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jellybelly
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 60
UK
Forum
Judy you always qoute love
My mums view of love is to give her self completly to one person both emotionally and physically. but you can love again after the end of a relationship.
My Grans view was that love was to give her self Physically & emotionally to just one person in life and 30 years after his death remained faithfull to that vow
My view of love is variable I loved my first wife in a different way to my current wife
I was divorced for two years prior to meeting my second wife just for the record
Her infidelity but I played my part no victims just life
So what makes your view of love right and theres or mine wrong
I was going to say at least your relationship its one of truth, but my mum would say that cant be love so are you beeing honest with yourself. BUT its not for me to judge and label you by some one elses standards is it now.
My mums view of love is to give her self completly to one person both emotionally and physically. but you can love again after the end of a relationship.
My Grans view was that love was to give her self Physically & emotionally to just one person in life and 30 years after his death remained faithfull to that vow
My view of love is variable I loved my first wife in a different way to my current wife
I was divorced for two years prior to meeting my second wife just for the record
Her infidelity but I played my part no victims just life
So what makes your view of love right and theres or mine wrong
I was going to say at least your relationship its one of truth, but my mum would say that cant be love so are you beeing honest with yourself. BUT its not for me to judge and label you by some one elses standards is it now.
Thank you Calista & Bevntony over the past 7 years we have been thru a lot of treatments etc and I say we as it is our problem.
But the point was that some in here vilify others on a regular basis for being at a different point in there life than them.
Oh yes at the moment they are being there version of honest ,but are not honest enough to admit to get to this point that they to had doubts, not tell the whole truth, explored other things in secret. They have a habit of using a version of love or relationship that suits them as the yard stick to beat us with. I suppose they have there excuses for this "sorry for them it's reasons" for the rest of us it's excuses.
To over simplify if you wear you partners underwear for a couple of weeks without telling them first its less than honest, then you tell them does this make you an honest person?
This is not an excuse for considering it is a Reason
Because I love my wife is a Reason why I consider this
And as to justify there is not a person living or dead that I have to justify myself to just my conscience
And so calista & bevntony it's back to soul searching for me your kind words are appreciated
But the point was that some in here vilify others on a regular basis for being at a different point in there life than them.
Oh yes at the moment they are being there version of honest ,but are not honest enough to admit to get to this point that they to had doubts, not tell the whole truth, explored other things in secret. They have a habit of using a version of love or relationship that suits them as the yard stick to beat us with. I suppose they have there excuses for this "sorry for them it's reasons" for the rest of us it's excuses.
To over simplify if you wear you partners underwear for a couple of weeks without telling them first its less than honest, then you tell them does this make you an honest person?
This is not an excuse for considering it is a Reason
Because I love my wife is a Reason why I consider this
And as to justify there is not a person living or dead that I have to justify myself to just my conscience
And so calista & bevntony it's back to soul searching for me your kind words are appreciated
As usual the same old crap pick a bit add a pointless comment
Judy Says “you can talk to strangers but not wife†I say I did but made depression worse.
Freckledbird says your to blame she is depressed you talked to her about your needs missing the bit where it says mine & her needs
So what is a person supposed to do???
And when and if I do Cheat I will wear my label with Pride knowing i'm not full of Sanctimonious bull shit
Judy Says “you can talk to strangers but not wife†I say I did but made depression worse.
Freckledbird says your to blame she is depressed you talked to her about your needs missing the bit where it says mine & her needs
So what is a person supposed to do???
And when and if I do Cheat I will wear my label with Pride knowing i'm not full of Sanctimonious bull shit
:rotflmao: :doh:As one that has been nagged into rescueing two dogs and buying one puppy so now i have 3 yes 3 dogs and 8years on
Does she walk them as promised no
Does she clean up after them as promised no
Feed them no
So Mr balliff dont do it no way no how its all lies
But my revenge today just bought some dog clippers and going toturn them into skinheads
:lol:
Does she walk them as promised no
Does she clean up after them as promised no
Feed them no
So Mr balliff dont do it no way no how its all lies
But my revenge today just bought some dog clippers and going toturn them into skinheads
:lol: Be carefull a lot spy and adware comes with music downloads
Chris Rea cool
Heaven can wait and crying out loud by Meat Loaf are great oldies
But 3 great tracks to wallow in by STAINED are Epiphany, It's Been Awhile & Outside but they always lift you in the end
I think its because when you listen to the lyrics you realise it's not that bad!!!
