Yorkie norfener for sale!

14 Oct 2004

Now we are supposed to be a helpfull bunch so it's unfair on Fem to talk down her possible sale to some gullible member who happens to come by so it's only right that we try and help the girl.......
Fem try fluuffing up your advert with some positives lines like ...eermmm....ohhhh I dont know .....eeerrrmmm....
handy around the house, will keep the fly's off the meat.
errrr
Guy Fawkes night around the corner, old pram thrown in.
stuff like that.

14 Oct 2004

hmmm now ya buss fare to manchester i MIGHT be persuaded to part with! wink

i have a dead godlfish burried in a ciggarette box in my fron t garden

14 Oct 2004

Quote by neilinleeds
now i reckon i'm worth about 5 goldfish. or at least the bus fare to manchester. call it a tenner! now any more offers?
n x x x x

Neil stop fannywanking about................. 5 goldfish indeed lol

:lol: :lol:
1 fin and 2 bubbles not a fishbit more :P
Although if you're really that good a decorating you can have 10 goldfish and an extra ironing one. kiss

Jas
XXX

14 Oct 2004

:shock: You mean buggers ...
Our neil has been a real rock over the last few days ... really supportive for me and you bastards take the piss out of him ..... evil

Right now down to business ....
I have 3 goldfish and a celestial that I'm willing to enter bidding with .............. :twisted: but only if he leaves his yorkshire tea at home :shock:
:giggle:

14 Oct 2004

Listen, I've just cottoned on: have you noticed how a certain southern businessman-let's call him Dave J for the sake of his anonymity-seems to be encouraging a bit of a bidding war? I smell a con!! Listen: stop bidding, let's agree a price , not bid against each other, and work out a rota to share Neil out between ourselves. Don't know why I didn't see it sooner.
So, keep the Goldfish to yourselves: I agree with Jas-let's stick at one bubble and a fin. Any advance?....nope, right, auctioneer, your move methinks

14 Oct 2004

Well if thats the case, I want him before Agricola cos I dont want him arriving at mine covered in all sorts of yukky animal crap ...never get it out of the carpets.

14 Oct 2004

Quote by agricola
The telephone number of 'Sweaty Betty' at the Bull and Dog...

14 Oct 2004

agricola!
are you determined on a fall out or not?
me and Mr DaveJ Sir come up with a cunning ruse, and go to all that trouble of recruiting fem_manc to our nefarious cause, and you just bubble us dontcha. well he won't like that i can tell yer! grass!
neilinleeds - in witness protection

14 Oct 2004

Quote by Kinky Lizard

The telephone number of 'Sweaty Betty' at the Bull and Dog...

Jigger me with a muck-fork Kinky. wow!! Where did you get that...see what I mean, old Betty scrubs up really well!! Does it say , wherever you got that, about her trick with the baby pig?? Famous for that she is.
As for the candle-that's actually one of those smelly jobbies, you know, to scent the air. I think it's the trick with the piglet that causes the aroma that seems to follow our Betty around (keeps the flies away from the rest of the village mind...)

14 Oct 2004

Quote by neilinleeds
agricola!
are you determined on a fall out or not?
me and Mr DaveJ Sir come up with a cunning ruse, and go to all that trouble of recruiting fem_manc to our nefarious cause, and you just bubble us dontcha. well he won't like that i can tell yer! grass!
neilinleeds - in witness protection

too right Neil wait till he wakes up one morning and finds that me and the lads have been round in the night and shaved his Ferrets..........

14 Oct 2004

Right,
Neilinleeds deserves some serious offers.
He has good manners and always aims to please ;)
Neil has fantastic come to bed eyes, they would woo anybody in the general bedroom direction. If it's the ladies you are trying to pull, simply let him do the work for you....... lure them in and then the spell wears off once covered over. Hey presto! That babe is yours!
Gardening is one of his many passtimes and he is semi fluent in French. biggrin

He is in touch with his feminine side, although his wardrobe does need a little updating to accomodate for this.
Romantic is his middle name (strange middle name I know, but much better than his real one lol

)
The selling price has been revised to
15 goldfish and a case of stella to keep him happy in his first week in his new home.

14 Oct 2004

Quote by agricola

The telephone number of 'Sweaty Betty' at the Bull and Dog...

14 Oct 2004

:shock:
omg,
that has to be one of the closest offers to the new steep price of neilinleeds. :shock: (ok it's the only offer since the price went up.... what's a few fish between friends ey?)
One sweaty betty weilding a greased up candle and two pigs. :shock:
Mal have you been hijacking with party games again! smackbottom

If the worst comes to the worst one would be able to hide under betty for warmth, eat the pigs and signal for help using the candle.............. dunno

Off to consider who has bid with the highest offer so far and whether the price should be revised again. confused

14 Oct 2004

I'll pay for him to have a huge red rose tatooed on his chest with the words "Oh Lanky Lanky, Lanky,Lanky,Lanky,Lanky, Lancashire ! Underneath.

