Quote by FredFlintstone
I do remember being imprisoned once - for slapping Wilma.....
Loved every minute of it....:lol:
Hah - knew I had not imagined it.....
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/4491.html
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FredFlintstone
1 week ago
Straight Male, 62
Bisexual Female, 58
UK
Forum
how lovely to see you about.Quote by Jas-Tim
Well I've got no choice really have I
Welcome back ya owld bugger
Jas
XXX
Awwwww - bless you hun - Sorry!
Fancy a rematch - I'll promise not to wear the heels this time
ops: :oops: Or were they Tim's? :shock:
assionkiss: :passionkiss: Now, before any of you old 'uns fall off your perch, yes it is me, the one, the only, the fat, Fred Flintstone. I have been bullied in her by a witch on her broomstick who zoomed by and picked me up on her way in here! :shock: :shock: (I do feel a big slap coming on here!)
Anyway - back to what I was going to say..
Some time ago we went off to a party. A lot of new couples, all horny and raring to go but nervous as hell.
There were about 4 guys who all seemed to know one another who were all talking about chemically enhanced erections. They had obviously aquired, or bought something from somewhere
:roll: :roll: , and had taken it for the party. Most of them were running around chasing all the women but were all clearly tanked up.
Wilma and I decided to play with one couple who we had met several times before but after 20 minutes Wilma realised the guy had joined the others and was "chemical"
We went downstairs and one of the other guys was sat in a chair, sweating like a good 'un, clutching his chest, complaining of a headache and a racing heart having consumed 15 Kronkenbourgs and 2 full strength tablets! :roll: :roll:
The people who owned the house were trying to think on which street corner they could dump a dead body with a hard on at :shock: :shock: and everyone else who had taken them were shaking like a shitting dog!
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Now, whilst it is their choice of where they buy their brick dust and rat poison look alike tablets from, I do think that these guys had it all wrong.
We have had many parties, and been to a few as well. At times I have had my failures sorry Jas, (I got off the bed to get a condom and stepped right on the sharp end of a high heeled shoe on the floor, 5 minutes later, after rolling around the floor in agony, the only thing left sticking up was the high heel! ops: :oops: ), I would rather get an erection for a woman because she pleased me and I wanted to have sex with her rather than do it automatically. Even if it means at times I have the odd flop or three... :oops: :oops:
So ladies, what do you think:
1) Give me a hard cock that goes for hours even if it is attached to something that does not recognise me...
2) Give me some fun with someone who knows I exist even if I have to give him a cuddle and tell him "it doesn't matter" whilst trying not to show my dissappointment every once in a while .......
3)Who gives a shit - I'm pissed as well.... :shock:
Fred
XXXXXXXXX
Anyway - back to what I was going to say..
Some time ago we went off to a party. A lot of new couples, all horny and raring to go but nervous as hell.
There were about 4 guys who all seemed to know one another who were all talking about chemically enhanced erections. They had obviously aquired, or bought something from somewhere
:roll: :roll: , and had taken it for the party. Most of them were running around chasing all the women but were all clearly tanked up.Wilma and I decided to play with one couple who we had met several times before but after 20 minutes Wilma realised the guy had joined the others and was "chemical"
We went downstairs and one of the other guys was sat in a chair, sweating like a good 'un, clutching his chest, complaining of a headache and a racing heart having consumed 15 Kronkenbourgs and 2 full strength tablets! :roll: :roll:
The people who owned the house were trying to think on which street corner they could dump a dead body with a hard on at :shock: :shock: and everyone else who had taken them were shaking like a shitting dog!
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:Now, whilst it is their choice of where they buy their brick dust and rat poison look alike tablets from, I do think that these guys had it all wrong.
We have had many parties, and been to a few as well. At times I have had my failures
sorry Jas, (I got off the bed to get a condom and stepped right on the sharp end of a high heeled shoe on the floor, 5 minutes later, after rolling around the floor in agony, the only thing left sticking up was the high heel! ops: :oops: ), I would rather get an erection for a woman because she pleased me and I wanted to have sex with her rather than do it automatically. Even if it means at times I have the odd flop or three... :oops: :oops: So ladies, what do you think:
1) Give me a hard cock that goes for hours even if it is attached to something that does not recognise me...
2) Give me some fun with someone who knows I exist even if I have to give him a cuddle and tell him "it doesn't matter" whilst trying not to show my dissappointment every once in a while .......
3)Who gives a shit - I'm pissed as well.... :shock:
Fred
XXXXXXXXX
Now pull up a comfy bean bag and tell me all about the old days and how naughty some our oldies were????? :bounce: 
:lickface: Quote by Jags
Fred and Wilma Flintstone!
Welcome newbies - settle down, make yourselves at home and snog me now.:kiss:
Feck! Caught lurking............
:roll: Quote by Jags
.. a couple who have been here longer than anyone else and have the medals, the badges and stickers...
And a bloody nasty itchy rash which I caught at the last party we had
:evil: .... and that was a blooody loooong time ago......Wilma... who was I with that night?
: :shock: I was one of the original Radio series fans and could not understand why people did not think it was the best thing since sliced bread!
I was so disappointed with the TV series and went off it completely after a couple of programmes.
I have just recently got my kids to listen the the original radio series which I have on cd and also as MP3 and they could not believe how much fun it was to use imagination to add in "the missing pieces". Personally I think it did them more good than reading the book or watching the series.