Chris Rea cool
Heaven can wait and crying out loud by Meat Loaf are great oldies
But 3 great tracks to wallow in by STAINED are Epiphany, It's Been Awhile & Outside but they always lift you in the end
I think its because when you listen to the lyrics you realise it's not that bad!!!
Quote by jellybelly
How many are open about your lifestyle with all of your family and friends? Does this make you deceitful?
I don't tell my family I'm a swinger but then I don't tell my parents I've just had sex with Ian either
However, the majority of our friends do know we are members of a swinging site
:dunno: But every body states that swinging is a lifestyle choice so why so secretive. nobody expects anybody to declare when and who they have had sex with but this is about lifestyle and honesty!!!!
Quote by jellybelly
So we can be Honest and Genuine people if not misunderstood .
You are honest with a bunch of people on a swingers site that mean nothing to you and yet not honest with the wife you love :roll:
I have discussed this with my wife my needs her needs etc and she said she would understand if I where to seek sex elswhere. But this did not stop her going to a deep depression. Lifes not black and white though.
:dunno: Why do we find it ok to cheat at every thing else in life expenses CV etc but fiddelity is a big no no once you cheat at anything you are after all a cheat.
But at the end of the day we all chose who we are going to upfront and honest with and those we aren't for whatever reason we feel is right but it doesn't make us a lesser person than any body alse
He stones and all that. I do notice however in other threads its all about not putting labels on others due to preference Bi Hetro etc etc etc :roll:
As usual people pointing fingers and saying a married man is wrong for not being open with his wife. And in most cases I agree with you.
But how many of you were married in church? Or are just married? The commitment of marriage is a monogamous one (except for certain religions) does this make you Hypocrites?
How many are open about your lifestyle with all of your family and friends? Does this make you deceitful?
As a married man who is considered abhorrent by some of the less than open minded swinging community!!!! Let me give you a different perspective.
My wife started the menopause 7 years ago in her early 40’s and has lost her sex drive completely 3 years ago. This with the depression and low self worth makes for lots of complications. But I love her more than anything but I am only human and can only survive on masturbation for so long.
Choices
Prostitutes With all the risk of STI/STD etc no thank you
Affair. Which can only result is the end of my marriage no TY
One night stands constant lying and deceit STI/STD etc no TY
Ask my wife (and she would say yes) if I can have extra marital sex . Send her into a deep depression and make her feel totally useless probably end our marriage no TY
Swinging occasional meets with open minded people no risk of emotional attachment reduced risk of STI/STD lying and deceit couple of times a year you can see the attraction.
This is my second marriage and my first wife and I used to swing so I am not one of those that believe its alright for me to sleep with your partner but mines sacred and no one else can touch.
So we can be Honest and Genuine people if not misunderstood .
But how many of you were married in church? Or are just married? The commitment of marriage is a monogamous one (except for certain religions) does this make you Hypocrites?
How many are open about your lifestyle with all of your family and friends? Does this make you deceitful?
As a married man who is considered abhorrent by some of the less than open minded swinging community!!!! Let me give you a different perspective.
My wife started the menopause 7 years ago in her early 40’s and has lost her sex drive completely 3 years ago. This with the depression and low self worth makes for lots of complications. But I love her more than anything but I am only human and can only survive on masturbation for so long.
Choices
Prostitutes With all the risk of STI/STD etc no thank you
Affair. Which can only result is the end of my marriage no TY
One night stands constant lying and deceit STI/STD etc no TY
Ask my wife (and she would say yes) if I can have extra marital sex . Send her into a deep depression and make her feel totally useless probably end our marriage no TY
Swinging occasional meets with open minded people no risk of emotional attachment reduced risk of STI/STD lying and deceit couple of times a year you can see the attraction.
This is my second marriage and my first wife and I used to swing so I am not one of those that believe its alright for me to sleep with your partner but mines sacred and no one else can touch.
So we can be Honest and Genuine people if not misunderstood .
My wifes away for the W/E back on monday,
So what do I do ?
