Sadly, I cannot claim to have written this (lucky escape, I'm in enough trouble just for having read it!).
The Guys' Rules
Finally, the guys' side of the story.
We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.
Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
Sunday sports; it's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
Crying is blackmail.
Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
See a doctor.
Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
If something we said could be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.
If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.
Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.
You have enough clothes.
You have too many shoes.
I am in shape. Round is a shape.
Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Mind you, in fairness to RobClark he really cannot be accused of beating about the bush (so to speak).
He came right out with it and said it - he specified the gender, what he wants to do and where.
Maybe he went to the same sales conference I attended a few years ago - the trainer shocked everyone with a story about a guy standing outside a New York subway station, asking every attractive female if you would like a f**k. His friend, hearing what he was up to said "you must get slapped a lot". Yes, he said, but I also get f**ked a lot - the important thing is your slap / f**k ratio.
He came right out with it and said it - he specified the gender, what he wants to do and where.
Maybe he went to the same sales conference I attended a few years ago - the trainer shocked everyone with a story about a guy standing outside a New York subway station, asking every attractive female if you would like a f**k. His friend, hearing what he was up to said "you must get slapped a lot". Yes, he said, but I also get f**ked a lot - the important thing is your slap / f**k ratio.
Well, here goes. We have seen quite a number of postings suggesting that there are more than enough single guys / MMB / etc. And that what is needed sre more couples to get involved to redress the 1 to 150 ratio!
My partner and I have been playing around with this for a while - making love in the woods, her going out having been a touch careless with her underwear, and we will be experimenting with a club next week etc.
She is very keen to take the next step, and I must say i am not exactly discouraging her.
So what is the best way of going about it. Presumably turning up at a "location" is not going to be a bundle of laughs.
So for a couple of fumbling amateurs like us, should we post to say we would be interested on a particular evening at a particular time, and ask people to pm us so that we can restrict the audience? And what will the "audience" expect. I doubt whether first time my lady will be terribly keen on getting physical. Mind you, you never really know....
This may all seem a bit naieve, but we are genuinely interested and it sounds very exciting, so help please!
Many thanks in advance
My partner and I have been playing around with this for a while - making love in the woods, her going out having been a touch careless with her underwear, and we will be experimenting with a club next week etc.
She is very keen to take the next step, and I must say i am not exactly discouraging her.
So what is the best way of going about it. Presumably turning up at a "location" is not going to be a bundle of laughs.
So for a couple of fumbling amateurs like us, should we post to say we would be interested on a particular evening at a particular time, and ask people to pm us so that we can restrict the audience? And what will the "audience" expect. I doubt whether first time my lady will be terribly keen on getting physical. Mind you, you never really know....
This may all seem a bit naieve, but we are genuinely interested and it sounds very exciting, so help please!
Many thanks in advance
My partner and I are thining of going to a club - we are both first timers.
She would like somewhere where there are a reasonable number of non pushy single males. Looking through the ads, Rios seems to be a reasonable bet. Has anyone on here been there? And what do you think?
Oddly looking at the reviews there seem to be an equal number of complaints about too many single men, and not enough,at some of these places!
Weekends are out, but weekdays would be OK. What time of day would be best, and what could we expect.
(for the record, and to save the inevitable questions, in her youth she got into a few situations where she was on her knees with a cock in each hand and one in her mouth, and would love to recreate this, and to be honest I would love to watch!)
Thanks all
She would like somewhere where there are a reasonable number of non pushy single males. Looking through the ads, Rios seems to be a reasonable bet. Has anyone on here been there? And what do you think?
Oddly looking at the reviews there seem to be an equal number of complaints about too many single men, and not enough,at some of these places!
Weekends are out, but weekdays would be OK. What time of day would be best, and what could we expect.
(for the record, and to save the inevitable questions, in her youth she got into a few situations where she was on her knees with a cock in each hand and one in her mouth, and would love to recreate this, and to be honest I would love to watch!)
Thanks all
