Ummm... I think it's John Kerry, not John Kelly.
No! Wait! apprently, the debate was between Bush and Matthew Kelly.
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GregLondon
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 50
Forum
It's a difficult subject, and I think that there are lots of well-meaning men who want to make things better, but don't really understand the dynamics of the relationships.
The problem is that many women in abusive relationships don't feel they deserve better, and often feel that the abuse is a form of stability - not in the traditional sense, but in the sense that their self-esteem is so eroded that they cling to the very thing that is destroying them. The idea of a new life without the abuse seems like an impossible dream.
The other problem is that they are often in love with their abusers. And when a person (male or female) is in love, they tend to overlook the negative aspects of their other half.
Most abused women need support, but telling them what to do ("you have to leave him", etc) just reinforces the notion that they are too stupid and weak to make up their own minds. They need to reach their own conclusions and make their own decisions, or else they are just perpetuating the self-myth that they are not in control of their own lives.
The problem is that many women in abusive relationships don't feel they deserve better, and often feel that the abuse is a form of stability - not in the traditional sense, but in the sense that their self-esteem is so eroded that they cling to the very thing that is destroying them. The idea of a new life without the abuse seems like an impossible dream.
The other problem is that they are often in love with their abusers. And when a person (male or female) is in love, they tend to overlook the negative aspects of their other half.
Most abused women need support, but telling them what to do ("you have to leave him", etc) just reinforces the notion that they are too stupid and weak to make up their own minds. They need to reach their own conclusions and make their own decisions, or else they are just perpetuating the self-myth that they are not in control of their own lives.
Well, I have made an effort to post a lot. The most frustrating thing about this place is that you start a thread and it degenerates into...people who already know each other flirting and joking. I don't really mind, but it makes it harder to break through and make an impression. It's the nature of the place, I suspect... there's a lot of sexual energy and people find it hard to stay focused on the topic in hand.
When you look through people's pics and avatars you get a glimpse of all kinds of body parts, but you rarely see the whole picture.
So in that spirit, I thought I'd post a pic that was more revealing, but still suitably cryptic.
Lots of bits of me, but not in the right order... think of it like a jigsaw puzzle.
So in that spirit, I thought I'd post a pic that was more revealing, but still suitably cryptic.
Lots of bits of me, but not in the right order... think of it like a jigsaw puzzle.
Ah well... never mind. Whenever I have started a thread, it doesn't matter how high-brow or interesting I try to make it, within 10 posts it has disintegrated into a mess of emoticons, innuendo and "ooh, you have a nice bum".
It's the nature of this place. You could start a thread about the war in Iraq and within 2 pages it would be about tits and fanny and who is going to the latest munch.
It's the nature of this place. You could start a thread about the war in Iraq and within 2 pages it would be about tits and fanny and who is going to the latest munch.
