From a single fem to a single fem...
What ever you do, you do it in your own time!!!!
I have been here almost 3 yrs now and i still find it hard. Instead of arranging to meet somebody for a nite and finding you are not attracted or not your type, why not try just a coffee in the day time in town?
Everybody does things diffrently. You are in control of yourself and keep it that way, don't ever do anything becasue you feel you have to.
Furby, there you go you have some great answers from other's already and your own post is exceptionally well thought out anyway.
You are not anybody's plaything, you are captain of your own ship.
Saying no is a very diginified and honest thing to do and should be respected as such.
Saying yes make's wonderful things possible and if they happen and go well for all involved then it can be smiles all round, not because anyone felt they had to but because it was good and right for you and for them.
do you know what
I LOVVVVVVVVE THIS SITE!!!!!!!! everyone is so nice.. and kind and give such good advice.. i shall take it all on board.. i felt silly asking a room.. got pounced on.. 'ohhh furby il help ya come here little girl' type thing... shudder creeepy ohhhhh...
so im pleased i posted.. thankyou xxxxxxxxxxxx
As a mere man, may I say that not all of us are looking for a quick wham, bang, thank you ma'am at the earliest opportunity. Even some of us males can be a little reserved when it comes to meeting someone new for the first time. For myself, I'm perfectly happy to meet for coffee with no commitment. Making that first contact is often the most difficult and, to be honest, I am never really sure how to open up a conversation in chat for example.
I think most of the answers apply to the first part of your message. Its nice to get supportive and approving replies.
The second part of your posting seems to show someone who is quite actively delving into the wonderful world of swinging, and by most standards not doing too badly. Experiencing the fab fucks comes with the overheads of the experiencing the failures and its probably about the same for most people who are arranging meets through adverts.
So it comes across as someone who is willing to have a go, but would like to know how to get oneself out of 'trouble' ? Or avoid it in the first place ?
As suggested you may thrive in a club atmosphere, where you can meet people without having to make an arrangement. You may also find yourself recommended. That way you will be become more adept at making the right choices.
You've had good advice furby here. I am on this site because it means I can talk to the people who are honest about their love of sex and haven't really had a lot of intimate encounters out of it. I always suggest that people meet me first in a neutral environment so they, especially the woman, can sum me up and if it only means a chat and nothing more then no matter, it has still been fun. I hesitate to suggest that a fuck buddy would be a good idea in case hundreds of men put themselves forward for the pleasure. Whatever happens, good luck, take care and have fun
Take your time if it doesn't feel right then don't do it.I understand how you feel there's no rush!!!Cham's is a great place,
i've been doing this for years now and i still find it so hard to say no thanx face to face, i meet as a single women and some men do see you as a easy target cause you havnt got 'anyone to look after you' my advice is always make sure the men you meet know that you only ever meet socially first time tell them even if you get on its only socially, cause if you do the 'if theres a spark we could play' thing your back to square one when they say......well do you fancy it or what lol personally i find it so much easier to tell someone they not for me on msn than to their face and yes some guy do get funny even a bit nasty about it when you turn them donen so theres another reason for telling them on messenger.
ello furbs ......
well here's my 5 peneth for what its worth .... end of the day when all thats done is done .... agreeing to a meet someone is not agreeing to have sex with them. If, like when your dating you get on and fancy it, then go for it if not then dont ..... you are here for your own reasons and should not be pressured into doing something your not comfortable doing ....... so either as suggested just meet for a social drink .... or just be honest and tell whoever that your not going to play in any event , but will meet them to get to know them ..... that way nothing is expected and no-one can say you were anything but honest from the outset ..... we've all been where you are to start with .... best advice i can give you from my own eperience is this ...... be as honest as you can , tell people eactly what you want and expect, then select who seems the best option for you ..... but never do it for someone elses sake , that way you end up feeling like shit and thats not why your here !!!!!
ok .... off me soap box .... good luck hun , have fun xxxxxxxxxx
im not sure about every 1 else but i find it hard
to find time to meet as of my job but i do make meets / socilas as often as posss
and i enjoy the advise i get from this site as ive been on here over a year or so now
and made lots of great friends xx
I guess I'm lucky because I love meeting new people and only occasionally "get the jitters". So far I have met quite a fair number of people on this site, mostly at socials, and a few through meets I have set up. Out of those, a lot have resulted in friendship, and I am still in friendly touch with lots of new friends. Only a very small number have progressed into something more than that, so Furby's one out of four seems pretty good going.
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