One of the things I find most liberating about the lifestyle is being able to be open about sexuality and desires.
I find it difficult to imagine going back to being in a relationship (of any description) where I could not be who I wanted to be sexually.
I thought it may be an interesting topic to think about past relationships or relationships that may have evolved and opened up new avenues of honesty. But then my thoughts started drifting again.
Is it less horrifying for a woman to tell a man she quite likes the idea of tasting another lady (and I also relate that thought to the recent threads about the numbers of bi women v’s straight men in couples) than it is for hubby to say “Do you know what my dear, I have always wondered what it would be like to have a cock spray my tonsils with a sticky hot load”
I know I am not alone in being a great fan of watching two guys suck each other silly, yet there are significant numbers guys who just don’t do it in front of their wives for whatever reason (usually because they don’t know). I very rarely come across women sneaking off to meet another lady (or may be they just do it much more discretely), yet you can find men all over the place nipping out for a bit of penis action without their wifey knowing. This is not all superstition by the way – I do talk to most of the guys I watch sucking cock. Admittedly it is usually after they have finished, as in most cases if they think a woman is around they go all straight and deny they are there for the willy action.
Why does it appear that more men keep their same sex activities secret from their partners than women do?
And then my thoughts turned to (no – not “oh it’s just another form of cheating”) but actually for once, just how pretty damn awful it must be to feel you have to hide it.
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I must admit, since being with dammie, it's great to be able to sit in front of the tv and be able to discuss a woman's pert nipples without worrying about the reaction.
I think in past vanilla relationships I've always had to hold something back. I learnt this in my late teens when my long term boyfriend asked me what my ultimate fantasy was. In my mind I supposed I just expected him to be feeling as horny as me. The reality was a look of shock & disgust on his face.
I can sympathise with men who feel they can't be themselves, but I'm also wondering, is it just about their partners reaction or are they uncomfortable with their own sexuality.
You Polo are a sexually liberated woman, who has openly stated that you enjoy watch male on male action, so if a man feels uncomfortable being bi in front of you, is it because he fears your reaction or because by doing it in front of other people he is acknowleging his own sexuality to himself
I think in past vanilla relationships I've always had to hold something back. I learnt this in my late teens when my long term boyfriend asked me what my ultimate fantasy was. In my mind I supposed I just expected him to be feeling as horny as me. The reality was a look of shock & disgust on his face.
I can sympathise with men who feel they can't be themselves, but I'm also wondering, is it just about their partners reaction or are they uncomfortable with their own sexuality.
You Polo are a sexually liberated woman, who has openly stated that you enjoy watch male on male action, so if a man feels uncomfortable being bi in front of you, is it because he fears your reaction or because by doing it in front of other people he is acknowleging his own sexuality to himself
Maybe society finds the thought of two women more acceptable? Maybe more men like to watch two women than women that like the idea of watching two men? Maybe it's to do with masculinity and men feeling like it's wrong?
All these 'maybes' but one thing I do know how painful it can be to feel like you have to hide your sexuality or face being disowned. Thankfully my fears were unfounded.
All these 'maybes' but one thing I do know how painful it can be to feel like you have to hide your sexuality or face being disowned. Thankfully my fears were unfounded.
oooh you are on form with your threads
although there shouldnt be, i think there is still a stigma attached to homosexuality which makes it more difficult for some to admit not sure if this is because its penetrative by the actual sexual organs where female on female isnt unless its fingers or toys. just my personal musings on the subject.
i agree it is a shame when people cant be honest and just be the person they are, personally i am more than happy to watch 2 blokes, 2 females or a mixture, i have no hang ups around any.
saying that as a married person i wouldnt have broached the subject of fem on fem with my husband, i can see the look of disdain on his face now just thinking about it. Being on the scene has made me more open and honest, but i still find it hard to ask for what i want, but thats just a personal thing.
Earthy xx
although there shouldnt be, i think there is still a stigma attached to homosexuality which makes it more difficult for some to admit not sure if this is because its penetrative by the actual sexual organs where female on female isnt unless its fingers or toys. just my personal musings on the subject.
i agree it is a shame when people cant be honest and just be the person they are, personally i am more than happy to watch 2 blokes, 2 females or a mixture, i have no hang ups around any.
saying that as a married person i wouldnt have broached the subject of fem on fem with my husband, i can see the look of disdain on his face now just thinking about it. Being on the scene has made me more open and honest, but i still find it hard to ask for what i want, but thats just a personal thing.
