons. Never looked back since biggrin I'm a proud tit perv but as much as I joke with straight women, I respect their choice not to indulge

Don't take this personally, but that really annoys me, it's selfish and it's cheating.
I used to use a lesbian chat room some years ago, and there was a bisexual woman used it, and we got on very well, on and off the board, however, her atttude towards that side of her sexuality really annoyed me.
She used to see women, and her husband wasn't very happy about it, she said that was "his problem to deal with".
When asked how she would feel if he cheated on her, she said she would "cut it off" (his member), she wasn't cheating, just satisfying her bi side :roll: .
What's selfish about it? I wanted to try it for the first time in private without feeling like I was putting on a show just for him. I never said if I liked it that he wouldn't be involved at any future meets, just the first one.
Quote by Hibernian
I started to have look at other women in my 20s but I think it was more finding the female body sexy than anything else. I started to feel attracted to women in my 30s and even discussed it with my ex hubby. He was ok for me to experiment but I said it would be a private thing between me and the woman involved rather than to put on a 2 girl show for his benefit. Don't think he liked that much rolleyes
I didn't do anything about my tendencies until we had split and did so for my own reasons. Never looked back since biggrin I'm a proud tit perv but as much as I joke with straight women, I respect their choice not to indulge

Don't take this personally, but that really annoys me, it's selfish and it's cheating.
I didnt see it that way If you are in a relationship where this has been dicussed and both are ok about it, how can it be cheating?
The fact she has asked his thoughts on it isnt cheating in my opinion.
She didn't then say she went and done it without him knowing, I think sassy said she waited and now they are no longer together has since tryed.

I used to use a lesbian chat room some years ago, and there was a bisexual woman used it, and we got on very well, on and off the board, however, her atttude towards that side of her sexuality really annoyed me.
Can I ask why would you being a male, be using a lesbian chat room?
And what does on and off the board mean?

She used to see women, and her husband wasn't very happy about it, she said that was "his problem to deal with".
All parties I believe need to be happy.
When asked how she would feel if he cheated on her, she said she would "cut it off" (his member), she wasn't cheating, just satisfying her bi side :roll: .
But to quote this in the same sentance as questioning Sassy, I can not see the resembalance!
Is it me being dim again?
Quote by Hibernian
Would you be so happy if your man wanted to try other women, but wanted to do it on his own first?

But that wouldn't be experimenting with a bi side would it? That's just shagging another woman. Now if he said he wanted to try another GUY then yes I would be happy for him to do it without me there
Quote by Sassy-Seren
Would you be so happy if your man wanted to try other women, but wanted to do it on his own first?

But that wouldn't be experimenting with a bi side would it? That's just shagging another woman. Now if he said he wanted to try another GUY then yes I would be happy for him to do it without me there
So what you are saying is if someone was really embarrassed, say going bi, then a lover would give them the space to try. Without further complicating the experience.
If that is what you are saying, I agree, we should all give some space sometimes. To be there just to see the shag is a selfish act. Never giving space to the one you love.
Travis
Quote by
Would you be so happy if your man wanted to try other women, but wanted to do it on his own first?

But that wouldn't be experimenting with a bi side would it? That's just shagging another woman. Now if he said he wanted to try another GUY then yes I would be happy for him to do it without me there
So what you are saying is if someone was really embarrassed, say going bi, then a lover would give them the space to try. Without further complicating the experience.
If that is what you are saying, I agree, we should all give some space sometimes. To be there just to see the shag is a selfish act. Never giving space to the one you love.
Travis
Oh I think I could be out in the cold with this one :sad:
I am seriously prone to jealousy and so is m partner J. Our swinging is done together or not at all. J is bi at her own choice but as with the straight side of our swinging having me there is integral to the whole point of why we do this.
There is no space in our lives for seperate swing thats for sure. When we set out on this journey we both agreed that if one felt too awkward about anything we were doing then we would both stop. OK I know this might be easier said than done.
Infact I can't see any relationship returning to a pre-swing state of play without changing the individuals concerned. However the idea that either has the right to pull both partners away from it all at least gives a sense of togetherness I think.
I am selfish i guess I do need to be there. Fortunately J feels the same.
As for the bi side of J talking on her behalf and what she has said to me I would say that she mirrors how sassy wrote about her interest in other women.
Sticking very strictly to the question.....
I think it's in most peoples nature to want to try things they've never experienced. Here, I think people are more likely to admit it.
I'm attracted to people irrespective of gender.
:thumbup:
For me, it was personal choice….
I found out from an early age that the chemistry could and did work both ways!!!!!!!…..
Nothing to do with pleasing anyone but myself……and the other party involved of course…..
I can assure you too that I have come across men who have totally satisfied me…..And women too…..
If there is chemistry there…. why deny it? Male or Female……. Unless you are forced to of course……
As long as both parties are happy with the situation……it’s all fun……..
kiss :kiss:
Quote by winchwench
Sticking very strictly to the question.....
I think it's in most peoples nature to want to try things they've never experienced. Here, I think people are more likely to admit it.
I'm attracted to people irrespective of gender.
:thumbup:

