Horous's Profile

6 Apr 2005

Quote by RedHot
Does my sister "Redhot" use this site by any chance.
Just thought i would look in on the off chance.
BLOODY SPIDERS IN MY MOUTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
Y'know I thought there was something strangely familiar about you . . . wink

T-J
Oh Oh!!!!
John
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6 Apr 2005

Quote by Sarah1448
Well age is something you feel,
I admit to being about 40 ish! plus a little bit :P

So I must feel about 100 at the moment, having just added another year to my life, but in the morning I'll feel 16 til I get up, then about 25 through the day until reality kicks in then I know I'm now 47.
John
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6 Apr 2005

Quote by hornyred and dino
I cant stand priests , dont know why , they just freak me out , im absolutely petrified of them :eeek: .H`red

You want to come and see them the way I do, that would soon stop the fear.
John.
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6 Apr 2005

I don't think so. Fresh Cream is a natural substance, and as far as I am awere has no oil based substance in it. Save for loads of Saturated Fats.
But spray cream is much more fun.
John
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6 Apr 2005

Try setting the colour to 16 bit, and see if that improves the situation.
John

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6 Apr 2005

Quote by RedHot

16. Most of us have eaten a spider in our sleep.

My brother has eaten more than most :shock:
When he was younger and really annoying my sister and I, we used to catch spiders in a matchbox and drop them in his mouth when he was asleep to get our own back on him cool

:evil2:
We've still never told him after all these years cos now he's lovely and nothing like the irritating little brat he used to be wink

:grin:
Tracy-Jayne
Hope he doesn't use this Forum.
Too complicated for me Rachel, but I'd say over half are true.
John
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6 Apr 2005

Quote by
Yeeess...And some ladies prefer to do the shaving... :shock:
So here's the question...(Men Only I'm afraid) How much trust would you put in a lady armed only with a cut-throat razor and a styptic pencil who was intent on shaving your scrotum..? :
Personally, I'd be up for it...The suspense would be delicious (especially if blind-folded)
Me blindfolded that is, not the shaver...
:twisted: :twisted: :twisted:

Coward, let the girl be blindfolded.
John
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4 Apr 2005

Right On.
John
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4 Apr 2005

Quote by Naughty Wigan Couple
If only I'd got here before eight.

I've just reread the topic.
John

Bloody Hell!!! Dont say you were offering as well. How come all the single guys who post one liners get all the offers? wink

No I'm just horny, and thought I'd just got lucky, that was until I reread the post.
Never mind, and I promise I'm trying to write more.
John
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4 Apr 2005

Can that be Pineapple from a tin, or should it be fresh?
John
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4 Apr 2005

Superb.
John
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4 Apr 2005

John Crichton

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4 Apr 2005

Kill Bill.

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4 Apr 2005

Has anyone got a couple of slices of bread tp spare? Please.
John
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4 Apr 2005

And here was I thinking that these things were for stimulation. I suppose Heart Massage could be classed as stimulation.
John
wink

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4 Apr 2005

Mais Non,
just had to keep something hidden for a while.
john
wink

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4 Apr 2005

Oh I've come over all strange. You on your hands and knees, unable to see. redface

Just got a fantasy of mine going.
John
Hides in Corner until safe to return to Forum
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4 Apr 2005

Promise I'll be Gentle :P
John
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4 Apr 2005

Cheese, got to be Cheese.
John
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4 Apr 2005

Glad it was dog food, those Corned Beef tins can be dangerous.
John
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4 Apr 2005

I'd rather you had the big nipples to, and one day I may be lucky enough to shake them with my now dry hands.
John.
PS what's this about Twaddle? Is this a new pervision I've missed out on?
redface

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4 Apr 2005

Quote by rachel-lane
I'm not going to answer this post, I don't get a weekend, work seven days a week, but the job does have some fantastic perks. I may reveal all later.
John

if it involves gin, voddy, sambuca , and 5 shots of tequila lined in a nice pretty row, i need a new job john :twisted:
You're gettin warm Rachel.
John
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4 Apr 2005

Wipes hands on tea towel, try these.
John
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4 Apr 2005

Quote by Maia
I think big nipples should be reserved for women actually. Men just function much better with large,,, ermm.. hands.. methinks..

Just Hands?
John
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4 Apr 2005

I'm not going to answer this post, I don't get a weekend, work seven days a week, but the job does have some fantastic perks. I may reveal all later.
John
redface

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4 Apr 2005

Well said Sir, tell me did you ever get the Corned Beef out of the tin?
John
wink

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4 Apr 2005

Quote by Mac69
It sounds like the cv of a high court judge to me...

He said 41, not 82!
Glad you picked that up Mac, bit like Popes, High Court Judges don't get appointed until they've passed their sell by date.
John
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4 Apr 2005

Great Sarge.

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4 Apr 2005

Quote by RedHot
Do you mean *Plastic Bertrand* a singer French IIRC. Can't even begin to write the title of his only know (to me anyway lol) song
Tracy-Jayne
EDIT NOTE - Jags beat me to it

Red's right you know, now what was the question?
John redface

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4 Apr 2005

Oh Sarge, please just tonight, tomorrow is my special day, please don't be crule, tell him Secretmaccamslag, make him let me stay up a while.
John :cry:

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