Quote by wildwilly
Bawbag ~ scrotum
Seems I got this wrong, it is not a scrotum but a Ladies purse
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wildwilly
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 52
0 miles · Clackmannanshire
Forum
Casanova
Instructions:
For each answer, you will have three clues. Try to determine what the object or thing is that is being described. For every correct answer you give, give yourself 2 points, for every incorrect answer deduct 2 points.
If you score less than 14 points, you are gagging for it.
If you score between 14 points and 21 points, you are in need of some tender lovin.
If you score over 21 points, you are classed as "aright f****n' goer. (please PM me now)
Now please begin.
1. I am a protrusion that comes in many sizes.
When I'm not well, I drip.
When you blow me, you feel good.
2. I'm spread before I'm eaten.
Your tongue gets me off.
People sometimes lick my nuts.
3. I assist an erection.
Sometimes big balls hang from me.
I'm called a big swinger.
4. Over 1,000 people went down on me.
I wasn't maiden for long.
A big hard thing ripped me open.
5. You stick your poles inside me.
You tie me down to get me up.
I get wet before you do.
6. When I go in I cause pain.
I cause you to spit and ask you not to swallow.
I can fill your hole.
7. A finger goes in me.
You fiddle with me when you're bored.
The best man always has me first.
8. All day long, it's in and out.
I discharge loads from my shaft.
Both men and women go down on me.
9. I go in hard.
I come out soft.
You blow me hard.
10. If I miss, I hit your bush.
It's my job to stuff your box.
When I come, it's news.
11. I offer protection.
I get the finger ten times.
You use your fingers to get me off.
12. I have a stiff shaft.
My tip penetrates.
I come with a quiver
13. My business is briefs.
I am a cunning linguist.
I plead and plead for it.
The Answers:
1. nose
2. peanut butter
3. crane
4. Titanic
5. tent
6. dentist
7. wedding ring
8. elevator
9. chewing gum
10. newspaper boy
11. glove
12. arrow
13. lawyer
For each answer, you will have three clues. Try to determine what the object or thing is that is being described. For every correct answer you give, give yourself 2 points, for every incorrect answer deduct 2 points.
If you score less than 14 points, you are gagging for it.
If you score between 14 points and 21 points, you are in need of some tender lovin.
If you score over 21 points, you are classed as "aright f****n' goer. (please PM me now)
Now please begin.
1. I am a protrusion that comes in many sizes.
When I'm not well, I drip.
When you blow me, you feel good.
2. I'm spread before I'm eaten.
Your tongue gets me off.
People sometimes lick my nuts.
3. I assist an erection.
Sometimes big balls hang from me.
I'm called a big swinger.
4. Over 1,000 people went down on me.
I wasn't maiden for long.
A big hard thing ripped me open.
5. You stick your poles inside me.
You tie me down to get me up.
I get wet before you do.
6. When I go in I cause pain.
I cause you to spit and ask you not to swallow.
I can fill your hole.
7. A finger goes in me.
You fiddle with me when you're bored.
The best man always has me first.
8. All day long, it's in and out.
I discharge loads from my shaft.
Both men and women go down on me.
9. I go in hard.
I come out soft.
You blow me hard.
10. If I miss, I hit your bush.
It's my job to stuff your box.
When I come, it's news.
11. I offer protection.
I get the finger ten times.
You use your fingers to get me off.
12. I have a stiff shaft.
My tip penetrates.
I come with a quiver
13. My business is briefs.
I am a cunning linguist.
I plead and plead for it.
The Answers:
1. nose
2. peanut butter
3. crane
4. Titanic
5. tent
6. dentist
7. wedding ring
8. elevator
9. chewing gum
10. newspaper boy
11. glove
12. arrow
13. lawyer
Casanova
Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle aged couple, and a young newlywed couple, wanted to join a church. The minister said, "We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks."
The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks. The minister asked the elderly couple, "Were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?"
The old man replied, "No problem at all, minister ."
"Congratulations! Welcome to the church." said the minister .
The minister went to the middle aged couple and asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for the two week?"
The man replied, "The first week was not too bad. The second week I had to sleep on the couch for a couple of nights, but, yes, we made it."
"Congratulations! Welcome to the church." said the minister .
The minister then went to the newlywed couple and asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for two weeks?"
"Well, minister , we were not able to go without sex for the two weeks." the young man replied.
"What happened?" inquired the minister .
"My wife was reaching for a tin of beans on the top shelf and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there."
"You understand, of course, this means you will not be welcome in our church." stated the minister .
"That's OK." said the young man, "We're not welcome at Safeway any more either."
The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks. The minister asked the elderly couple, "Were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?"
The old man replied, "No problem at all, minister ."
"Congratulations! Welcome to the church." said the minister .
The minister went to the middle aged couple and asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for the two week?"
The man replied, "The first week was not too bad. The second week I had to sleep on the couch for a couple of nights, but, yes, we made it."
"Congratulations! Welcome to the church." said the minister .
