Quote by duncanlondon
Tune that might be interesting to read.
Eager has running the thread helped your friend in any way?
In the sense that there's been feedback from people who've experienced similar deception, yes, I think it's true to say it has.
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EagerSlut
Over 90 days ago
Bisexual Male, 68
0 miles · West Sussex
Forum
Sex God
Quote by varca
I'm thinking of people who "play the field" with the express intention of getting into as many girls' knickers as they can, either singles or in relationships. I'm not talking about people who are self confessed players and are upfront about their intentions.
I'm referring to the types who lie, cheat, flatter and manipulate in pursuit of their objectives, seemingly with no thought or consideration for the feelings, sensibilities and emotions of their targets or feelings of responsibilty about the damage and distress they can cause to those people.
They single out newbie single females for particular attention, viewing them as a soft and easy target.
Is this what swinging is really all about? I think not.
*****Doesn't happen on here? Don't you believe it.
I've seen it happen recently elsewhere but the person responsible is here as well. I'm sure he's not the only one so be careful.
I'm very angry about this because he totally abused the trust of a friend of mine and manipulated her to serve his own selfish ends.
I did think for a long time before posting this here but I'm happy to stand up for what I believe are swinging ethics. It's all about openess and honesty as far as I'm concerned.******
I'm sorry Eagerslut but from what I can see you put the cat amongst the pigeons. If you had left out the bits that I have asterisked in your original post, I think your post would have been taken in context and the rumour mill would now not be running on overdrive.
Well I'm not saying that you may not have a point and with hindsight I might have chosen my words slightly more judiciously to avoid that possibility but what is done is done and I stand by my reasons for posting. There is no need for a witch hunt, and rumours are not truths but gossip and since when has that never been around. Thanks for your comment though.
Sex God
Quote by DeeCee
i am amazed and slighlty concerned to have read that this isnt the only place this topic has been raised and that people are apparently "second guessing" who this person might be.......... scandalous when you consider that firstly.... we only have ES's viewpoint given as a 3rd party... possibly without the authority of the protaganists involved......... talk about a "witch hunt"!!!!!!
i fail to see how i myself might not have been a suspect in this scenario..........i hope i'm not......
i think the thread itself was totally wrong in principle...
I'm sorry that some people are STILL missing the point and referring to this thread as some kind of witch hunt. It's NOT a witch hunt. The trouble is that by referring to it as such and by posting in this manner they are in fact encouraging gossip. That was most certainly not the original intention.
There are no protagonists or combatants involved.
Everyone's entitled to their view but please.....let's keep a balanced perspective on this matter.
Thank you.
In Edit: If it's felt that it has run its course or is contributing to misinformed gossip then would a mod please lock it.
Sex God
Quote by Kiss
I've been trying not to post further on this issue.
At the end of the day if people are expected to play by certain rules (other than basic manners and respect), whether it be at a munch or in private, each person is responsible for making those rules clear. Not just the man, or the female or whatever. Men get hurt too, but does anyone feel it's worthy of a vendetta spanning two different websites?
Has the female in question (let's be honest, this is what this is all about) expressed a wish that this be turned into a witch hunt with subterfuge and whispering gossip in the hopes that the male will be ousted permanently? I can’t believe that every single person on here has never inadvertently hurt somebody. How would we all view each other if we all knew each others mistakes and secrets – however long ago they may have happened.
Whilst I am in no way discounting either of the two peoples feelings and thoughts on this matter – it should be for them to sort out.
IN EDIT: If time wasn't a great healer then there wouldn't be some people on this forum now. The stuff I was told 'privately' when I first joined. Luckily I have the strength of mind to make my own judgements of people. Let's hope others do.
And yes this was a post and be dammed moment - and I fully intend to take any stick that may come my way.
I'd just like to make it clear that this is neither a vendetta spanning two different web sites, nor an attempt to oust someone. It's a warning and discussion about irresponsible swinging as the subject title says. There's nothing unusual about such topics being posted in more than one place so please don't anyone read into it anything more than that. Thanks.
