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jellybelly
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 59
UK
Forum
Warming the Bed
Me i’d like to be a clitoris tucked up in bed most of the time and only awake for pleasure What a life 
Warming the Bed
Quote by Calista
After watching my neighbours trying to parallel park on the road opposite, I can scientifically confirm that women can't parallel park.
This is the same scientific confirmation that single guys are tosser is it?
Don't lump all women together because a few have difficulties ... the only reaon women some can't park is because they've had men tell them that this
<-------------------------------------------------------->
is 6 inches ;)
C x
The really sad part is my wife offered to do it for me
How sad am I
Looks 9 inches to me
Warming the Bed
Quote by Calista
B. My Feminine side coming out :rose:
Bugger off!
Some of us park better than males ;)
Definitely a male age thing I guess ;) you;l have to be careful where you try to squeeze now ;)
C x
You could have fit a bus in it no squeezing required just forgot how and i do it several times a day :twisted:
Warming the Bed
I’ve just had a nasty experience went to parallel park the car and forgot how to drive
Now this manoeuvre is normally instinctive no thought required but could my brain work it out hell NO
I had to drive of and try again this time no problem
What I want to know is
A. Is this Old Timers Disease :silly:
B. My Feminine side coming out :rose:
C. A Brain tumour forming resulting in my agonising death
D. Perfectly normal it happens to us all :bounce:
Now this manoeuvre is normally instinctive no thought required but could my brain work it out hell NO
I had to drive of and try again this time no problem
What I want to know is
A. Is this Old Timers Disease :silly:
B. My Feminine side coming out :rose:
C. A Brain tumour forming resulting in my agonising death
D. Perfectly normal it happens to us all :bounce:
Warming the Bed
You can buy special condoms for PA's
but in general its just as safe with normal ones same risk's
but in general its just as safe with normal ones same risk's
Warming the Bed
The bum is a more sensative area of the body more nerve endings so dont be fooled because its fleshy you wont fell it.
But if tattoo's hurt we wouldn't keep going back for more I've had 15 hours worth wife 23 hours worth 20 on one tattoo alone not one sitting though :shock:
As for content think hard you do not have to have the flash images that are shown in the studio a good tattooist will be able to put any image you like on you or even design one thats unique to you.
You can always take the jewellery out of a PA for meets just put it back in when finished.
But if tattoo's hurt we wouldn't keep going back for more I've had 15 hours worth wife 23 hours worth 20 on one tattoo alone not one sitting though :shock:
As for content think hard you do not have to have the flash images that are shown in the studio a good tattooist will be able to put any image you like on you or even design one thats unique to you.
You can always take the jewellery out of a PA for meets just put it back in when finished.
Warming the Bed
Sorry to get all serious but it works
Well my wife has just started a new weight loss program and the second rule is DON’T DIET just assess your current food intake and create new eating habits. So you can still eat as much but just change the combination ( Complex carbs instead of simple Carbs) (Chicken or Quorn instead of red meats)
That and regular exercise has worked wonders
The weight loss isn’t drastic but body shape is fantastic lost 3kg in 3 weeks (this is body fat not body tissue) But 2†on waste 1†on each Thigh and size loss in other areas
Well my wife has just started a new weight loss program and the second rule is DON’T DIET just assess your current food intake and create new eating habits. So you can still eat as much but just change the combination ( Complex carbs instead of simple Carbs) (Chicken or Quorn instead of red meats)
That and regular exercise has worked wonders
The weight loss isn’t drastic but body shape is fantastic lost 3kg in 3 weeks (this is body fat not body tissue) But 2†on waste 1†on each Thigh and size loss in other areas
Warming the Bed
Dvorak's Lied an den Mond From the Rusalka
And the entire Enigma catalogue
And the entire Enigma catalogue
Warming the Bed
Mine come from Stained Break the Cycle better as complete songs though
This is from OUTSIDE
I’m on the outside
I’m looking in
I can see through you
See your true colours
Cause inside your ugly
Your Ugly like me
I can see through you
See the real you
And from FOR YOU
This silence gets us nowhere!
Gets us nowhere way to fast!
The silence is what kills me
I need someone to help me
But you don’t know how to listen.
This is from OUTSIDE
I’m on the outside
I’m looking in
I can see through you
See your true colours
Cause inside your ugly
Your Ugly like me
I can see through you
See the real you
And from FOR YOU
This silence gets us nowhere!
Gets us nowhere way to fast!
The silence is what kills me
I need someone to help me
But you don’t know how to listen.
Warming the Bed
Trust is different for everyone where it begins or ends varies from person to person, length of relationship, type of relationship prior to loss of trust etc.
In my own case I used to swing with my first wife and she became jealous of certain types of women ( Large breasted Blondes) my type has always been small breasted Brunettes ??? Shouldn’t cause a problem you think!! No the mere presence at parties would cause issues. So we gave up swinging and eventually divorced (yes she became a cheat).
I’m now remarried have been for 11 years and I trust her unconditionally and always have she hasn’t had to earn trust it should just be there, if it isn’t it’s a problem within yourself not with your partner.
