Scenario:
Vanilla person looks at the forum, sees that members of the site are allowed to run events at a profit and thinks 'I might become a swinger and make some money'
Just a thought
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goldsmith
Over 90 days ago
Bisexual Female
Straight Male
0 miles · Staffordshire
Forum
So given all the previous posts, does that mean thats its ok to make a profit from social events or not?
Making a 'few bob'? When we went to the social I mentioned in my previous post, it was announced that there would be 'nibbles' and a maximum of 20 packs of crisps were put out, thats all. That was the total outlay of the night as far as I can see. This member must have made about £500 that night, and these events were held monthly for some time. That in my view is taking the piss big time. We went along as we hadn't been to a social of its type before, and after being there, we made our choice not to go again.
Yes people do spend a lot of time organising events, and again it's their choice. When I hold my social events, which generally tend to be a four course dinner, entertainment and a lovely venue, then the people who come love it, and know that they are only paying for the meal and nothing else. They didn't pay me, they paid the venue for their ticket which covered the cost of the meal (a discounted cost too). Believe me, through choice, I spend an huge amount of time making my social events lovely, and I think those that attend will verify this.
But it still comes down to the question - do the guidelines set out by SH stand?
I reiterate my previous point - if I invited people into my home, they would be considered guests, and I would no more dream of charging them admission than flying to the moon. It's just another way for some people to make money out of the swinging fraternity. If you can't do it for the social aspect, then its not a social, its a money making venture.
Making a 'few bob'? When we went to the social I mentioned in my previous post, it was announced that there would be 'nibbles' and a maximum of 20 packs of crisps were put out, thats all. That was the total outlay of the night as far as I can see. This member must have made about £500 that night, and these events were held monthly for some time. That in my view is taking the piss big time. We went along as we hadn't been to a social of its type before, and after being there, we made our choice not to go again.
Yes people do spend a lot of time organising events, and again it's their choice. When I hold my social events, which generally tend to be a four course dinner, entertainment and a lovely venue, then the people who come love it, and know that they are only paying for the meal and nothing else. They didn't pay me, they paid the venue for their ticket which covered the cost of the meal (a discounted cost too). Believe me, through choice, I spend an huge amount of time making my social events lovely, and I think those that attend will verify this.
But it still comes down to the question - do the guidelines set out by SH stand?
I reiterate my previous point - if I invited people into my home, they would be considered guests, and I would no more dream of charging them admission than flying to the moon. It's just another way for some people to make money out of the swinging fraternity. If you can't do it for the social aspect, then its not a social, its a money making venture.
Not for profit?? Yes those are the guidelines, and its been common practice for some people to run social events on a regular basis and make huge profits from them.
Example: We went to a social once, and there was a £5 door charge per person, the nibbles advertised were a bowl of crisps on a few of the tables, it was in a pub that didnt charge for the room hire as they made money over the bar from the 120 or so people that were there. The DJ was an SH member, not entirely sure if he got paid or not.
Now I am no mathmatician, but the figures speak for themselves. The organising member must have made at least £500 clear. These socials were held on a very regular basis.
When I made moves to run a social event, with food (proper food) at a ticket price of £9 per head, with all profit over the costs of the room hire and food going to a children's registered charity I was told it wasnt allowed.
Hmmmmmmm make me think. Better to let SH members benefit than a few disadvantaged kids.
I think to charge people you are inviting into your home is a bit much myself, and as was previously stated, if you are going to a house party, take your own drinks, and food if you have special requirements, then there is no additional cost to the hosts. After all isnt this a social thing, not a business opportunity.
Clubs do make money from the social events SH members organise, and thats their business to do that. Surely members arrange the socials to have a good night out with some of their SH friends. I think it will make life rather complicated if we have to pay for ads for a social event and I think you will find there will be fewer events because of it. Or 'underground' socials will prevail as a result.
Example: We went to a social once, and there was a £5 door charge per person, the nibbles advertised were a bowl of crisps on a few of the tables, it was in a pub that didnt charge for the room hire as they made money over the bar from the 120 or so people that were there. The DJ was an SH member, not entirely sure if he got paid or not.
Now I am no mathmatician, but the figures speak for themselves. The organising member must have made at least £500 clear. These socials were held on a very regular basis.
