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Would you self combust......

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If you were never allowed to have sex or do anything sexual again,how long would it take you to self combust????
I think it would take me a couple of weeks,i had to go 3 weeks when our first child was born but i got some attention during that time,but to be completely without anything sexual would be complete hell and i'd either commit genocide or blow up.
If ANYTHING included wanking I'd say about 24 hours...... 48 hours if I keep myself really busy by watching UK Gold redface surprisedops: :oops:
Quote by bluexxx
If ANYTHING included wanking I'd say about 24 hours...... 48 hours if I keep myself really busy by watching UK Gold redface surprisedops: :oops:

Anything means absolutely everything,nothing sexual whatsoever.
Bloody UK GOLD rolleyes
I could last about a week, but then I'd have to 'take matters in hand...' wink
It's not really something I like to think about, to be honest! :shock:
Given an unlimited supply of single malt whisky I could last forever...
Well till my liver gave out anyway lol
Quote by Steve_Lincs
If you were never allowed to have sex or do anything sexual again,how long would it take you to self combust????

About a week I reckon, if masturbation counts.
If it doesn't count, then I really have no idea. My record is a self-imposed and recently terminated abstinence of 18 months, during which time I may or may not have gone insane as a result. biggrin
About a week I reckon! But I'm not going to try and see....
redface
Maybe just over a week
Other half has been away for 3 weeks and I've been pretty good, too good in fact :cry:
if masturbation was out then i'd probably last 3 days maximum!!!!!
After that i'd probably just kill myself anyway!!!
Quote by Clare_Lincs
if masturbation was out then i'd probably last 3 days maximum!!!!!
After that i'd probably just kill myself anyway!!!

What you mean to tell me you masturbate :shock: :shock: :shock:
Family been ill, so I gone well over a week now, if you see a patch of soot on my seat then you know how long I could go...
Quote by Steve_Lincs
if masturbation was out then i'd probably last 3 days maximum!!!!!
After that i'd probably just kill myself anyway!!!

What you mean to tell me you masturbate :shock: :shock: :shock:
More than you'll ever know darling!! lol :lol: :lol: wink
What happens if you went for a nice bus ride? The vibrations just do it for me cool So if I had to abstain from anything sexual forever, it would take about 3 days before a bus ride would cause actual orgasm :shock:
Would that count? dunno After all, it wouldn't be my fault, I would just be sat there innocently, would be the bus makers fault 8-)
And also, what if I just drove backwards and forwards over a cattlegrid? Same thing, but not my fault again - cattlegrid makers fault 8-)
Misschief,buses and cattlegrids would be banned,no one could use them,so no you couldnt get an orgasm off machines too biggrin :D lol
You lot are all sick. You should have more bromide in your drinks and read more. Sins of the flesh are the making of the devil..... redface
Quote by MISSCHIEF
What happens if you went for a nice bus ride? The vibrations just do it for me cool So if I had to abstain from anything sexual forever, it would take about 3 days before a bus ride would cause actual orgasm :shock:
Would that count? dunno After all, it wouldn't be my fault, I would just be sat there innocently, would be the bus makers fault 8-)
And also, what if I just drove backwards and forwards over a cattlegrid? Same thing, but not my fault again - cattlegrid makers fault 8-)

:laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove:
Thought I might go for a drive in the country this evening. I've removed the shock absorbers and flat-spotted all the tyres. Pick you up about ;)
Quote by MISSCHIEF
What happens if you went for a nice bus ride? The vibrations just do it for me cool

You really need to come on the back of my Harley, Misschief....... wink :wink:
Quote by Ice Pie
I've removed the shock absorbers and flat-spotted all the tyres. Pick you up about ;)

Ice I don't want my teeth to rattle out!!! :lol2:
Frogster, if I 'come' on the back of your Harley, I would probably fall off cos not concentrating! :shock: :shock: :shock:
cool
Quote by Steve_Lincs
Misschief,buses and cattlegrids would be banned,no one could use them,so no you couldnt get an orgasm off machines too biggrin :D lol

Damn, no buses or cattlegrids confused
What about my 'funny fitting' trousers? cool 8-) 8-) Not my fault they made em funny fitting :smile2:
Quote by MISSCHIEF
What happens if you went for a nice bus ride? The vibrations just do it for me cool So if I had to abstain from anything sexual forever, it would take about 3 days before a bus ride would cause actual orgasm :shock:

You've never been on the single deck number 22 from the Old Pond to the High Street have you?......third row on the drivers side?....64p one way?
If you have then you owe me For the dry cleaning on my suit trousers!
Quote by Steve_Lincs
If you were never allowed to have sex or do anything sexual again,how long would it take you to self combust????.

Have gone three weeks total abstinence and didn`t even get a wet dream for it
(Enforced, staying in digs with big hairy arsed builders)
Have I just managed to do my first other person quote on a post.
I think i have biggrin
Can't imagine lasting longer than a week.
He managed for 2 weeks because of an operation in that region! and she couldn't manage more than a week. Bloody stress of not getting it is so intense, don't you all think?
:kick: smackbottom whip poke banghead
Quote by MISSCHIEF
Misschief,buses and cattlegrids would be banned,no one could use them,so no you couldnt get an orgasm off machines too biggrin :D lol

Damn, no buses or cattlegrids confused
What about my 'funny fitting' trousers? cool 8-) 8-) Not my fault they made em funny fitting :smile2:
He didn't mention hoovers, the old uprights with the handle in just the right place (so I have been told redface ) Quick grab one before they added to the list....
I can go a while .......... fingers usually get the better of me though :shock:
I once went almost 18 months .... whilst in a relationship ... even conceived a child during that time and truely there was never any penetrative sex :shock: I don't claim immaculate conception either
:angel:
Quote by frogster
You really need to come on the back of my Harley, Misschief....... wink :wink:

Or she could buy one of her own, like i did. rolleyes
Back to the point... I know I have a problem keeping my hands off myself at any time (I know, It'll never heal up if I keep picking at it) R quite often says "You toying with yourself again?"
Or, more recently, when seeing to a zit under his nose for him, he says "You have been toying with yourself again!"
So I am guessing combustion within 24 hrs.
Quote by Vix
You really need to come on the back of my Harley, Misschief....... wink :wink:

Or she could buy one of her own, like i did. rolleyes

Sod that Misschief!! Get on the back of frogsters, make a big mess of it, he cleans it up and you save yourself a fortune ;) Sounds like a bluddy great plan to me :lol2: rotflmao
***End of hijack***
I go several weeks between actual intercourse anyway at the moment, but if I had to refrain from letting my fingers do the walking, I reckon it wouldn't take longer than a week before I
Quote by Angel Chat
Sod that Misschief!! Get on the back of frogsters, make a big mess of it, he cleans it up and you save yourself a fortune ;) Sounds like a bluddy great plan to me :lol2: rotflmao

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Ok...... all girlies who want a ride on my Harley apply by PM……… lol
However, you need to assure me that you have no lower body jewellery, I am seriously worried about scratching the paint work……… sad
It cost me nearly £1500 for the art work on it FFS! :shock:
I suppose strategically placed plasters would be OK.
wink :wink:
Quote by MISSCHIEF
I've removed the shock absorbers and flat-spotted all the tyres. Pick you up about ;)

Ice I don't want my teeth to rattle out!!! :lol2:
I have a slightly more sedate 1974 vintage Raleigh Chopper with no tyres if that's any good? rotflmao