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Darkfire
Over 90 days ago
Bisexual Female, 50
0 miles · Greater London
Forum
I like the 'basic' style we have now - we all know how to use it, its comfortable and adequate to our needs - the only thing the forum needs to make it 'vibrant' (aka all singing all dancing) is the people - and we already have those
The Cafe, I feel, in the time that I've been here works because we;re all in one place. If you dont like the thread subject or its content goes a bit tits up, we walk away and dont read it/ lose interest/ stop posting on it. Opening up lots of different forums or 'rooms' like the chatroom, imo just creates 'segregation' - as it has in the chatrooms ( people primarily using one room, dont frequent the forum or other rooms much therefore become very well known within that little 'community' but no one else has a clue who they are, etc)
I think we do pretty well for threads that are absolutely nothing to do with swinging - and they dont get locked unless its total bollox, descends into a row or is hijacked past the point of no return - this isnt a dig, but the 'i've got a new dog' thread is a classic example. IMO we dont need seperate 'discussion rooms', it'll create more divide and more cliques (and yes I said the C word ).
just my 2p worth
The Cafe, I feel, in the time that I've been here works because we;re all in one place. If you dont like the thread subject or its content goes a bit tits up, we walk away and dont read it/ lose interest/ stop posting on it. Opening up lots of different forums or 'rooms' like the chatroom, imo just creates 'segregation' - as it has in the chatrooms ( people primarily using one room, dont frequent the forum or other rooms much therefore become very well known within that little 'community' but no one else has a clue who they are, etc)
I think we do pretty well for threads that are absolutely nothing to do with swinging - and they dont get locked unless its total bollox, descends into a row or is hijacked past the point of no return - this isnt a dig, but the 'i've got a new dog' thread is a classic example. IMO we dont need seperate 'discussion rooms', it'll create more divide and more cliques (and yes I said the C word
).just my 2p worth
halleluja!! i am here...... practically on the verge of a nervous breakdown :taz:
its day 1 of the hols, I only have one child but her, on top of 3 plasterers in the ktchen, no water cos they've turned the stop cock off cos my sink is now out on the patio, its hot, we cant go anywhere and leave them unsupervised, cant get in the garden because the back gate is blocked with a cement mixer and stuff, there's another 2 workmen outside finishing windows off and the dog hates them all....... and I have had enough!!!!!! :giveup:
oh happy days :shock:
its day 1 of the hols, I only have one child but her, on top of 3 plasterers in the ktchen, no water cos they've turned the stop cock off cos my sink is now out on the patio, its hot, we cant go anywhere and leave them unsupervised, cant get in the garden because the back gate is blocked with a cement mixer and stuff, there's another 2 workmen outside finishing windows off and the dog hates them all....... and I have had enough!!!!!! :giveup:
oh happy days :shock:
Quote by keeno
Are there many people out there who go bareback? Cos I was gobsmacked when I read their response.
I dunno how prevalent it is, but yeah it happens. You'll see alot of people say things like 'I'm D&D free' 0 implying that 'oh yeah, i definately havent got owt, honest' but is it worth the risk? you'll also see people specifically say they play bareback - as you have done already...
we can take the moral highground and say 'ooo nooo you mustn't do that' all we like, but it will alwyas come down the the individual's own choice.
The thing that always sticks in my head, and makes the decision for me, is the pyramid effect - how many other people have they played with, bareback, and how many have those partners played with, and how many have they played with..... and so it rumbles on. Imo using condoms is about protection and minimising risks - even if you're never likley to see that person again, if you're fucking them you have a responsibility to yourself, and to them, to show them enough respect to play safe. To me, that's the bottom line - what other folk do is up to them, but they wont be doing it with me
Quote by keeno
2. I need moral support as my sex drive is begining to win over my head.
Advice and comments please.
give yourself a very hard kick up the backside for even contemplating it for a start :shock:
there's no rapport there, there's no 'click', and they're asking you to play bareback when you have no idea who these people are. You idiot. :kick:
hows that for advice?
Quote by H-x
I'd like to think the guy's just having a bad day?
Someone pissed him off maybe and he's taking it out on us?
Who knows.
Salted for me please Dammie.
H.x
he could have dug himself out of that one - until he enlightened us as to what he really thinks of women and insulted one of our own. Wolf pack or not, he deserved that, imo.
Quote by Shireen_Mids
The only thing that really still bothers me is the "You've become too much a freind to fuck you now"
I somehow can't see past the thought that it's a bit of a "cop out" answer.
Dont you think that it is harder to say no to someone who has become a good friend but you wouldn't want to fuck?? Personally for all my confidence I do....
That's mainly because I would hate to loose that person as a friend... Fortunately it hasn't happened so far, but if it was a face to face moment I dont know what I would do
:thumbup:
I think sometimes maybe the best friendships are built on the mutual respect and trust gained from not wanting to fuck eachother
You can talk about stuff (anything) because its on a platonic level, and not as part of the 'i want to get you into bed' ritual. It sounds daft (on a swingers site) but sometimes that's how I see it. If someone said it to me, i'd probably take it as a 'i'm frightened of upsetting the applecart/ affecting our friendship, not as a 'cop out' (depending on the person, and the circumstances/ other people involved if playing together ever were on the cards
) Shireen I think it is infinately harder to say No to someone you like and respect as a friend than it is some strange bloke in a club, because it matters, to both/ all of you. If I say 'thankyou but I'm not interested' to somone who's mailed me from the ads section, or approached me in a club, it doesnt make me feel bad, it doesnt matter. But to someone I consider a 'friend' - as opposed to an aquaintance or mate - then it matters, it really does, espcially if they then feel like its a cop out, which would be quite sad really.
mind you, having said all that, I havent had any offers to decline anyway so have no fookin idea what i'm on about
