I had been so engrossed in being Belinda King, - my second name taken from someone played by a role model, Tara King in The Avengers TV series-that I had not noticed my parents’ bedroom door being pushed open. I looked up and like a startled female deer and was blinded by a series of flashes as the old man with the camera made full use of his motor drive to capture and take away all of my female innocence. His film would soon make its way to a friend who had a market for that sort of stuff if I did not do as this disgruntled family retainer commanded. It may not sound true, but it is true. I am writing this because I am trying to understand myself. I know nothing will stop me wanting to offer myself to horrible men, and he was the start of it. If readers want more, then I will write. To all of those wanting to meet me, please be patient. I am seeing a lot of men at the moment, but don’t want to disappoint anyone. Anyway, I was about to be on the receiving end of serious and aggressive sexual humiliation and to learn also about how certain men felt about upper class females like myself and my mother. According to the old man, we were all spoiled cock teasing bitches and sluts who deserved a seeing to. The old man with the camera had worked on our family estate since before I was born. As his physical powers declined, he had stopped working on our farm and moved into a job doing general maintenance and looking after the stables. He was often in the house, leering at my mother and sisters whenever he saw them. Screwing his grizzled face up into angry smile, he looked down at me, saying in a rasping voice: ‘Nice, very nice, I’d love ter get my big cock up that little lot. Now slut, if yer know what’s best fer yer, go dressing. I wanna see yer in that lovely slip. I know it’s one of yer mummy’s. Yer look like her with all that make up and curly blonde hair. I have always wanted to see that stuck up bitch stripped and cut down ter size. I knew you were girlie and been waitin to catch yer with me camera for a long time, and it’s been worth it, now get that slip on you spoiled little slut.’ My small hands were trembling as I pulled the satin slip up, wriggling the top and flimsy black straps up over my puny chest and narrow little shoulders. I felt very small in front of him. The thick set photographer’s camera clicked away several shots. These were the days before digital photography, so I knew he had no more than 36 shots to play with. ‘Lovely, lovely’ he rasped as I stood their almost cowering in my mothers exquisite black satin lingerie, high heels and make up. ‘I like yer big blue eyes and those sexy lips slut. I want those painted lips around my cock in a minute. But I want yer fully dressed my posh little whore. I was mesmerised like a rabbit caught in car headlights. He looked at the skirt suit and chiffon blouse I had laid ready on the bed. I was eager to cover my lingerie as I felt very silly, vulnerable and humiliated standing in front of an ugly old man with a camera in his hand. So I reached for the blouse, quickly getting it on and doing up the buttons. His gimlet eyes cut into my chest. ‘I always get the horn when I see yer mother dressed up, the cock teasing bitch. If she don’t want men ter see her underwear and get the horn for her, why does she wear blouses that yer can see right through ter her fancy bloody underwear?’ I reached quickly for the tight fitting knee length skirt. ‘No, not that one. I want yer in that blue one I saw her go to church in last week. I wanna see yer in that because she gave me the horn when her old man drove her back and she got out of the car and I saw up her skirt, and I saw her petticoat and her little white shiney knickers. Made the bitch blush because I saw what she wore ter cover her posh little cunt. Way she dresses, she needs real men up her, not that poncey father of yours. He never did a day’s work in his life, just tells the rest of us what to do. Now I’m telling his sissy bitch son what ter do. If yer don’t do it, I’ll make sure other men see these pictures.’ My mother’s wardrobes were large and she had a private dressing room. I was embarrassed teetering across the floor, reeking of Chanel No 5 and wearing four inch black patent leather high heels. I felt so delicate and pretty, walking with clenched buttocks, because it came natu me, knowing he was watching. As I walked, I heard more clicks of his camera. My button cock was too tightly held to stiffen but my tiny balls were tingling with embarrassment, pushed up in front of my pubic bone and held firm by the black pantie corsolette. Having agreed on which skirt suit I should wear, I took the expensive fully lined fitted skirt and jacket. Nervously dressing in front of him, my hands shaking as I fumbled to do up the buttons. With seamed stockings straight and everything else about me immaculate, he had me sit on the bed for various poses and then up against the wall. Still standing against the wall, slim stockinged legs primly together, I watched him walk over to my mother’s dressing table and carefully put down the camera. When he walked back towards me, his brown eyes were looking me up and down as if he was looking at a good dinner. Our eyes