The other day I was cruising along as usual in my BMW coming onto one of my motorways, which was very busy with inferior cars.
First off, I couldn't believe that the volume of traffic DIDN'T slow down for me AT ALL as I came off the slip road! I had to squeeze into a barely big enough gap between two cars in order to get onto my motorway! (The driver of the car behind me did realise his mistake though and honked an apology to me with a long blast of his horn.)
Unbelievably, I had to do the same again before I could get to the BMW lane. (Why do underlings use this lane? Surely everyone knows it is for BMW drivers only?)
Anyway, once I was in the BMW lane and posing along at 110mph enjoying the adulation that the inferior car drivers were giving me, I noticed an inferior car ahead of me which was not only in the BMW lane of my motorway, but was driving at a ridiculous 70 mph!
Naturally, I got to within a foot or so of his rear bumper and flashed my headlights to remind him he shouldn't be in the BMW lane of my motorway and to get out of my way.
Of course, once he realised it was a BMW behind him, he did just that, but I could hardly believe it when he pulled straight back out behind me! He also tried to keep up with me and when he realised I would out-run him, he put on some blue lights in his front grill and urged me to get onto the hard shoulder so that he could congratulate me on my excellent car.
Needless to say, I was eager oblige and when we had stopped, the man gave me a piece of paper confirming what I already knew - that my car goes fast! Apparently he wants everyone to know what a superior car I have, so I had to take my driver's licence to a Police Station to be sent away to have some points put on! (They're not free points either - they're ?20 each and I was only allowed 3.) But the man at the Police Station said that because I drive a BMW, it won't be much longer before I earn the full 12 points, and then I won't even NEED a driving licence, so they will take it off me! See, now THAT's the sort of respect you get when you buy and drive a BMW.
Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login
BMW Drivers
last reply
42 replies
1.6k views
1 watcher
0 likes
Sex God
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: 
Orgasminator
That just goes to show what i believed.... BMW stands for Bloody More W*nkers
lmao
lmao
Like my Mitsu L200 Warrior 
Sex God
omg is this car wars now or what? 
I cant believe it!!!!
Everyone know that the only cars that should be given way to ar those of us with 4x4's!!!
We are higher up than BM's ( except fot the 4x 4 version of course and they are included with us) and therefor need to be given more respect.
Lets face it the only people that drive BMW's are drug dealers anyway!!1
Everyone know that the only cars that should be given way to ar those of us with 4x4's!!!
We are higher up than BM's ( except fot the 4x 4 version of course and they are included with us) and therefor need to be given more respect.
Lets face it the only people that drive BMW's are drug dealers anyway!!1
Sex God
MrFC really does drive a BMW
not for much longer he doesn't if he keeps driving it at 110mph!!
Orgasminator
Quote by WilmaFlintstone
That just goes to show what i believed.... BMW stands for Bloody More W*nkers
lmao
Steady there Morbius.....steady!!!
lol - MrFC really does drive a BMW
Love
Wilma
x x x x
Yeah and my comment was aimed at the driver of the inferior car that stopped him enjoying his BMW on his motorway.
Think i got away with that???? lol
Quote by foxylady 123
I cant believe it!!!!
Everyone know that the only cars that should be given way to ar those of us with 4x4's!!!
We are higher up than BM's ( except fot the 4x 4 version of course and they are included with us) and therefor need to be given more respect.
Lets face it the only people that drive BMW's are drug dealers anyway!!1
4x4s are so high they make me nervous when they overtake me.
Now - where the sarky git emoticon
Orgasminator
Quote by WilmaFlintstone
Think i got away with that???? lol
Oh no you didn't!!
Love
Wilma
x x x x
WooooHoooooo another botty spank
While ive been at the hospital with Caz, Calista has been tarting it bagging snogs at the munch on Saturday and i have nothing...... at least now i have two ladies paying my boty some attention..... woooppie. :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:
Orgasminator
Quote by WilmaFlintstone
My botty needs attention too!
Love
Wilma
x x x x
Want me to ask the sexy nurses at the hospital for some antiseptic cream for you?? :rose:
Orgasminator
Quote by WilmaFlintstone
Be afraid, be very afraid.
Love
Wilma
x x x x
Morbius just bring me back a nurse
Have already ofered to keep a couple of them occupied during their quiet, long, boring nightshift :twisted:
Sex God
BMW's my arse!
come back when you've got a proper car, like a merc or an aston or summat, or even a 911 at a push, then watch 'em climb inside yer boot and scare the shit outta yas!
n x x x :P
come back when you've got a proper car, like a merc or an aston or summat, or even a 911 at a push, then watch 'em climb inside yer boot and scare the shit outta yas!
n x x x :P
Sex God
Quote by neilinleeds
BMW's my arse!
come back when you've got a proper car, like a merc or an aston or summat, or even a 911 at a push, then watch 'em climb inside yer boot and scare the shit outta yas!
n x x x :P
OOooo Neil, now thats a REAL car, id love an Aston Martin DB7, my dream car but can only afford one if i sell my house
Orgasminator
Quote by GenHertsCpl
BMW's my arse!
come back when you've got a proper car, like a merc or an aston or summat, or even a 911 at a push, then watch 'em climb inside yer boot and scare the shit outta yas!
n x x x :P
OOooo Neil, now thats a REAL car, id love an Aston Martin DB7, my dream car but can only afford one if i sell my house
Nahhhh, gotta be the DB9, the DB7 is a reworked Jag and the V12 engine is basically 2 Ford V6s stuck together lol
Sex God
Quote by Lucifer
The last time YOU climbed into a boot scared me neil :shock:
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: very funny! now piss off! :rotflmao:
nice one mate! :lol2:
n x x x x ;)
Quote by morbiusUK
Nahhhh, gotta be the DB9, the DB7 is a reworked Jag and the V12 engine is basically 2 Ford V6s stuck together lol
The DB7's a reworked 40/41, the DB9's got two Mundaneo engines under the bonnet - can't win really !!
And yes, I'd take either, any day of the week. Dear Santa...