Sex God
Quote by mdr2000
And just to show what I mean here is a pm recieved by someone not posting for the very same reason...
Not saying any names but please read....
Mike - totally agree with your post.
Certain moderators treat posters - NEW posters, usually, with such disrespect, attacking their opinion, attacking even their right to have an opinion (if, for example, they have recently come back from another site) that I feel totally unable to express any opinion which goes against the popular view.
Genuine pm from someone who does not post....
Mike xx
People PAY to be made to feel like that? I'm gobsmacked! :shock: :shock: :shock:
Sex God
Quote by steanrachy
Hello again eager, nice to see you back, however i think that your approach was a little bit invitational to some criticism and was slightly verging on criticism of the site. SH has inevitably moved on since the "old days" but a few of the "lifers" are still doing the rounds and the place has settled into a great place to be again fr the most part.
We have all finally goten over the upheavel of the sale of the site and i think mentioning the fact that you "felt uneasy" saying certain things about the site was bound to ruffle a few feathers if your honest...??
best not to drag up the old "other places" and "feeling uneasy about voicing opinions (we voiced ours quite feverantly)" as this is long dead and buried.
Not having a pop tho eager, just an opinion and an observation, welcome back to SH!!
Thanks for that. It's appreciated! :cheers:
Sex God
Quote by fabio grooverider
ES.....
the grass isn't always greener elsewhere... for example i could have typed the same thing about where you reside mostly now... i don't particually feel comfortable there.. and i feel happier here than "there"
but i thought that we had gotten past all this now..so why drag it all up again, the places are different and people will make the best of the situation however they see fit.....
Fair point fabio mate. Perhaps it's just the jitters from feeling a bit like a newbie again.
Nuff said I think. Hope that is a reasonable explanation of things :thumbup:
Sex God
Nope Jags. I was being very careful, I thought, not to be seen to be having a moan. I thought my earlier remarks on this thread showed that.
All I was doing was asking why I should feel like this. Maybe being jumped on for asking the question goes some way to reinforcing my unease.
:undecided:
All I was doing was asking why I should feel like this. Maybe being jumped on for asking the question goes some way to reinforcing my unease.
:undecided:
Sex God
Quote by naughtynymphos1
I agree with you ES my one and only rule is that i don't meet people who are playing away tho i have found out after that i have met 2 married guys who both told me they was single, i felt that these guys totally disrespected my rules as a swinger, swinging is not about saying what evers needed to get a 'shag' its about respecting other swingers and their own personal rules and limits and if someone as a swinger says they do not do something then i expect that to be respected, other wise we are not swingers we are all just after a easy shag, the respect of other is what makes us swingers and not just quick shag seekers surely
personally have no problem with married and cheating people, even tho i would not meet them and don't agree with it but what they do is their choice, what i do have a problem with is the ones who say they aresingle just to get a meet, no matter what ur back ground is be it single, couple, married and cheating or other wise swinging is about trust and respect and if you have none of that you have no place being here
In a nutshell and that's my entire point. Thank you NN hunni
Sex God
Quote by davej
One thing I have noticed (about myself), and I'll put this in the form of a question, is this:
Why do I feel a tad insecure about expressing an opinion here about the site? Am I being silly or what?
aint got a clue eager you tell us, you were never insecure about it before so why now.
I've never felt like this before dave. Certainly never in the place where I mostly hang out nowadays :rascal:
Sex God
I find what you've just said really interesting. I joined this site in May 2004. I've hardly been in here at all since December last year, just after it was sold and went commercial. I don't pay anything to be here.
It's only really in the last 2 or 3 days that I've started hanging out in here a bit once again. I don't really have much to say about it that I'd wish to comment on at the moment, other than it's clear from some of the stuff that's been said that I've read, that quite a lot of things have changed........maybe some for the good
maybe some not so good.
One thing I have noticed (about myself), and I'll put this in the form of a question, is this:
Why do I feel a tad insecure about expressing an opinion here about the site? Am I being silly or what?
Oh! And what is this thing about blue crosses against your name that I've heard mention of?
