Captain__calamity's Forum Posts

26 Dec 2005

I tried something similar with an old pot noodle.
It was quite good but my knob smelt of tomato for a week.

29 Oct 2005

Another Peter jackson film - Braindead.
Reminds me that I have to mow the garden

28 Oct 2005

Yes, I measured mine a week ago, although I had been avoiding it.
It measured 2 1/2 inches. Obviously this is a bit on the small size and I decided to do something about it. My best plan was to use 2 bags of frozen peas as weights, attached via a length of string. It is not too uncomfortable but I get funny looks when I go shopping as I have trouble fitting them down my trousers.
If anyone is interested I will infform everyone of my progress.

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26 Oct 2005

Yes a year ago he died .
No one could play a record at the wrong speed with such panache. I miss him.

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22 Oct 2005

This is a good question Phire.
I have just spent the past four hours looking at a gorgeous arse but feel it would be a bit lame to e-mail to tell her. I'm sure she already knows her attributes, and has had her fill.

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22 Oct 2005

I once squirted 110 feet. However I was on a motorbike at the time and I am quoting figures
according to Einsteins theory of relativity, from the perspective of a stationary bystander.
some of the above may be untrue.

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