I say this because my ex has now undergone psychiatric & hypnotherapy and the jealousy was related to unresolved childhood issues (her mum was a large breasted blonde who was a serial cheat)
So look into yourself for the answers nobody else can give them to you.
In my own case I used to swing with my first wife and she became jealous of certain types of women ( Large breasted Blondes) my type has always been small breasted Brunettes ??? Shouldn’t cause a problem you think!! No the mere presence at parties would cause issues. So we gave up swinging and eventually divorced (yes she became a cheat).
I’m now remarried have been for 11 years and I trust her unconditionally and always have she hasn’t had to earn trust it should just be there, if it isn’t it’s a problem within yourself not with your partner.
I say this because my ex has now undergone psychiatric & hypnotherapy and the jealousy was related to unresolved childhood issues (her mum was a large breasted blonde who was a serial cheat)
So look into yourself for the answers nobody else can give them to you.
Warming the Bed
Hiya I found ARNICA tablets a great help helps reduce swelling and eases bruise's
and homeopathic
Best wishes
and homeopathic
Best wishes
Warming the Bed
sorry tried to add pic but failed
Its not in help so how does it work please
Its not in help so how does it work please
Warming the Bed
Could this be the elusive condom that they refer when they say i cant get one to fit
Warming the Bed
Quote by foxylady 123
Really anoys me too, simple anwer BAN all male drivers, result (in my estimation ) accidents cut by at least 80%
Is this so that there are less cars fo women to drive into
:shock: :giveup: before you start nagging me
Warming the Bed
Public smokers are bad enough but it's those who insist on smoking bloody great big cigars in Restaurants
For agreeing to almost every thing else said in here so far and not saying it first
For agreeing to almost every thing else said in here so far and not saying it first
Warming the Bed
1st rule of the raod don't try the dartford crossing at 5o'clock on a friday :shock:
Warming the Bed
When I was taught to drive I was told that there is only one driving lane and two overtaking lanes on a motorway
Not SLOW, MEDIUM & FAST lanes Theres your problem if people think they can only drive at certain speeds in certain lanes!! thats why they all do 50 in the middle lane :lol:
Not SLOW, MEDIUM & FAST lanes
Theres your problem if people think they can only drive at certain speeds in certain lanes!! thats why they all do 50 in the middle lane :lol:
Warming the Bed
It's not as rare as you think there are or has been a gang of 14-16 yo doing this for months at the blue water shopping centre. always picking on the young, the old or Vulnerable.
They did this to my son's friends 12yo sister causing a black eye!!
There first big mistake as my son her brother and some frinds also happened to be there at the time (his friends are local to the area slappers were not) they rang other friends chased them out of the complex and beat the crap out of them
I’m not usually a vigilante but that’s 8+ happy slappers slapped and well deserved they won’t be back
They did this to my son's friends 12yo sister causing a black eye!!
There first big mistake as my son her brother and some frinds also happened to be there at the time (his friends are local to the area slappers were not) they rang other friends chased them out of the complex and beat the crap out of them
I’m not usually a vigilante but that’s 8+ happy slappers slapped and well deserved they won’t be back
Warming the Bed
Could a big part of the problem be that when new poster post a subject thats been posted before they are told to search title first, as we've been there done that.
But when you hit search and see 15+ pages to refer to with that word or phrase included.
Then you start reading the thread only to dicover that after 3-4 post on the subject the old gaurd have hijacked it and started talking utter gibberish with no relevance to the posted subject ( you know who you are) or just qoutes with emoticons
So maybe they are led by the example you refer them to as to forum etiquette in S/H
It also make for a very limited subject matter to post on
As we are masters of our own destiny I find the best control is yourself if the subject matter is pointless ignore it and it will go away. But to post in it and post about it to complain only keeps it alive.
p.s I’m getting very opinionated lately must be this bloody forum
But when you hit search and see 15+ pages to refer to with that word or phrase included.
Then you start reading the thread only to dicover that after 3-4 post on the subject the old gaurd have hijacked it and started talking utter gibberish with no relevance to the posted subject ( you know who you are) or just qoutes with emoticons
So maybe they are led by the example you refer them to as to forum etiquette in S/H
It also make for a very limited subject matter to post on
As we are masters of our own destiny I find the best control is yourself if the subject matter is pointless ignore it and it will go away. But to post in it and post about it to complain only keeps it alive.
p.s I’m getting very opinionated lately must be this bloody forum
Warming the Bed
Its got to be my wirles broadband router upto 5 computers on line one fee couldn't be better
Not that i've got 5 computers
Not that i've got 5 computers
Warming the Bed
In my case when i left i paid mortgage all bills on standing order had my children 3 days a week including weekends took nothing from the house except clothes and she still wasn't satisfied.
If i gave them money for new clothes when asked she would spend a fraction on them rest on her self. When i bought the items instead she'd return them to the shops for refunds
And she would still run me down
So in short if they are that way inclined your never be free of it
My solution got custody of my children soon shuts them up !!!!!
If i gave them money for new clothes when asked she would spend a fraction on them rest on her self. When i bought the items instead she'd return them to the shops for refunds
And she would still run me down
So in short if they are that way inclined your never be free of it
My solution got custody of my children soon shuts them up !!!!!