14 Oct 2004

look!
i'm staying right out of this thread from now on, cos you're all barking! sweaty betty's? greased up pigs? lanky lanky lanky? ((( you've seen me haven't you waddy? lanky is my middle name! well no, despite what fem_manc says, it's actually sydney, so i'm sticking with the romantic ok?! )))
neil x x x ;)

14 Oct 2004

NEILINLEEDS ! ya middle name is Lanky ???
I KNEW ya wanted to defect to the red rose but didnt realise it went back a generation biggrin

15 Oct 2004

I'm sorry Judy, although your offer is good, I think I'm going to have to sell neil for the lower price of 5 goldfish........... the offers seemed to dry up when the price was raised so high. Even Neil thought it rather steep. lol

If no offers are given, looks like I'll have to keep him........... sad

Awwww......... and I so wanted a quick sale. :twisted:
Any last minute offers? Yorkshire tea is included cos I'll be damned if he brings it round to mine! :shock:

15 Oct 2004

How about
2 Turtle Doves
3 French Hens
4 Calling Birds
5 Golden Rings
6 Geese A-laying
7 Swans A-swimming
8 Maids A-milking
9 Ladies Dancing
10 Lords A-leaping
11 Pipers Piping
12 Drummers Drumming
all boxed and wraped delivered in time for xmas?

15 Oct 2004

Neilinleeds for Sale!
http://photos.swingingheaven.co.uk/photo-adverts/photos/140165.jpg
On sale for calling fem_manc
"a simple lancs lass"
Click the link above for evidence gathered.
Price: 5 goldfish o.n.o
(all kinds of goldfish now accepted for a quick sale)
Will gladly do your washing, ironing and decorating!
Perfect model for your underwear and gladly cooks dinner.
Low maintainence. GSOH.
Buy NOW! You won't be disapointed
Ooooo, butters, that is a very serious offer. If no-one else bids now I think you have first dibs on the Stroppy Yorkie.
Although a shark keyring is very tempting! hmmmm or bubbles and a fin....... dunno

15 Oct 2004

Quote by butters999999
How about
2 Turtle Doves
3 French Hens
4 Calling Birds
5 Golden Rings
6 Geese A-laying
7 Swans A-swimming
8 Maids A-milking
9 Ladies Dancing
10 Lords A-leaping
11 Pipers Piping
12 Drummers Drumming
all boxed and wraped delivered in time for xmas?

do you have something against partridges and pear tree that we don't know about ??? biggrin

:D :D
neil... hope you have your passport for the trip to lanky sorted out....
so your rouse as a spy for the Yorkie Liberation Front had been blown...
sean xxxx

15 Oct 2004

Quote by fabio grooverider
neil... hope you have your passport for the trip to lanky sorted out....
so your rouse as a spy for the Yorkie Liberation Front had been blown...

:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
Yorkie Liberation Front........... so that's where my chocolate went :shock:

15 Oct 2004

You know that feeling when you've forgotten something but can't quite put your finger on it? Well thatâ€™s what I got before posting that and you have just made me realise what I forgot!

:rotflmao:

15 Oct 2004

Nope price is still to high Fem....he still looks like an extra from a television adaptation of a Catherine Cookson novel...........it's the shirt I tell ya!

15 Oct 2004

I'd hate to point it out................. but I'm going to anyway........... where is the collar of your shirt Hmmmmmm???? :P biggrin

:D

I think he looks sweet in that photo. Like a puppy saying;
Look at me, I'm so cute, buy me from fem and take me home.... pwetty pwease? I'll be very very good. I won't chew the carpets or widdle in your wardrobe............ honest I won't. I'm a little angel :angel:
Buy me, buy me, buy meeeeeeee

15 Oct 2004

Quote by butters999999

do you have something against partridges and pear tree that we don't know about ??? :D :D

You know that feeling when you've forgotten something but can't quite put your finger on it? Well thatâ€™s what I got before posting that and you have just made me realise what I forgot!

:rotflmao:
don't worry... do it all the time honey
at this point i normally ask what a lovely woman like you is doing in a place like this... but no one needs to see the piss poor effort that is my pulling :D :D :D

Quote by fem_manc-cpl

neil... hope you have your passport for the trip to lanky sorted out....
so your rouse as a spy for the Yorkie Liberation Front had been blown...

:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
Yorkie Liberation Front........... so that's where my chocolate went :shock:
we may be brave but i don't think any man is stupid enough to liberate a woman from her chocolate.....that would be like me telling a woman that one pair of shoes is enough....
sean xxxxxxxx

15 Oct 2004

:shock:
One pair of shoes is enough????? :doh: No-one ever told me that.........
~~~ trapeses out to think which pair of shoes she should keep............ neil get over and get modelling............ :twisted: ~~~
So............ if you didn't liberate the yorkie, who did? mad

15 Oct 2004

at this point i normally ask what a lovely woman like you is doing in a place like this... but no one needs to see the piss poor effort that is my pulling biggrin

:D :D

I thought it was quite a good start! xxxx
So............ if you didn't liberate the yorkie, who did?
well it couldn't of been a girl I mean yorkies are not for girls are they?

15 Oct 2004

Quote by butters999999

at this point i normally ask what a lovely woman like you is doing in a place like this... but no one needs to see the piss poor effort that is my pulling :D :D

I thought it was quite a good start! xxxx
So............ if you didn't liberate the yorkie, who did?
well it couldn't of been a girl I mean yorkies are not for girls are they?
honestly i am not good at pulling....my best two features are apathy and sarcasm... :D :D
i'll have to send you a pm sometime.....
sean xxxxx (tall,dark and 2 out of 3 isn't bad!!)

15 Oct 2004

Sarcasm my favourite type of wit!