Reese's Forum Posts | Swinging Heaven

Join the most popular community of UK swingers now

Reese

Over 90 days ago

Bisexual Male, 61

0 miles · Somerset

Profile Friends Follows Forum

Groups Meets Parties Stories

Forum

6 Jul 2006

Awww, thanks sooo much, guys! kiss

kiss

Sorry to be so late in arriving, but I was tied up with this lovely G-cup redhead who'd promised me a super-slurpy wet & wicked fantasy blowjob for my birthday. :twisted:
As for my gifties, I got a druidic robe, an infrared massaging foot bath, a map centred on our property form the late 1800s and a bottle of absinthe (not only that, it was LaFee!)! I'll attach photos to this post.
Tonight, Vix, myself and our daughter are off to a nearby pub for a celebratory dinner and our weekly pub quiz. As Vix has informed the landlord of this auspicious occasion, I am expecting a round of obscure American questions so that we're sure to win. ;)
Cheers,
~Reese! surprised

surprised

P.S. to Dollyminx: Erm, mid if we share a bit more than cake?! :smitten:

By the way, that's the map I got on the wall behind me.

6 Jul 2006

Thanks, Vix! :love:
I'll go for the full-on French-snogathon action, thank you very much... passionkiss

passionkiss

...and then some! blast

blast

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm a bit tied up with a lovely G-cup redhead who'd promised me a super-slurpy wet & wicked fantasy blowjob for my birthday. ;)

22 Jun 2006

'Twas a tiny 1979 Honda Civic hatchback. MMF threesome in the front seats at the drive-in (or a foursome, if you count the annoying stick-shift protruding dangerously from the centre console). March 8th, 1981, if I recall correctly.

20 Jun 2006

Quote by 9inchgirth
im keeping my eye on this on though. its rather funny!!

Glad to be of amusement, girthy...but ,as Vix said, despite my light-hearted way of doing this, we really are serious in our quest for single, well-endowed bi-males (and I really don't have a black leather hand where my cock should be)!

20 Jun 2006

Quote by 9inchgirth
Reading what has been writen about measuring a willy. Started laughing at how sad some guys can be............ Started picturing someone deciding where to measure from.............. lmao................... fell off my chair.
Had no idea forums could be so dangerous!!!................ bloody funny though

Hmmm. Do you think we should request plaster casts?! lol

lol

20 Jun 2006

Quote by twos_company
the biggest one we know on here.............
hasn`t got enough blood in his body to keep it up....................
biggest is not always best!!!!!!!!
:twisted:

Oooh! That's not a problem at all - send 'im over!! Vix frequently just tells guys "shaddup and get on yer back" anyway... :grin:

20 Jun 2006

Quote by niceandgentle
Reese.
I declare you the winner of your own contest lol!

Bugger! That's no fun... sad

sad

...autofellatio ability notwithstanding; it just isn't the same. Besides, I'm certain, reading through a majority of the single male ads herein, I'm fairly average. ;)

Quote by Sassy-Seren
Now summising that 'well endowed' means 8" or above, would that be a man's 8" or a woman's 8" ?? :giggle:

Ha! We'll take the "woman's 8 inches" please, provided we're talking actual penetration depth there. Honestly, you've got to wonder where some of these guys boasting "ten hard inches" are measuring from. Their sphincter?! I always thought you were supposed to measure from above the base of the penis, ruler pressed firmly against the pubic bone, to the tip.

Quote by new2trot
I didn't think sausage or kebab pictures where allowed to be posted in the forums no more??
Tony

Apparently not - although I was unaware of this fact. redface

redface

My apologies to the mods smile

smile

newt xx
True, true. But you could always PM them to us! :rascal:

Quote by 9inchgirth
interesting!!!!!!
Promote the ugliest part of the male body!....... Could be funny i guess!..............
........... do they have to both long and thick or would just thick qualify??

Quiet, you! You know you're already "in there". :twisted:
Yes, thick is adequate, too...provided there's enough length for a good DVP!

Quote by Jas-Tim
For all you bi chaps out there.....
This is a very genuine couple with a very genuine request.
Good luck

Thanks, Jas! silly

silly

assionkiss:

11 Jun 2006

Quote by makingcocoa
I have had a lovely BBQ this afternoon with lovely people and everything is lovely.
Pimms, anyone?