The minister then went to the newlywed couple and asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for two weeks?"
"Well, minister , we were not able to go without sex for the two weeks." the young man replied.
"What happened?" inquired the minister .
"My wife was reaching for a tin of beans on the top shelf and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there."
"You understand, of course, this means you will not be welcome in our church." stated the minister .
"That's OK." said the young man, "We're not welcome at Safeway any more either."
Casanova
I thought I wid gie yes aw a wee snatch 
aw ra lingo
Shoofty ~ look :shock:
Glakit ~ a Fifer
Scunnered ~ fed up
Hakit ~ a female from Fife
Eejit ~ the town moron
Bochle ~ a small person
Bawheid ~ baldy git
Bawbag ~ scrotum
Tumshie-heid ~ noodle bonce
Snarglefrumpets ~ (noun) wee beesties that live up yir lum
Wee ~ (adj.) small
Beesties ~ (noun) members of the animal kingdom, and people from Fife
Lum ~ (noun) chimley
Oot ~ out
Wisnae ~ as in "it wisnae me that felt yir erse"
Erse ~ "Ah’ hope yir ears turn into Erses n’ shite aw’oor yir shoodurs"
Scabby ~ " away ye go ya big scabby pluke"
Keech ~ a wee jobby
Dizinae ~ does not
Daud ~ "is that a daud o’ shite on the end of yir nob"
Giz a thribble o’ yir nibblets
aw ra lingo Shoofty ~ look :shock:
Glakit ~ a Fifer
Scunnered ~ fed up
Hakit ~ a female from Fife
Eejit ~ the town moron
Bochle ~ a small person
Bawheid ~ baldy git
Bawbag ~ scrotum
Tumshie-heid ~ noodle bonce
Snarglefrumpets ~ (noun) wee beesties that live up yir lum
Wee ~ (adj.) small
Beesties ~ (noun) members of the animal kingdom, and people from Fife
Lum ~ (noun) chimley
Oot ~ out
Wisnae ~ as in "it wisnae me that felt yir erse"
Erse ~ "Ah’ hope yir ears turn into Erses n’ shite aw’oor yir shoodurs"
Scabby ~ " away ye go ya big scabby pluke"
Keech ~ a wee jobby
Dizinae ~ does not
Daud ~ "is that a daud o’ shite on the end of yir nob"
Giz a thribble o’ yir nibblets
Casanova
David Becknum was wearing a Sarong for a while, isnt that a type of dress?
I seem to also remember Jonathan ross wearing a "man skirt" a couple of years ago but these arent people we would assume to be cross dresers, more like people with no dress sence.
To fully cross dress I would assume you would have to go slightly further than sticking on some ghastly floral patterned voluminous frock and actually shave some of the fur off hair poking through stockings ..eeeeeew not nice, or a hairy chest cascading over a bra ok on a women but on a guy hmmm not to sure about that one.
I used to wear a pair of the wifes tights when I was working on the building sites for a living, I stopped wearing her thong coz I didnt shave my bikini line so I just looked like I was hiding a poodle in my pants, but I didnt consider it as cross dressing or wearing womens clothes, just keeping my nads warm in the cold winter months. I hear the SAS wear tights and i Wouldnt call them CDs (at least not to their faces)
I seem to also remember Jonathan ross wearing a "man skirt" a couple of years ago but these arent people we would assume to be cross dresers, more like people with no dress sence.
To fully cross dress I would assume you would have to go slightly further than sticking on some ghastly floral patterned voluminous frock and actually shave some of the fur off hair poking through stockings ..eeeeeew not nice, or a hairy chest cascading over a bra ok on a women but on a guy hmmm not to sure about that one.
I used to wear a pair of the wifes tights when I was working on the building sites for a living, I stopped wearing her thong coz I didnt shave my bikini line so I just looked like I was hiding a poodle in my pants, but I didnt consider it as cross dressing or wearing womens clothes, just keeping my nads warm in the cold winter months. I hear the SAS wear tights and i Wouldnt call them CDs (at least not to their faces)
:cheers:
:cheers: Casanova
Mrs. Willy & I saw 'The Grudge' last night, I came away slightly confused (not always too difficult). Mrs Willy only watched the first 20 mins or so then hid behind her popcorn or kept her eyes closed. WHY did she want to see it in the first place ? and surely its worse to keep your eyes closed cos you are leaving more to your own imagination.
The film itself was confusing too, I was wondering had anyone read the original book, possibly the original was in Japanese, but was the original more symbolic, and the meaning behind the film was just lost on a western audience, or did it loose something in translation, or was it just crap???
The film itself was confusing too, I was wondering had anyone read the original book, possibly the original was in Japanese, but was the original more symbolic, and the meaning behind the film was just lost on a western audience, or did it loose something in translation, or was it just crap???
