You Know You're British When...
Be very proud to be British because...
Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke.
Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.
Mike.
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You Know You're British When
Quote by MikeNorth
And only in America do customers actually address checkout staff by the names they are wearing on their name-badges!
Mike.
Not quite true Mike.
I have twice enjoyed the company of ladies, where my 'opening gambit' was to thank them, using their names as I received my change or was handed back my deit card.
Sex God
Bing from the other side of the pond, I can concur that all statements can be applied to either country.
But, only in America, do they have liquor stores attached to gas stations.
My personal favorite over here is the little signs in the middle of the motorway that tell you its foggy!
Silky xxxxxxxx
But, only in America, do they have liquor stores attached to gas stations.
My personal favorite over here is the little signs in the middle of the motorway that tell you its foggy!
Silky xxxxxxxx
Sex God
Quote by Silk and Big G
My personal favorite over here is the little signs in the middle of the motorway that tell you its foggy!
Silky xxxxxxxx
and the ones that keep telling you.....
"Congestion - Slow down" (nothing on the road)....
"Slow Traffic" (still nothing on the road).....
"30" (still nothing on the road).......
then "END" (and the traffic comes to a standstill)........
: 
Orgasminator
You can be stuck in a traffic queue for hours and then suddenly all move ...for no apparent reason : 
and you drive through cone city or 'men at work signs' and there,s nobody there !!! :shock: :confused:
: and you drive through cone city or 'men at work signs' and there,s nobody there !!! :shock: :confused: Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.
The pedantic part of me is going to pick on this one (sorry!) My local ice rink has special needs sessions where people in wheelchairs/special buggies and sledges can go on the ice, it's fantastic fun!
lecture over
I was playing this MMO game recently, in a team with a bunch of (American) folk I'd teamed up with before. For no clear reason they started to get into this terrible back slapping session "Oh, you're so great man" etc, etc. I thought about it for a moment and then said "Sorry, I'd like to join in here only I'm british". Only one of them got it, and that's only because, whilst living in America now, he lived here in the UK for some of his childhood and is actually Mexican/Britsh/Canadian.
MQ wrote:
You're right of course, MQ, I didn't read closely enough and wish now I'd left that one out. In my time as a social worker I supported wheelchair-users to go on rides in fairgrounds, sail in boats, go dancing, go on the tube in London, just about everything.
Mike.
The pedantic part of me is going to pick on this one (sorry!) My local ice rink has special needs sessions where people in wheelchairs/special buggies and sledges can go on the ice, it's fantastic fun!
You're right of course, MQ, I didn't read closely enough and wish now I'd left that one out. In my time as a social worker I supported wheelchair-users to go on rides in fairgrounds, sail in boats, go dancing, go on the tube in London, just about everything.
Mike.
Sex God
Only in Britain......................nowhere else.
G
G
Quote by HungryP
I have twice enjoyed the company of ladies, where my 'opening gambit' was to thank them, using their names as I received my change or was handed back my deit card.
You smooth bugger, I hate you so much :upset: :upset: :upset: :upset: :upset:
Gimme a break.
Twice - out of 6,754,7645 attempts.
Quote by MikeNorth
Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
cough cough!........eeeeer as being a paramedic! some time ago now!..........errrr ya to agreee :eeek:
i never could get there in time!............... found out that i was holdy the map upside down :doh:
Quote by MikeNorth
Debbiewebs wrote:cough cough!........eeeeer as being a paramedic! some time ago now!..........errrr ya to agreee
i never could get there in time!............... found out that i was holding the map upside down
And driving at the same time I suppose
Mike.
cough cough errrrrrrrr yes
MQ wrote:
By using stations that were at ground level or ones with a lift - I have heard how some have used steps though. Until a few years ago they used to say that wheelchairs were banned from the tube system because of fire regulations, but now everyone has a right to access.
Mike.
how the hell did you manage to get a wheelchair user on the tube???
By using stations that were at ground level or ones with a lift - I have heard how some have used steps though. Until a few years ago they used to say that wheelchairs were banned from the tube system because of fire regulations, but now everyone has a right to access.
Mike.
Quote by Silk and Big G
But, only in America, do they have liquor stores attached to gas stations.
Nope we have them over here now as well... one not far from me will also do dry cleaning and rent you a DVD as well as sell you alcohol and porn..... and its in the middle of no-where so you can't accuse it of also being a quickie-mart for people who walk there!!
Orgasminator
Quote by MQ
Wow Mike how the hell did you manage to get a wheelchair user on the tube???
Mind the Gap :twisted:
