Quote by TamworthGuy
cud see it coming tho...
Lissa & Sassy. Could this be the start of a beautiful friendship?!!!
PS Lissa, is that an SV in your avatar?
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littlemee
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 60
UK
Forum
Orgasminator
A Christmas thread so it should be a happy thread so don't read this if you wanna stay happy!!!
I'm dreading this Chrimbo.
First one on my own ever.
Only lived in Nottingham for a few months and 150 miles from family & friends in London.
My little boy is in Derbyshire and this is only his 3rd one so really wanna see his little face on Christmas morning but still don't know if I will.
No idea where I'll be or what I'm gonna be doing.
Most of it is in the hands of my ex.
Looking forward to the works party though!!!
:cheers: :beer: :bounce:
I'm dreading this Chrimbo.
First one on my own ever.
Only lived in Nottingham for a few months and 150 miles from family & friends in London.
My little boy is in Derbyshire and this is only his 3rd one so really wanna see his little face on Christmas morning but still don't know if I will.
No idea where I'll be or what I'm gonna be doing.
Most of it is in the hands of my ex.
Looking forward to the works party though!!!
:cheers: :beer: :bounce: 
Orgasminator
Quote by Sassy-Seren
Nice one Ricky :thumbup:
Ooops! How rude of me.
I forgot to add.......
:happy: for ricky & his partner (whoever she may be).
Which has made me think........why is it always the bloke that posts these sort of threads?
Or have I just missed all the ladies announcing they have just lost their swinging virginity?
Because we're a bit more discreet perhaps? :giggle:
Good on yer, ricky :thumbup:
"a BIT more discrete"!!! Now there's an understatement.
Quote by mostlycurious
Nice one Ricky :thumbup:
Ooops! How rude of me.
I forgot to add.......
:happy: for ricky & his partner (whoever she may be).
Which has made me think........why is it always the bloke that posts these sort of threads?
Or have I just missed all the ladies announcing they have just lost their swinging virginity?
maybe it's a man thing that they feel the need to brag or maybe it's that a woman can be content with a wry smile and the knowledge that it happened.
Contentidness is indeed a very wry smile!!!
Orgasminator
Quote by makaveli69
Nice one Ricky :thumbup:
Ooops! How rude of me.
I forgot to add.......
:happy: for ricky & his partner (whoever she may be).
Which has made me think........why is it always the bloke that posts these sort of threads?
Or have I just missed all the ladies announcing they have just lost their swinging virginity?
Orgasminator
Quote by ricky13
i have just got back from my first meeting with a very nice lady in a hotel
i just did not no how to go about this but after the ice was broken and a nice meal it all fell into place.
both left happy and well you no :P
Hotel?
Meal?
So that's where I'm going wrong!!! :idea:
I guess pillion on me bike & a bag of chips isn't the way to get into a ladies pants then.
Perhaps I'd better re-think my strategy.
Orgasminator
Quote by MikeNorth
Blokes that are clean shaven except for that tuft of fluff just under their bottom lip!!!
What is THAT all about?!!!
Apparently that tuft is known as a lady pleaser.
So ladies...just to expand (& slightly hijack the thread for a moment)....does it work?
Personally, most of the ladies I have managed to get THAT close to my chin have preferred it to be clean shaven. Stubble rash down there can be quite unpleasant, apparently!!!
Orgasminator
Quote by redangel
We get comments like this quite often where I work. The simple answer is that some dogs enjoy dressing up, and some don't!!!
My doggy loves dressing in t-shirts and coats. But refuses to wear a baseball cap, or doggy goggles - yes they do exsist!!!
So I dont make her wear them. Aslong as the best interests of the dogs are always upheld, I think its all good fun.
This coming from the person holding a dog fashion show next weekend!!!
Now THAT is worrying red!!!
Orgasminator
Quote by Babe-n-a-biker
My first one was a great one.Thanks for the thread hope you've got responses you were looking for.
I've heard of Buy One Get One Free but not like this!!!
Orgasminator
Quote by sheddy
See this vision of beauty here
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/images/avatars/2395622103.jpg
I quite don't know how to break it to people and prehaps I shouldn't (but when has that ever stopped me) ......................Posh Kate eats her bogies Now she has some odd habits and I've always suspected her of this heighnous crime but she has always denied it untill just when I've caught her red handed (or green fingered if you like
Now prehaps I'm alone here but I can't recall ever doing it as a child let alone an adult and I am now off to scrub my lips after realising in the past I have kissed a bogie eater :shock:
PoshKate, there seems to be no reply from the defence regarding these accusations.
