No vino for me tonight- i need at least a pint of irn bru to get rid of my roughness!
you can't beat it!
I think i need to settle down in that jacuzzi and rest my weary body, with a foot and leg rub...anyone offering?!
:twisted:
maz x
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mazandden
Over 90 days ago
Bisexual Female, 43
Straight Male, 48
UK
Forum
Sex God
awww horny poor you!!!!
I'm not entirely sure it's a good idea to go swimming so soon when the wound is still healing though
For certain types of orthopaedic surgery, we generally say that swimming shouldn't be resumed until 6 weeks after stitch removal, to prevent the risk of infection.
Obviously, your wound will be only ickle, and I don't know anything about the protocol for it, but you would assume you could still pick up an infection whilst the wound is still healing with the stitches.
And even though there is chlorine in the water, you get lots of bugs swimming around in there!
Why don't you change the promise to the sauna?!?!
I'm also in need of sick bay- I was doing a promotion night at a hotel last night that involved a last minute dance routine with gymnastics in it, wearing ridiculous heels that i could barely even stand in without wobbling, never mind leap about in!
Anyway, the inevitable happened and i fell tit over arse because my leg gave way during a gymnastics move(but managed to cover up very nicely so noone noticed!)
Anyway, i've really hurt my quads muscle, so i'm hobbling about.
We also ended up not getting to bed until 4, and then i had to get up at 6 and drive an hour and a half back to edinburgh to be in 'proper' work for 8am!!! :shock:
I'm so sore and exhausted and feeling sorry for myself and in need of nursing!
m xxx
I'm not entirely sure it's a good idea to go swimming so soon when the wound is still healing though
For certain types of orthopaedic surgery, we generally say that swimming shouldn't be resumed until 6 weeks after stitch removal, to prevent the risk of infection.
Obviously, your wound will be only ickle, and I don't know anything about the protocol for it, but you would assume you could still pick up an infection whilst the wound is still healing with the stitches.
And even though there is chlorine in the water, you get lots of bugs swimming around in there!
Why don't you change the promise to the sauna?!?!
I'm also in need of sick bay- I was doing a promotion night at a hotel last night that involved a last minute dance routine with gymnastics in it, wearing ridiculous heels that i could barely even stand in without wobbling, never mind leap about in!
Anyway, the inevitable happened and i fell tit over arse because my leg gave way during a gymnastics move(but managed to cover up very nicely so noone noticed!)
Anyway, i've really hurt my quads muscle, so i'm hobbling about.
We also ended up not getting to bed until 4, and then i had to get up at 6 and drive an hour and a half back to edinburgh to be in 'proper' work for 8am!!! :shock:
I'm so sore and exhausted and feeling sorry for myself and in need of nursing!
m xxx
Sex God
Quote by poshkate
Last Saturday night in Manchester ........... Girlies night out!
Sausage and chips bought ..... and sausage dropped on the floor 2 seconds after paying for it ............ YES we picked it up off the pavement ........and ate it! :scared:
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
In Catering (disclaimer - apparently!).. there's a 5 second ruling on things that have dropped on the floor.. ie., pick up within 5 seconds and you're safe, other than that the spours are starting to develop!
I was brought up on the '3 second rule'......if you drop food, it's fine as long as you pick it up in 3 seconds, never done me any harm......
Den always says 'God kissed it, the Devil missed it' for some reason....He will eat anything off the floor, as will my cats, who have even taken to eating orange peel (cats are supposed to hate citrus) all my house plants, and licking plastic bags.
They will manage to eat anything- packaging is not a deterant!
xx
Sex God
Quote by naughtynymphos1
I have to say the best razor i have tried is the Gillette Fusion, they are quite expensive and the blades are a bit pricey too but since i started using mine i have never got a rash or anything and i just use shower gel to shave with, they really do leave you soft and smooth gotta be worth a go :thumbup:
I think that's the one i pinch from den- they are expensive, about a tenner for a pack of 4 replacement blades i'm sure.... but they are good!