Try to arrange a meet NO
Arrange to go out with friends NO
Stuff my self full of Garlic, Spicy and oniony food Yes
Now is that perverted or what and now its hot my pores stink so much I cant stand beeing near my self.
Do i need help or what
So what do I do ?
Try to arrange a meet NO
Arrange to go out with friends NO
Stuff my self full of Garlic, Spicy and oniony food Yes
Now is that perverted or what and now its hot my pores stink so much I cant stand beeing near my self.
Do i need help or what
This is a long one so sorry but please read on.
There is a lot of negative feed back here Newbies Vs Oldbies. And it mostly comes from unsuccessful SINGLE (Married) men who think that all they have to do is log on reply to a few adds and hey there’s a queue for them GET REAL after all they are all Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise look a likes, and get this if they are looking for Pitt sorry Cruise your out of luck!!!
Me I’m a married man and consider myself a Newbie registered for about 6 months BUT I haven’t contributed much during that time. Me I’m just another one of the 20,000+ members and I’m not that special average in every way so I know why I’m not getting to meet others that’s reality.
So if you want to meet people how do you do it its simple be honest and if you are single you wont find the following to difficult
1. Get known in the forums
2. Get known in the chat rooms
3. Get invited to SOCIAL gatherings and bother to turn up and remember its social so do not expect an orgy but expect to go home as you arrived alone, but with the knowledge people have got to know you a little bit better, and with time will allow you into there lives.
4. Respect it if people don’t pick you they have there reasons although you may not agree its there prerogative.
5. Understand that these people have fulfilling sex lives and do this out of choice not need and can afford to be choosey. Its you that is in need.
As for them killing the threads yes some times its confusing and is more akin to the chat room, but its no different from meeting up with friends after a couple of weeks and there’s a new in joke grin and bear it.
MODS another area of complaint but hey I’ve always found them Fair, Humorous & Honest what more can you ask for.
So in conclusion if you don’t like it you wont be missed
There is a lot of negative feed back here Newbies Vs Oldbies. And it mostly comes from unsuccessful SINGLE (Married) men who think that all they have to do is log on reply to a few adds and hey there’s a queue for them GET REAL after all they are all Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise look a likes, and get this if they are looking for Pitt sorry Cruise your out of luck!!!
Me I’m a married man and consider myself a Newbie registered for about 6 months BUT I haven’t contributed much during that time. Me I’m just another one of the 20,000+ members and I’m not that special average in every way so I know why I’m not getting to meet others that’s reality.
So if you want to meet people how do you do it its simple be honest and if you are single you wont find the following to difficult
1. Get known in the forums
2. Get known in the chat rooms
3. Get invited to SOCIAL gatherings and bother to turn up and remember its social so do not expect an orgy but expect to go home as you arrived alone, but with the knowledge people have got to know you a little bit better, and with time will allow you into there lives.
4. Respect it if people don’t pick you they have there reasons although you may not agree its there prerogative.
5. Understand that these people have fulfilling sex lives and do this out of choice not need and can afford to be choosey. Its you that is in need.
As for them killing the threads yes some times its confusing and is more akin to the chat room, but its no different from meeting up with friends after a couple of weeks and there’s a new in joke grin and bear it.
MODS another area of complaint but hey I’ve always found them Fair, Humorous & Honest what more can you ask for.
So in conclusion if you don’t like it you wont be missed
Sorry to hear Jess but as you know the world is full of annoying little jerks, but you will find nothing but support and understanding from within this community.
Hold your head up and say who cares you have an understanding of life they will never know and how sad are they
Q. Why where they on S/H are they a little bit hypercritical be sure to mention this when questioned turn it around a little
Hold your head up and say who cares you have an understanding of life they will never know and how sad are they
Q. Why where they on S/H are they a little bit hypercritical be sure to mention this when questioned turn it around a little
Hey ggupt if there are racist here report them! other wise dont let every day paranoia creep un to this chilled envorionment
Also notice when you post an add you draw attention to it here
mods please put in lets meetup or lock it ( so sorry mods but I'm a balding fattening middle adged man that no one wants do i cry hairist fatist or ageist)!!!
Also notice when you post an add you draw attention to it here
mods please put in lets meetup or lock it ( so sorry mods but I'm a balding fattening middle adged man that no one wants do i cry hairist fatist or ageist)!!!