I wonder how long it will be before some big American Studio gets hold of it and refilms it! :doh:
It was such a tragedy that Douglas Adams died when he was still in his prime.
Fred
(I/'m off to mix a PanGalactic GargleBlaster - anyone fancy an inward view?)
I was so disappointed with the TV series and went off it completely after a couple of programmes.
I have just recently got my kids to listen the the original radio series which I have on cd and also as MP3 and they could not believe how much fun it was to use imagination to add in "the missing pieces". Personally I think it did them more good than reading the book or watching the series.
I wonder how long it will be before some big American Studio gets hold of it and refilms it! :doh:
It was such a tragedy that Douglas Adams died when he was still in his prime.
Fred
(I/'m off to mix a PanGalactic GargleBlaster - anyone fancy an inward view?)
Quote by Jas-Tim
If Tim wasn't on nights we'd be there, and the thought of Wilma and the swing don't influence me at all :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
It would just be to offer comfort and succour in her hour of need :angel:
Yeah Right!
Actually - you could probably comfort her by yourself - you know - just in the name of good neighbourlyness!
I'm gonna hide the swing though!
Fred
Warwick Castle does the full medieval banquet. We used to organise trips there for Christmas dinner and all hire the outfits. It is fabulous fun. They do a thing every Friday and Saturday night and From what I can remember it was only about a head. You can book it as a private function as well. Those that wanted to stop over could book into one of the local hotels.
I need to go back anyway - I have a mead jug and cup I wandered off with whilst drunk the last time I was there!oops:
Personally I have never been to a Butlins holiday camp in my life but am sure that letting our hair down and getting into the "swing" of things could make it a really fun weekend. Let's face it - after what they normally see, (whenever I have seen documentaries on the place), they would hardly be shocked by the antics of a load of swingers and are therefore less likely to object or throw you out !
:dunno: :dunno: :dunno: :dunno:
Fred
I need to go back anyway - I have a mead jug and cup I wandered off with whilst drunk the last time I was there!
oops:Personally I have never been to a Butlins holiday camp in my life but am sure that letting our hair down and getting into the "swing" of things could make it a really fun weekend. Let's face it - after what they normally see, (whenever I have seen documentaries on the place), they would hardly be shocked by the antics of a load of swingers and are therefore less likely to object or throw you out !
:dunno: :dunno: :dunno: :dunno: Fred
:x :x Quote by Tigger-Steve
I Wouldnt know as i have never been drunk
(And no...this is not an invite to try and get me drunk @ the munch !!!!)
I hope to god this was written by Tigger otherwise I will be forced to publish a picture of Steve which proves to the contrary this statement...........
.......... and it don't look pretty I can assure you! :twisted: :twisted:
Fred
I know the song - but no way will I sing - I cannot even stand to see talent competitions on telly - they make my skin crawl with embarrasment. :shock: :shock: :shock:
Actually a fly on our wall would die of boredom. We are so not like our persona's on here. Just a dull and frumpy middle aged couple with a house, mortgage, carpet slippers and nothing to say to one another other than "Oh! - Are you still alive?"
The only thing that makes me have new batteries fitted in my pace maker every year is because my life is so exciting on here! If not for this place I would have opted to go to Holland for Euthanasia a long time ago.
Thanks SH - you saved my life!
Fred
Actually a fly on our wall would die of boredom. We are so not like our persona's on here. Just a dull and frumpy middle aged couple with a house, mortgage, carpet slippers and nothing to say to one another other than "Oh! - Are you still alive?"
The only thing that makes me have new batteries fitted in my pace maker every year is because my life is so exciting on here! If not for this place I would have opted to go to Holland for Euthanasia a long time ago.
Thanks SH - you saved my life!
Fred
My god - who keeps resurrecting all the old threads!
I know some of them are good - but there is better stuff around here that my old postings. Go find the sex wars one in the GFZ or summat - that was a lot more fun!
Oh god! - Don't say that please! - Not even remotely funny
*shudders*
Fred
I know some of them are good - but there is better stuff around here that my old postings. Go find the sex wars one in the GFZ or summat - that was a lot more fun!
Quote by corriefem
Know why they are king and queen in here !!!!!!............classic
Oh god! - Don't say that please! - Not even remotely funny
*shudders*
Fred
I have always wanted to beat a car with a leafy branch!
Once, on returning from a weekend holiday my father found his car had been knicked from the car park at Heathrow. After going wappy at the staff for letting a car leave the car park without a ticket he then went back into the terminal waving his parking ticket maoning about security and to ring the police and report the theft of his new car.
Meanwhile my mother went up a level and found the car in the place he had parked it! :doh: :doh: :doh: :doh: :doh: :doh:
More like a case of the Victor Meldrew's for him!
We never let him forget it! :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
Fred
Once, on returning from a weekend holiday my father found his car had been knicked from the car park at Heathrow. After going wappy at the staff for letting a car leave the car park without a ticket he then went back into the terminal waving his parking ticket maoning about security and to ring the police and report the theft of his new car.
Meanwhile my mother went up a level and found the car in the place he had parked it! :doh: :doh: :doh: :doh: :doh: :doh:
More like a case of the Victor Meldrew's for him!
We never let him forget it! :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
Fred