Earthy xx
ok , I think there`s a bit of the if my partner sees me sucking another mans willy , she will think me less a man.( that just being the hetrosexual mind set) . having done a bit of willy action in my younger years, the occassion has not arisen lately , so its something I would probably do if it was offered! 
Quote by Kiss
Maybe society finds the thought of two women more acceptable? Maybe more men like to watch two women than women that like the idea of watching two men? Maybe it's to do with masculinity and men feeling like it's wrong?
:thumbup:
I've just been thinking along very similar lines kiss.
Although homosexuality is more widely accepted in society nowadays, I think there is a big difference in how males and females are portrayed.
I'm thinking of tv & music videos showing "Lipstick lesbians".
When I think of gay males in the media I think the most prominant image is of "campness". Images of Julian Clary, Graham Norton spring to mind, but I'm struggling to think of a strong, manly, gay male in the media.
Maybe it's societies love of the "Camp, gay best friend" stereotype that makes "manly" men not want to admit their gay or bi side
Quote by HornyLittleBlonde
You Polo are a sexually liberated woman, who has openly stated that you enjoy watch male on male action, so if a man feels uncomfortable being bi in front of you, is it because he fears your reaction or because by doing it in front of other people he is acknowleging his own sexuality to himself
Good question :thumbup:
And from my observations to date - my answer is 'both'.
I have seen the guys who run a mile when they know a woman is there and also guys who are relieved when you don't freak-out. Guys who have point blank denied what they have just done (even if you do tell them it was great to watch) and guys who explain they just didn't realise women would like watching.
Quote by Kiss
Maybe society finds the thought of two women more acceptable? Maybe more men like to watch two women than women that like the idea of watching two men? Maybe it's to do with masculinity and men feeling like it's wrong?
.
Nail on the head there babes :thumbup:
I was talking about this with a male friend and he admitted to being what I called 'bi-orally curious', meaning he's had thoughts about trying oral sex with a another man but not full sex then followed that by saying 'I'm not gay you know' I think this is the fear that some men may have if they admit to being turned on by the thought of sex with another guy whereas two girls getting it on is one of the top male fantasies and doesn't question his own sexuality in the least but quite the reverse.
I found I became much more sexually open during my last marriage but it helped that my ex was so broad minded, nothing short of the illegal stuff would have shocked him. His acceptance of it all allowed me to be able to experiment sexually even though I didn't explore my bi-sexuality until after I became single again.
Just another thought.
I know a guy who has recieve orally and shagged another guy anally, but has never given oral or let another guy penetrate him.
He says he just selfish and a shags a shag. Very much a "every hole's a goal" attitude.
Now I',m wondering, do some men go down this route when they've been on the site for a while and they're not getting any female meets, or is this just another way to deny their true sexuality
I know a guy who has recieve orally and shagged another guy anally, but has never given oral or let another guy penetrate him.
He says he just selfish and a shags a shag. Very much a "every hole's a goal" attitude.
Now I',m wondering, do some men go down this route when they've been on the site for a while and they're not getting any female meets, or is this just another way to deny their true sexuality
Someone once said to me that they thought every person had a certain degree of "bi curiosity" about themselves, some would admit it and try, others would totally deny it.
In my marriage I am the most sexually liberated I have ever felt in my entire sexual life. My previous marriage I wasn't allowed to even masturbate in front of him let alone bring a vibrator into the house. This time, I can be myself when I want and how I want. Equally, if my husband was to come out and say he had a bi tendency I would be surprised as he has always been straight but not shocked as we are very open and honest.
It wouldn't bother me seeing two gay men together, my husband wouldn't enjoy seeing that so I wouldn't put him in that position.
In my marriage I am the most sexually liberated I have ever felt in my entire sexual life. My previous marriage I wasn't allowed to even masturbate in front of him let alone bring a vibrator into the house. This time, I can be myself when I want and how I want. Equally, if my husband was to come out and say he had a bi tendency I would be surprised as he has always been straight but not shocked as we are very open and honest.
It wouldn't bother me seeing two gay men together, my husband wouldn't enjoy seeing that so I wouldn't put him in that position.
Quote by HornyLittleBlonde
Just another thought.