Sex God
Quote by mdr2000
another tip- using a little lube on your cock prior to putting on the condom will improve sensitivity.
alternatively have a 'posh wank' regularly with a condom on.. you will get used to the new sensation of having a condom on and it will quickly ensure you are as aroused and sensitive with one on as off.
splendid
Oooo Gonna try that... but whats a 'posh wank'??
lol, a wank with a condom on- that's all it is!!!
Sex God
I will sometimes use a mirror to check i've not missed a bit, but so far haven't ever managed to cut myself in that area until the other day, and that was a 'slipping' incident!
I find it quite easy to shave the 'difficult parts' so long as you stretch the skin a bit, its not as dangerous as you think!!
I find it quite easy to shave the 'difficult parts' so long as you stretch the skin a bit, its not as dangerous as you think!!
Sex God
Awww, i wish i'd read this one sooner! you know when you post something, but you've already decided what you want the answer to be?! 
If dave had been first to say this along with bonedigger, then i'd be munching those breasts just now....
I can't smell chicken as the good stuff would make me feel sick anyway, and i would always think it smelt off....
As for the slimyness, i always think chicken is slimey!
I'm sure it wouldn't have done me any harm, but the pizza was good!
Thanks all- now you can tell me what you all had for dinner!
If dave had been first to say this along with bonedigger, then i'd be munching those breasts just now....I can't smell chicken as the good stuff would make me feel sick anyway, and i would always think it smelt off....
As for the slimyness, i always think chicken is slimey!
I'm sure it wouldn't have done me any harm, but the pizza was good!
Thanks all- now you can tell me what you all had for dinner!
Quote by Dave__Notts
If it is one or two days over the use by date then it shouldn't be a problem as the manufacturers build in a 25% safety factor i.e. if it has 10 day use by date then it should be ok until the 12th or 13th day.
The smell and feel test is the best. If it smells off, bin it. If it feels slimy, bin it. Otherwise just eat it
Dave_Notts
Sex God
Quote by Fragglerocks
my question that the wife was wondering is how do you shave roun the bumhole area, she can manage the other bits but can never do the other,
Hmm, am I gonna get really embarrased saying this?!
I don't seem to have a problem shaving everything off, i think my trick is to either get your leg propped up fairly high, or sit down in the bath/shower, and tilt your hips a bit!
Maybe I can do it ok becuase i'm a gymnast and fairly flexible?!?! lol
Sex God
Don't know about eating, but I once had a shot of some kind of alcohol (flavoured like nail varnish remover and probably at least 99.9%) which had a dead lizard in the bottle....
Kind of like your tequila worms, but wee lizards floating about!!!
Can't say I remember much of the incident due to the high alcohol content!!
Den once tried to eat year old jamaica ginger bread because he thought it would keep in the packet!
Kind of like your tequila worms, but wee lizards floating about!!!
Can't say I remember much of the incident due to the high alcohol content!!
Den once tried to eat year old jamaica ginger bread because he thought it would keep in the packet!
Sex God
Definately not cast iron in the slightest!
And I put myself off it just by looking at it!!
Den would eat anything, he'd probably eat it if it was a week past its date!
The pizza is good, but now i feel minging and i've not had any of the yummy veg now!
Think I'll be going to the gym tomorrow......
And I put myself off it just by looking at it!!
Den would eat anything, he'd probably eat it if it was a week past its date!
The pizza is good, but now i feel minging and i've not had any of the yummy veg now!
Think I'll be going to the gym tomorrow......
Sex God
Hmm, I'm starving and we have some yummy veggies, baked potatoes and corn on the cob, but also a pack of chicken to go with it all- and I really really want the chicken!
The slight problem is the use by date was the 29th, 2 days ago.
I hate the smell of raw meat even if it's fresh so I can't smell it without being sick anyway, so can't do the 'smell test' to see if it's good or bad!
