Year 1987, I was 19. I had always been a late bloomer. When my friends are dating and enjoying their sexual exploration, I was a conscientious student. If not doing homework, I spent my weekends going to libraries and reading books, or browsing second hand ones to buy on my meagre allowance.

Tuck at the back of this small bookshop in our town was a bin full of discarded books. Some have water damage,  others without cover.  You can take what you want, the owner said. I didn't noticed him looking at me from behind the counter.  Are you sure? I asked.  They are just going to skip anyway, he replied.  I filled up my rucksack with whatever I can take. Who doesn't want freebies?

I walked home all excited. Everyone's out for the day. I hurried upstairs and locked my room, picked up the first book from the pile in my bag. This one has no cover, on the second page it has a title "IT" but the author's details have been ripped. 

It was an erotic story of a woman in her 20's discovering her sexual peak, fulfilled by an older man. It got me excited, this is me. I always have crushes on older men,  my teachers, my Dad's friends, among others.  Reading through the intimate and provocative details of the book, I felt a strong sexual desire developing in the pit of my stomach going down to my pussy. I felt myself, I am wet.

I put the book down, removed my jeans and panties and opened my legs wide.  My fingers found my clit, throbbing from arousal, rubbed it slowly at first,  faster and faster as my whole cunt became covered with wetness. I had played with myself in the past, triggered by puberty.  But this one is different, I was more than aroused.  I inserted a finger in my tight cunt, fucking myself in and out,  deeper where my fingers can feel an obstruction. I haven't been penetrated by a man so my hymen is still intact.  I wanted more, inserted another finger, 2 fingers going inside, made easier by my dripping wetness. I fucked myself senseless,  faster and deeper and vigorously.  I can feel myself building into an orgasm so strong,  when I reached the peak, I was screaming in ecstasy. I couldn't stop cumming, I was convulsing. After several minutes, once my body calmed down, my bed was soaked. That's the first time I squirted.

I still gets aroused by erotic stories, my hands automatically reaches out to my sex if I am reading one. I also like to play with myself, even when in a relationship.  I have a few collection of  sexual toys. My favourite one is the black mamba, the size and girth is similar to my partner. We like to use it together when we role play a threesome. He recently gifted me with a 2 in 1 clit suction and vibrating dildo that makes me cum in seconds, while he wanks his cock as he watches me play.

I have lost the book years ago when I moved. I tried searching it online but can't find if it was published.  I have pushed the boundaries of sex so many times, thanks to this book that started my awakening.