meeting, I saw only anger and hatred in them and knew that I was in for some very nasty treatment. Now he was very close to me, I could smell his stale breath and saw his rotten teeth. Stooping down, he thrust one rough hand under my skirt, soon having my thighs parted, then abruptly up my skirt to grab and crush my sex through my corsolette. ‘So fuckin’ sexy, just like your mother’ he mumbled before crushing his dirty mouth against mine, opening my thighs further before punching my helpless sex mound hard, making me gasp. As my mouth opened, he forced his rancid tongue into my virgin mouth. The punching seemed to go on forever and I would have doubled over if he hadn’t been pressing me so hard to the wall. He then withdrew from my mouth, stopped punching me, looked down at my skirt and began pulling it and the lace and satin slip up until the tight vee of my corsolette, stocking tops and suspenders were on view. Grabbing my crotch with his big gnarled right hand, he said ;’yer a real little sissy ain’t yer, got nothing there, just like a fuckin girl. His other hand grabbed at my breasts. ‘There’s somethin’ wrong with yer bitch, you got little tits too. You are a girl and you don’t half need treating like one, and I don’t mean like a lady. You need some real hard fucking by some real hard men.’ I bowed my head, not wanting to look him in the eye, as he started rubbing and squeezing my pantie covered and bulging bald sex mound, He pulled my little jacket open and was really hurting my nipples through my blouse slip and corsolette, working to hurt my sex and breasts as much as he could. Big fingers were inside my pantie teasing my slit while alternatively crushing and rubbing my balls through my undies. His old wrinkled face and bald head made a horrible, but strangely arousing sight. Being at his mercy made me feel so beautifully helpless and feminine. He had my sexual essence in his cruel hands when he said: ‘I am going to make you cum you stuck up little slut, then I am going to punch you in the cunt and make your cry. At that moment, hearing those words, I felt myself starting to cum. He sensed it, drew back, drew back his big right fist, then began punching me so very hard, over and over again as I had the most humiliating orgasm. When he had had enough of hitting and insulting me, he let me slump to the floor in tears, while he went to get his camera. I kept my eyes covered as I heard more camera flashes. Then there was a moment while he put the camera away again. When he came back, I took a sneaky peep from tear stained eyes to see him opening his rough old workman’s trousers, then unleashing an enormous and thick penis, pulling back his foreskin to reveal its livid purple throbbing head. I moved my tiny hands away from my eyes, and looked up at him, defenceless, my skirt and slip still ruckled, the crotch of my pantie corsolette damp from thee small ejaculation of my micro penis. He was wanking himself, nudging a booted foot against my pantie, when he said: ‘Right bitch, now it’s time to suck my cock. You are goin’ ter get it big time. You wanna be a little lady, well I’m showin yer what bein’ a lady’s all about.’ With that he kicked my sex in an act of total dominance, and I felt utterly submissive, my sex tingling at the thought of what he wanted and was going to do to me. Soon I was on all fours, still dressed, looking up at the monster penis that was going to fuck my mouth. He kept slapping my face and pulling my hair as he thrust down my throat, making me gag, calling me names before shooting his vile viscous load down my throat. This was the beginning. He broke his word about the photos. They went to his friend to be developed and that is why I had to go to the cinema in the blue skirt suit, satin lingerie, perfume, high heels and make up. I was abused in the back row and taken to a house to have my first electric shock treatment and to be stripped to bra, suspender belt and high heels for dirty old men to rub their cocks between my thighs and to fuck their cocks against the timid head of my circumcised micro penis, cumming all over hit before each of them slapped my bald sex mound, Then they hurt me there, making me cum, hitting it as I came and laughing at me. The old man made sure he knew where I was at university, regularly visiting me with his friends and making me go out into dangerous places, using photos to blackmail me. That is how I lost my anal virginity, staying in my flat and sending me out all dressed up, over and over again. They wanted me to be a virgin when it happened and they wanted strangers to do it to me. Strangers, horrible strangers have been doing it to me ever since. The story of that first time I was fucked in the dark, by several men is already on this website and so this story brings my early life up to date. I could write more, but I now think it is time to write about what is happening to me now. Readers can see pictures of me in my student and later years on my site page and read more about me by searching slim blonde transvestite. In a way, I wish my stories were fantasies, but they are true. Looking back, I wish I had changed sex all those years ago, then nasty men could have really fucked me in my vagina.