Would you cook and eat it?!!?!
Do i risk a potential sick day tomorrow?! I'm sooo hungry and the veg alone just won't do!It also has to be re-heated when den comes in from the pub....
I fear pizza delivery coming on.....
What did everyone have for dinner tonight??Just to make me more hungry!
m xx
The slight problem is the use by date was the 29th, 2 days ago.
I hate the smell of raw meat even if it's fresh so I can't smell it without being sick anyway, so can't do the 'smell test' to see if it's good or bad!
Would you cook and eat it?!!?!
Do i risk a potential sick day tomorrow?! I'm sooo hungry and the veg alone just won't do!It also has to be re-heated when den comes in from the pub....
I fear pizza delivery coming on.....
What did everyone have for dinner tonight??Just to make me more hungry!
m xx
Sex God
Erm we have!!!
I was a wee bit tipsy in chat one day, and so was a girl I was chatting to....
We both had our webcams on and exchanged numbers, and she jokingly said 'i'll come round and help you finish your wine' so i said 'how long would it take you to get here' and so it went on for about half an hour of 'joking' before we both said 'i'm serious if you are'.
Den had just appeared home from work, when I told him said girl was on her way round!!!!
:shock: :twisted:
Well, we all had a very VERY good night! Bad maz and den!!
Can't see us doing that very often though, I think that was down to good timing etc etc.....
I was a wee bit tipsy in chat one day, and so was a girl I was chatting to....
We both had our webcams on and exchanged numbers, and she jokingly said 'i'll come round and help you finish your wine' so i said 'how long would it take you to get here' and so it went on for about half an hour of 'joking' before we both said 'i'm serious if you are'.
Den had just appeared home from work, when I told him said girl was on her way round!!!!
:shock: :twisted:
Well, we all had a very VERY good night! Bad maz and den!!
Can't see us doing that very often though, I think that was down to good timing etc etc.....
Sex God
Howdy, and welcome from the Scottish quarter!!
You could always think about posting a pic and keeping it in your private gallery, that way you don't have to send it out to anyone and it stays safe on the site- all you do is invite people to view it, it will only be seen by the people you choose to invite! hint hint :twisted:
You can blur your face out too (easy as an extras member, but otherwise just use paint before you upload it!)
M xx
You could always think about posting a pic and keeping it in your private gallery, that way you don't have to send it out to anyone and it stays safe on the site- all you do is invite people to view it, it will only be seen by the people you choose to invite! hint hint :twisted:
You can blur your face out too (easy as an extras member, but otherwise just use paint before you upload it!)
M xx
Sex God
I think I have the thickest hairs on the planet- they never budge with hair removal creme!
I shave every time i have a shower (which is normally at least twice a day) and I always use baby oil and one of dens mac 2000 or whatever number they're up to now- the one with the 4 blades that vibrates etc etc.
I get shouted at whenever he goes to shave his face (which isn't as often as i shave my lady garden!
I shave everything off, and never a problem, no rash, no spots, no ingrown hairs and shaving all the time isn't a bother at all!
m xx
PS, still, like everyone has said- having someone else do it is much more enjoyable!!!
:twisted:
I shave every time i have a shower (which is normally at least twice a day) and I always use baby oil and one of dens mac 2000 or whatever number they're up to now- the one with the 4 blades that vibrates etc etc.
I get shouted at whenever he goes to shave his face (which isn't as often as i shave my lady garden!
I shave everything off, and never a problem, no rash, no spots, no ingrown hairs and shaving all the time isn't a bother at all!
m xx
PS, still, like everyone has said- having someone else do it is much more enjoyable!!!
:twisted:
Sex God
Quote by Corrie2007
I believe you can make things happen in your life - both good or bad. I do both all the time and I know it always fascintaes me how when you are in a positive confident frame of mind you become capable of doing anything.
