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kristof
Over 90 days ago
Male

Forum

wayy down, and watch for those lil prongs stickin out the dirt as well
Kris ( ex sapper )
lol @ scandal
yeah I had freckles, bloody eck did I ever, nowdays they kinda are something I look for, not with hatree but cuz like red hair I find em a turn on
I know. I am totally wacked smile
Ice old boy, just claim that you have taken to heart the desperate please of the poor lovers for whom your hair was becoming a problem, they said it was slowing you down, now the smooth sleek shiney model can cut thru the air so much faster, reaching far greater speeds when bobbing up and down and burying itself between the legs of a lucky recipitent :thumbup:
well it dont really work, but sure is fun as the ladies apparently all were raised in Missouri and keep on saying "Show Me" biggrin
Be Happeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
biggrin :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
dunno where yo find em, but keep on finding em biggrin
its something that always happens, wake up felling sad and dopy, look on the forums start feling happy and cheerful again, then suddenly realise I aint even feeling sleepy anymore but I am wide awake and drinking koffie
And its all thanks to the craziest bunch of looney toons around, my god how did I live before Swinging Heaven smile
Quote by marmalaid
Agreed, in fact, it almost turns me on now, only almost though wink

loolll. I wasnt sure then whether to get ready to run, drop to my knees and open my mouth or just stand there with that shocked "Rabbit in car headlight in middle of night" look on my face flipa bolt
getting back on track again, thanks worship Steph :worship: for being ooohhhhh sooo kind, and thanks to :thumbup: Marmalaid :thumbup: for capturing a younger me in the first place. Aint it amazing what a decent camera and daylaight can do when you want to take a picture :wink:
all I have to do now is to make sure Trading Standards cant do me for "Misrepresentation of Goods" rotflmao
I am not the first, doubt I will be the last
Vix hun,
happy birthday and many more to come
with respects from me I hand to thee thjis simple token :rose:
hope your days been good, I know your life will be
Kris
Quote by PoloLady
This one is dedicated to the pick-pocketing bastard in Camden…
I want to be alone with you
To make my dream come true
I dream of being somewhere quiet
So I can see things through
I want to be alone with you
And you tied up with rope
I’d have a bag of bits and bobs
Oh, for this I dearly hope
I want to be alone with you
You’re tied and can’t escape
I’d start by poking both your eyes
Then cover them in tape
I want to be alone with you
You stinking little shit
I want to take your shoes off
And then get the blow-torch lit
I want to be alone with you
After burning off your toes
I’d get a pair of pliers
And start working on your nose
I want to be alone with you
I am hoping you will come
So I can use a sledgehammer to get
A pineapple up your bum
I want to be alone with you
Whether female or a bloke
I really don’t care what you are
If I can see your fingers broke
I want to be alone with you
Now what else is in my bag
Maybe I should use you neck
For putting out my fag
I want to be alone with you
There’s so much I would gain
From drilling both your kneecaps
And causing you such pain
I want to be alone with you
But then I’d get into trouble
So hope you’re caught by some real hard cunt
Who’ll be do all this double

gawddd, remind me NOT to upset you hun, you live wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy to close for me to risk that smile
eveyb dy is entitled t makes s me mistakes, in this cas I can h ld my hand n heart and blame the keyb ard which has decided that the letter is n l nger an pti n
oooooops redface
Quote by fruity1976
We are all famous!!! Im in google! biggrin
Ima googlebrity!! lol Now you must all kiss my feet and lick my pussy!!! :twisted:

can I start with pussy and work down?
Quote by Tania
Wow Kristof!
Well done man! Can we all request samples of Tingle? Do they come in supersize? Are they any good to lick? You must ask them more questions. biggrin
10/10 for initiative!
kiss

well I will find out how good they are once they arrive :P
my report will arrive as soon as they do :D
nice sentiment hun
/me walks away and suddenly bends over to
pick up a £1 coin
GOTCHA biggrin
sit back, relax, put your feet up and start to reading
after the first few minutes of breathless anticipation you will find us all just genuine laughter lovers who also enjoy our fun and games, so be happy, have a good laught, and do as much or as little as you feel like smile
well I aint had a chance to see the oceans 12 yet, but both the original rat pack and the clloney version are good, hope to be downloading the new 12 as soon as I finish putting my other comp back together again
Dear Kristof,
Thank you for your e-mail message regarding Durex.
As we have not carried out any tests involving condoms and toothpaste
we
can not really comment with regard to the toothpaste affecting the
condom
in any way. However you might be interested in a new Durex condom -
Tingle. These condoms are coated in a special lubricant (very minty!),
which creates a tingling sensation, heightening stimulation for both
partners.
If you would like us to send you a sample of Tingle condoms please send
me
your postal address together with your date of birth.
Thank you once again for taking the time to contact us.
Regards
Julie Ryding
Consumer Relations