When I made moves to run a social event, with food (proper food) at a ticket price of £9 per head, with all profit over the costs of the room hire and food going to a children's registered charity I was told it wasnt allowed.
Hmmmmmmm make me think. Better to let SH members benefit than a few disadvantaged kids.
I think to charge people you are inviting into your home is a bit much myself, and as was previously stated, if you are going to a house party, take your own drinks, and food if you have special requirements, then there is no additional cost to the hosts. After all isnt this a social thing, not a business opportunity.
Clubs do make money from the social events SH members organise, and thats their business to do that. Surely members arrange the socials to have a good night out with some of their SH friends. I think it will make life rather complicated if we have to pay for ads for a social event and I think you will find there will be fewer events because of it. Or 'underground' socials will prevail as a result.
Quote by shad
Just had an easter egg given to me by my wonderful wife only to find when i opened it that it was thinner than the foil that enclosed it. I seem to remember that they were much thicker? It may be me being a grump again but i doubt it. Suspect it's just another example of being ripped off!
You miserable git!!!! Mrs S. go and buy him a big feck off bar of dairy milk and shove it up his bum, i bet he will notice how thick that is. See you Saturday grumpy!
:laughabove::laughabove::laughabove: Fair enough babe but you know i'm only happy when miserable! Promise i won't be on Saturday night though
I bloody hope not, or you will be banished forever x
Quote by Dirtygirly
This isnt good service guys, can we have some sort of explanation as to what is happening.
It's a bank holiday weekend. I'm sure when the whole team is back in the office tomorrow morning things will be fixed properly. There are three servers, one is down, the other two are working fine. If you can't get in immediately, either use the extras lounge and then move to server one or two or try the F5 trick.
Whilst it's not ideal, everyone is entitled to a holiday weekend.
So it will be sorted tomorrow when admin are back in work? Thats good. Whats the F5 trick I cant find the bit that tells me.
Quote by shad
Just had an easter egg given to me by my wonderful wife only to find when i opened it that it was thinner than the foil that enclosed it. I seem to remember that they were much thicker? It may be me being a grump again but i doubt it. Suspect it's just another example of being ripped off!
You miserable git!!!! Mrs S. go and buy him a big feck off bar of dairy milk and shove it up his bum, i bet he will notice how thick that is. See you Saturday grumpy!
This one keeps cropping up. Some people just are str8 and thats that, some are bi or curious, and some may change as time goes on. Its a funny old thing really..... I seem to get slated, and accused of being homophobic when I say we dont meet bi or bi curious guys, and the reason is not cos we dont want my hubby jumped on, its just our choice.
But I will say with 100% confidence that my hubby is str8 and I can't see anything that would make me feel he would ever be anything other than that.
Me however, I like ladies and men (well some ladies and some men) but I dont ever think to myself 'cor I fancy her', but if in a sexy situation, and both ladies are inclined, there can be fem/fem play which is great and most enjoyable for both the ladies and the guys.
But I will say with 100% confidence that my hubby is str8 and I can't see anything that would make me feel he would ever be anything other than that.
Me however, I like ladies and men (well some ladies and some men) but I dont ever think to myself 'cor I fancy her', but if in a sexy situation, and both ladies are inclined, there can be fem/fem play which is great and most enjoyable for both the ladies and the guys.
Quote by flower411
I see absolutely no reason to attach an age range to the words "step daughter" and to be honest I feel it says a lot about the people making the assumption.
As has already been stated, there is nothing illegal about finding your step daughter attractive, even to the point of marriage......in general terms I`d say it is socially unacceptable. Which brings us to the issue of what should or should not be banned in the chatrooms.
We have a situation that is not illegal but is socially unacceptable ......starting to ring any bells ?????
Once admin start to dictate the "morals" on the site, where will it stop.
When we see "younger for older" rooms do we immediately assume that the "younger" are under age ?? I certainly don`t !
If anybody suspects that something illegal is happening anywhere on the site they should report it immediately and if something illegal is happening admin have a responsibility to take things further than simply banning the culprits.
Having said all that ....I`d just like to add that on a personal level I do find it a bit strange that anybody would want to open a room to talk about their step daughters tits !!!