I know a guy who has recieve orally and shagged another guy anally, but has never given oral or let another guy penetrate him.
He says he just selfish and a shags a shag. Very much a "every hole's a goal" attitude.
Now I',m wondering, do some men go down this route when they've been on the site for a while and they're not getting any female meets, or is this just another way to deny their true sexuality
Who is on form with the questions today
I don't think it is just on this site (for those it relates to) - it is certainly the case with a number of doggers....
Male #1 "10pm and still no couples?"
Male #2 "Do you want me to wank you?"
Male #1 "No, I am here for the couples"
Male #1 "Still no couples around I see and it's nearly 11pm""
Male #2 "I could suck you off if you want"
Male #1 "No thanks I am here for the couples"
Male #2 "Well that's me done for the night, I'll be off now"
Male #1 "OK, well may be a quick suck before you go"
But not all males who hide their sexuality from their partners are Male #1 - there are plenty of Male #2's out there who want to be the 'any hole'.
Its almost certainly down to masculinity IMHO.
A lot of guys have an attitude (and yes, I stole this from a T-shirt!) of "I agree with lesbianism, so long as both birds are fit." And lets face it, watching two women is probably in the top 3 of the men's fantasies top 100. I believe that bisexuality seems almost fashionable among young women at the moment!
Guys have a much tougher time of it. From birth, they are bombarded with the message that it would make them less of a man.
As has already been said, cheating is cheating but I feel desperately sorry for bi guys in a relationship where they have to hide their feelings.
A lot of guys have an attitude (and yes, I stole this from a T-shirt!) of "I agree with lesbianism, so long as both birds are fit." And lets face it, watching two women is probably in the top 3 of the men's fantasies top 100. I believe that bisexuality seems almost fashionable among young women at the moment!
Guys have a much tougher time of it. From birth, they are bombarded with the message that it would make them less of a man.
As has already been said, cheating is cheating but I feel desperately sorry for bi guys in a relationship where they have to hide their feelings.
Sex God
Quote by winchwench
I believe that bisexuality seems almost fashionable among young women at the moment!
Is this because society as a whole is becoming more accepting of different sexual preferences possibly. I don't think anyone is entirely straight or gay, more that everyone one is somewhere along the scale. Yes it does seem that it is more acceptable for a woman to be bisexaul than a man and it's awful that some men feel that they need to hide their sexual preference away from there partner, friends or family for what ever reason.
Something I read yrs ago re men in denial of latent gayness:-
Some men prefer sex with a shemale because they can kid themselves they arnt gay cos "she" wore makeup or cos she "looked" female.
Every time I go into a gay bar or club, I look at the "normal" or "Straight" looking guys and try to imagain seeing them on a building site somewhere, but cos i know they are gay, I just cant picture it.
Having said that, I cannot picture seeing the camp ones anywhere outside clubland.
I used to work with real butch type guy who was gay curious, yet no one at work ever suspected his fantasies
Some men prefer sex with a shemale because they can kid themselves they arnt gay cos "she" wore makeup or cos she "looked" female.
Every time I go into a gay bar or club, I look at the "normal" or "Straight" looking guys and try to imagain seeing them on a building site somewhere, but cos i know they are gay, I just cant picture it.
Having said that, I cannot picture seeing the camp ones anywhere outside clubland.
I used to work with real butch type guy who was gay curious, yet no one at work ever suspected his fantasies
Quote by winchwench
Just wanted to add that I saw this in an ad a while back.
"Straight guy-but happy to be fucked/give oral to another guy & swallow his cum so long as he understands that I AM STRAIGHT" :shock:
D'ya reckon he could have been swimming in that river in Egypt perchance?
I know what you mean - but something a good friend asked me today (so I am gonna nick it) ....
How much of it is about sexuality and how much is just about being dirty or wanting to be dirty, feel dirty, get 'that' buzz?
I have always been very upfront at the start of any relationship that I am bi and will not change that ever since I first came to terms with my bisexuality properly.
Before I could admit that - actuallly - I am a sexual being who likes both genders almost equally (with a slight bias towards men - I just fancy the more) I was gay then straight then gay then straight - based solely on the gender of my partner.
So I struggled and felt guilt and stuff - every time I had a boyfriend I wanted a girl and vice versa - until i finally took a step back and told myself, 'You know what - you need to relax with who you are' - and i did just that and it was a liberating experience.
