I split after 24years of marriage, the hurt feeling carries on for a long while.
I feel for you. If you cannot get back together then you need to look at a few things with some priority in my mind. Try and keep it friendly as, if it looks as if it is getting nasty, money and financial security gets very important.
You need to take some control of yourself. Because, if your partner is more astute than you, you could end up loosing more that just your relationship.
1/ If there is an appreciable capital tied up (house, car, Caravan etc), then get legal advice soon.
2/ Stop any bank accounts that may be in joint names.
3/ Get all utility bills changed to her name (if she lives in your old marital home.) This includes phone bills. You are wholly liable or jointly liable according to whose name is on the bill. Phoning a premuim rate number in Australia and leaving the phone off the hook is a sure way of getting revenge on you and emtying your bank account. :cry:
4/ Do NOT stop paying the mortgage.
5/ Try and appear to any children that they carry no fault and you still love them.
6/ Lastly, move out and get your post redirected so she will not know what legal/financial moves you may be making.
Belive it or not, the Doctors is a good place to go. Anti-depressants, sleeping tabs and councelling can help.
Of course, the kids are the main thing, so make sure you provide for them.
. In both instances it was out of frustration and I really regreted it afterwards and as soon as tempers had subsided all efforts were made to forgive.