Hardened Swingers

26 Nov 2010

Quote by Perrie_n_dave
It's completely obvious to me what a hardened swinger is ...
it's a person or couple who has a lot of experience, and has done the full swap thing etc. At least from our perspective we always say we're NOT hardened swingers because we don't do full swaps etc. It's nothing to be ashamed of being called.

Ummmm . . . .sorry, but no. You're using sexual activities to define hardened, a pretty meaningless concept at the best of times, but assuming there is such a thing IMO it's not about the kinds of activity indulged in, but the approach to them. The difference I think would be one of mindset and attitude.
Relatively speaking, Gem and I could be said to have a fair amount of experience as both a couple and singles, inasmuch as we've done the soft swing stuff, the full swap stuff, the social thing, the club thing, the house party thing, done meets arranged on the internet, been straightish sometimes, been rampantly bisexual at other times, but I wouldn't say at all that that necessarily makes us hardened, or that we're hardened to it. In fact, having been here between us the best part of 6 or 7 years, we are still as nervous about the prospect of a trip to a club this weekend as we ever were. rolleyes

Hardened to it we are not! lol

If we were to become hardened to the point where we no longer had the butterflies and it was just thing to do of a weekend we would probably stop as there would no longer be much point to the whole thing, for us at least.
N x x x ;)

27 Nov 2010

I know people don't like labels or boxes, but it is something we all do everyday. It helps us simplify matters in life and is useful in many situations.
So we are soft swingers, now that category is a broad church, from those who only watch others, to those who don't mind a bit of touching and may on occasion slip into full swap, but only on rare occasions.
So categories are not perfect, but at least it gives people a clue about your preferances in 2 words without having to write a full essay on your limitations and preferances and means that you can connect with people more easily.
Same as no single guys group. It may be on occasion the odd single good lucking polite guy maybe considered, but it's not something you want to be chased on.
Hardened swingers I suppose I would put in my own head as being experienced swingers, who are open to most aspects of swinging. ie they ain't gonna blush when you touch each other and will not be shy in expressing that they want to fuck your wife or hubby etc.
I would not say it means they have lost the exitement but they have got over the nervousness that they had when they started.
Catergories are broad and not precise, but imagine a world without them. Every choice and I mean every choice would be long and drawn out.
For example every job is different ie admin assistant, but if jobs did not categories, then you would not be able to sift out those of no obvious interest or relation to you and would have to read all job descriptions in depth. It just speeds up life , it's not about putting you in a fixed box.

27 Nov 2010

over the years i have occasionally seen adverts where people declare themselves to be hardened swingers. which gives off the expectation to the worthy and equally an effective use for timewaster screening.