I could not imagine now not telling a partner from the get-go that i don't swing both ways out of confusion or indecisiveness, I swing both ways out of the fact I am definitely a bisexual and I hide nothing. Sure, that's put off people of both genders, but if someone cannot handle that aspect of me then I am probably not the right person for them.
Before I could admit that - actuallly - I am a sexual being who likes both genders almost equally (with a slight bias towards men - I just fancy the more) I was gay then straight then gay then straight - based solely on the gender of my partner.
So I struggled and felt guilt and stuff - every time I had a boyfriend I wanted a girl and vice versa - until i finally took a step back and told myself, 'You know what - you need to relax with who you are' - and i did just that and it was a liberating experience.
I could not imagine now not telling a partner from the get-go that i don't swing both ways out of confusion or indecisiveness, I swing both ways out of the fact I am definitely a bisexual and I hide nothing. Sure, that's put off people of both genders, but if someone cannot handle that aspect of me then I am probably not the right person for them.
Quote by PoloLady
Just wanted to add that I saw this in an ad a while back.
"Straight guy-but happy to be fucked/give oral to another guy & swallow his cum so long as he understands that I AM STRAIGHT" :shock:
D'ya reckon he could have been swimming in that river in Egypt perchance?
I know what you mean - but something a good friend asked me today (so I am gonna nick it) ....
How much of it is about sexuality and how much is just about being dirty or wanting to be dirty, feel dirty, get 'that' buzz?
:thumbup:
I can't help but think too that we are so over exposed to so much sex- and it's getting more & more hardcore & "deviant"- that we need to keep pushing our boundries in order to get that ever more elusive buzz.
Quote by winchwench
Just wanted to add that I saw this in an ad a while back.
"Straight guy-but happy to be fucked/give oral to another guy & swallow his cum so long as he understands that I AM STRAIGHT" :shock:
D'ya reckon he could have been swimming in that river in Egypt perchance?
I know what you mean - but something a good friend asked me today (so I am gonna nick it) ....
How much of it is about sexuality and how much is just about being dirty or wanting to be dirty, feel dirty, get 'that' buzz?
:thumbup:
I can't help but think too that we are so over exposed to so much sex- and it's getting more & more hardcore & "deviant"- that we need to keep pushing our boundries in order to get that ever more elusive buzz.
spot on I think we are more and more exposed to sex and more and more homsexual sex on telly now that it shuttles about in our heads and leads us to think about trying it ourselfs
Since we've been active on here over the last few weeks our already open views on sexuality have broadened even more.
Speaking for myself (i'll let curvy speak for herself if she chooses), I have always been slightly curious about my having a bi-side and this has increased to yes I would like to experiment and see what happens with another man who also wanted the experience.
We have been chatting to a guy and I have realised I am definitely interested, and so is curvy in watching it. In fact the scenario now actively turns her on whereas before she hadn't even considered it.
I think I am still mainly hetero in that given the straight (ironic choice if word maybe
) choice between a guy and a gal I would still go for the lady - they have so much more to play with . But when the opportunity arises I now know I will go with the flow and just enjoy what happens.
Being on this site and chatting just changes you, well it has us. Sex is a physical (mainly, not denying the emotional side totally) sensation and does it really matter who is involved with the pleasure as long as you 'click' in the first place.
just my thoughts
tc
h
Ooh, just noticed, our hundredth post, small milestone, 1000 next stop
Speaking for myself (i'll let curvy speak for herself if she chooses), I have always been slightly curious about my having a bi-side and this has increased to yes I would like to experiment and see what happens with another man who also wanted the experience.
We have been chatting to a guy and I have realised I am definitely interested, and so is curvy in watching it. In fact the scenario now actively turns her on whereas before she hadn't even considered it.
I think I am still mainly hetero in that given the straight (ironic choice if word maybe
) choice between a guy and a gal I would still go for the lady - they have so much more to play with . But when the opportunity arises I now know I will go with the flow and just enjoy what happens.Being on this site and chatting just changes you, well it has us. Sex is a physical (mainly, not denying the emotional side totally) sensation and does it really matter who is involved with the pleasure as long as you 'click' in the first place.
just my thoughts
tc
h
Ooh, just noticed, our hundredth post, small milestone, 1000 next stop
Quote by hornyncurvy
Since we've been active on here over the last few weeks our already open views on sexuality have broadened even more.