Spot on for me... i dont like labels either... i like people and if theres chemistry... :twisted:
Suze xx
Quote by Hibernian
You are missing the point that her partner "wasn't" happy about it.

He was ok for me to experiment but I said it would be a private thing between me and the woman involved rather than to put on a 2 girl show for his benefit. Don't think he liked that much

That is what my comment was based upon, if he was happy about it, then I wouldn't have commented and my example wouldn't have applied.
He wasn't happy about it because he wanted it to be more of a show than me being allowed to experiment. I was trying to make the connection with the original statement about women doing it to please their man rather than for their own reasons
Quote by Hibernian
You are missing the point that her partner "wasn't" happy about it.

He was ok for me to experiment but I said it would be a private thing between me and the woman involved rather than to put on a 2 girl show for his benefit. Don't think he liked that much

That is what my comment was based upon, if he was happy about it, then I wouldn't have commented and my example wouldn't have applied.
Look at it another way...you fancy a bit of cock on cock action,you tell this to your partner and she says "hell yeah,give me a front row seat"...but that wasn't what you had in mind,well not the first time anyway!
Why are so many people BI?
it is greed, pure and simple greed.
Nothing to do with loving the differences between the texture of a man and a woman.. (and any other gender)
Nothing to do with the pleasures of the different smells and tastes.
Absolutely nothing to do with the way that each gender and the way in which they interact with you in bed and out of it.
Completely nothing to do with how diverse each gender is and the combination of them both in your life is mind-blowing.
It is. Just simply. Greed.
Quote by Hibernian
In your opinion it is Splendid, I on the other hand, have a very different opinion.

oh ffs man. I was being sarcastic and just a little ironic. rolleyes
Another straight female here redface
I can certainly look at other female and say WOW but have no interest in having sex with them.
What confuses me about bisexuality is more the fact women are so open and honest about it and hey if your attracted to the same sex then I say go for it.
However here’s the confusing bit
Lots of men in the swinging scene who claim to be bisexual also claim they are not attracted to men?? But then have preferences when it comes to women and how they look, be it size, shape etc, this becomes very confusing indeed.
confused dunno
Im bisexual and i have been since i was a teenager, in fact i had a woman before i had a man, iv always been attracted to both men and women and even as a teenager it never confused me it was just how i was, i love to be one on one with a woman or a man, but i think the combination of both at the same time can be mind blowing. (if not a little greedy lol )
although as a bi single fem i do worry when i get replies from my ad from cpls where the lady is bi curious...always have nightmares of meeting a cpl and the woman doing it more for there partner sake and it not working out, can be very embarrassing for all parties sad
Quote by splendid_
Why are so many people BI?
it is greed, pure and simple greed.
Nothing to do with loving the differences between the texture of a man and a woman.. (and any other gender)
Nothing to do with the pleasures of the different smells and tastes.
Absolutely nothing to do with the way that each gender and the way in which they interact with you in bed and out of it.
Completely nothing to do with how diverse each gender is and the combination of them both in your life is mind-blowing.
It is. Just simply. Greed.

:inlove:
wink
I think that at one time in an individuals lifetime they have at least Sexual Thoughts about a person of the same gender.
As a species we are attracted to:
Physical & Intellectual beauty.
Wealth.
Experience in Age.
Smell.
Skin Colour.
Hair Colour......
So both genders have these things going on
.
Since joining Swinging Heaven, I have had fun with Men but ONLY as part of a Couple. Of which it's declared that's he's that way inclined.
I like to enjoy both.... rolleyes
Yet this doesn't mean that if I come across a Couple where the Fella is Straight am after him.... redface
My Bi - Side is just for fun & only comes out when the time is right & with the right people.
For a better idea have a read of my adverts below:
One is for Couples & another for Single Females.
Sexuality is a complex thing... :twisted: biggrin
From,
Wunderhorse.
Quote by Hibernian
My Bi - Side is just for fun & only comes out when the time is right & with the right people.
Sexuality is a complex thing... :twisted: biggrin
From,
Wunderhorse.