I'm sure the rest of the Cafe would like to hear YOUR side of these absurd allegations.
Are you guilty as charged or would you like to plea any sort of mitigating circumstances?
Was it some radical new diet you'd read about?
Perhaps it was just a one-off fascination into what they actually tasted like?
Or maybe Sheddy's accusations had become too much so you thought "I've been accused of it so I might as well do it"!!!
Or are you a serial bogie eater and would like to take this opportunity to spread the word?!!!
Orgasminator
Quote by redangel
Now this one I find strangely alluring!!!
I really hope you mean the costume!!!!
Not the dachhy, because that would be really worrying!!
Errrr, yes, errrr, of course I meant the costume.
What else would I mean? Of course, errrrrr, that would be very worrying, errrrr, yes!!!
:doh: Me and my big mouth. Is that my secret fetish out?!!!!!
Orgasminator
Quote by PoloLady
It is just wrong! It doesn't need a reason why it is wrong - it just is.
I am sure I will think of other things which are just wrong - but in the meantime - what can you think of?
Blokes that are clean shaven except for that tuft of fluff just under their bottom lip!!!
What is THAT all about?!!!
Orgasminator
Quote by redangel
My biggest customer for dog fancy dress, is a Hells Angel, who has a chihaua!! Mind you, I really wouldn't want to argue with him. Lovley as he is!!! He looks quite scary on the outside!!!
Hell's Angels are some of the biggest softies going.
Most of them do "a lot of good wurk fu chaaaridy mate"!!!
Don't be fooled by the bad press. It's mainly boll*cks.
Orgasminator
Quote by SexySara
What??? ALL night??
Stay hard all night? No problem.
I regularly go to sleep with a hard on (especially after I've just logged off this site) and when I wake up in the morning I nearly always have a stiffy. Therefore I presume it's been like that all night. :sleeping:
Now all I have to do is stay awake all night.
Orgasminator
Quote by racheyxxI've read so I thought I'd better post.
hey come on peep slots of u reading , not many posting!!!!!!
The questions been answered so what can I say?..........
...........except......
Quote by racheyxx
come tell me pls xxxxx i need ideas!!! at the end of the day not sure what it is !!
me being dumb again !!!ops: :oops:
:oops:
........you're not "dumb" rachey, just sweet, naive & innocent. That'll soon change when you start fraternising with the sort of characters you get on this depraved site.
Have fun rachey & as a single bloke I promise not to PM, wink or whisper to you.
That's one less for you to worry about anyway. Only a few thousand others to go!!!
Good luck!!! Orgasminator
Quote by varca
Georgia Satellites - Keep your hands to yourself
Yay, that reminds me, I've got some of their stuff on vinyl somewhere. Gonna have to dig it out. 'Battleship Chains'!!!
'....Can't move my tongue to lick nobody, lick nobody but you....' !!!
Quote by varca
Got the new Iron Maiden album on in the background tonight, trying to stay awake!
Oooh will have to give that a wigging. Not like the good old days tho I guess *sigh* Can't beat "Bring your daughter to the Slaughter" :shock:
No, no, no!!! The OLD days are 'Phantom Of The Opera' & 'The Iron Maiden'!!!
Classix!!!
Orgasminator
Quote by Kiss
Now I'm gonna put on some Rush.
Last weekend I was listening to a brilliant drum solo by Neil Peart that I managed to download. Bloody amazing drummer.
you should get his new drumming dvd, very good.
:bounce: I didn't know he had a DVD out! I will have to write to Father Christmas.
Thanks! :thumbup:
Tell your friends. Let's start a Rush revival.
Or let's be REALLY sad and go to a Rush convention and pretend to be Geddy Lee!!!
:moon: Quote by Sassy-Seren
Nothing Else Matters - Metallica
:thumbup:
Orgasminator
Quote by PoloLady
I just pulled up on the front of my house and realised I needed to get some ciggies. There is a shop no more than 11 doors away from my house - so it is not exactly a long distance trek, but it was raining (I say in my defence). Now I am sat in the car looking at my umbrella (which I keep in the car for situations just like this) and thinking about how much trouble it will be to dry out the brolley and put it back in the car.
So I put the key back in the ignition and drive the 300ft to the shop.
Now I am wondering ... what is the laziest thing I do
What about you?
Quote by varca
Now there's serendipity for you lol.... just thought the exact same thought! Could walk to Sainsbugs to get some cigs... 5 mins max but it's persistantly raining here too!! So what am I going to do?.... get a stop and return taxi!! Good job they know me!!
..........and the link here is lady smokers.
Us non-smoking chaps wouldn't even consider doing anything THIS lazy!!!