Speaking for myself (i'll let curvy speak for herself if she chooses), I have always been slightly curious about my having a bi-side and this has increased to yes I would like to experiment and see what happens with another man who also wanted the experience.
We have been chatting to a guy and I have realised I am definitely interested, and so is curvy in watching it. In fact the scenario now actively turns her on whereas before she hadn't even considered it.
I think I am still mainly hetero in that given the straight (ironic choice if word maybe
Being on this site and chatting just changes you, well it has us. Sex is a physical (mainly, not denying the emotional side totally) sensation and does it really matter who is involved with the pleasure as long as you 'click' in the first place.
just my thoughts
tc
h
Ooh, just noticed, our hundredth post, small milestone, 1000 next stop
seems I`m agreeing again but , yeah I would to and yes if it was a toss up ( pardon the pun) between man or woman I would plumb for the woman
incidentally congrats on almost reaching 100........unfortunately no telgrams I`m afraid
hey I`m almost at 200 :D
:thumbup: :lol: Quote by PoloLady
One of the things I find most liberating about the lifestyle is being able to be open about sexuality and desires.
I find it difficult to imagine going back to being in a relationship (of any description) where I could not be who I wanted to be sexually.
I thought it may be an interesting topic to think about past relationships or relationships that may have evolved and opened up new avenues of honesty. But then my thoughts started drifting again.
Is just sexuality and desires ?????
But before I do . . . . . .
I can remember getting quite excited when a previous "Mk" became even more excited as I kissed her as I put Mr PotatoHead in the pussy immediately after licking her. She sucked and licked her juice and taste from my lips like a demented perv. It blew my mind and it remains one of my favourite things to do/be part of. But . . . . . . .
When I tried verbally to explore this - she was absolutely horrified that I thought it was erotic, or indeed at the suggestion she might like to taste another girl. Although - to be fair, I was still in my mid 20s so that would put her about 19/20/21 ish so I was nowhere near being the person I am today
"Is just sexuality and desires ?????"
One thing I've found to be true - for me at least, is that since sort of 'committing' to "this lifestyle" and the people in it - I've for the first time in my life felt truly happy to "be myself" - in most aspects of my life.
I've told you lot more about "me" than some of my wives have known :shock:
We all have a past and a history. Some of it we talk about freely. Some of it with only a handful of people, other with only a select few.
Some of my own is private. Some of it almost "secret" - I've even had to 'check myself' because I've been in conversation with people and realised that I'm talking about things that I haven't mentioned out loud for years and years :shock:
You people, and the lifestyle have made me much more relaxed about myself and in general over the past 2 years or so than I have been in many.
So for me, it's not just about sexuality and desires.
Thank you.
*Disclaimer
Of course - a huge amount of credit for my present "state of mind" needs to go to HLB
Sex God
Quote by HornyLittleBlonde
I must admit, since being with dammie, it's great to be able to sit in front of the tv and be able to discuss a woman's pert nipples without worrying about the reaction.
:
:thumbup: even when we go out we discuss who the nice females are openly.
I have to whisper to His if we are out with vanilla friends
Sex God
I must admit, since being with dammie, it's great to be able to sit in front of the tv and be able to discuss a woman's pert nipples without worrying about the reaction.
:
:thumbup: even when we go out we discuss who the nice females are openly.
I have to whisper to His if we are out with vanilla friends
Absolutely hisandhers, we do the same, talk openly about who (male and female) we like and who we think each other would like...our question is always "Would you?"
pink x
Sex God
Quote by dambuster
...our question is always "Would you?"
pink x
Aah - the "Wudya ?" game :grin:
a brill game when you are out it town on our own
Sex God
Ive found with a couple of straight friends of mine that they just dont understand what bi-sexual means. They seem to think that people who are bi are confused about who they are and just dont want to admit that they are gay, which is of course not true in most cases. For some reason they always ask me if i think someone looks like they might be gay, for some reason i can usually identify them correctly (gaydar?!) but when i say no they say something tht always makes me laugh "Are they a bit bi then?" You cant tell by looking at someone whether or not they are bi (i suppose you may be able to in some cases)there does seem to be a bit of confusion amoung some straight people about the whole issue. I'm repeating myself but you get the general idea of what i mean...i hope.
