Damn it - I need a man | Swinging Heaven

25 Oct 2004

Well I'm not going onto your rota, ho no not me.
I am very professonal when it comes to changeing duvets.
It has taken some time to learn to do it correctly.
I now charge for my services. HR after my name me.
I once changed the duvet for one of the Queens collies.
Had to go on three week course to learn that.
So if it's professional duvet changeing you want, contact me at BP.
(thats not buckingham palace, it's the service station down the road)

25 Oct 2004

One of my ex wives and I had a mouse in our duvet once. I've never heard a woman scream like that, either before or since, but the cat sorted the problem in no time at all !! :shock: :shock:
:twisted: :twisted:

25 Oct 2004

Quote by skegnessswingers
Maybe you could get one of those blow-up men? I hear they are all tha rage.....

I'm on the blown-up men rota. Me?? Predictable??

25 Oct 2004

Quote by westerross
Maybe you could get one of those blow-up men? I hear they are all tha rage.....

I'm on the blown-up men rota. Me?? Predictable??
No no, you're not on the inflatables rota, you're on the safety pin rota! kiss

25 Oct 2004

Quote by t&t
Maybe you could get one of those blow-up men? I hear they are all tha rage.....

I'm on the blown-up men rota. Me?? Predictable??
No no, you're not on the inflatables rota, you're on the safety pin rota! kiss

You come near me with that pin and I'll....... and I'll........
....blow in your ear.

25 Oct 2004

Quote by Ice Pie
Relatively newly single . :bounce: ......... basking in my independence........
And what's the one thing I can't flippin do on my own?????
Change the bloody duvet cover - that's what ops: :oops:

Do you know the inside out trick?
Tried that but somehow I end up inside and the duvet out???!!! rolleyes

:oops: :oops:
You mean that's not what's meant to happen? :shock:
I usually grasp the end in both hands and dangle it over the bannisters. If I give it a good shake then the cover usually slides over all the way. All that's needed then is to push the ends into the corners and the jobs done... wink

25 Oct 2004

Look here!! lol

:lol:
A mouse nearly caused my first "Ex" to have heart failure and now there's a bloody Hamster trying to crawl into the duvet!!
dunno

25 Oct 2004

Quote by Eagerslut9
Look here!! :lol:
A mouse nearly caused my first "Ex" to have heart failure and now there's a bloody Hamster trying to crawl into the duvet!!

Best way to get a Hamster out of a Duvet... Kentucky Fried Chicken... specifically the Zinger Tower Burger... Mmmmm

26 Oct 2004

Quote by DaHamsta
I usually grasp the end in both hands and dangle it over the bannisters. If I give it a good shake then the cover usually slides over all the way.

Very interesting, but what about the duvet?

26 Oct 2004

Quote by JudyTV
It sticks better if you do it in four different places with a few inches between each piece. If you want to be really cute do both sides :wink: :P.
Judy ................ Blue Peter girl, lives alone.

Oooh, no missus, titter ye not!