as I promiised here is the reply smile
hello there and welcome to our not so dusty corner of the world, that was a great opening speech so you guys should find yourselves fitting right in here
have fun, be happy smile
Quote by towntart
some of you may no i'm having a gang bang on and hopefully cumming on friday but does anyone know if some guys f**k me more than once in that night can i count him more than once.
is it how many diferent guys i have or the amount of c**k i have.
be interesting to measure it in yards of c**k . :idea:

ehhhh
well, ermmm pass on the does it count twice bit, no idea, and google didnt come up with anything at all helpfull either
add me name as a volunteer tho, anything to keep a good lady happy smile
Quote by PoloLady
May I welcome you and commend you on the bravery of your declaration - it took me ages to admit I lived in Leicester lol

lol PL, whats wrong with Leicester, its a great place, erm, well maybe, ummm .... ahhh, bloody eck, now I do feel like crud
hmmm, have to combine gene hackaman and danny devito, short, ugly but funny at times and just down right bloody foolish at others
The worst is the first few weeks, if you let yourself get to feeling down, it becomes habit, becomes as comfortable as your faverate trainers.
Make plans for things YOU wan to do, at times to suit you
Dont do as I did, sit at home on the carpet ( because she took everything that wasnt nailed down ) wallowing in self pity, and for gods sake dont go rushing into another long term relationship before you have recovered from this one, I did, I spent almost 9 years in a second relationship that was wrong for me for herand even more wrong for the kids, all because of the rebound effect. That caused both my new partner my family and myself a load of heartache and upset when finally it was laid to rest.
Be yourself, dont allow yourself to fall into the trap of self pity, I know its easier said than done, but its important. Take your time to get your mind trully sorted out, go out, date, have fun. Dont aim for a new longteerm relationship until you are settled in your own mind, I know the empty spot next to you is bloody awful, having nobody around when you feel down is hellish, but it does get easier, never %100 comfortable, but easier. Spend some time on YOU. get your mind clear. Meet people and have fun. Dont rush in. Take your time, and it will all come right
Quote by Vix
I was gonna send a PM to Marya about this, then thought "No, that's cowardly". Here's why:
You know me, I would probably be expected to come into a thread like this and say something along the lines of "Well, if they did it to me, or if I saw them do it to someone else, I'd rip their head off and shit down their neck!"
Truth be told, if it happened to me, I'd be one of the women that thinks "Well, look at how I dress and behave. It's to be expected'"
Now, I know that that is so much bollox, but in a situation like this, that would be my reaction. I would probably do nothing. In fact, I doubt I'd be brave enough to even 'complain' the day after. Or ever.

I personally dont give a flying f**k how a man or woman is dressed or behaves, if somebody is behaving in a unwanted and unwelcome manner then they need to be reminded and or booted out. We all know that we would see people in perhaps skanty/provocative outfits, so what, its called MANNERS to behqave yourself. I know that some people, male and female alike are very wary of "rocking the boat" in some circumstances, I am one of theose people, I know that it being my 1st munch I would have felt awkward about making a complain myself so I can sypathise with those who felt that they couldnt speak out at the time, but please, please if it ever happens again, let the organiser know. Its sounding as though these two idiots were counting on the fact that nobody would speak up to get away with what inmy mind was simply sexual harrasment/assualt.
I know the Steph and Voddy did their utmost to make everything go with a swing ( no pun intended ) and I hate to think that two pr**ks like these could have dented the great fun everybody was having.
Quote by jomu
The other person was probably only after a quick shag...you seem to want a relationship...most of the people I know in this scene only WANT a quick shag, and rarely meet more than once or twice.
It's called life, I think !

Sorry mate, cant agree
I have read through so many threads since joining up that admittedly they do tend to blur a bit, but the underlying attitude is of lot of friends who enjoy life and sharing friendships
If it was a case of "do it once or twice and fuckit off" then whty do so many repeat it again and again, at munches and at other times?
SexyJess personally I reckon you caught a guy with one of 3 probs A,the FFFF type who only want a one of and aint willing to be honest about that (good riddence to them, , B, the sudden "what have I done" guilt trip caused by a g/f or wife at home ) or C, his cock dropped of because you worked him so hard, cuz was it me I would have been back so fast the smell of burning rubber would be coming from my shoes smile
As MikeNorth said, you are allowed to contact him yourself nowdays, just a quick PM should do the trick, if he dont reply, forget the loser. Dont let somebody else's apparent lack of curtesy screw your head up.
Put it behind you hun, get out there and enjoy yourself, on your terms and conditions.
Quote by MQ
Bastards, what are these pathetic arseholes thinking when they do stuff like this? It's bloody sickening, at least they could do society a favour by hacking the sites which are nasty and illegal instead of those where people are trying to do some good in this world. I just hope they are never faced with a terrible disability because if they do this to the people who are trying to make a difference, there will be nobody to help them in their hour of need. mad