:undecided:
It's only really in the last 2 or 3 days that I've started hanging out in here a bit once again. I don't really have much to say about it that I'd wish to comment on at the moment, other than it's clear from some of the stuff that's been said that I've read, that quite a lot of things have changed........maybe some for the good
maybe some not so good.One thing I have noticed (about myself), and I'll put this in the form of a question, is this:
Why do I feel a tad insecure about expressing an opinion here about the site? Am I being silly or what?
Oh! And what is this thing about blue crosses against your name that I've heard mention of?
:undecided:
Sex God
Quote by wild rose and the stag
woooohooooooo
we call tonight a result
thanks you two, it was fun.....do it again some time ???
we watched someone at last , we did it ,we did it, we did it!!!!
wrats
xx
Blimey! Is this a good enough reason for another party camping weekend?
:lol: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:
Sex God
There are some good points being made. Polo's "take" on it is blunt (as ever!!) but well reasoned.
There will always be gossip and rumour, informed and misinformed opinion, etc., etc., wherever a group of people congregate for long enough. Swinging communities are no different.
I don't have a problem with players/quick shag merchants........whatever you choose to call them. My gripe is with dishonesty when it's used to achieve what they seek, without regard to the feelings of the other person involved and the effect on them. FFS in this scene, probably more than anywhere else, it's not difficult to say to someone I'd like to shag/play with you (if that's the intention) but it goes no further than that! Or is that too difficult for some people?
In some ways I wish I'd never started this thread. I am not a shit stirrer as those who know me can (I hope) attest to. That was not the reason for posting it. I hope it will serve as a warning to people (especially single girls) to tread carefully, that's all.
I had no idea so many people had been hurt by the actions of some people, but, judging by some of the PMs I've had, it's a sad fact that this is indeed the case. I hope no-one will be deterred from seeking fun, making friends and being involved in the scene. Just be careful, take your time and go into everything with your eyes wide open, that's all.
There will always be gossip and rumour, informed and misinformed opinion, etc., etc., wherever a group of people congregate for long enough. Swinging communities are no different.
I don't have a problem with players/quick shag merchants........whatever you choose to call them. My gripe is with dishonesty when it's used to achieve what they seek, without regard to the feelings of the other person involved and the effect on them. FFS in this scene, probably more than anywhere else, it's not difficult to say to someone I'd like to shag/play with you (if that's the intention) but it goes no further than that! Or is that too difficult for some people?
In some ways I wish I'd never started this thread. I am not a shit stirrer as those who know me can (I hope) attest to. That was not the reason for posting it. I hope it will serve as a warning to people (especially single girls) to tread carefully, that's all.
I had no idea so many people had been hurt by the actions of some people, but, judging by some of the PMs I've had, it's a sad fact that this is indeed the case. I hope no-one will be deterred from seeking fun, making friends and being involved in the scene. Just be careful, take your time and go into everything with your eyes wide open, that's all.
Sex God
Quote by robbie_rob
the forum is defintely not the place to target single women!!
The forum is the place where they establish their persona by bouncing off other members,create a trustworthy persona and become a part of the furniture through regular posting. Unfortunately, having established their credentials here, they use their reputation as Mr NiceGuy to play the field once they're involved in munches, socials etc,.
My concern is when they manipulate and play with the emotions of the girls in order to get their way.
I'd just like to say again that I don't have any problem with honest players. It's the deceit that I'm so angry about. This has only become an issue for me because one of these scroats has callously fekked about with a very warm and lovely girl (not a member of SH) who happens to be a friend of mine and who, for various reasons which it's not necessary to detail here, was vulnerable to his particular brand of deception.
This is not an easy thing to post about in an open forum like this. I hope people will appreciate where I'm coming from. I don't have a problem with being held accountable for my remarks.
Sex God
I'm thinking of people who "play the field" with the express intention of getting into as many girls' knickers as they can, either singles or in relationships. I'm not talking about people who are self confessed players and are upfront about their intentions.