What a coincidence, so did we! Sans Pimms, mind...
...hmm, do you think that's perhaps why the villagers here refer to you as "Posh Spice"? :grin:

11 Jun 2006

Quote by dambuster
I hate getting a mouthful, third hand

You've got three hands?! :shock: You should be a veritable frisk-master, then! lol

lol

25 Apr 2006

Apparently, I'm...
56% Ricky Martin
56% Paul Cezanne
56% David Hasselhoff
58% Steven Spielberg
61% Vladamir Mayakovsky
66% Abhishek Bachchan
66% Adam Ant
66% Frank Zappa
66% Tim Roth
70% Jack Warden
...hmm.
~Reese! surprised

surprised

P.S. I'd uploaded.

2 Dec 2005

Quote by MikeNorth
Reese, it's for you! :lol:

You rang? It appears as if I've developed a reputation here... redface

redface

...mind you, I'm not the only one from the site who engages in this particular perversion.

Quote by tallnhairy
I just wonder if you would lose a lot from the position you would need to be in to do it?

Depends on the position, really. I find that if you lie on your back and curl your toes up under the headboard, you can use the leverage provided to thrust into your mouth and just inhale on every upstroke! ;)
~Reese! surprised

surprised

P.S. Oh, and despite what some people think, it's still far more pleasurable to have someone else do it for you. :P

1 Dec 2005

Quote by makingcocoa
Hmmm. Thursday, July 2nd, 2048. Hope no one's planning anything special for my 84th birthday, which would've been just four days after that.
Fuck that, I'm just short and curvy.

Mmmmmmmmmmm. Short and curvy. May I? :smitten:
You'd better passionkiss

passionkiss

- and before your 84th birthday, apparently! :D
Double mmmmmmmmmmm! In that case, how many times can you fit me in between now and then?! :twisted:
I think that sounds like a worthy subject for experiment.... :D
*feeling all scientific now* Excellent!! Will fetch out me apparatus and dust off the abacus! :bounce:

30 Nov 2005

Quote by Bloke2005
'straight' blokes coming in thick and fast...

Mmmm. Sounds like my kinda party! Can Vix & I come, too?! surprised

surprised

Quote by westerross
Mind you, I couldn't stop it from blocking the sink hole all the time!!

Just be thankful you didn't have one of those Dispos-All drains with the whirring blades like I did back in the 'States! :shock:

Quote by Bloke2005
Puffs the pair of you..........

What? Cocoa Puffs?! confused

confused

30 Nov 2005

Quote by makingcocoa
Hmmm. Thursday, July 2nd, 2048. Hope no one's planning anything special for my 84th birthday, which would've been just four days after that.
Fuck that, I'm just short and curvy.

Mmmmmmmmmmm. Short and curvy. May I? :smitten:
You'd better passionkiss

passionkiss

- and before your 84th birthday, apparently! :D
Double mmmmmmmmmmm! In that case, how many times can you fit me in between now and then?! :twisted:

30 Nov 2005

Quote by westerross

Tune~
Oooh! Is that essence of penis I perceive protruding provocatively in the penumbra of your picture?! :shock:
~Reese! surprised

surprised

P.S. to Blokey: Imagine my disappointment when I discovered that the first photo your posted was not a self portrait. Go on, just imagine! :cry:

30 Nov 2005

Hmmm. Thursday, July 2nd, 2048. Hope no one's planning anything special for my 84th birthday, which would've been just four days after that.

Quote by makingcocoa
Fuck that, I'm just short and curvy.

Mmmmmmmmmmm. Short and curvy. May I? :smitten:

30 Nov 2005

Being the exceedingly shallow people that we are, Vix & I always require photos before a meet. :P Besides, prospective partners can see us first anyway courtesy of the photo ads, so it seems only fair.
One thing that perturbs us, however, is the majority of couples ads that only feature a photo of one-half of the couple (most often the female). What's up with that? Aren't we going to be meeting up with both of you?! confused

confused

~Reese!