What attack a illegal and nasty site, that would be pissing on their own front doors ffs
Thgese tossers dont offend their own kind, they just take perverse pleasure in attacking the good guys
Vix wish I could help you hun, I spoke to some friends in the hackin game and they are takin a look for info, but they admitted its bloody hard to track a guy down unless you are willing to put time and money into it
MQ, I agree with you hee, I never would wish such a thing on anybody, but these buggers could soon become an exception to the rule
I can sympathise mate, going through it myself at the minute, the patches work ok, the urge to smoke has almost left, but the fags aint my prob unfortunatly, its blasted anti depression meds that slow things down for me, thank god for fingers and tongues which can take up the slack when the mind is willing and the body is weak smile Then again as I like to give more than I recieve, I cant complain, and by the return invites I get neither do the ladies biggrin
Now that my head is again working straight which it wasnt when I posted my firts thankyou for the munch on this thread, now I think I am capable of saying it properly
!st Steph and Voddy, you 2 did marvels, the 2 venues were bloody great and I for one, was very very pleased with everything that had been arranged. I know thats just the same that been said already, and by newbies as well as older more seasoned munchers, but hey, it was a fantastic night.
Steph and Voddy made me feel so welcome from the outset, as soon as I introduced myself at the bowling in fact. Still cant get over how Steph, FrogertheDragon and dreamerhelen couldnt believe it was me though, I didntrealise that my avatar made me look like an OLD man until they said so "you cant be kristof, you look nothing like the OLD man in your avatar" were the kind words said lol:
Gailen, thanks for being one of the first to welcome me, as was also MedicOne and Chamoix.
Dave_Notts, Love_Commando great guys who made me feel right at home, Vicky_UK who has amongst the greatest asses its ever been my pleasure to grope biggrin JucyLucy whose feet I hope are feeling better after those 7" heels she chose to wear and then needed to walk a half mile between venues in them rotflmao Nipsey who though she seemed to give me the evil eye at first was a great lady with a wicked laugh and humour, Essex_Lady for being even sexier in the flesh than her avatar suggestr. Fabio the man moutain, he walked by and the skies darkend as he blocked the light, but such a soft spoken nice guy, friendly with the centiped across his lip and the biggest grin I have seen in a long time ( and that was before the afters party as well ) who truly chose an apt handle. Mancuso, Mr WelcomeEverywhere... I expected something so different, some greek god or something, instead a normal guy with a massive and BlondeSlave, a lovely couple. Demon and PeBbLes a great couple who beat Voddy and me to that campervan for the night leaving my ass hanging of the couch in the dungeon in the few brief monents I was still. i know there are many more, i met everybody who was at the munch, i know I did, but the names and faces just started to blur after the 1st 50 or so people. One who did stick in mind though was Marmalaid, OMG, when you suddenly appeared in that lil pink outfit I almost wet myself with laughter, my god man, you are a party creature for sure ( gotta make a fuss here seeing as he took a real good photo of me for use as my avatar :lol: )
Again many many thanks to Steph for starting the idea of the munch and for permitting me as a newbie to attend both it and the afters party, and to Voddy for being such a massive co host and for giving me a hell of a night to remember at the afters party. ( Voddy you may be a unasuming lady, but you are ALL WOMAN and thats a fact )
To those of you who I have not mentioned, please forgive my lack of manners, but you all merged into such a happy laughing crowd and now its going to take a while to seperate names and faces sad
I cant wait for the next munch I have the cash and the invite to attend smile
Quote by well_busty_babe
kristof
roses are red
violets are blue
whens our next munch
as i want you too

oooohhh
I wont ask who sent it wbb, I think I may already know :P
hmmmm
well if they are as good as the present lot, they wil be good
I always have condoms with me, usually 4 plus.
Stands to reason dont it, yeah if the chance of a full blown shag comes up well I will take it.
I value my health, I carry a condom,
If I have full (penetrative) sex with somebody I dont know am I fool enough to lose my health to a STD, uhuhuhhhhhh no way jose
so for those of you lazy enough, stupid enough or just plain feckin wacked out enough not to give a damm or carry a condom....... Think Safe