Here's something that will give the girls a titter.
This is an excerpt from Good Housekeeping May 13 1955. Tips for women preparing for their husband's return from work.
I've included my own 2006 version
1955: Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking.
2006: When you hear the car pull up, turn the daytime tv off, hides the half box of chocs and dive to the bathroom to splash water over your face. The flush to your cheeks will make him think you've been busy all day.
1955: Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide that.
2006: Be a LOT gay and inform him you've invited a bi female friend over for the night so he's got an hour to get his fat arse up to the shower and shave or he's not even seeing the action let alone joining in.
1955: At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise from the washing machine, dryer and vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet.
2006: Turn as many appliances on as you can so he thinks you've been rushed off your feet all day. Tell him to check the kids as they've been plugged into the playstation in their room since
1955: Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are a lot more important than yours.
2006: PRETEND you're listening to his drivel about his boring day, his equally boring workmates, nod occasionally then proceed to chatter about the gossip your best mate told you about someone he's never even heard of.
1955: Make the evening his. Never complain of he comes home late or goes out to dinner or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure.
2006: Spend the evening grilling him about where he's been when he's more than 30 minutes late, before you tell him his dinner is in the dog and you're off out to Bingo
1955: Arrange his cushion and offer to take his shoes off. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
2006: You're feeling hot and horny, he has no right to be tired. You want sex and you want it NOW ! Whisper sweet nothings in his ear as you unbutton his shirt or you'll be arranging his cushion over his face.
1955: Don't ask him questions about his actions. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfullness. You have no right to question him.
2006: Let him THINK he's the master of the house but you know better. You've been together long enough to wind him around your little finger and what you say goes or he's on a sex ban again
:giggle:
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A Woman's Place
Sex God
Well Sassy-Star - I reckon I prefer the 2006 version!!
I'd be deeply suspicious if I was met by the 1955 version!!
us poor men we get no respect these days :DQuote by Sassy-Seren
Well Sassy-Star - I reckon I prefer the 2006 version!!
I'd be deeply suspicious if I was met by the 1955 version!!
Bit Stepford Wives isn't it? :shock: Have you seen the booties on those stepford wives :shock:
Awwww please let me try them for a day or two... or three... four... ???
Quote by redpantherman
Well Sassy-Star - I reckon I prefer the 2006 version!!
I'd be deeply suspicious if I was met by the 1955 version!!
Bit Stepford Wives isn't it? :shock: Have you seen the booties on those stepford wives :shock:
Awwww please let me try them for a day or two... or three... four... ???
I'm finding my apron and sensible shoes as I type
Quote by Sassy-Seren
Well Sassy-Star - I reckon I prefer the 2006 version!!
I'd be deeply suspicious if I was met by the 1955 version!!
Bit Stepford Wives isn't it? :shock: Have you seen the booties on those stepford wives :shock:
Awwww please let me try them for a day or two... or three... four... ???
I'm finding my apron and sensible shoes as I type
As long as thats all your gonna wear....!!!I'll get my coat....
Master of Sex
I think we've missed the obvious for 2006 which is....
I get the kids, start the dinner, hoover the dogs and SHE comes in, EVENTUALLY, moaning about the traffic on the M4 and that her Ducati is leaking oil down her right leg.
:shock:
I get the kids, start the dinner, hoover the dogs and SHE comes in, EVENTUALLY, moaning about the traffic on the M4 and that her Ducati is leaking oil down her right leg.
:shock:
Quote by Kiss_Me
Brilliant Sass!
It reminds me of a Harry Enfield Sketch, done in black & white where a woman "had an opinion" :shock: at a dinner party!
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: I remember that too!
Grayson & Chumenly-Warner ??? (or similar)
Two of my fave harry Enfield characters
It's surprising how many of his characters remind me of people I know :lol:
Sex God
Quote by Sassy-Serenmmmm sounds like mrs north ,makes note to turn water off
2006: When you hear the car pull up, turn the daytime tv off, hides the half box of chocs and dive to the bathroom to splash water over your face. The flush to your cheeks will make him think you've been busy all day.
:giggle:
Quote by dambuster
Brilliant Sass!
It reminds me of a Harry Enfield Sketch, done in black & white where a woman "had an opinion" :shock: at a dinner party!
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: I remember that too!
Grayson & Chumenly-Warner ??? (or similar)
Two of my fave harry Enfield characters
I think so- but then again im a woman, and thinking for women-like having an opinion.....is dangerous!
Sex God
Back from holidays and can't believe this post!
Made me laugh so much!
Mainly because I've seen the article you're on about before, my maw found it once upon a time, and it has been a longstanding joke that every friday night she gets a ribbon in her hair to await my dads return home!
Classic!!!
:lol:
Made me laugh so much!
Mainly because I've seen the article you're on about before, my maw found it once upon a time, and it has been a longstanding joke that every friday night she gets a ribbon in her hair to await my dads return home!
Classic!!!
:lol: Quote by Sassy-Seren
1955: Don't ask him questions about his actions. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfullness. You have no right to question him.
2006: Let him THINK he's the master of the house but you know better. You've been together long enough to wind him around your little finger and what you say goes or he's on a sex ban again
:giggle:
1325: Remember he is the master of the house. Everything you own is his, you have no rights what so ever.
Things do improve with time don't they.
1065: you are equal partners, you have the right to own your own property and take it with you when you choose to leave.
.or do they.