I'm referring to the types who lie, cheat, flatter and manipulate in pursuit of their objectives, seemingly with no thought or consideration for the feelings, sensibilities and emotions of their targets or feelings of responsibilty about the damage and distress they can cause to those people.
They single out newbie single females for particular attention, viewing them as a soft and easy target.
Is this what swinging is really all about? I think not.
Doesn't happen on here? Don't you believe it.
I've seen it happen recently elsewhere but the person responsible is here as well. I'm sure he's not the only one so be careful.
I'm very angry about this because he totally abused the trust of a friend of mine and manipulated her to serve his own selfish ends.
I did think for a long time before posting this here but I'm happy to stand up for what I believe are swinging ethics. It's all about openess and honesty as far as I'm concerned.
I'm referring to the types who lie, cheat, flatter and manipulate in pursuit of their objectives, seemingly with no thought or consideration for the feelings, sensibilities and emotions of their targets or feelings of responsibilty about the damage and distress they can cause to those people.
They single out newbie single females for particular attention, viewing them as a soft and easy target.
Is this what swinging is really all about? I think not.
Doesn't happen on here? Don't you believe it.
I've seen it happen recently elsewhere but the person responsible is here as well. I'm sure he's not the only one so be careful.
I'm very angry about this because he totally abused the trust of a friend of mine and manipulated her to serve his own selfish ends.
I did think for a long time before posting this here but I'm happy to stand up for what I believe are swinging ethics. It's all about openess and honesty as far as I'm concerned.
Sex God
The BBD was respected and highly regarded by the members because he gave us a free site and common home to hang out in (SH Towers) and for lots of us I think it's true to say our lives changed for ever and we've never looked back.
It was a shock when the site was sold. I don't think he lost the respect of anyone because he did it though. I'm sure most people have their price and he had his reasons for doing it. He did a great deal to further the swinging lifestyle by creating SH and nurturing it to the success it achieved as a free site, and now enjoys as a commercial site.
Another free home was created elsewhere and some of us went there to continue the ethos. We were offered the opportunity by the new owners to stay here if we wanted and to enjoy all the benefits we already had at no cost. Some of us now hang out in both places to greater or lesser degrees. I think everyone's now happy with the way it all seems to work for us.
:D :D
It was a shock when the site was sold. I don't think he lost the respect of anyone because he did it though. I'm sure most people have their price and he had his reasons for doing it. He did a great deal to further the swinging lifestyle by creating SH and nurturing it to the success it achieved as a free site, and now enjoys as a commercial site.
Another free home was created elsewhere and some of us went there to continue the ethos. We were offered the opportunity by the new owners to stay here if we wanted and to enjoy all the benefits we already had at no cost. Some of us now hang out in both places to greater or lesser degrees. I think everyone's now happy with the way it all seems to work for us.
:D :D Sex God
Quote by H-x
I went back to college when I was 35 and had a great time. Good luck to you!
H.x
Whoaaaaaaaaaaaa! Just a minute. ........If you're over 35 I'll eat my thong!!! :shock: :shock:
Good luck Lou.....I'm sure you'll have a great time
:rascal: :rascal:
I'm 38, graduated in June.
Would you like English or French mustard with that?
H.x
Um..........err........... Eeeeeeeeeek!!! :shock: :shock: :shock: horseradish ok?
ops: :oops: 
Sex God
Quote by Jags
Woops
I think you'll find the word is 'Whoops' as defined by Michael Crawford in his heydays as the incompetent always fucking things up!!!
Just wanted to beat FB to it!!
Driveling = drivelling. If you're going to be insulting at least get it spelt correctly!
We love you Jags! :giggle: :giggle: :giggle:
:D :D 
and 
Eeeeeeeeeek! He hee!! to all you lovely peeps (the girls that is) :rascal: :rascal: :rascal: Sex God
Quote by HornyLittleBlondeEager
Nice to know you still come to visit us :thumbup:
Will you be staying for the weekend
Hiya HLB
:P Stranger things have been known to happen!
Think it's time I updated my profile but someone's moved all the buttons around! :shock: :shock: :shock:
