You really can't say there's anything remotely pleasureable about travelling on London's underground network in the rush hour in the summer. To get to my modestly-paid secretarial job in the City, I have to endure 13 station stops, invariably strap-hanging. By the time I reach Bank, I'm often like a damp rag. Ring my dress out and water would probably drip out. But I have to endure it. I'm a single mother, with twin toddlers at play school to support. Working in a swanky City bank, getting groped by male executives while I'm using the photocopier, can have its rewards. But that's a story for another time! What I want to tell you about now is a wicked plan me and my friend Sharon worked out for making our return journey back to East Acton each evening a bit more exciting. Sharon and I get ourselves into a cosy corner of the crowded train carriage, waiting for unsuspecting City toffs to be pushed up close to us. Though they're reading their evening newspapers, they're all to aware that a sweet-smelling young totty is pushing her hips into their crotch! Then we make the first move. Concealed by the crush and with angelically-blank faces, our hand goes to the guy's zip fly and slowly slides it down. They stare all the harder at their boring newspaper articles and can't believe what's happening 'down there' is for real! But it is babes! Now I've got your semi-stiff prick out from your trousers! Now I'm going to wank you off! In a railway carriage! In public! Of course, it seldom takes long. Sharon reckons her record is 90 seconds - but she's always been an exaggerating bitch. Three minutes flat is my best time. And as you feel them twitch before that first spasm, you point their prick upwards, so's all their spunk splashes over their expensive trousers and jackets. Total fucking mess. At least a £25 dry cleaning bill! The best part - and the part which helps me and Sharon go home happy, often wetting ourselves we're giggling so much - is how these guys explain the fresh semen stains all over their business suits to little wifey, waiting dutifully at the front door in her pinafore!