Sex Toys Review (3)

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Once again, our dedicated reviewers and testers have put a range of products to the test...

The Patricia Parris Sweet Tickling Maid
Reviewed by 'Luckier'

In my review of the Pink Fleshlight in SHM Issue 1, I said that 'I have tried a whole range of many different sex toys, among them quite a few artificial vaginas, vibrating and otherwise, semi realistic and not so realistic, so on the occasions I have tried out yet another disappointing new masturbator that was meant to be the next best thing to a real live pussy, I usually ended up slinging it in the bin' - and unfortunately, this was one of those that got slung! For the record, the Patricia Parris Sweet Tickling Maid did nothing for me whatsoever. Even though the item is - as the box says - made from a material that is nice and soft to touch, and has a nice feel to it, it's the pussy and anal tunnels that let it down. If there are some guys that feel the Fleshlight was slightly small and tight to enter, then this one is more or less impossible. It's to do with the scale - I'd say this is more like a Barbie Doll version. The one thing in its favour, I guess, is the multispeed vibrator that can be conveniently slotted into the back of the pussy tunnel to give stimulating sensations to your penis when you make entry, but in summary, this toy is offering nothing new and it's not one that I would recommend to you.

Price, from CherryBliss, £43.95 - a massive £31 saving on the normal RRP
Supplied by

AnoVibe plus Anal Vibrator
Reviewed by 'Luckier'

There seem to be quiet a few anal vibrating beads on the market these days for those who are either experimenting with anal sex or for those who have tried it out and are now enjoying it on a regular basis. This is actually the second of the anal vibrating bead toys that I have used, and I must admit, I found this one to be quite irresistible! It is basically a wand of firm but flexible vibrating anal beads, with a waterproof egg to provide the power. In the online ads for this product, it says 'try it once and you'll be hooked', which is probably the best way to sum it up.

But if I was asked why I like this one so much, I would say that this one is slightly smaller in length than the other I have used (not such a large base for batteries, as this uses only one), and the beaded shaft is slightly slimmer but contains the same amount of beads. The pleasure beads decrease in size towards the tip, which makes it very comfortable for anal entry and probing. The strong vibrating sensations with this one are another bonus that, yes, will make you want to leave it inside you as long as possible. So I guess its true to say that just because you have tried one toy that you think does the trick perfectly, it is always worth trying out another, even if the comparisons are only subtle, they can still make all the difference. For me, the AnoVibe is the one that works best because of its size, its strong vibrations, and its greater flexibility to tease, stimulate and satisfy.

Square Bulbs Anal Vibrator
Reviewed by 'Luckier'

This is another anal toy that warrants comparison to the one I reviewed in last month's issue (the Beadazzled Anal Tool). Although both toys are very similar and both are as good as each other, the Beadazzled is more suitable for beginners or for those who want to find out whether they like anal stimulation or not, while this one is better suited for those who are now looking to get more adventurous.

Again the differences may be subtle but without question, the Square Bulbs Anal Vibrator has the edge for a number of reasons. Its two individual vibrating and rotating features (controlled by individual controls) are altogether much stronger, and although, it has the same kind of ribbed beaded shaft and action as the Bedazzled, it is bigger in size and because it is made from a non-toxic anti-bacterial plastic (in sexy black), this one has the advantage of somehow working its way into your anal entry more or less by itself, with an almost unbelievable ability to squirm its way further inside you for the deep and sensuous probing you crave - which is ideal for anal sex. It's probably because the multispeed vibrator (with reversible rotation) is positioned at the top of the ribbed shaft that it has this unique ability. So, if you have already tried out the Beadazzled and are now ready to go to the next stage of anal stimulation and excitement, I would recommend this one, especially if you want your hands free for masturbating your penis and genitals, which for me, is always a must when you have a toy like this working away anally, and doing all that you want it to do to increase the stimulation of your orgasm and ejaculation. Certainly worth a try - see if it does to you what it does for me, whether on your own, or having it administered by your playmate!

Latex Mini Dress from the Sharon Sloane Latex Collection

This garment is not a 'sex toy' as such - but certainly something to wear for playing rather than, say, to the office... and it's very much in keeping with our rubber/latex theme in this issue.

Available in small, medium and large sizes (for 8-10, 10-12 and 12-14 sizes respectively), this shaped, figure-hugging dress is one you'll need to shoe-horn yourself into to look effective, even if over a totally dry body (a dusting of the recommended latex dressing aid may help) - and on that basis, don't flatter yourself by ordering a smaller size than your usual. Clingy and skintight is basic, but even though the latex is robustly stretchy, it won't look good if you're struggling to get it on!