surprised

30 Nov 2005

Sure, it's an old story that I'm sure everyone is bored with by now, but seeing as this is a new thread... :P
I, too, had my first threesome experience in my mid-teens with a best mate and his then-fiancee. Not only was this my first exposure to the concept of "swinging", but also the origin of my life-long obsession with breasts. silly

silly

hwoar:

lol

It all began rather serendipitously: The three of us were sitting in my parents living room watching the telly one weekend whilst they were away, and the conversation turned to penis size (as it does). She said that her boyfriend was huge, but it didn't really show unless he was in a state of arousal (i.e. a grower, not a shower), whereas she observed that I looked fairly sizeable all the time. The naughty minx then decided that the only way to accurately judge would be to get a ruler, which I promptly found in the kitchen drawer.
He was the first to be assessed. She knelt down in front of him, unzipped his trousers and administered some "manual stimulus". Although his response was predictable, I didn't expect the resultsâ€¦nearly 11 inches!!
I was next, after she nervously asked her boyfriend if she could "de-pants" me and he surprisingly agreed. She lowered my trousers down to my knees and sat down on the couch next to me. Because of the earlier "show" between the two of them, there was no need to provide any additional stimulus. I must say that ever since that comparison I've felt somewhat inadequate, despite protestations to the contrary by subsequent sex partners.
After she'd obtained her desired scientific data, she remained sitting next to me on the couch, casually gliding her fingertips over the underside of my cock. Within minutes, her playful stroking had turned into a full, tight grip. I couldn't believe she was actually giving me a handjob in front of her fiancee! Even moreso, I couldn't believe that he hadn't said anything!! However, much later, I had learned that he was quietly seething inside the whole time...but that's another story.
As the situation seemed quite comfortable, I let my hands begin to wander. Moving one up beneath her t-shirt, I began stroking the underside of one of her huge breasts (for a girl just a year older than myself, she was quite well-endowed). I moved upward, playing my thumb across her nipple. As soon as I felt it grow erect to my gentle touch, I couldn't contain myself any longer and exploded, showering the front of my own t-shirt with cum.
We cleaned ourselves up and continued watching the telly. The film was "Snoopy Come Home", and I still get terribly turned on whenever I so much as hear the theme music!
After that first surprise encounter, the three of us shared several menage et trois experiences over the following month or so - each time enjoying further indulgence in her magnificent breasts - and, ultimately, she became "my first" (heterosexually speaking, that is...the great thing about bi-ness being that you get to lose your virginity twice!) in my very own bed whilst her boyfriend looked on.
Although she & I stopped having full-on sex after those menage et trois days, we remained the best of friends - "body-buddies", even, because we'd sometimes get to fondling each other to the point of mutual masturbation during our frequent naps together. While we were never proper "boyfriend & girlfriend", per se, we still shared everything together (including detailed descriptions of her current shags, which always proved to be a stimulating topic).
Then, between the ages of 16 and 37, the idea of swinging remained nothing more than a pleasant memory (and one within which I indulged often). When I met Vix, I finally found myself in a relationship where I was comfortable enough to freely discuss all of my past sexual experiences. I suppose this may have opened the door to the future, as we began swinging together in similarly serendipitous circumstances three years later...and haven't looked back since!
~Reese! surprised

surprised

27 Nov 2005

I picked my favourites:
a sign, when given
avenges whining
sewn heaving gin
ewe having wings
she gave winning
shaven in new gig
win eggs in haven
shave Gwen in gin
have new gin sign
save henning wig
Eva, when singing
gashing new veins
gnawing even his
even in gang wish
wives in hen gang
hag's evening win
evening washing
having Ewen sing
hang Eve in wings
we hang, given sin
I hang Gwen's vine
given in new gash
evening shag win
gains when given
hen gives awning
sawing, even nigh
gene waving shin
when is nag given
vine hinge swang
wang given shine
gas given when in
hen wags given in
ah, evening's wing
ash venging wine
evening gin wash
vain hen egg wins
van's engine whig
I venge nigh swan
saw evening nigh
gag hen, win veins!

27 Nov 2005

:bounce: HAPPY BIRTHDAY :bounce:
I must say that this day comes as a bit of a relief, as I can no longer say that "if I were another year older, you'd be half my age!" lol

lol

Hope you're having a brilliant birthday!!
Hugs & Snogs,
~Reese! :love:

22 Nov 2005

Quote by booshsutton
Right im just wondering something.......... how do you measure a cock? alot of ads on here are looking for men with 10"+ cocks or whatever and id just like to know how you measure one! do you measure from the balls up to the tip? or is it along the top side, what you would see if you were looking down on it?

Sorry, but a serious reply here: I've always thought the standard was to measure from the pubic bone above the cock to the tip.