:thumbup:
Do you have something to contribute to this thread or are you just going to comment on others posts?
You responded to a few posters comments but as yet you haven’t answered the original thread.
Plus I have asked some questions on a post you submitted but as yet you have yet to comment on these.
Would you like to do so at some point please. :thumbup:
Quote by Deviants
Another straight female here redface
I can certainly look at other female and say WOW but have no interest in having sex with them.
What confuses me about bisexuality is more the fact women are so open and honest about it and hey if your attracted to the same sex then I say go for it.
However here’s the confusing bit
Lots of men in the swinging scene who claim to be bisexual also claim they are not attracted to men?? But then have preferences when it comes to women and how they look, be it size, shape etc, this becomes very confusing indeed.
confused dunno

I'd like to comment on that and tryand explain it, or at least offer my thoughts on it (ie the confusing aspect).
I fall into the category of a man who claims to be bisexual, probably actually is by definition at least, or rather, if the definition is that you have to actually have or have had sex with a member of your own sex, then yes, that would make me bisexual.
If the definition is that you have to be sexually attracted to a member of your own sex, then no, i'm not, lol.
The thing is you see, personally speaking, I am only attracted to womens bodies, the touch and feel of a woman and the thought of being intimate with a woman.
I do not feel that way about a man, quite the reverse.
But, when it comes to sex, in the right circumstances, I can and would do certain things, sexually, with a man.
Now that would be for MY enjoyment only, not his. If he got something out of it then fine. With a woman, it would be for HER enjoyment (HOpefully, lol) and mine also.
I would say that it's a bit like using a vibrator. Fortunately there isn't a label in the same way as 'bisexual' for people who gain sexual satisfaction from using one.
If you use a vibrator, does that mean you are 'attracted' to vibrators??
Do you see where i'm coming from??
Just because you've fu@#ed yourself with a cucumber it doesn't make you a vegetarian!!!
There are though i'm sure men who are and can be physically and mentally attracted to other men aswell as and equal too, members of the opposite sex, same for women too, but I think most 'bisexual' men, as described on here, are actually not 'bisexual' at all, in the true sense, but just like the thrill and excitement of being with another guy, rather than the attraction side of things.
I believe that there is a scale of sexuality that has 'totally straight' at one end and 'taotally homosexual' at the other, and we are all at various places on that scale with not many in the dead centre and not many at either end, but most somewhere in between, though when you add in 'attraction' it all gets a bit too confusing and most (male at least) would move quite a few places towards the 'totally straight' side, lol.
That's my take on it anyway, from my own personal view, and I think it has little to do with greed or being selfish, that's all wrapped up in a different debate about cheating, but what do I know eh? I'm just a bloke, lol!!!!
DP
Quote by Drnwalls
Another straight female here redface
I can certainly look at other female and say WOW but have no interest in having sex with them.
What confuses me about bisexuality is more the fact women are so open and honest about it and hey if your attracted to the same sex then I say go for it.
However here’s the confusing bit
Lots of men in the swinging scene who claim to be bisexual also claim they are not attracted to men?? But then have preferences when it comes to women and how they look, be it size, shape etc, this becomes very confusing indeed.
confused dunno