Lets assume as I think we should, that regardless of age, the stepdaughters of members would not generally be members of this site. I think most would agree with that. So is it ok to be discussing, in sexual terms, non members who have no idea what is going on and more to the point swapping photos.
Lets assume that members make a decision to send photos of their stepdaughters to other members of this site. And regardless of age, I find this totally outside of the swinging fraternity ethos, which by its very title is what this site is all about. I suppose its fine to find your stepdaughter attractive, but for God's sake, don't offer her photo's to strangers on a swinging site, which is what appeared to be going on in the room I mentioned in the OP.
When you talk about the example of 'younger' for 'older' you seem to forget that the 'younger' element are members of this site and therefore over 18. Members have a choice to meet younger or older members of this site.
Admin aren't, as far as I can see, dictating the morals of this site. What is actually happening is that the members themselves are expressing their concern about something that they feel is not acceptable and as a result admin are looking into it.
Quote by kentswingers777
And not an op in sight!!
Goes back to the arguement about having a couple of paid ops, especially on weekend nights to sort this kind of thing out.
All the ops are unpaid and do it as and when they can which is great but.....IF there were a couple of paid ones they could stop the rooms and ban the member.
No point the room running for hours and hours because nobody is about, and then doing something about it hours after the event....the damage is already done by then.
Awaits the reasons as to why not.
I have seen rooms closed in the past similar to this, also whilst on the subject of the AUP, I have also seen members banned and rooms closed in the past that were not part of the AUP guidelines.
The AUP is a guidance and am sure can be added too at any time.
Rooms like this are against most peoples common decency and on that basis I think Admin should look at adding this to the AUP?
Lets be honest here eh? Whilst the term " Stepdaughter " has no age attatched to it, to me it certainly implies someone very young.
Thanks Kenty, that was my concern all along and why I opened this thread.
Quote by goldsmith
So, if people are discussing the viewing of step daughters of other members, this is allowed? Is this what we are to understand. So if someone who had, say a 10 year old step daughter, that would be ok for them to be letting other members view their photos. I think not.
Your initial comment in this thread was to query the relevance of specific room names.
I have answered why the room was not closed purely on the grounds of its name.
The scenarios you now discuss are clearly detailed with the chatroom rules and site AUP and could have been dealt with accordingly.
a) If they took place on site
b) were reported to admin so they could be investigated.
I will again add (as I don't feel it was read first time) that I do not condone such rooms being opened.
Yes i did read that you didnt condone it, and I can understand why. I did report it to admin who said they had instructed the ops to close such rooms while it was all investigated.
From Admin: I still stand by my previous message that Ops are under instruction to close these rooms and we're monitoring the logs.
Quote by Ian
So, if people are discussing the viewing of step daughters of other members, this is allowed? Is this what we are to understand. So if someone who had, say a 10 year old step daughter, that would be ok for them to be letting other members view their photos. I think not.
Your initial comment in this thread was to query the relevance of specific room names.
I have answered why the room was not closed purely on the grounds of its name.
The scenarios you now discuss are clearly detailed with the chatroom rules and site AUP and could have been dealt with accordingly.
a) If they took place on site
b) were reported to admin so they could be investigated.
I will again add (as I don't feel it was read first time) that I do not condone such rooms being opened.
Yes i did read that you didnt condone it, and I can understand why. I did report it to admin who said they had instructed the ops to close such rooms while it was all investigated.
Quote by Ian
an op should talk to them
I went into the room during the afternoon, and the room creator was not present. I also received several pm's from concerned members.
The chatroom ops are only allowed to act when there has been a breach of either the chatroom rules or the site AUP.
This is an area which is I'm sure way outside of 99.9% of site members comfort zone, however we can not act on personal displeasure, or become moral guardians.
I took the time to make some research on the "legality" of the subject hoping to be able to close the room under the comment in the AUP regarding Anything illegal and contrary to the laws of England and Wales. :eeek: Under certain circumstances it is legal to even marry a step daughter.
Please understand, that in no way am I condoning such rooms, I'm not. All I am trying to do is explain why it wasn't closed.
So, if people are discussing the viewing the photos of step daughters of other members, this is allowed? Is this what we are to understand. So if someone who had, say a 10 year old step daughter, that would be ok for them to be letting other members view their photos. I think not.