22 Nov 2005

Quote by postie
You leave your Colonial Legalese outside the door Reese matey

Oops, sorry 'bout that...had assumed it to have permeated the international lexicon. redface

redface

Quote by warwick
Reese you are so cruel my friend

Am not!! 'Twas an honest inquiry, is all. Besides, I don't think he fancies me anyway. :cry:
(will get me coat, now)

22 Nov 2005

Quote by postie
Hmmm just wondering is all.......

Ah, postie, postie, postie... I do hope this thread doesn't imply what I think it does. confused

confused

~Reese!

surprised

(taking the 5th)

22 Nov 2005

Quote by Sexysteph
I know at least 4 guys who could not fit in the upper end of the criteria

...and you have been willfully withholding this valuable information from Vix & me for how long?!

18 Nov 2005

Quote by Elliot
Reese - we are a UK company governed by Uk law, and have had a UK lawyer and a UK barrister draw up any legal concerns we have. We have some procedures that we are required to be put into place but it will be completly transparant to the end user.

2257 has been seriously burning everyone, not just U.S.-based companies. Although my own websites are hosted in Ireland and created in the UK, I have still had to bend over backwards to satisfy the requirements of this far-reaching legislation, which appears to have permeated throughout the entirety of the internet, regardless of national borders.
I've had colleagues in the Czech Republic nearly lose their businesses because of this. They were quick to comply, though, and I now have on file copies of the passports or photo IDs for each and every person whom they've contracted to appear on my own websites. ;)
So, until we know the implications of USC, Title 18, Section 2257 for the new-and-improved $H, I think it may be best to begin pulling our photo links until further notice. This may take a while, though, as there are quite a lot of them.
Cheers,
~Reese sad

sad

P.S. to Elliot: Out of curiosity, in which country is the SH server located?

18 Nov 2005

Quote by Elliot
Apologies to the questions i have missed, there are a lot, please post again if i missed them or was not clear enough.

Apology accepted, but I still need to know what you're doing about USC, Title 18, Section 2257? It's a rather critical issue for those of us who have sexually-explicit photos posted here.
Cheers,
~Reese

18 Nov 2005

Quote by Clare and Steve
But for instance,will people end up having to pay to view OUR pictures that we put up here??????

Actually, this brings up an important question: Since the site will now be run by a commercial entity who will be accepting payment for some premium services, will we now be required by law to comply with USC, Title 18, Section 2257 when posting sexually-explicit photos of ourselves?!
Anyone who has visited porn sites since June of this year may have noticed the little 2257 link added, indicating the site's compliance with this legislation. However, the nightmarish invasion of privacy required to maintain that compliance, not to mention the exhaustive record keeping requirements, would make it even more of a nuisance to post things like party photos here than it already is! rolleyes

rolleyes

I anxiously await an answer to this query, with my finger poised over the "delete" button for those posts containing Vix' & my wedding photos and such. Please let us know what you're doing with regard to 2257 and, if for some reason you're not familiar with its implications, I would suggest you consult your solicitors ASAP...as this law has impacted even the most marginally-commecial sites that feature anything which could be regarded as "porn" worldwide.
Cheers,
~Reese

17 Nov 2005

Quote by Alexandra
Geez, does no one else here use PlastiDip?!

lol lol lol
Well the luminous yellow would help if the lights were out! :shock:
(Nice to see you again Reece, btw!)
Comes in red, blue & clear, too, if yellow's not your thing! surprised

surprised

(thx Alex :love smile

smile

17 Nov 2005

Geez, does no one else here use ?! confused

confused

17 Nov 2005

Quote by naughtynymphos1
what about the guys tho? don't we have bi male swingers?

wave

Here's one. Thus, and like Blue (but for different reasons, primarily centring around our respective genitalia), I appear to have been left out of this poll as well. sad

sad

Vix & I have met plenty of other bi-guys through SH, but very few bi-couples. It almost seems as if there's an expectation for swinging women to be naturally bi-, whereas most of the male halves of couples who've replied to our ad tend to profess "100%str8"-ness. Is it that they find a same-sex act between two women provocative, but the same between two men repulsive?
Seems like much of a muchness to me. And, having spoken to a lot of women here, I've found that male bisexuality is a major turn-on for many of them. Hmm...do you think that, if we informed these Str8s of the possible pulling potential of bi-ness, they might become just a little less hardened in their heterosexuality? ;)
~Reese! surprised

surprised