NLondonJohn's Forum Posts | Swinging Heaven

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NLondonJohn

Over 90 days ago

Straight Male, 65

0 miles · Greater London

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17 Nov 2007

Every two weeks:
Someone will start a thread with the post "Can I have an invite to your social?"
A post will appear saying "I am locking this thread as this subject was covered exhaustively 3 years ago."
A joke will be posted and immediately locked.
Somebody will congratulate somebody else on their 1000th ... 5000th ... 10,000th post.
A post will appear saying "Sorry, I can't offer any advice as I don't know anything about this .............. but I thought I would make a post anyway"

9 Nov 2007

Quote by SIMMO2506
Hi i have a coach for your pleasre in the ashdon under lymes area of manchester tomorrow night

It's not Sven-Göran Eriksson, is it?? lol

lol

9 Nov 2007

Quote by admin
I know that we've still got more work to do to the My Search feature so new bits will be added shortly

The ability to search using words and phrases would be useful.

5 Nov 2007

I still feel that Roger743's advice to single males is hard to beat. I follow it all the time :grin: ...........
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/10408.html

5 Nov 2007

"Hello-o-o ........" Lesley Phillips
"Ding dong" Lesley Phillips
"Seems like a nice boy" Larry Grayson

23 Oct 2007

Personally, I've always used Roger743's advice as my Bible ................ innocent

innocent

http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/10408.html

23 Oct 2007

Quote by H-x
Some pointers on things not to say in chat;
I'm bored, who wants a meet?
It's been so long I can't remember what to do.
The wife's out for the day who wants to come over? (this is especially bad when their profile says single)
**** whispers: Hi babe, you're hot (this is especially bad when subsequently pasted by every woman in the room)
Who's going to go on cam to entertain me for half an hour?
You get the general idea
H.x

Bloody hell, H-x .............. you've just given away all my best chat-up lines! :grin:

22 Oct 2007

Quote by Serendipity
I've grasped at mrs Dirty's clobber shouting "c'mon juicer, this is fucking it!"

Oh f*ck!!! :laughabove:
Look, I'm laughing so much you made me swear in writing! I don't think I could dog you two, I'd end up needing a wee more than Aunty D from laughing so much!
I'd try hard though :twisted:
Serendipity ......... the thinking man's strumpet!
I've not seen you around these parts for ages. Clearly, you're frequenting a better class of car park. lol

lol

20 Oct 2007

Thanks to boblisa for all their work, and to all the lovely people who I chatted to during the evening.

16 Oct 2007

Quote by twos_company
oops wrong social, i cockedup lol

we did exactly the same on the essex one....
Harry ?were you at bernies one b4 her trek???
I think you would remember if you had met Harry at a social ..................... he was the one in the flat cap and bicycle clips who was probably, God forbid, trying to sing karaoke! lol

lol

12 Oct 2007

Confirming!

12 Oct 2007

Confirming!

28 Sep 2007

Grotmeister,
I'm terribly sorry to cry off so late in the day, but I have just been informed about a work committment for very early the next morning which will make it impossible to attend the Social. I am disappointed as I had delayed putting my name down until I was sure that I could make it.
John

15 Sep 2007

Quote by Newtricks
If you are we would like to meet you...We are looking for over 50's COUPLES ONLY to Rock Around the Clock and Twist an Shout. check out our profile and let us know if you want a Ticket to Ride

.......... and "I can't get no satisfaction" for the SINGLES, I assume! :lol:

13 Sep 2007

Bob Lisa,
I've not put my name down until I was sure I come make it; could you add my name to the list please?
John

29 Aug 2007

Quote by blueandpink
Tenacity is a fantastic character trait, extremely useful and often rewarding BUT sometimes there is a time to stop, smell the flowers and look around you. If you feel you have done everything you can, tried all angles and the consequences of not getting your outcome is changing your character or making life an unhappier place, then it is time to take stock.
Giving up is not always a sign of weakness, it can also be a sign of great strength.

Blimey ............ and there was I thinking that this was just a Gissa-a-Shag site! :mrgreen:

28 Aug 2007

Hot Foxes?

23 Aug 2007

Could you add my name to the list, please?
John

24 Jun 2007

Quote by duncanlondon
Apparently, it was a common reaction for men being hanged to have an erection and come off all in an instant, on the point of death.

Cumming and going, so to speak??

4 May 2007

Quote by hornyinslough
I put a lot of work into my profile....without knowing a lot of people don't read them :doh:

Now you mention it, I've just noticed that there are words next to the pictures ............ wink

wink

14 Apr 2007

Quote by celestria
I think it basically all comes down to enjoying the "filled" sensation when you're being played with. I looooove oral and sometimes wish he'd got a cock on his chin to assist, sometimes fingers are just not enough.

Are you saying that you'd like him to be more of a dickhead??

Quote by Kiss
Why don't men just sit down to pee and save pissing on the toilet and surrounding area?

It's the sudden cold sensation when the end of your cock dips into the water in the bowl .............. (what do you mean, I'm exaggerating?? confused

confused

)

12 Apr 2007

I appreciate that attending an initial social can seem a little daunting, but I have found that people have been really friendly at all the socials/munches I have attended (even to us single men!). You just need to wander up to a group and say, "Hello, I'm ..........." and you're away. After all, you're just inviting them to have a conversation, not have sex with you!!
I think name badges are really useful, particularly for newbies who can find themselves in groups where people already know each other from previous socials.

9 Apr 2007

I loathe texting; it's so fiddly and time-consuming unless I've got the phone connected to the PC and use the keyboard - much quicker to make a call. I find I use only about a dozen of my monthly allowance of 250!
About the only good thing I find about text messages is that they are free to receive when abroad (and don't cost the sender in the UK any more either).

9 Apr 2007

Quote by mazandden
One of my pet hates is the guys that try too hard- the ones that are the first to defend when you;re being directed and the first to shun the whisperers- usualy in the 'pick me, I'm not like all these other bastards!'

I couldn't agree more. That's because I'm not like all these other bastards .................. whoops!

19 Mar 2007

Quote by keeno
I had my first Wagon Wheel for many many years the other day. OMG I had a sugar rush. What the hell do they put in those things?

Same as they always put in them ............. cardboard and shaving foam!

19 Mar 2007

Quote by meat2pleaseu
Who makes these names up?

Bored engineers, well maybe not the official names but when i was an engineer and big hammer was a Birmingham Screwdriver and a diamond tip spatula (for cleaning contacts) was known as a Horace, after some 1930's actor dunno

dunno

Horace Batchelor of K-E-Y-N-S-H-A-M (and 1950s Radio Luxemburg)?

6 Mar 2007

It is possible that this might be the early stages of a failure of your hard disk - so it's a good idea to ensure you are up-to-date with your back-ups.

24 Feb 2007

Best wishes for a happy day and a great honeymoon.
John

22 Feb 2007

Turn the 9 and 11 timers over together. When the 9 runs out of sand immediately turn it over again. Put the egg in the pan when the 11 runs out - there will be 7 minutes of sand left in the 9 timer........... I think!

22 Feb 2007

Turn the 9 and 11 timers over together. When the 9 runs out of sand immediately turn it over again. Put the egg in the pan when the 11 runs out - there will be 7 minutes of sand left in the 9 timer........... I think!