If you believe that cosmic ordering helps thats great but being positive in your outlook and making other people feel good about themselves works for me
:thumbup:
This definately rings true with me!
the more you tell yourselves things can happen, the more likely they are to, as the more likely you are to get off your ass and do something about it!
m xx
Sex God
Quote by hornyinslough
I write a goal/wish list every so often- and i've always got what i wished for in some way or another...
Perhaps its down to things that maybe subconciously, you know could potentially happen for you, but it's not until you make that first step to change that things do, and maybe in your case that first step was changing your profile and believing that it was possible to find your partner?????
m xx
I think you're absolutely right Maz, changing my profile did make my mind more open to the idea whereas before I was still maybe not quite admitting it. I might start making more wish lists and see if it works as much as yours have
For Phil: "I won't be dating in vanilla-land but am open to dating a fellow swinger with a view to a LTR if the right person comes along"
Go on, I dare you all to try it!
I usually write them down on a wee crib card that will fit in my wallet- but you have to be very specific, obviously not too over the top, for instance, rather than 'i want to win the lottery in june' 'I want to have enough money by the summer to go away on a good holiday'.
Well, we just got our bank charges back!!
The first time someone told me to do this, she said her friend had wished for 'a racing green sports car'
Anyway, that day she happened to buy a classified ads paper that she didn't normally buy, and in it, a crazed wife who had just caught her husband cheating, had put his racing green coloured porshe up for sale for £100!
Well, if you believe that, you may believe anything , but you never know!!!
m xx
Sex God
Just to re-iterate, you should NEVER use the blood doner tests to check if you have an infection- they actually say this in their patient hand out.
If you have any concerns that you may have some kind of infection, STD etc, then you certainly shoulnd't be giving blood- you should be getting yourself along to your docs/GUM clinic!
M xx
If you have any concerns that you may have some kind of infection, STD etc, then you certainly shoulnd't be giving blood- you should be getting yourself along to your docs/GUM clinic!
M xx
Sex God
Quote by poshkate
Yep full body massage for me too
The only trouble is that now I know I am bi and don't just suspect it the couple of times I have had a massage I have found it quite hard to keep my mind from straying as one of my many fantasises is that I get a massage that is taken much further than expected
This is DEFINATELY one of my fantasies as
well!!!!
m xx
I think we should arrange something ladies :twisted:
Well, you're team masseuse!!!!! :twisted: :twisted:
Sex God
I like the old 'scuse me, i've lost my phone number can i borrow yours' or 'if I told you you had a sexy body, would you hold it against me?' but I don't think it would ever result in pulling!
The best (or worst!) chat up line ever, was whispered in my ear by a massive american basketball player....
'Baby, I'd love to marinade them pussy lips of yours in my mouth'
Marinade?!?!?! I was on the floor pissing myself laughing at that, the first thing it made me do was find my friends and tell them!
And no, he didn't get a shag!
:giggle:
m xx
The best (or worst!) chat up line ever, was whispered in my ear by a massive american basketball player....
'Baby, I'd love to marinade them pussy lips of yours in my mouth'
Marinade?!?!?! I was on the floor pissing myself laughing at that, the first thing it made me do was find my friends and tell them!
And no, he didn't get a shag!
:giggle:
m xx
Sex God
Quote by lizalea
i think there must be a god
reason for thinking that is really quiet simple
with no thought of religion and only lustfull thoughts in head at some point during sex i shout out "oh my god"
some times many times :shock:
just my thoughts on the matter lol
I thought that when I saw your avatar!
Wow! :shock: :twisted:
Welcome to the forum!!
m xx
uch: :crazy: 
Sex God
Quote by Shaz_n_Tony
For Tony i like him Masterful as i am a sub anyway :twisted:
For swinging partners neither masterful or sub, i like the idea that were all even as i wouldn't be submissive to anyone but Tony and i don't have the right personality to be masterful either
Hope that makes sense
Shaz x
I'm with you on this one shaz!
m xx