There was no mention of age, all I, (and a couple of other members who went in to have a look to see what was going on) saw was people asking for photos of members stepdaughters, which is why I was so concerned. How do we know how old they are, after all we dont see them as they appear not to be members, but members stepdaughters who could be children. If this is deemed acceptable, then I am even more worried.
Another member who was as appalled as me, was asked in whisper if he had a stepdaughter.
Another member who was as appalled as me, was asked in whisper if he had a stepdaughter.
Quote by Kaznkev
It's the 'bum -sex' thing I think, we've had this debate before but then not all gay and bi guys do bum-sex but then how do you/we find out who's who and who does what? Anyways, bum-sex can take some planning but blow jobs are quite simple, and great.. and we all know they are much better from guys anyway
Good on you anyway for being honest goldsmith, we all have choices, I won't play with people who wee or poo on one another either as I think that's dirty but I will do bum-sex... sometimes ;)
Mr Powers - can we have a fiddle please? No bum sex... unless you beg and are OK doing it with you on your back as you have a nice face. Oh, and I like kissing too and doggy makes that difficult :twisted:
There does seem to be a lot more bi women 'out' then bi men on here, it seems socially/swingilly somehow more acceptable. However, my take on this is simple - if anyone tried to jump on me, regardless if their/my preference I'd tell them to 'stuff off' if I wasn't interested.
Bioke x
:thumbup: isnt complicated really is it ,and its summat most women learn at an early age
Well said Kaz xx
Quote by BIoke
It's the 'bum -sex' thing I think, we've had this debate before but then not all gay and bi guys do bum-sex but then how do you/we find out who's who and who does what? Anyways, bum-sex can take some planning but blow jobs are quite simple, and great.. and we all know they are much better from guys anyway
Good on you anyway for being honest goldsmith, we all have choices, I won't play with people who wee or poo on one another either as I think that's dirty but I will do bum-sex... sometimes ;)
Mr Powers - can we have a fiddle please? No bum sex... unless you beg and are OK doing it with you on your back as you have a nice face. Oh, and I like kissing too and doggy makes that difficult :twisted:
There does seem to be a lot more bi women 'out' then bi men on here, it seems socially/swingilly somehow more acceptable. However, my take on this is simple - if anyone tried to jump on me, regardless if their/my preference I'd tell them to 'stuff off' if I wasn't interested.
Bioke x
(':thumbup:');
Quote by Mr-Powers
Sorry, I wasn't implying that you were. I added that I didn't know your reasons, but I'm sure that some other couples would have that reason
I re read your post and edited mine, great minds think alike eh?
It would be good for people reading this topic to here your own personal reasons though, as I cant think of anything other than homophobia to a lesser or greater degree, and that exists within the theatrical community. Whether that's to a lesser or greater degree it does exist,
I am sure it would, but it really isn't important what the reasons are, they are our choices. If I was homophobic, would I be bi - I think not!
Perhaps not,but is your partner?
No - I don't like homophobic people, so I wouldn't be with him if he was. And if he was homophobic, would he be with me? I doubt it.
But your not a gay or bi guy are you,so why wouldn't he be with you.
homophobic - prejudiced against homosexual people - I suppose that means bi too, so that answers your question i think.
ah but what about the guys with the "i don't mind my bird having abit of lesbian sex but not two blokes,it ain't normal" mentality.
Well they are entitled to their opinions as we all are. But why should anyone have to justify their preferences? Let me reiterate though, that we both don't want to play with bi guys, not just silversmith.
Quote by Mr-Powers
Sorry, I wasn't implying that you were. I added that I didn't know your reasons, but I'm sure that some other couples would have that reason
I re read your post and edited mine, great minds think alike eh?
It would be good for people reading this topic to here your own personal reasons though, as I cant think of anything other than homophobia to a lesser or greater degree, and that exists within the theatrical community. Whether that's to a lesser or greater degree it does exist,
I am sure it would, but it really isn't important what the reasons are, they are our choices. If I was homophobic, would I be bi - I think not!
Perhaps not,but is your partner?
No - I don't like homophobic people, so I wouldn't be with him if he was. And if he was homophobic, would he be with me? I doubt it.
But your not a gay or bi guy are you,so why wouldn't he be with you.
homophobic - prejudiced against homosexual people - I suppose that means bi too, so that answers your question i think.