I'd like to comment on that and tryand explain it, or at least offer my thoughts on it (ie the confusing aspect).
I fall into the category of a man who claims to be bisexual, probably actually is by definition at least, or rather, if the definition is that you have to actually have or have had sex with a member of your own sex, then yes, that would make me bisexual.
If the definition is that you have to be sexually attracted to a member of your own sex, then no, i'm not, lol.
The thing is you see, personally speaking, I am only attracted to womens bodies, the touch and feel of a woman and the thought of being intimate with a woman.
I do not feel that way about a man, quite the reverse.
But, when it comes to sex, in the right circumstances, I can and would do certain things, sexually, with a man.
Now that would be for MY enjoyment only, not his. If he got something out of it then fine. With a woman, it would be for HER enjoyment (HOpefully, lol) and mine also.
I would say that it's a bit like using a vibrator. Fortunately there isn't a label in the same way as 'bisexual' for people who gain sexual satisfaction from using one.
If you use a vibrator, does that mean you are 'attracted' to vibrators??
Do you see where i'm coming from??
Just because you've fu@#ed yourself with a cucumber it doesn't make you a vegetarian!!!
There are though i'm sure men who are and can be physically and mentally attracted to other men aswell as and equal too, members of the opposite sex, same for women too, but I think most 'bisexual' men, as described on here, are actually not 'bisexual' at all, in the true sense, but just like the thrill and excitement of being with another guy, rather than the attraction side of things.
I believe that there is a scale of sexuality that has 'totally straight' at one end and 'taotally homosexual' at the other, and we are all at various places on that scale with not many in the dead centre and not many at either end, but most somewhere in between, though when you add in 'attraction' it all gets a bit too confusing and most (male at least) would move quite a few places towards the 'totally straight' side, lol.
That's my take on it anyway, from my own personal view, and I think it has little to do with greed or being selfish, that's all wrapped up in a different debate about cheating, but what do I know eh? I'm just a bloke, lol!!!!
DP
Thanks for your comments it was to me a insight, When I have spoken to a few guys feeling the way you do they have explained in much the same way you have.
That's good. So i'm not so weird then after all, lol.
Im not sure this is a question that can be answered.
IMO, everyone is at the very least a little bit curious and those who say they arent are telling porkies lol
Quote by helnheaven
Im not sure this is a question that can be answered.
IMO, everyone is at the very least a little bit curious and those who say they arent are telling porkies lol

I have the curiosity to find out about it, but not the curiosity to act upon it!
Does this mean I am telling porkies then? :lol:
Quote by Drnwalls
That's good. So i'm not so weird then after all, lol.

I think your previous post was really good, Brilliant in fact. I can wholly see the point you right and know a few guys I could probably show this too who would - yup thats me alright!
Sound post thanks :thumbup:
Thanks for explaining your side of things.
However I’m still confused if being honest.
The point I was trying to make is why some bisexual men (notice I said some) freely admit to not being attracted to men (which is fine) but then these same men go on to say they wont meet women they are not attracted to? That’s what’s confusing.
Either attraction is important or its not, why should their gender make a difference.
Does that make sense? It does to me lol
Quote by Drnwalls
That's good. So i'm not so weird then after all, lol.

No not weird just adventurous I would say. Great post thanks xx
i am wat has been called bi responsive i used to b curious in fact my first proper crush was a woman when i was 15 i never acted on it just fantasised about it i finally tried it a few years back and was still very unsure as in some ways i throughly enjoyed it but in others i found it a little strange as in even though i am a woman and i know wat i like i felt a little lost as to wat to do to a woman how would i b sure that wat i liked was wat she liked so felt awkward
so i then decided i wasn't bi at all but then have found that it crept into our play situations more n more often and i throughly enjoyed it so i do not seek it out but if it seeks me out i go with the flow and enjoy
this does not mean i just recieve oh no i deffo return the fun too
so yes i am greedy but that is just me in all aspects of my life not just sex lol i do enjoy it very much and i do find women very very sexy but would still only see myself as bi responsive wink
Quote by Deviants
Thanks for explaining your side of things.
However I’m still confused if being honest.
The point I was trying to make is why some bisexual men (notice I said some) freely admit to not being attracted to men (which is fine) but then these same men go on to say they wont meet women they are not attracted to? That’s what’s confusing.
Either attraction is important or its not, why should their gender make a difference.
Does that make sense? It does to me lol

Ahhhh, I see. I did miss the point, but still think my post explained the reason why 'some' men think like that.
Again, I think that it comes down to 'usage' for want of a better word.
I wouldn't meet with a woman that I wasn't attracted too, in either a physical or mental way, as making love to / pleasuring a woman would require me to be attracted to her in some way or another, whereas I could 'use' a man to erm, pleasure myself, lol, without having to be attracted to him!!!
I suppose also it comes down to your preferences, as in bisexual preferences.
Personally, I can't empathise with men who want to have sex with another man in the same way as a guy would have sex with a woman ie in a dominant / penetrative way.
So, if a guy like that was to say he wouldn't meet a woman that he wasn't attracted to, but he would meet a man that he wasn't attracted to, I would find that confusing, but I don't think that would be the case in many.
I think your confusion perhaps stems from mis-understanding the two different things, bisexual sub men and bisexual dom men.
From what I have said here and earlier does that make sense?
How a bisexual sub man could say those things and it be perfectly sensible??
There are also I am sure though, men who just have a fetish for shagging other men, without actually being attracted to them, in much the same way that people have a fetish for all manner of things.
DP