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Minx_N_BigDanny
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 52
Bi-curious Female, 55
UK
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24
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Forum
Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Quote by tallnhairy
but did they come back ??
Why we need this back at the top, there are loads of threads where people moan about this or that. After often a heated row things settle, the threads drift into the SH history and this is for the best...
No pun intended but lets let sleeping dogs lie...

Well said TnH,
But surely by repling to the thread you are just putting it back at the top aren't you? lol
Ah bugger! :twisted:
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Quote by Happy Cats
So good he posted it twice!
Danny your turn -

Yeah, I dunno how I did that redface
OK, here goes.
"There has never been a better time to visit the Middle East because........."
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Quote by Happy Cats
The more chavs there are in this country, the brighter our future is because ………………

We as a nation must stand proud by the Chav (and Chavs, Neds, Townies, Kevs, Charvers, Steeks, Spides, Bazzas, Yarcos, Ratboys, Kappa Slappers, Skangers, Scutters, Janners, Stigs, Scallies, Hood Rats) culture. They are a product of our new-found cultural beliefs and our TV scheduling. Thanks to the work of the Chav and their petitions to UK networks, Sky and Channel 5, we are all now able to watch "Ultimate fighting championship", "Booze Britain" and "I am an idiot watch me hurt myself".
These young men and woman (don't forget the Chavettes) are allowing us to broaden our horizons and build a better England.
What other country can boast a generation who have their own uniform (baseball cap, Banded t-Shirt, white trainers, gold necklaces and sovereign rings) and march together in groups (well apart from Nazi germany of course)?
Then there is the fact that we have a new generation of names to mix in with all of the old ones. In 15 or 20 years time we will be working with many Aaliyah's and Kai's and who can say that is a bad thing?
Lastly, there is happy slapping, the main sport of the Chav and which is to be the backbone of our 2012 Olympic bid. We will be happy slapping champions the world over and we can catch it all on our mobile phones to keep us amused for eternity.
They are the politicians, athletes and film stars of tomorrow and I say our future depends on sterilising them!
and beside, can you ever have too much Burberry? I think not!
rolleyes
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Quote by Silk and Big G
Dont talk about revenge Fab mate . If you wear it to the nest munch that way , who knows it could work as an afrodisiac ! ?

:rascal: :laughabove:
Only if you spin him around! lol
I reckon it is all a front (geddit afro-nt? innocent )
Your 'do might be something to dig
Or mistaken by bros for a wig,
But if ever the door
Isn't wide enough for
Your hair, then your 'fro is too big. :lol:
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Quote by tonysb09
i keep it well trimmed and shaved nuts...
:shock: i dont wanna inflict hairy nuts on the ladies....ewwww

yeah, but don't you find shaving your nuts really buggers up the lawn-mower? redface
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Bluexxx, can you define a Goth for me? I have always wondered exactly what it means.
:P
PS, if you know how to define what a Goth is, then you probably are one...
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Quote by Libra+Love
took me a year :doh: to learn how to do Multi quotes :shock: :shock:
with the help of postie finally managed it lol

Multi Quotes???? u got me now ..... Is it anything like a multi orgasm... dunno
Shhhhh..... say you'll have people multi all the time now. hump :wanker: :sticky:
:laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :thumbup:
Nice one Libra+Love,
I didn't learn anything new, but you must have improved chances for women all over the country.
I reckon you should get commendation from the ladies on here. Arise Dame Libra+Love? Or would you just prefer a voucher for one free multiple-orgasm?
:lol:
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Hey hottie,
if I am quick, I will be the first one to say a big :welcome: to the mad house!
I think you are going to fit right in.
PS, mines a pint with a Brandy chaser.... wink
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Wife Swapping
Two couples had gone away for the week-end. The two guys, Jack and Bill, have decided to try to persuade their wives to have a bit of partner swapping for the night.....
The guys have agreed that if they can pull off the wife swap, when they sit around the breakfast table the following morning, they will tap their teaspoon on the side of their coffee mug the number of times that they did it with each other's enough!
After several drinks that night they succeed! Jack knows it's that time of the month for his wife and the thought of Bill not knowing this makes him smile.
The next morning they are all at the breakfast table, slightly hungover and quite uncomfortable, when Jack proudly taps his teaspoon 3 times against his coffee mug.
After a brief moment of thinking, Bill takes his teaspoon and taps it once on the strawberry jam and 3 times on the nutella.
:grin: innocent
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
"So madame" Said the police officer..."Can you identify the man who goosed you at the Munch from our line-up"?
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Quote by kazswallows
nope it didnt get me, i chose a wheelchair. It gave me an explanation at the end saying everyone has their own way of answering the questions and some of the question they would have answered differently.
ie can it be used in an office ....i answered yes (well if someone was in it) they would put no
does it get wet......i answered yes (when your outside and it rains) they would put no
does it fold........i answered yes (well you have to, to put it away or in a car, they would put no.
so are they insinuating i am cheating mad :x lol :lol: :lol: :lol:

:laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove:
Nice one Kaz pretends to Swallows but really spits it out discreetly ! As if! :lol:
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
This is all very good advice Equi, but want I want to know is....
Did you know how to open the bonnet? lol
I have to say that whenever our car went wrong, I used to send my ex down to the garage with it. If she came back with a story that sounded like he had been bullshitted, I would not use them. if they treated her with respect and what they said made sense, I would take the car to them myself to have the work done. :twisted:
See! Woman are useful for something!! innocent
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Well it seems that some of you are winning, which makes me feel even worse! redface
How the hell did it not get a carrott?!?!?! ffs! lol
Back to the drawing board for me..........ah, i wonder if it will get a drawing board! confused
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Hey all,
A friend sent this link to me a while back. I still can't beat the bloody thing and it is driving me fuckin* crackers! mad
It is great way to while away a boring afternoon.
If anyone can stump the comp, let me know how you did it... lol
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Quote by Ice Pie
I think we should all request Ice's version!!!!

I am ineligible since I'm the judge. :P
Was that a cop-out or what? ;)
Oh alright, I'll think of something after the GP... gotta get my priorities right. biggrin
Good, can you judge the bloody thing then!?!? I have heard that the winner gets a night with 6 SH members of their choice. :twisted:
I cannot wait to collect....... wink
Danny (clearly the winner)
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
if it is someone at work that is annoying you Equi, follow the three simple rules:
1) Always stay seated. It always gives you the power in any situation.
2) Breathe! Make sure that you ar breathing normally. When you get stressed people have a tendancy to shorten their breath, or even hold it altogether.
3) Always take the moral high ground. Always bring the matter in question back to how you could both best help the company.
I hope this helps. lol
Oh, and btw, I do have a 4th tip if you are interested.
4) A fore-arm smash into the bridge of the nose causes a lot of pain and lots of blood. You may get arrested, but he is never going to give you a problem again. :twisted:
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Quote by equi-princess
I have never played Strip-Poker...... but it cant be that difficult....... i mastered Snap ok !!!
I would wish the game to be played fair and square..... otherwise i dont stand a chance....lol
equi-princess xxx
(severely tempted !!)

Ok then...... there's one for Strip Poker!!! hehehehe evil
What are the rules ?????????
equi-princess xxx
(severely tempted)
I think that you should join Wishy and I for my version of the game as detailed above Equi-Princess!! We should have some fun. :twisted:
PS dont worry wishy, I will tell you the rules as soon as I make them up. They are likely to be things like if you lose a hand then anyone with a penis gets and extra 5 cards....
I'm sure you need more than 3 players though don't you???????
equi-princess xxx
(severely tempted)
Don't worry Equi-Princess, I am hoping that Debs, NN and Libra+Love can make up the numbers!! :twisted:
and that Wishy can't make it
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
OK, here goes nothing.....
Bob, A newbie goes to his first munch. he is hoping to meet some of the people he has spoken to and even those he has had "virtual sex" with in one way or another.
All is going well, and with a few drinks he is slowly coming out of his shell (not you Yorkieshell!) and is getting chatty with all of the regulars.
he gets talking to a well known couple, Sharon and Greg and they introduce him to a few people who are up for some play. They all get on well and Greg whispers in Bobs ear "I think my missus and her g/f Tracey want you mate".
Bob is delighted that he has an invite to an afters party and decides that he needs a bit of "Dutch courage" so he downs a few more drinks.
Once back at the afters party, he stands at the bar looking out for Sharon, Tracey and Greg but they are nowhere to be seen. He is having a few drinks and soaking up the atmosphere when Greg comes out of one of the rooms and gives him a wave.
Bob downs his drink and heads over to the room where he finds Sharon and Tracey getting all hot and sweaty. Greg gives him a wink and dives back in so Bob decides to take the plunge.
He gets all of his kit off and starts watching the group having some fun...he plays with his willy, but nothing is happening. he is really turned on by the sight but the drink has had a damaging effect.
Tracey notices the problem and motions for him to come over. Bob does and Sharon takes his flaccid penis in her mouth whilst gently massaging his balls.
After a couple of minutes and still no blood supply, Tracey has a go. Still nothing. They are just about to suggest that Greg tries his luck, just in case when Bob pipes up "I am really sorry guys I think I have had too much to drink".
Sharon looks at Greg in disgust..."You never get anything right do you Greg" she says....
"I told you to find me a hardened swinger.....!"
rolleyes
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Just thought of some more!
BBW - I like big butts and I canot lie!! (Wierd al?)
cam fun - video killed the radio star.
Vix's personal theme toon - The song from Queen (I want it all, I want it all, I want it all and I want it NOW!)
wink
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Minx_N_BigDanny
Sexpert
Quote by equi-princess
I have never played Strip-Poker...... but it cant be that difficult....... i mastered Snap ok !!!
I would wish the game to be played fair and square..... otherwise i dont stand a chance....lol
equi-princess xxx
(severely tempted !!)

Ok then...... there's one for Strip Poker!!! hehehehe evil
What are the rules ?????????
equi-princess xxx
(severely tempted)
I think that you should join Wishy and I for my version of the game as detailed above Equi-Princess!! We should have some fun. :twisted:
PS dont worry wishy, I will tell you the rules as soon as I make them up. They are likely to be things like if you lose a hand then anyone with a penis gets and extra 5 cards....
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