Warming the Bed
As a trained & registered Body Piercer I would like to add the following
There is a EU Nickel Directive 76/769/EEC & 94/27EC with regard to suitable jewellery for Initial Piercings and any reputable Body Piercer will follow these guidelines.
Before having any piercing done you should research that piercing possible complications likelihood or scaring etc. You should also research the body piercer/ Studio where you intend on having it done.
This should include a tour of treatment areas the area where the sterilisation of jewellery is carried out and a discussion on procedure and aftercare. Ask to see there local Environmental Health Dept Registration/ license, check that the name corresponds to the person who will be carrying out the piercing.
If they can not spare the time prior to the piercing just consider the aftercare they will offer
There is a very informative book available written by Mark Eames titled BODY PIERCING ‘does it hurt’ Published by NilteN Publications. ISBN 0-9541138-0-2
If you have trouble obtaining it please pm me and i will check availability or obtain a copy for you the RRP is
This is a complete illustrated guide to body piercing and covers methods, positioning, aftercare, healing & complications armed with the knowledge contained in this book you will be able to make informed decisions about piercing and weed out the untrained or just badly trained piercer.
Arnica Tablets are very good for use after tongue piercing as they are natural and help reduce swelling and bruising
SALT only natural SEA SALT should be used in the aftercare of piercing’s some table salts contain additives that can promote infection such as salt!!
There is a EU Nickel Directive 76/769/EEC & 94/27EC with regard to suitable jewellery for Initial Piercings and any reputable Body Piercer will follow these guidelines.
Before having any piercing done you should research that piercing possible complications likelihood or scaring etc. You should also research the body piercer/ Studio where you intend on having it done.
This should include a tour of treatment areas the area where the sterilisation of jewellery is carried out and a discussion on procedure and aftercare. Ask to see there local Environmental Health Dept Registration/ license, check that the name corresponds to the person who will be carrying out the piercing.
If they can not spare the time prior to the piercing just consider the aftercare they will offer
There is a very informative book available written by Mark Eames titled BODY PIERCING ‘does it hurt’ Published by NilteN Publications. ISBN 0-9541138-0-2
If you have trouble obtaining it please pm me and i will check availability or obtain a copy for you the RRP is
This is a complete illustrated guide to body piercing and covers methods, positioning, aftercare, healing & complications armed with the knowledge contained in this book you will be able to make informed decisions about piercing and weed out the untrained or just badly trained piercer.
Arnica Tablets are very good for use after tongue piercing as they are natural and help reduce swelling and bruising
SALT only natural SEA SALT should be used in the aftercare of piercing’s some table salts contain additives that can promote infection such as salt!!
Warming the Bed
As one who came here to to seek answers to a personal dilema (Swing or not) (Honest with partner or not)
I found that ther are alot of people that are happy to share ther personal knowledge of similar situations willing to give meaningfull advice and in some instances piont to further place's to seek help/advice
And also happy to give emotional support at times when its most needed and these people I salute you. And you should feel proud for helping & supporting others
It is these people that kept me honest
And make me feel like i am welcome back at any time.
On the other hand there a bunch of narrow minded members who are happy to DIS you just for being here and if my first contact had been with them my life would have gone in another direction completly
One of there pearls of wisdom
Just to Activey/physicaly take part in the forums with out first telling your partner makes you a CHEAT
So if you come across this attitude remember it's not the majorities view
I found that ther are alot of people that are happy to share ther personal knowledge of similar situations willing to give meaningfull advice and in some instances piont to further place's to seek help/advice
And also happy to give emotional support at times when its most needed and these people I salute you. And you should feel proud for helping & supporting others
It is these people that kept me honest
And make me feel like i am welcome back at any time.
On the other hand there a bunch of narrow minded members who are happy to DIS you just for being here and if my first contact had been with them my life would have gone in another direction completly
One of there pearls of wisdom
Just to Activey/physicaly take part in the forums with out first telling your partner makes you a CHEAT
So if you come across this attitude remember it's not the majorities view
Warming the Bed
Yes another well wisher if you dont get what you want today I'm sure a lot here will write to your MP etc in support (Me Included).
I hope you get to fullfeel your destiny
I hope you get to fullfeel your destiny
Warming the Bed
Hey foxy its not just me then!!
Judy I may have misquoted you once but you mention love a lot in your replies So to say you quote love a lot is a fact not a misquote.
I always wondered why the old pros here put the quotes from you in boxes now I know its evidence, so my advice do likewise then they cant edit out bits later!
anyway I have noticed some people have mentioned religion on another post. So i'm off to brand them Heretics and cheats
Silly me thats somebody else's job
Judy I may have misquoted you once but you mention love a lot in your replies So to say you quote love a lot is a fact not a misquote.
I always wondered why the old pros here put the quotes from you in boxes now I know its evidence, so my advice do likewise then they cant edit out bits later!
anyway I have noticed some people have mentioned religion on another post. So i'm off to brand them Heretics and cheats
Silly me thats somebody else's job