Casanova
I will be attending my first munch in March. At first I was disappointed at having to wait so long for one I could actually reach, however the wait has been a blessing, I have lost my bouncy over-excited puppy newbie-type posts, and now spend more time reading others. From this I am learning a lot about my fellow members of SH ,
who likes what and where and when (me: anything, anywhere, anytime
)
The content of my posts has also changed (subtly perhaps, maybe well ok its still crap) they are more honest, I talk about my kids, how wonderfully quiet they are
WHEN I AM TRYING TO F****NG WORK
Now I am enjoying the site much more and I have actually started flirting with someone.
What I am saying is a munch is an opportunity to meet people who enjoy some of the same things as you, but that does not necessarily mean that you will get on with everyone, take the time to get to know everyone, and when next a munch is in your area, you might have all of us asking to sleep on your couch. :sleeping:
who likes what and where and when (me: anything, anywhere, anytime
)The content of my posts has also changed (subtly perhaps, maybe well ok its still crap) they are more honest, I talk about my kids, how wonderfully quiet they are
WHEN I AM TRYING TO F****NG WORK
Now I am enjoying the site much more and I have actually started flirting with someone.
What I am saying is a munch is an opportunity to meet people who enjoy some of the same things as you, but that does not necessarily mean that you will get on with everyone, take the time to get to know everyone, and when next a munch is in your area, you might have all of us asking to sleep on your couch. :sleeping:
Casanova
Police arrested Malcolm Davidson, a 27 year old white male, resident of White Plains, NY, in a pumpkin patch. Davidson was charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication.
The suspect stated that as he was passing a pumpkin patch, he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't." he stated in a phone interview from the County courthouse jail.
Davidson continued that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need".
"I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process, Davidson apparently failed to notice the White Plains police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him.
"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor. "I walked up to (Davidson) and he's...just working away at this pumpkin."
Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Davidson. "I just went up and said, "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?"
He got real surprised, as you'd expect, and then looked me straight in the face and said, "A pumpkin!? Damn... is it midnight already?"
The suspect stated that as he was passing a pumpkin patch, he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't." he stated in a phone interview from the County courthouse jail.
Davidson continued that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need".
"I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process, Davidson apparently failed to notice the White Plains police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him.
"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor. "I walked up to (Davidson) and he's...just working away at this pumpkin."
Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Davidson. "I just went up and said, "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?"
He got real surprised, as you'd expect, and then looked me straight in the face and said, "A pumpkin!? Damn... is it midnight already?"
Casanova
I have officially finished work for the day :happy:
I have a beer open :cheers:
and I have my Friday feeling :bounce:
A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the class was squirming around, scratching his crotch and not paying attention. She went back to find out what was going on. He was quite embarrassed and whispered that he had just recently been circumcised and he was quite itchy.
The teacher told him to go down to the principal's office. He was to phone his mother and ask her what he should do about it. He did it and returned to his class. Suddenly, there was a commotion at the back of the room. She went back to investigate only to find him sitting at his desk with his willy hanging out. "I thought I told you to call your mom." she screamed.
"I did," he said, "And she told me that if I could stick it out till lunchtime, she'd come and pick me up from school."
I have a beer open :cheers:
and I have my Friday feeling :bounce:
A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the class was squirming around, scratching his crotch and not paying attention. She went back to find out what was going on. He was quite embarrassed and whispered that he had just recently been circumcised and he was quite itchy.
The teacher told him to go down to the principal's office. He was to phone his mother and ask her what he should do about it. He did it and returned to his class. Suddenly, there was a commotion at the back of the room. She went back to investigate only to find him sitting at his desk with his willy hanging out. "I thought I told you to call your mom." she screamed.
"I did," he said, "And she told me that if I could stick it out till lunchtime, she'd come and pick me up from school."
Casanova
:laughabove: bloody hell its Friday again, what the hell am I doing still working. Anyway here is my "Fridays joke" inspired by above.A shy gentleman was preparing to board a plane when he heard that the Pope was on the same flight.
"This is exciting," thought the gentleman. "I've always been a big fan of the Pope. Perhaps I'll be able to see him in person. Imagine his surprise when the Pope sat down in the seat next to him for the flight. Still, the gentleman was too shy to speak to the Pontiff.
Shortly after take-off, the Pope began a crossword puzzle. "This is fantastic," thought the gentleman. "I'm really good at crosswords. Perhaps, if the Pope gets stuck, he'll ask me for assistance."
Almost immediately, the Pope turned to the gentleman and said, "Excuse me, but do you know a four letter word referring to a woman that ends in 'u-n-t'?"
Only one word leapt to mind. "My goodness," thought the gentleman, "I can't tell the Pope that. There must be another." The gentleman thought for quite a while, then it hit him. Turning to the pope, the gentleman said, "I think you're looking for the word 'aunt'."
"Of course," said the Pope. "Do you have an eraser?"
Casanova
Quote by Ice Pie
I'm slightly worried by the fact that the guy in the first pic appears to be in a state of arousal. Still, whatever floats his boat I suppose. :shock:
I think that is the only way he could carry that dress off. Otherwise he might look like the wicked witch in The Wizard of Oz "I'm melting, i'm melting...."