Once on, it feels good - and, I might even venture to say, does a good job of streamlining the contours (although if not particularly well endowed in the breast department, it can streamline them too...). Not only did it feel slinky, but my companion made all the right appreciative noises and reactions in response.

Very simple in style (probably the most basic in the range which includes a short top, even shorter crop top, asymmetric slashed swimsuit, plunge-necked 'erotic' dress, single-shoulder mini dress and short negligee-style jacket)), the dress - and all the other items - has a flat black finish.

For a real wet-look shine, the manufacturers recommend using a silicon release agent - the 'Super Shiner'.

Easy Latex Dressing Aid £9.99
Latex Super Shiner £5.99
Supplied by

Beginner's Strap-on for Him From the Fetish Fantasy Series

What a fantastic bit of kit as a starter for a couple. In a close heterosexual relationship, most men will have had their anus licked or fingered by their partner. And, while, not being in any way gay or bisexual, will have yearned for a little more penetration to hit the 'P' spot. This product answers the question.We asked a couple to review it.

He: 'We had played around before with fingers and D's mini-vibes but this just felt so different. I was being fucked but by the only person I have ever loved. It was such a turnon. We had a few drinks before we tried it, bit the bullet and then just said "Let's have a go." It was a totally new experience to me but one that I want to repeat.'

She: 'I knew that J liked anal stimulation and we'd even used ice cubes during fellatio, but this was something different. The first time we used it I felt a bit silly putting on the harness, but once we got going, any embarrassment just disappeared as he was obviously in seventh heaven. I don't know what the so-called 'P' spot is, but if it's anything like I feel, then it must be good.

I also got really turned on myself, as I had the experience of 'fucking' my lover. A new feeling for me, and, I guess, many women.' On the technical front, this is a strap-on with a four-inch pliable dildo. But it also comes complete with a tube of toy-cleaner, a tube of personal lube, three interchangeable 'O' rings to fix larger dongs, if and when required, and a mask to add to the frisson.

The suppliers tell us that 'It's flying off the shelves' - and we'd definitely say it's worth giving it a try.

Supplied by

Exotik - Waterproof Rabbit

This is a beautifully streamlined piece of kit. Waterproof, with soft-touch controls for the rotating main shaft and the rabbit, the pink see-through gel-look casing reveals the working columns of steel beads in the 23-cm shaft and the vibrating bullet in the rabbit. It needs three AAA batteries (not included), but once you power it up you can take it through the three speeds of rotation and vibration (all you need - more gradations of speed a superfluous luxury) - and it's impressively smooth, powerful and quiet.

I tried it first in the bath - after all, it is waterproof. It certainly lives up to the manufacturer's claims of being powerful - but as with any battery-powered implement, there's a balance between the two functions. If you ratchet the rabbit up to full power then turn on the rotating action, the vibration diminishes, and will continue to do so if you increase the rotating power. I found the best effects with a balance of full-power rabbit vibration and one-third power rotation. However, I would say that under water, the tendency with the rotating action is to make that nice bunny attention slip sideways off the target!

It's the rabbit element which has revolutionised vibrating toys, and beyond doubt this is the best feature of the 'Exotik' - and used on its own, it delivers a really strong vibration that definitely did the business for me. The rotation (three speeds, clockwise or anti-clockwise) was an interesting addition - but not 'the main event' as far as I was concerned. Nice - but not essential.

I'm sure there are cheaper rabbits available - but this one runs with a reassuring, low hum and delivers a strong level of power, along with the additional bonus of being totally waterproof - and it really is a pleasure to use!

Orgasm Gel

The principle of this pinky gloop is that the menthol additive takes it a step up from ordinary lubes, promising a warming sensation and a tingle as you apply it - leading to 'stronger and more intense orgasms'. From reading to review The Orgasmic Diet in Issue 2, I can confirm the basic theory that anything that increases the bloodflow to the genital area is likely to improve sensitivity and intensify the experience of sex - but I'm not absolutely convinced that this is what Orgasm Gel does. Because it's mentholated, I found it had a cooling rather than warming effect, and that the sensation was, if anything, slightly numbing - and it didn't really make any difference overall.

As with any of these products, it's very much down to a matter of taste - if you like minty cool on your clit, go for it... but irrespective of taste, I'd say that £6.95 (a saving of £3 on the RRP), is quite a lot to pay for something not dissimilar to that underground psychic jelly that pervades the New York sewers in Ghostbusters II. Perhaps being mentholated it ought to be cool blue or minty green... but I doubt that would make any difference.

Supplied by